- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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is this like harvey the rabbit? does anyone actually see the picture of the bear?
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Jul 9, 2021 00:37
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May 14, 2024 14:39
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- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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new jersey bears walk like this *walks arond on TWO legs* but new york bears walk like this *walks on three legs while flipping the bird with the fourth*
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Jul 9, 2021 16:40
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- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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whats the deal with bears
bear kramering it's way into jerry's apartment and then mauling him to death
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Jul 9, 2021 17:09
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- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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newman yelling "THE BEAR NEVER STOPS, JERRY!"
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Jul 9, 2021 17:15
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- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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jerry: so are you ready for the big date?
elaine: do bears poo poo in the wood?
jerry: im sorry? what?
elaine: it's an expression, like you've never heard it before?
jerry: i guess theres only so much you get to hear as a professional comedian
*laugh track*
elaine: it means "of course"
jerry: ah
jerry: it's a pretty specific phrase? like do bears do their business in the forest?
george: *scoffs* where else would they do it? in a public restroom?
*laugh track*
jerry: no, like, are all bears dropping deuces in the forest, aren't there bears who dont have the facilities availiable?
elaine: like those polar bears
george: so they have to migrate to relieve themselves?
*laugh track*
elaine: it's only an expression. like "one bird in the hand is worth two in the bush", its not meant to be taken literal
jerry: yeah, the bird-to-hand ratio would be totally depended on context. what if its a hand-biting bird?
*laugh track*
george: like a parro-
*the door to jerry's apartment slams open, a bewildered and excited kramer bursts through*
*audience cheers*
jerry: don't you ever knock?
kramer: you guys will never believe this, but theres a bear running wild in new york, doing his business in public restrooms
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Jul 9, 2021 17:42
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May 14, 2024 14:39
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- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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jerry: ... and so they're holding this "entertainment lunch" and all the members are expected to bring a friend
george: why are the comedians' guild expecting their members to have friends?
*laugh track*
jerry: *staring at george* i guess they're using a generous interpretation of the word
*laugh track*
elaine: well count me out, i'm having this entire thing with a certificated doctor that night
jerry: *visibly impressed* woah, talking about high society! and the name of this gentleman?
elaine: doctor singh
george: isn't your gp also named singh?
*laugh track*
jerry: george, please, its an extremely common surname, an-
elaine: i have a doctor's appointment
*laugh track*
jerry: anyway, who said i was going to invite mrs. singh to the event anyway
*elaine rolls her eyes*
george: i- uh, i also have a date with a doctor
george: ... or an appointment
jerry: really?
*laugh track*
george: all right, all right! i just don't want to visit those stuffy, self important funny-men, who make careers out of riffing air plane peanuts! okay?!
jerry: and that's why i never planned on inviting you in the first place
*bass solo*
*at the comedians guild event, as casualties are climbing*
jerry: jesus christ kramer! how? why?!
kramer: well, it wasn't easy, let me tell you that! i know this guy though, former soviet smuggler, see-
jerry: nevermind the how, why??
kramer: you specifically told me to bring my own bear
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Jul 9, 2021 18:22
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Jul 9, 2021 00:37
