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Well, well, well. We once again find ourselves at the most precarious precipice of criticality: the start of another season of NFL football, and the 18th season of SAS Eliminator. So much has happened since last we played. There are more weeks in the regular season! There are (sort of) less in the pre-season! Tom Brady frustratingly won another Super Bowl! The NFL actually for real crushed our data scraping ability AND our odds source finally outpaced our advanced hueristic technique of parsing a webpage with regex! It's been quite an off-season, but your intrepid SAS Eliminator team of ElFurbe, Qwijib0, and Multigl have toiled in the hot code mines and, just above the balrog, we found a way. Since the NFL web team only loves people who pay them exorbitant amounts of money, we have turned our eyes to The Mouse, to the long shadow enveloping the media landscape, the mighty, the terrifying, Disney and their Entertainment and Sports Programming Network (if you have any whimsy in you at all, make the SportsCenter noise in your head right now). Through the wonders of their apparent indifference to anonymous usage of their data, the schedule and score info we must have now comes from them. You hopefully won't notice anything different, but if you do, that's probably why. Our long-standing odds feed source, Pinnacle, successfully defeated our machinations so we have found a new intermediary that delivers us a feed of Fanduel-sourced odds. Plus side, they deliver odds for games further into the future so you have opportunities, if you are so inclined, to snag very early lines. Down side, no more pre-season odds. Such are the days of our lives. But enough about that, you'll surely be glad to know that absolutely nothing about the games has changed at all. Eliminator: The Original. Each week you pick a single team you think will win and that team is eliminated from your choices for the rest of the season. Who will we all pick against this year? Someone in the NFC East, probably (The Giants, pass it on). Pickem: This time it's for real. Pick a winner in every single game every single week as if you have nothing better to do. Never forget that even if your team is probably going to lose, picking against them is a war crime. Reverse: Throw that car into R. Imagine instead of picking winners, you picked losers! It's like being able to hedge every single pick! Spread: Playskool Gambling for Babies. Make a pick with the bonus consternation of the current point spread as determined by what you would assume is math but is actually economic factors exclusively! Funbucks: All the complicated gambling, none of the broken knees. Take fake money and do whatever it is people do at sports betting places and hopefully turn it into more fake money! Parlando your parlay in your parlor with a parlimentarian. So there you have it, friends. Sign in now to manage your games and pick your poisons for week one. Check in on your groups and cast a weather eye over your potential nemeses for the year. As is our way, email reminders will start flowing soon. Hashtag neverforget that on your home dashboard you will find three featured picks from your ol' pals here at SAS Eliminator Central. The Stone Cold Lock of the Century of the Week: Imagine a ouija board but it has NFL team logos on it, Qwijib0 is hovering over it, concentrating intently, asking the spirits to give him a winner. The YOLOngshot: They can't all be sure things or it wouldn't be fun, right? Get out on the ledge with LauraKat and show some love to an underdog. The Binford 6100 Sports Better: Someday we're gonna figure out how to let the Binford 6100 Sports Better play the games against you but until then, one pick a week from the questionable programming of ElFurbe. What more could you hope to read? Log in and get after it already! Oh no, you forgot your password, did you? There, there. We all fail sometimes. forgotten password Find a bug or have a clever idea to improve eliminator? Submit them to our issue tracker and we'll give them all the consideration they deserve. As ever and always, we doff our caps to the Godfather of SAS Eliminator, Reaper, who did this to us all, and we wish good fortune on each of your seasons, unless they're better than our seasons, in which case, you know, spread the luck around, Windfall McLuckyBreak, it's tough out here. --- Season 17 recap: Congrats to all Seven! people who went 17-0 in eliminator. pre:1 Youngbhoy 1 Phoenicianite 1 Copernic 1 Cowfish 1 Shauna 1 cheesetriangles 1 wafflezombie wafflezombie didn't even manage to triple their initial balance, with a final total of $2873, and was one of 3 people to leave the saseliminator sports book with a profit. --- Worst Bloodbaths Ever! 2004 Week 9 First year of eliminator and very few bets, but the Giants and Chiefs went down and when the smoke cleared only 25% of players were still standing. 2005 Week 1 The game that made Rura swear off Rams bets forever. 4 complete seasons since and not once has he bet on that cursed team. 2006 Week 7 Cards and Jags combined to break the hearts of well over 100 people. 29.76% remained. 2007 Week 10 Damned Saints! This was the year the Saints had suddenly become good. Unfortunately the ghost of Archie Manning put a hex on the team and they went down, taking 76 brave souls with them. (The hex was made more powerful by Archie not being dead.) 27.86% survived. 2010 Week 16 The latest mass elimination in the history of the game. 6 of the top 8 teams (ordered by # of bets) went down in flames and only 20.9% survived. 2013 Week 10 Jaguars beat Titans. Whoops. 15.49% made it through. 2015 Week 2 The god damned Saints again. Brees takes a massive L in his own stadium at the hands of Jameis Winston and the Buccaneers for Winston's first ever NFL win. Later that day, the Ravens give up a touchdown with 30 seconds left in the 4th to go down 33-37 against the Raiders. Yikes. Only 12.3% survived the worst bloodbath in Eliminator history. 2018 Week 3 In an exciting change of pace, it was the Vikings letting everyone down. Only 25.57% made it through. 2019 Week 10 Oh look, the Saints again, who could have predicted. Luckily the Colts pulled it out... oh wait, neither did they. Kill rate of 87%. ---
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Sep 1, 2021 23:52
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Lordy
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Sep 2, 2021 00:05
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Hell yeah let's do this. Maybe I won't forget to keep up again this year.
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Sep 2, 2021 03:55
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I ALMOST picked the Rams before I remembered my one rule.
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Sep 2, 2021 05:01
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God I love this time of the year, thanks again guys for running this.
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Sep 3, 2021 00:00
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Glad to see this back, thanks for all the hard work.
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Sep 4, 2021 05:51
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Thank you, Eliminator team. I'm ready to rumble 
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Sep 4, 2021 13:47
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I remembered to find the thread before game 1, for once! Here's to all my fellow degenerates who play every game on Eliminator. The few, the proud, the obsessive completionists. Everyone who doesn't bet in Reverse Spread Pickem is a coward! Look at this poo poo: https://saseliminator.com/leaderboard/pickem/2020/REG/all/public/a/rev Nine participants? I sneer at those of you not on this hallowed list. Also lol I hit exactly .500 on the season and only one person did better, hahah.
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Sep 5, 2021 00:13
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It is just busy work since you should have the same record as pickem, just... the opposite picks.
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Sep 5, 2021 01:44
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You are receiving this broadcast as a dream...We are transmitting from the year one nine... nine nine ...You are receiving this broadcast in order t
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I did 9ers in elim and cards in reverse elim.
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Sep 7, 2021 03:52
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Pain of Mind posted:It is just busy work since you should have the same record as pickem, just... the opposite picks. You don't have to make exactly the opposite picks. I often have some cases that I think are basically coinflips and I like to pick them to both win and lose across pickem/reverse pickem. Same deal with spreads. Also odds on spreads shift over time so sometimes later in the week I can lock in a more favorable spread for regular or reverse than I got earlier in the week for the other game...
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Sep 7, 2021 04:30
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Eifert Posting posted:I did 9ers in elim and cards in reverse elim.  your reverse season
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Sep 7, 2021 22:06
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I have a feeling the Texans are going to be giving out a lot of easy Eliminator wins until a bloodbath late in the season when they upset someone. Of course I'm not picking the Jaguars in Week 1 either so. 
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Sep 8, 2021 20:21
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put all my funbucks on the Bucs, excited to see if I go bust in record time
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Sep 9, 2021 00:22
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It's been so long I almost forgot which eliminator pick was which. Now watch me pick wrong for both.
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Sep 9, 2021 01:08
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Acebuckeye13 posted:put all my funbucks on the Bucs, excited to see if I go bust in record time that's the great thing about funbucks though, you can go bust 17 times in a row! unlike in real life where if I've spent all my money on 7-11 scratchers and tiny crack rocks that's it, I'm done Taerkar posted:It's been so long I almost forgot which eliminator pick was which. you almost forgot but I did forget. eliminator seems to suggest that you are choosing teams to be eliminated, aka lose. but I seem to remember you are actually picking teams to win, maybe? regardless my chance of being correct is about equal so maybe it doesn't matter
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Sep 9, 2021 01:14
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Welp. Serves me right for getting my bets in early this week... Suddenly not feeling too great about the Ravens.
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Sep 9, 2021 22:30
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I placed by bets for week 1. I swear I'll remember to bet this time. I'm doing better than the last few seasons where I'd forget week 1 and then just not bet at all.
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Sep 9, 2021 22:41
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Week one so far: Everyone loves the Rams Someone loves the Bears 
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Sep 12, 2021 17:21
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How much of a bloodbath are we looking at so far?
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Sep 12, 2021 23:19
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Taerkar posted:How much of a bloodbath are we looking at so far? 32 people show 0-1 in eliminator. Kalli Spectrum Analyser scissorkick Tadicakes11 jzev PeteCFC Nit Wit Dog poo poo magicpants Darth Brooks canyonero Starks heighlylikely Pasaluki Bartsinho Viewparkbhoy lennonite DJQ esperantinc Cerdito The Fear Boners boxer180 cheesetriangles Damar Madjock Pale Horse NSY Edward Mass mazrim2112 King Hong Kong LauraKat Jethro Fr Stone
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Sep 13, 2021 00:32
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So much riding on the Rams tonight I bet.
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Sep 13, 2021 00:54
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I survived in eliminator, reverse eliminator, and spread eliminator, but I got loving wrecked in pick-em and funbucks.
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Sep 13, 2021 13:06
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1-0 in all 4 elimination games, I don't think I've ever done that. over .500 in spread pick-em too!
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Sep 13, 2021 19:01
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 Considering how unpredictable week 1 is, I'm declaring victory after going .500 in pick-em/spread pick-em, not losing out on any eliminators (thank you, Touchdown Tom), and hitting on a 3-way spread parlay for ~1,100 fun dollars.
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Sep 13, 2021 19:15
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JPrime posted:1-0 in all 4 elimination games, I don't think I've ever done that. over .500 in spread pick-em too! Bah I missed my spread eliminators by half a loving point betting on the Jets, what kind of score is 19. In the future, Panthers I'd like to see something a little more classic, tried and true you know. Like, say, 17 6-9 in spread pick em, which has its own rewards of being extremely nice, I'll get to .500 in regular pick em if the Ravens win and 10-6 in reverse pick em (on games I'm not sure about I often choose opposites in normal and reverse pick em, just so I can win in one or the other) The top group in pick em getting 12 correct is damned impressive for week 1, I'm already so far behind
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Sep 13, 2021 20:23
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i have aids (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Sep 13, 2021 20:38
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Bleh. 5-10 in pickem, and 0-1 in both reverse eliminator and reverse spread eliminator. My parlay can still pay out if the Ravens beat the -4.5 spread, though, so that'd be nice.
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Sep 13, 2021 23:25
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Play posted:
it's all downhill from here for me
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Sep 13, 2021 23:50
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Leperflesh posted:Bleh. 5-10 in pickem, and 0-1 in both reverse eliminator and reverse spread eliminator. My parlay can still pay out if the Ravens beat the -4.5 spread, though, so that'd be nice. welp lol
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Sep 14, 2021 06:20
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Welp, never gone out in one week before. Assassinated by the vaccine-coward Lamar Jackson. Maybe I can go 16-1.
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Sep 14, 2021 14:57
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Time to lose all of my funbucks! Also I have no idea what Moneyline bets are.
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Sep 14, 2021 15:24
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Taerkar posted:Also I have no idea what Moneyline bets are. Moneyline is straight win/loss for whichever team you're betting on. The + and - numbers are confusing but that's the basic thing. A dog being +200 means if you bet 100 bucks on the team and it hit you'd win 200. A favorite being -200 would mean you'd have to bet 200 bucks to win a hundred. I don't know when or how this became the go to way to do this but that's how it works. Hardcore gamblers have always kinda been D&D players putting a significant amount of their life savings at risk I think. e: This leads to gaming things out of course, if you believe the Texans have a shot against the Browns this week there's value in a bet at +480. If you believe the Browns will roll there's little value in -650 even if you win. Thinking all of this through is why I don't gamble. Also because I would lose all the time. Grittybeard fucked around with this message at 17:41 on Sep 14, 2021 |
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Sep 14, 2021 15:36
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7-9 in pick em this week. that is loving ugly. I'm guessing the vast majority chose the Ravens last night
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Sep 14, 2021 17:00
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Play posted:7-9 in pick em this week. that is loving ugly. I'm guessing the vast majority chose the Ravens last night I switched to take the raiders across all the pick-em games after all the ravens' RBs died, but watching the game, I was much more confident in a Ravens loss than I should have been. That was a close drat game that could have gone either way. Funbuck bets are locked in when you make them, unfortunately, and I put mine in just before gus edwards died because I was excited.
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Sep 14, 2021 17:31
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5-11 in Pickem! Good lord I'd have been better off literally flipping a coin
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Sep 14, 2021 22:05
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Lol here we go with this poo poo again.
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Sep 19, 2021 02:27
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Cleveland is far and away the #1 pick this week in eliminator. If we lose this week, I get the consolation prize of it being a total bloodbath in eliminator.
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Sep 19, 2021 17:47
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This is why I don't bet with actual money. Nearly all of my funbucks are gone.
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Sep 20, 2021 02:39
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| # ? May 7, 2024 18:57 |
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welp
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Sep 20, 2021 04:04
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