[COVID] 1 Million! We did it! :toot: :911:

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > [COVID] 1 Million! We did it! :toot: :911:

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

we passed another masked family on the hiking trail and it was the first time that's ever happened where it wasn't "oh poo poo they have masks we need to put ours on too" from 10' out.

# ¿ Aug 17, 2021 16:45

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 10, 2024 14:16

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Lovelyn posted:

Horrifying work story about proning:

We have 5 patients on proning rotations on the floor today. Our proning schedule is 16 hours proned, 8 hours supined/side-lying. I was helping the team when one shared a story about a patient who was proned and was lying on his dick. It went ischemic (lost blood flow) and he had 2/3 of his dick and his nuts amputated. Helluva thing to wake up to after being sedated for days/weeks.

uh isn't this malpractice

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 15:51

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Lacrosse posted:

lol at all the goons trying to lie about being immunocompromised and getting turned away when all they had to lie about was being there for their first dose

my friends all volunteered at clinics last winter so they could skip the line and get their shots early as healthcare workers and now they're all trying to figure out how to get a booster since it was 6+ months ago.

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 00:24

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

I've been vaccinated fully since June and I've yet to put myself in a situation where anyone is obligated or required to verify my vaccination status.

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 02:48

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

ok I've seen enough; I'm calling it

Covid seems bad

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 03:12

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Shiroc posted:

I changed my legal name since getting my first two doses done. Maybe I should just do another 2 in my new name so I have a clean card. Then get my 'booster.'

you need to become more booster than poster.

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 03:59

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Iron Crowned posted:

My parents sent me a Christmas ornament "2020, a year to forget" and I looked at it and thought the same thing.

my SIL dressed up as a giant middle finger for Halloween last year and had a "gently caress 2020" sign. wonder if she kept that outfit...

# ¿ Aug 20, 2021 02:14

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Lacrosse posted:

People in blue states are looking at the South going 'well at least that won't happen here where we were good and took our vaxx' and like, I just got done watching a friend almost die from an untreated acute illness because his care was delayed by >24 hrs thanks to there being no hospitals in neither Spokane nor Seattle that would take him. We were out of hospital beds over a week ago and it's continuing to get worse!

we were masked at a state park last week and a family passed us from behind and the dude loudly started talking and said "if they all get it in Florida then fine!"

then I noticed his wife had a mask on but he and their kids didn't.

# ¿ Aug 20, 2021 03:13

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

my partner keeps telling me that it's my choice whether or not to quit my job so we can do another year of virtual and I hate that it's framed as a choice because it sure as gently caress doesn't feel like a choice.

# ¿ Aug 20, 2021 03:17

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

fosborb posted:

"whatever you want to do"

"whatever you feel is safe"

like yeah I can completely abdicate all responsibility to my children's health just because I want more money I guess. clearly we don't need it and we can coast on her dumb job.

she keeps asking me if I "want" to go back to work and I'm like gently caress NO WHO WANTS TO WORK EVER?

# ¿ Aug 20, 2021 03:22

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

I wonder if folks are gonna start kissing the beautiful men and the women in the crowd as a result of regeneron

# ¿ Aug 20, 2021 03:37

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

the best thing to come out of all this is that I stopped cutting my hair and now I tie it back into a lil bun in the back of my head like I'm Johnny fuckin Tremaine

# ¿ Aug 21, 2021 00:29

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

https://westseattleblog.com/2021/08/weekend-note-flutes-in-the-forest-3-canceled/

quote:

We got word from the musicians that they have to cancel the plans for tomorrow�s performance at Schmitz Park because of illness, but they add, �Thank you for your interest; we do love our fans! We hope to reschedule soon.�

yeah okay illness. got it.

# ¿ Aug 21, 2021 00:42

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Lacrosse posted:

I made the mistake of trying to enjoy the Oregon Coast several years ago during the last week of August and boy was that a mistake; people everywhere holy poo poo. Next time I'm waiting until mid-September before I go anywhere

we are going camping on Orcas in late September and it's going to own bones

# ¿ Aug 21, 2021 03:51

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

went to a deserted playground yesterday with my son and suddenly I started to hear this loud honking sound every few minutes.

turns out there were two kids riding scooters behind a portable school building and I couldn't see them. one of them had the loudest dry cough I've ever heard from a child.

we got the gently caress out

# ¿ Aug 21, 2021 15:51

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Schmoe Cwead posted:

https://twitter.com/PFTompkins/status/1428848598721064962

drat I need to get me some sloppy qwoppy

# ¿ Aug 21, 2021 20:49

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud posted:

Also saw this sign out in the chudlands

when I was in my early twenties my neighbor tried to hire me for a job and after I explained the details to my girlfriend she said "that sounds exactly like an estate robbery".

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 02:11

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

I just checked and mine is like 85.

not great not terrible.

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 03:52

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Casey Finnigan posted:

my resting heart rate was like 85 even when I was doing track and field and working out all the time. it's probably something horrific now tho

I'm lying down on a heating pad having a back spasm and a mild anxiety attack though so who can say

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 03:56

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

I honestly can't even walk because I decided to sort Lego all morning and then stand up cooking in the kitchen all afternoon.

but still. don't have Covid.

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 03:58

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Gio posted:

https://twitter.com/natesilver538/status/1337146274655694850?s=21

just remembering the hits

https://twitter.com/NateSilver538/status/1337152050614984704?s=20

lol. lmao.

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 16:55

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Pardot posted:

Look i'm cool with getting extra vaxes, but who the hell is getting extra hearts

I got that grinchectomy

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 17:14

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

it's funny how every conversation you overhear is about Covid now. lol.

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 17:15

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Zisky posted:

Vaccines were a convenient bogeyman for rich white ladies with autistic kids that couldn't stand the thought of a fault in their own DNA.

it's not just rich people. my chud cousin has a kid with high functioning autism and she's the same kind of batshit stupid crazy.

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 00:38

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

I went for a walk this morning and of the two phone conversations I overheard, both of them were about Covid.

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 01:40

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

I'll email now.

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 01:46

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

gregday posted:

https://twitter.com/SCCgov/status/1429171588772007946

lol

learn to code blue

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 17:14

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

it's truly wild that my father, who we had to constantly nag and cajole into getting vaccinated, is now using the line "it's a pandemic of the unvaccinated!" to justify whatever it is he's doing.

the guy voted for trump twice and he's already repeating Joe's lines.

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 17:18

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

https://twitter.com/gracelworth/status/1429539984512585734?s=20

drat I want that shirt

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 18:57

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

it's weird how we were hearing "youth EUA will come in late fall/early winter" and then days before most kids go back to in person school this story gets pimped everywhere about the impending 12 and under jabs.

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 20:52

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

someone is blowing a vuvuzela at this oakland a's game

# ¿ Aug 24, 2021 02:42

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

SirPablo posted:

Hit me with your best horse paste recipes.

hit me with your best shod
why don't you hit me with your best shod
hit me with your best shod
I'll whinny and neeeeeeeeigh

# ¿ Aug 24, 2021 03:39

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Stereotype posted:

yeah it�s 1312 people who can never test positive for covid again.

All Covids Are Brutal

# ¿ Aug 24, 2021 16:04

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

lmao that they took Cummo's fake Emmy away

# ¿ Aug 24, 2021 21:28

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

it will never stop being funny to me that the people who derided an entire generation of people for doing the tide pod challenge are now eating horse paste.

# ¿ Aug 25, 2021 02:16

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Gunshow Poophole posted:

the pfizza
the j&jizza
inspectvermect
old dirty bastard
horse paste killah

just the flu tang clan

# ¿ Aug 25, 2021 15:51

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Tzen posted:

lmaoooooooooooooooooo

Seattle Public Schools just had a virtual townhall and q&a to address covid and safety concerns

all of the top voted questions on the public q&a form were related to "why is there no virtual option for all schools" "no school that has opened in america hasn't had outbreaks, what makes sps different" "please address thresholds for when sps will shut down classrooms or entire schools due to continued quarantine" etc etc etc

so of course they never even acknowledge those questions, didn't answer them, didn't mention them, nothing

instead answered all the softball questions

loving driving full speed ahead off a cliff

these loving motherfuckers

lol glad we got on the virtual school option when we did.

now my kid magically attends Queen Anne Elementary.

# ¿ Aug 25, 2021 17:22

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Harry Potter on Ice posted:

Alright richy rich quit rubbing it in. Too bad it doesnt put you in one of the houses there too

I've been astral projecting myself to UQA for months.

# ¿ Aug 25, 2021 17:28

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

I quit my job today because I have to be at home to watch my kids full time and now my buddy is telling to me learn 2 code and I want 2 scream.

# ¿ Aug 25, 2021 17:58

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 10, 2024 14:16

DR FRASIER KRANG: Feb 4, 2005; "Are you forgetting that just this afternoon I was punched in the face by a turtle now dead?

Tzen posted:

congrats man, you're doing everything right

I feel like I am doing the right thing but my brain is on fire right now.

also now I gotta take down my PROUD UNION HOME sign I think. can't be a poser.

# ¿ Aug 25, 2021 18:27

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > [COVID] 1 Million! We did it! :toot: :911:

«‹›30 »