[serious] teach me your chili ways

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biosterous

despite enjoying chili i have never made chili. my folks also didn't make chili growing up, so i don't have a family recipe to default to

orbs, how do you make your chili, please post recipes! i will probably make some of the chili(s) posted, and maybe pictures too?

(also please do not fight about the use of beans/beef/whatever, we are friends and this is a learning experience)

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he/him

# ? Aug 14, 2021 00:23

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# ? May 11, 2024 11:36

How Wonderful!: I only have excellent ideas

I will post my mom's recipe but it is for Cincinnati chili so it's a little bit of its own thing. I'll look for it tomorrow.

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# ? Aug 14, 2021 02:27

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

diced sweet onions, red bell pepper also some jalape�os, little less of carrots and little less of celery

saut� with butter and then add ground beef/pork

salt, pepper, chili powder and diced garlic or garlic powder

once brown don't drain the fat

add brown sugar, coffee, stewed tomatoes and tomato paste

black beans, kidney beans, pink beans

thin with beef stock or water

cook for hours to let everything get to know each other

keep tasting and seasoning as it cooks

# ? Aug 14, 2021 02:33

Heather Papps: hello friend

beanz,
meatz,
cook em up

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Aug 14, 2021 02:39

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

important question 4 u OP. do u have a slow cooker and how big is it

# ? Aug 14, 2021 03:53

Code Jockey: 69420 basic bytes free

Luvcow posted:

diced sweet onions, red bell pepper also some jalapeños, little less of carrots and little less of celery

sauté with butter and then add ground beef/pork

salt, pepper, chili powder and diced garlic or garlic powder

once brown don't drain the fat

add brown sugar, coffee, stewed tomatoes and tomato paste

black beans, kidney beans, pink beans

thin with beef stock or water

cook for hours to let everything get to know each other

keep tasting and seasoning as it cooks

sounds heavenly

I used to make big batches in my dutch oven, and basically did this

I liked using various little baggies of Mexican chili powders that my grocery store had, nice smoky ones. And garlic. So much garlic

And I used those big cans of peeled san marzano tomatoes and they would just break apart as it cooked

drat I need to make chili again

e. and while it's cooking, make cornbread!

# ? Aug 14, 2021 04:58

biosterous

Areola Grande posted:

important question 4 u OP. do u have a slow cooker and how big is it

yes, 4 quarts/3.78 litres

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he/him

# ? Aug 14, 2021 16:12

biosterous

Luvcow posted:

diced sweet onions, red bell pepper also some jalape�os, little less of carrots and little less of celery

saut� with butter and then add ground beef/pork

salt, pepper, chili powder and diced garlic or garlic powder

once brown don't drain the fat

add brown sugar, coffee, stewed tomatoes and tomato paste

black beans, kidney beans, pink beans

thin with beef stock or water

cook for hours to let everything get to know each other

keep tasting and seasoning as it cooks

after a few modifications to get rid of spouse-unfriendly ingredients this sounds really good :yayclod:

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he/him

# ? Aug 14, 2021 16:14

Manifisto

Luvcow posted:

diced sweet onions, red bell pepper also some jalape�os, little less of carrots and little less of celery

saut� with butter and then add ground beef/pork

salt, pepper, chili powder and diced garlic or garlic powder

once brown don't drain the fat

add brown sugar, coffee, stewed tomatoes and tomato paste

black beans, kidney beans, pink beans

thin with beef stock or water

cook for hours to let everything get to know each other

keep tasting and seasoning as it cooks

yum this sounds delicious

I am also a fan of the type of chili that uses chunks of meat instead of ground meat, it's a different experience but also good

I made a chili of this type out of the gourmet cookbook I think and it came out delicious. maybe it was this one?

https://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/beef-chili

these days I make vegetarian chili usually, a pretty simple but effective recipe is:

https://www.kitchentreaty.com/simple-instant-pot-vegan-black-bean-chili/

I don't have an instant pot but it comes out just fine without it

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Aug 14, 2021 17:19

How Wonderful!: I only have excellent ideas

Oh yeah, similarly I've often made J. Kenji Lopez-Alt's vegetarian tamale pie recipe but on lazy nights if you want to skip the cornbread it's just a really solid vegan chili on its own. Probably my favorite vegan chili to do chili fries with and definitely one of the easiest. I love it.

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# ? Aug 14, 2021 18:10

watho: The real world will, again tomorrow, function and run without me.

i usually wing it but some tips i will give is to add lime juice, cocoa powder, and/or honey. it makes it taste real good imo at least

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/BigClutteredJoey-mobile.mp4
thank u vanisher for the sig
and thank u nesamdoom for the good loops

# ? Aug 14, 2021 18:15

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

I have chili opinions but I reserve chilifight for GWS.

Bowl O Red is a classic way: https://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/true-texas-chili-355049

For bowl o red I double it, because it's for meat eaters, and I crank the spice up. More chilis. A few arbol for sure but why not add in some hotter ones, if you want. Don't want heat? Use a mild af dried pepper but increase garlic and cumin and maybe do a smoked paprika.

This one is very good New Mexican Style chili by Anthony Bourdain, patron saint of flavor: https://highlandsranchfoodie.com/anthony-bourdains-beef-chili-recipe/

Up the coriander if you want it to come off a little citrusy, up the cumin if you want smoky, and by all means leave off the tomato paste if you're a purist.

# ? Aug 14, 2021 18:24

idiotsavant

the key to good chili is to violently stab to death anyone who puts beans in their chili and also anyone who doesn�t put beans in their chili

# ? Aug 14, 2021 18:33

Chrs

this was posted in GWS 10 years ago and i still make it to this day

theysayheygreg posted:

I don't know if this particular recipe was posted in the last thread, but it's something I've been making for quite some time and I absolutely love it. I got it from a poster by the name of Slake over at Elitist Jerks. It's a 3-meat texas-style chili, super hearty and delicious. I make a big pot probably once a month during the winter for warmth and sustenance. (terrible phone photo warning:)

Ingredients:

2 tablespoons olive oil

2 pounds sirloin steak, cut into 1-inch cubes

1/2 pound ground beef

12 ounces chorizo sausage, casing removed, cut into 1/2 cubes

1 large yellow onion, coarsely chopped

1/4 cup chili powder

1 tablespoon garlic salt

2 teaspoons cumin

1 teaspoon dried basil

2 (14.5 oz) cans beef broth

2 (14.5 oz) cans whole tomatoes, drained

1/2 (12 oz) can Coca-Cola

1/2 (12 oz) can beer (your choice here, doesn't have a huge impact what you use, just make sure it's not too lovely)

1 cup cilantro, chopped

1 cinnamon stick

3 bay leaves

2-4 green jalapenos, slit lengthwise 3 times each (alternately, 1 habanero and 1 jalapeno)

1 tablespoon yellow cornmeal

Salt and pepper, to taste

Some notes:
You can tailor the meat to your budget. I always get nice sirloins cut up at my butcher, but any old stew meat will work (round, etc). I prefer spicy pork chorizo (again, my butcher makes it) because the chicken stuff doesn't taste right to me. I often substitute ground buffalo for ground beef if I can find it.

You can tailor the recipe to your level. You can make your own chili powder for instance. Or make your own beef stock.

The Coca Cola is there for sugar and a bit of acidity, but I often omit it and just use a whole beer. I usually make it with a brown ale, something Newcastle-y. Up to your tastes. I wouldn't use a stout personally, but a porter might be interesting.

This is a very mild recipe. I usually use 2 habaneros (seeded, diced) and 3-4 jalapenos (sliced). I like my chili hot.

I usually add 2 cans of red beans loosely drained. Begin beans/no beans debate

Directions:

Place oil in a large, heavy pot over medium heat. Brown the sirloin in
batches. Remove to a bowl with a slotted spoon.

Add ground beef, chorizo and onions to the pot and brown. Make sure to break up the meat.

Return sirloin to the pot and stir in remaining ingredients, except for garnishes.

Bring to a boil, reduce heat, simmer for 3-5 hours (longer is better). Stir occasionally, breaking up tomatoes.

Before serving, discard cinnamon stick and bay leaves (and habanero if you didn't dice them, don't want someone biting into that!). Garnish with cheese and sour cream, if desired.

I don't have a finished picture, but I'll try and remember to grab some the next time I make a batch. It does reduce and thicken up quite a bit, and to be honest, I think it's best the next day after it's been in the fridge. This is enough to feed a single dude like myself for like a week straight.

# ? Aug 14, 2021 18:33

Manifisto

pomegranate seeds.

the other day I was set on a journey of remembrance by the simple phrase, "pomegranate seeds." they were spoken by my twenty two year old son, meeple, as we were tending to the ostriches on our biodynamic ranch in south america. I asked meeple what he meant by that, and he said "what did I mean by what?" and so I told him and we had a huge laugh together when it was revealed he had actually said "the land is perilously dry, we need water before the fires come." but while that's pretty important to our ranch it is not important to this story, which is actually about my recipe for chili. eventually. I promise.

pomegranate seeds feature heavily in the myth of persephone, queen of the underworld, although the version I and my coven celebrate centers around an unripe plantain and some maraschino cherries. still, the pomegranate myth has persisted. I hope you'll forgive me a slight detour as I recount a few differing versions of this myth, the relevance of which will become apparent soon enough!

but first: some background about mesopotamian agriculture and a cuneiform curiosity, and a word about ants.

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Aug 14, 2021 18:42

your friend sk: (ヤイケス!)

YOUR FRIEND SK'S CHILI [2000 words of backstory omitted]

saute/brown about 1 - 1.5 lb of your chosen meat in your Instant Pot�. i like using italian sausage removed from the casing, but other meats or tempeh/TVP are just as good. add

* 1 can of black beans, rinsed
* 1 can of baked beans
* 1 can of corn (controversial), drained
* 1 large can of crushed tomatoes
* 1 diced bell pepper
* 1+ diced serrano pepper, or a can of serrano pepper in chipotle sauce
* 1+ minced jalape�o(s) or habanero(s) to taste
* 1 large diced onion
* minced garlic to taste
* powders to taste: chili, onion, garlic, white pepper, black pepper, cayenne pepper, smoked paprika
* about 6 oz of your favorite fine american lager

PRO TIP: use as many colors as possible to make the chili look nice! yellow bell pepper and red onion make it not look like a tomato swamp

cook on high pressure for 30 minutes, then let sit 10 minutes and manually vent. if it's too thin, you can saute while stirring frequently to boil some liquid off. you can also add a Tbsp or two of corn starch, but that will be more helpful in thickening the leftovers overnight.

(if you don't have an Instant Pot�, everything is the same except done in a saucepan on the stove. saute meat/protein in the saucepan, add other ingredients, and simmer as low as possible, stirring often to prevent burning until it reaches the desired consistency.)

i like to serve it with cheddar cheese, tortilla chips, and/or sour cream. you can also use the leftovers (which will thicken up a bit in the fridge) to make some nachos the next day!

Join the BYOB Army

^{thank you again Saoshyant!!}

# ? Aug 14, 2021 19:22

your friend sk: (ヤイケス!)

Manifisto posted:

pomegranate seeds.

the other day I was set on a journey of remembrance by the simple phrase, "pomegranate seeds." they were spoken by my twenty two year old son, meeple, as we were tending to the ostriches on our biodynamic ranch in south america. I asked meeple what he meant by that, and he said "what did I mean by what?" and so I told him and we had a huge laugh together when it was revealed he had actually said "the land is perilously dry, we need water before the fires come." but while that's pretty important to our ranch it is not important to this story, which is actually about my recipe for chili. eventually. I promise.

pomegranate seeds feature heavily in the myth of persephone, queen of the underworld, although the version I and my coven celebrate centers around an unripe plantain and some maraschino cherries. still, the pomegranate myth has persisted. I hope you'll forgive me a slight detour as I recount a few differing versions of this myth, the relevance of which will become apparent soon enough!

but first: some background about mesopotamian agriculture and a cuneiform curiosity, and a word about ants.

lol

# ? Aug 14, 2021 19:22

Code Jockey: 69420 basic bytes free

Manifisto posted:

pomegranate seeds.

the other day I was set on a journey of remembrance by the simple phrase, "pomegranate seeds." they were spoken by my twenty two year old son, meeple, as we were tending to the ostriches on our biodynamic ranch in south america. I asked meeple what he meant by that, and he said "what did I mean by what?" and so I told him and we had a huge laugh together when it was revealed he had actually said "the land is perilously dry, we need water before the fires come." but while that's pretty important to our ranch it is not important to this story, which is actually about my recipe for chili. eventually. I promise.

pomegranate seeds feature heavily in the myth of persephone, queen of the underworld, although the version I and my coven celebrate centers around an unripe plantain and some maraschino cherries. still, the pomegranate myth has persisted. I hope you'll forgive me a slight detour as I recount a few differing versions of this myth, the relevance of which will become apparent soon enough!

but first: some background about mesopotamian agriculture and a cuneiform curiosity, and a word about ants.

# ? Aug 14, 2021 19:36

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

Manifisto posted:

pomegranate seeds.

the other day I was set on a journey of remembrance by the simple phrase, "pomegranate seeds." they were spoken by my twenty two year old son, meeple, as we were tending to the ostriches on our biodynamic ranch in south america. I asked meeple what he meant by that, and he said "what did I mean by what?" and so I told him and we had a huge laugh together when it was revealed he had actually said "the land is perilously dry, we need water before the fires come." but while that's pretty important to our ranch it is not important to this story, which is actually about my recipe for chili. eventually. I promise.

pomegranate seeds feature heavily in the myth of persephone, queen of the underworld, although the version I and my coven celebrate centers around an unripe plantain and some maraschino cherries. still, the pomegranate myth has persisted. I hope you'll forgive me a slight detour as I recount a few differing versions of this myth, the relevance of which will become apparent soon enough!

but first: some background about mesopotamian agriculture and a cuneiform curiosity, and a word about ants.

lmao

# ? Aug 14, 2021 19:46

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

Manifisto posted:

pomegranate seeds.

the other day I was set on a journey of remembrance by the simple phrase, "pomegranate seeds." they were spoken by my twenty two year old son, meeple, as we were tending to the ostriches on our biodynamic ranch in south america. I asked meeple what he meant by that, and he said "what did I mean by what?" and so I told him and we had a huge laugh together when it was revealed he had actually said "the land is perilously dry, we need water before the fires come." but while that's pretty important to our ranch it is not important to this story, which is actually about my recipe for chili. eventually. I promise.

pomegranate seeds feature heavily in the myth of persephone, queen of the underworld, although the version I and my coven celebrate centers around an unripe plantain and some maraschino cherries. still, the pomegranate myth has persisted. I hope you'll forgive me a slight detour as I recount a few differing versions of this myth, the relevance of which will become apparent soon enough!

but first: some background about mesopotamian agriculture and a cuneiform curiosity, and a word about ants.

This is the intro speech to The People's Key by Bright Eyes and you will not convince me otherwise.

# ? Aug 14, 2021 19:53

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

I thought this was the chili forum

# ? Aug 14, 2021 19:57

Chrs

Manifisto posted:

pomegranate seeds.

the other day I was set on a journey of remembrance by the simple phrase, "pomegranate seeds." they were spoken by my twenty two year old son, meeple, as we were tending to the ostriches on our biodynamic ranch in south america. I asked meeple what he meant by that, and he said "what did I mean by what?" and so I told him and we had a huge laugh together when it was revealed he had actually said "the land is perilously dry, we need water before the fires come." but while that's pretty important to our ranch it is not important to this story, which is actually about my recipe for chili. eventually. I promise.

pomegranate seeds feature heavily in the myth of persephone, queen of the underworld, although the version I and my coven celebrate centers around an unripe plantain and some maraschino cherries. still, the pomegranate myth has persisted. I hope you'll forgive me a slight detour as I recount a few differing versions of this myth, the relevance of which will become apparent soon enough!

but first: some background about mesopotamian agriculture and a cuneiform curiosity, and a word about ants.

there should be a recipe book which is like 200 pages of this bullshit and then theres one bang average chili recipe at the end

# ? Aug 14, 2021 19:57

idiotsavant

Manifisto posted:

pomegranate seeds.

the other day I was set on a journey of remembrance by the simple phrase, "pomegranate seeds." they were spoken by my twenty two year old son, meeple, as we were tending to the ostriches on our biodynamic ranch in south america. I asked meeple what he meant by that, and he said "what did I mean by what?" and so I told him and we had a huge laugh together when it was revealed he had actually said "the land is perilously dry, we need water before the fires come." but while that's pretty important to our ranch it is not important to this story, which is actually about my recipe for chili. eventually. I promise.

pomegranate seeds feature heavily in the myth of persephone, queen of the underworld, although the version I and my coven celebrate centers around an unripe plantain and some maraschino cherries. still, the pomegranate myth has persisted. I hope you'll forgive me a slight detour as I recount a few differing versions of this myth, the relevance of which will become apparent soon enough!

but first: some background about mesopotamian agriculture and a cuneiform curiosity, and a word about ants.

well i made the chili but substituted dried lemongrass flakes for the onion (my cat is extremely allergic) and my husband hates beef so i made it a fish chili and also swapped out the paprika for about an etsy�s worth of deep ennui and now my children hate me. any tips? what did I miss

# ? Aug 14, 2021 20:56

How Wonderful!: I only have excellent ideas

Mormon Nailer posted:

This is the intro speech to The People's Key by Bright Eyes and you will not convince me otherwise.

We're going to a party
It's a birthday party, it's your birthday party
Happy birthday, darlin
We love you very,
very,
very,
very,
very,
very,
very pomegranate seed

-sig by Manifisto! goblin by Khanstant! News and possum by deep dish peat moss!

# ? Aug 14, 2021 21:05

your friend sk: (ヤイケス!)

Areola Grande posted:

I thought this was the chili forum

# ? Aug 14, 2021 22:28

pnac attack: by Fluffdaddy

Areola Grande posted:

I thought this was the chili forum

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Aug 15, 2021 05:38

alnilam

Areola Grande posted:

I thought this was the chili forum

# ? Aug 15, 2021 06:10

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

watho posted:

i usually wing it but some tips i will give is to add lime juice, cocoa powder, and/or honey. it makes it taste real good imo at least

looks like ur post wasn't strictly a joke :yikes:

# ? Aug 15, 2021 06:43

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

A lot of good chili has at minimum cocoa powder in it. Mole is a prime example of why this is a good idea: cacao and capsicum play together well.

Wait until you find out about the coffee in the chili.

# ? Aug 15, 2021 07:05

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

# ? Aug 15, 2021 07:23

watho: The real world will, again tomorrow, function and run without me.

i wasn�t joking. cocoa and chili mixes really well. either in the form of chili in chocolate or in the form of cocoa powder in a chili, i don�t always do the cocoa powder but i always do quite a bit of lime juice and little bit of honey in mine

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/BigClutteredJoey-mobile.mp4
thank u vanisher for the sig
and thank u nesamdoom for the good loops

# ? Aug 15, 2021 13:35

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

watho posted:

i wasn’t joking. cocoa and chili mixes really well. either in the form of chili in chocolate or in the form of cocoa powder in a chili, i don’t always do the cocoa powder but i always do quite a bit of lime juice and little bit of honey in mine

This plus I add some cafe bustelo (no joke), not much, to punch it up. It's good. This goon knows.

If you can get Mexican hemp honey it's real fuckin good, it's got those earthy tastes to it that make the cocoa and coffee blend real nice into guajillo flavor too so it's just chili+.

# ? Aug 15, 2021 13:40

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

watho posted:

i wasn�t joking. cocoa and chili mixes really well. either in the form of chili in chocolate or in the form of cocoa powder in a chili, i don�t always do the cocoa powder but i always do quite a bit of lime juice and little bit of honey in mine

it's the bitter flavor you want, that's why I use coffee. chili is about getting all those flavors to marry.

# ? Aug 15, 2021 15:38

pnac attack: by Fluffdaddy

when there's cocoa with your meat, and it tastes good to eat, that's a mole

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

# ? Aug 15, 2021 16:07

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

pnac attack posted:

when there's cocoa with your meat, and it tastes good to eat, that's a mole

# ? Aug 15, 2021 16:09

Manifisto

pnac attack posted:

when there's cocoa with your meat, and it tastes good to eat, that's a mole

ty nesamdoom!

# ? Aug 15, 2021 17:15

alnilam

pnac attack posted:

when there's cocoa with your meat, and it tastes good to eat, that's a mole

_{ty manifisto}

# ? Aug 15, 2021 17:21

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

pnac attack posted:

when there's cocoa with your meat, and it tastes good to eat, that's a mole

lol. lesson learned

# ? Aug 15, 2021 19:14

idiotsavant

Mormon Nailer posted:

A lot of good chili has at minimum cocoa powder in it. Mole is a prime example of why this is a good idea: cacao and capsicum play together well.

Wait until you find out about the coffee in the chili.

braising with coffee is the real gangster poo poo

# ? Aug 15, 2021 20:37

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# ? May 11, 2024 11:36

idiotsavant

pnac attack posted:

when there's cocoa with your meat, and it tastes good to eat, that's a mole

# ? Aug 15, 2021 20:37

The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > [serious] teach me your chili ways

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