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deep dish peat moss

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deep dish peat moss









Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
To discover the special threat posed to their opperations by Jeff Goldbloom. He must be eliminated first. Or perhaps substituted for an imposter!

nut

laughing an alien off the face of the earth cuz they used “on fleek” in 2021

Heather Papps

hello friend


at least one alien culture breeds by shaking hands so everyone wear gloves



thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

FutonForensic

alien: "people of earth, line up in an orderly fashion for processing according to your only two possible genders"

me: *sucking air through my teeth for the universal sign of "yikesarooni"*


snergle

A kind little mouse!
aliens land in russia or eastern europe we bring you these rainbow flags in the month of june as is your custom. we wish to be friends.

alien peace mission guy who stayed in orbit talking to the alien president. they murdered your son i dont know what to say we brought them the flags in the right month.

the aliens all look like pavel petel

deep dish peat moss

FutonForensic posted:

alien: "people of earth, line up in an orderly fashion for processing according to your only two possible genders"

me: *sucking air through my teeth for the universal sign of "yikesarooni"*

Finger Prince


So, turns out they'll do anything for enough of their currency units... a-ny-thing.

Wow. So we didn't need to build all these disruptor ray blasters?

Nope.

And the mind control beam? We spent a hundred cycles perfecting that thing.

Yeah.

So, what. We just... Distribute currency units in exchange for their planetary resources and labour? No disruptor rays? No mind control?

Oh no, we'll still disruptor ray and mind control the poo poo out of them. Sunk cost fallacy and all that.

Sunk... Cost... What?

Yeah, that's another thing we learned from studying their culture.

nut

FutonForensic posted:

alien: "people of earth, line up in an orderly fashion for processing according to your only two possible genders"

me: *sucking air through my teeth for the universal sign of "yikesarooni"*

Nosfereefer

IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

FutonForensic posted:

alien: "people of earth, line up in an orderly fashion for processing according to your only two possible genders"

me: *sucking air through my teeth for the universal sign of "yikesarooni"*

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Nosfereefer

IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM
the aliens heavily studied our cultures during the 50's, and now their outreach is really awkward

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Twenty Four


Finger Prince posted:

So, turns out they'll do anything for enough of their currency units... a-ny-thing.

Wow. So we didn't need to build all these disruptor ray blasters?

Nope.

And the mind control beam? We spent a hundred cycles perfecting that thing.

Yeah.

So, what. We just... Distribute currency units in exchange for their planetary resources and labour? No disruptor rays? No mind control?

Oh no, we'll still disruptor ray and mind control the poo poo out of them. Sunk cost fallacy and all that.

Sunk... Cost... What?

Yeah, that's another thing we learned from studying their culture.

lol

Also from the above comics the Independence Day Will Smith "Welcome to Erf" quote has been a running gag with a couple of my ex roommate friends for many years in a mundane "yeah this is stupid but just how things happen" or "this is so weird wtf?" context so that got a chuckle out of me. :)

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
They plan to crash the global economy with a mater replicator but they can only configure it to produce one material so they set it to produce nonbiodegradable sheet plastic believing this to be the universal standard of measuring value in the human economy.

WithoutTheFezOn
Oh no

Prurient Squid posted:

a mater replicator

Jaguars!


Lumber yards.

Have you ever known anyone who didn't know what they were doing to come out of a lumber yard with a good result?

And I want to make this very clear, it ESPECIALLY goes for when the being in question assumes they are superior to the man who sells the lumber.

snergle

A kind little mouse!

Finger Prince posted:

So, turns out they'll do anything for enough of their currency units... a-ny-thing.


And the mind control beam? We spent a hundred cycles perfecting that thing.

Yeah.


are the aliens going to gently caress us? dont they know horny on is illegal!

Finger Prince


snergle posted:

are the aliens going to gently caress us? dont they know horny on is illegal!

They aren't explicitly going to gently caress us, but some of them may have hosed some of us, and although it was very transactional, they did appreciate the fuckee's efforts at faking enjoying it and that they didn't have to wheel out the mind control ray.

Twenty Four


Finger Prince posted:

They aren't explicitly going to gently caress us, but some of them may have hosed some of us, and although it was very transactional, they did appreciate the fuckee's efforts at faking enjoying it and that they didn't have to wheel out the mind control ray.

Aliens invade earth and humans in mass bend over and pull their pants down, expecting what they perceive to be the inevitable. Aliens misinterpreting this as a sign of greeting turn and do the same, and the great sexual alien standoff begins.

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
You can gently caress some of the humans all of the time and you can gently caress all of the humans all of the time - Alien Proverb

Nosfereefer

IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM
aliens failing to realize weed is legal, and keep lighting up behind buildings like dorks

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
Take me to your leader. Lenin.

Nosfereefer

IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

Prurient Squid posted:

Take me to your leader. Lenin.

this is why they still keep him around afaik

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Nosfereefer

IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM
first contact off to a rocky start as the aliens demands jesus back

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
Take me to your leader, Jesus Christ the great prophet of Islam.

Nosfereefer

IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM
turns out the aliens have just watched a ton of anime, and end up getting really confused and disillusioned when faced with the reality of earth

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

xcheopis


Nosfereefer posted:

turns out the aliens have just watched a ton of anime, and end up getting really confused and disillusioned when faced with the reality of earth

They were hoping for a chance to use the "Cleansing Fire" cannon.

deep dish peat moss

Finger Prince posted:

So, turns out they'll do anything for enough of their currency units... a-ny-thing.

Wow. So we didn't need to build all these disruptor ray blasters?

Nope.

And the mind control beam? We spent a hundred cycles perfecting that thing.

Yeah.

So, what. We just... Distribute currency units in exchange for their planetary resources and labour? No disruptor rays? No mind control?

Oh no, we'll still disruptor ray and mind control the poo poo out of them. Sunk cost fallacy and all that.

Sunk... Cost... What?

Yeah, that's another thing we learned from studying their culture.

The aliens from this post coming to earth and getting jobs in order to get currency units, like the key & peele bank robber skit

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Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.

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