The First Omnist Church

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AmazingK: Nov 30, 2013; You are speaking with the Digimon Emperor!

https://www.linkedin.com/company/omnism

The First Omnist Church is the first formal organization for Omnists and Omnism. It is registered as a non-profit religious educational institution in the State of Hawaii (2020) in good standing and with the IRS as a religion organization (2018). I am the Minister of Religion and will explain brief what we believe in...

Omnism: Belief that every religion has some truth to it with perhaps no religion having all truths.
First Omnist Church: Omnist organization with a strict, fundamentalist, interpretation of the beliefs in every religion and the messiahs.

1 Timothy 2:5
"For there is one God, and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus;"

The "Omnist Messiah" is the one mediator between God and men because Jesus Christ IS God, "the father the son".

It is free to join the church and our organization/beliefs and you can even let me know if you'd like to be a minister for free as well, but I don't want to make this post a giant recruitment ad for goons... :V

We have thousands of believers worldwide and our small church has a handful of volunteers that is steadily growing since THE OMNIST MESSIAH HAS ARRIVED.
"Go forth and make disciples of all religions." - The Omnist Messiah

Questions?

# ? Sep 8, 2021 09:20

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# ? May 9, 2024 03:57

Bronze Fonz: Feb 14, 2019

Why would you need such an organization instead of, you know, just believing those things?

# ? Sep 8, 2021 13:51

AmazingK: Nov 30, 2013; You are speaking with the Digimon Emperor!

Bronze Fonz posted:

Why would you need such an organization instead of, you know, just believing those things?

You see in the past, Omnists had no need for an organization as it was held as more of a personal belief that was loosely defined and certainly, there were no scriptures that anyone held sacred. But the Omnist Messiah (OMNI) showed us the way to becoming true fundamentalists with a strict and literal interpretation of the sacred texts of every religion in the known world(s). How can you believe in Ares... Scientology... Gilgamesh... UFOs... Transhumanism... and of course... Voodoo Deities without the Messiahs?

The Omnist Messiah came here, to our realm, our place, our land, our time, our homes, our mouths, and he feed them all... all the truths that we could handle and then some. And before we knew it... we had been stuffed full of fact after fact after fact that dispelled the disbelief that bewildered not only us... but all the Omnists and Omnism(s) around us... until we gagged and vomited. What? Vomited what you ask? Not garbage... but realities.

He told us... to form the organization. And he is the mediator between God and men (and by sacred law... God, men, gods, animals, extraterrestrials, multidimensional beings, cosmic entities, etc...) and so his will is our way; only...

# ? Sep 8, 2021 14:37

Chip McFuck: Jul 24, 2007; We droppin' like a comet and this Vulcan tried to Spock it/These Martians tried to do it, but knew they couldn't cop it

Assuming this isn't an elaborate troll, how is it possible to have a fundamentalist reading of all religious texts? Isn't that, in itself, a contradiction? How can one text be taken as literal if it denies the existence of other gods that are present in other texts?

# ? Sep 8, 2021 17:33

Canine Blues Arooo: Jan 7, 2008; when you think about it...i'm the first girl you ever spent the night with; Grimey Drawer

Gas

# ? Sep 9, 2021 05:59

AmazingK: Nov 30, 2013; You are speaking with the Digimon Emperor!

Chip McFuck posted:

Assuming this isn't an elaborate troll, how is it possible to have a fundamentalist reading of all religious texts? Isn't that, in itself, a contradiction? How can one text be taken as literal if it denies the existence of other gods that are present in other texts?

I have a Master's in Theology and have been a fundamentalist my entire life. I was born into the Buddhist Sangha where my great grandfather is the founder of Vietnam's Linh Son Pagoda and was raised by monks from an early age in the southern provinces of which that temple, which still honors my family's patriarch, has today... 18 disciples who have committed their lives into the Buddhist Sangha and the study of the noble paths.

How can I be a troll?...

So to answer your question...

"Thou shalt have no other gods before me" - Ten Commandments, Exodus 20:2 Deuteronomy 5:6 (Hebrew Bible)

This scripture, a sacred text, clearly states that even Moses himself believes in the existence of other gods. You shall not WORSHIP the other gods, not that he said "THERE ARE NO OTHER GODS WHO EXIST". Point me in the direction of the specific written word that you are referring to.

Because at this point... you're making stuff up out of thin air and I see no texts which support your claim for if I were to see them... I would easily refute them with fact.

# ? Sep 9, 2021 07:40

AmazingK: Nov 30, 2013; You are speaking with the Digimon Emperor!

Canine Blues Arooo posted:

Gas

Reason?

# ? Sep 9, 2021 07:40

Phil Moscowitz: Feb 19, 2007; If blood be the price of admiralty,
Lord God, we ha' paid in full!

AmazingK posted:

"Thou shalt have no other gods before me" - Ten Commandments, Exodus 20:2 Deuteronomy 5:6 (Hebrew Bible)

This scripture, a sacred text, clearly states that even Moses himself believes in the existence of other gods. You shall not WORSHIP the other gods, not that he said "THERE ARE NO OTHER GODS WHO EXIST". Point me in the direction of the specific written word that you are referring to.

Because at this point... you're making stuff up out of thin air and I see no texts which support your claim for if I were to see them... I would easily refute them with fact.

أَشْهَدُ أَنْ لَا إِلَٰهَ إِلَّا ٱللَّٰهُ وَأَشْهَدُ أَنَّ مُحَمَّدًا رَسُولُ ٱللَّٰهِ

# ? Sep 9, 2021 12:42

joat mon: Oct 15, 2009; I am the master of my lamp;
I am the captain of my tub.

יְהוָה אֱלֹהֵינוּ יְהוָה אֶחָֽד׃

# ? Sep 9, 2021 13:05

P-Mack: Nov 10, 2007

so is this just a less funny Church of the Subgenius

# ? Sep 9, 2021 13:21

joat mon: Oct 15, 2009; I am the master of my lamp;
I am the captain of my tub.

P-Mack posted:

so is this just a less funny Church of the Subgenius

I was thinking a joyless discordianism.

# ? Sep 9, 2021 13:25

Phil Moscowitz: Feb 19, 2007; If blood be the price of admiralty,
Lord God, we ha' paid in full!

What is the Omni Messiah�s real name, OP

# ? Sep 9, 2021 13:48

blarzgh: Apr 14, 2009; SNITCHIN' RANDY; Grimey Drawer

When is the systematic murder of all your followers?

# ? Sep 9, 2021 14:03

AmazingK: Nov 30, 2013; You are speaking with the Digimon Emperor!

Phil Moscowitz posted:

What is the Omni Messiah�s real name, OP

Tell me your real name and I will do the same.

# ? Sep 9, 2021 14:16

blarzgh: Apr 14, 2009; SNITCHIN' RANDY; Grimey Drawer

AmazingK posted:

I guess only now did I come out of denial from my doctor's diagnosis. To start I was diagnosed with Bipolar I disorder, which I'm managing fine. If anyone asks that's all I say, but my doctor says-

But my full diagnosis reads: "Permanent Bipolar I disorder with psychosis primarily with drug and alcohol addiction. Also diagnosed with chronic major depression disorder which accounts for the drug and alcohol use. All 3 disorders have been present since around 16 or 17 years old. Psychosis which was originally misdiagnosed as schizophrenia appears to only effect patient when either using drugs and alcohol and possibly lack of sleep and the depression." (This was done at a special testing center which included interviews of all my family and friends since I was 16 for an entire month and I had to go through 3 different doctors and go through like every medical test who all verified so I guess it is as accurate as fact.)

Prognosis was: "Patient can continue normal daily activities and work provided he abstains from drugs and alcohol, which patient is at very high risk of due to the co-morbid depression. Does not appear to be dangerous during psychosis, patient becomes confused, lost, and loses track of time and awareness."

So anyways I take seroquel XR, and I have to visit the doctor every month not a big deal. They said by law if I miss an appointment they're supposed to go look for me, since I'm disabled or something like that. No biggie.

The main issue is that apparently my doctor, and I have a team of doctors, say I cannot have even a single drink FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE. They said my physiology is "not normal" so I can't drink do drugs or any of that good stuff. I'm in a dual program where it's mental health and drug rehab and every time I visit the doctor the first thing they ask me is, so how much have you been drinking? Hahaha.

Well it was funny to me, but now I realize that if I go get wasted for a couple of nights it's almost on cue every single time I'll lose a day from the "psychosis" which is just me sitting in a dark room for a day depressed and I have no idea what happens until I snap out of the "psychosis" state usually just a day or so. Now I understand why I have I have a required medical file for tracking down to how many drinks I've had every single week.

Most of the time I'm pretty chill, but man since high school I've always had the worst attendance at school and work. Not to say most of this isn't my own fault since I am pretty much always out "partying". I did find it incredible that they could pointpoint the disorder back to my teen years. Which makes perfect sense since I was the "pot smoker" and "always drinking" guy since 16/17. Apparently it's genetic or something and manifests at around that age, which makes perfect sense because I spent the summer of 17 years old alone in my room depressed. I just sat in my room for the entire summer. At least now I knew why! Haha depression/bipolar/thingy.

I guess denial of my full medical downfalls kinda made sense. I go to a special doctors office and they said eventually maybe like 6 months or so depending on how good I do they will be transferring me to a different regular doctor's office. I was confused as to why I had to leave, but they said I'm in the "special office/state office" for treating only the most severe cases. Hahaha, I had been wondering why every single other person that comes in there is really weird, talking to themselves, or flat out crazy. Like they are the crazy homeless people essentially.

Well the good news: My doctors said I am one of the "special" cases because normally a triple/quadruple diagnosis like mine means most are completely 100% disabled from working and require like caregivers. They also said there's a scale between extreme and mild cases, and I got put in the extreme.

I guess additional good news: my doctors told me if I ever have any issues with work or school, the doctors office itself would call them on my behalf! The funny and I guess really crazy thing is, because I had scored so high at every level of school and had been very successful with work- It's "implied" that any issues like "failure" "being late" "missing work" or "not passing class" is a direct result of my medical disorder which is also a verified disability. The doctors office actually called my family members and my friends to and asked each person really personal questions and a full history of my life FROM THEM. It is a little amusing, because everybody said I am "a beast", "always the top student", "hard worker and very accomplished", along with my brother telling the doctor that: "yes, my brother does do drugs and drink a lot since he was 16 and he will either sit in a room by himself after, or go out for days and come back in the same clothes randomly. All the time." and my father told them "he will go to the store or something, doesn't matter, we have no idea when he is coming back. it is pretty normal for him to disappear for a week in the same clothes, usually partying, on a monthly basis with no explanation." SO MY DOCTORs KNOWS EVERYTHING ABOUT ME WHICH IS REALLY EMBARASSING (they keep records of my finances, schedule, friends/family, down to what classes I'm taking- which I guess is pretty cool) =\

So in other words: Because I have had a consistent record of success and completed things with no issues, it's almost illegal for me to fail hahaha. I have no idea what this mental health thingy I'm in is, but some govt thing or something I really have no idea but everybody is nice and the patient are crazy/talking to themselves for 1 step away. I think I am the only person there with a job/school haha.

Anyways for my question for the forums after my long rant:

I'm not sure what to do with my situation. I am really cool with my doctors and staff, and pretty much every single time I come in for an appointment each month- They ask me "how's your drinking, drugs, and partying" and I always say: "uhhh none maybe just a little" and they reply everytime: "you're lying like always. you have to take this more seriously Amazing. every time you use things like "perscription adderall and binge drinking" you run the risk of "drug induced psychosis" which everyone has a risk (meth addicts going crazy) of "but my risks are exponentially higher" and "other bad things" and then my doctors give me a lecture and I say sorry and half-laugh and they shake their heads again.

I have heard that I might have to go on more than just Seroquel for the depression that causes drinking and relapse. I don't know if I should go on the "zoloft nation" or all the other drugs. I also don't know what to say. The issue is that I am recommended to engage in normal social activities as and socialize as often as possible- because apparently the depression is aside from the expected ups and downs: "likely" from "loneliness" since 16.

Serious question: are you taking care of yourself?

# ? Sep 9, 2021 14:25

joat mon: Oct 15, 2009; I am the master of my lamp;
I am the captain of my tub.

Phil Moscowitz posted:

What is the Omni Messiah’s real name, OP

I was hoping for Kvardek Du,

AmazingK posted:

Tell me your real name and I will do the same.

But I guess it's Pride.

# ? Sep 9, 2021 14:27

blarzgh: Apr 14, 2009; SNITCHIN' RANDY; Grimey Drawer

joat mon posted:

But I guess it's Pride.

I'll be Lust

# ? Sep 9, 2021 14:32

Phil Moscowitz: Feb 19, 2007; If blood be the price of admiralty,
Lord God, we ha' paid in full!

AmazingK posted:

Tell me your real name and I will do the same.

Ok Tim

# ? Sep 9, 2021 14:41

AmazingK: Nov 30, 2013; You are speaking with the Digimon Emperor!

blarzgh posted:

When is the systematic murder of all your followers?

# ? Sep 9, 2021 15:16

Chip McFuck: Jul 24, 2007; We droppin' like a comet and this Vulcan tried to Spock it/These Martians tried to do it, but knew they couldn't cop it

AmazingK posted:

I have a Master's in Theology and have been a fundamentalist my entire life. I was born into the Buddhist Sangha where my great grandfather is the founder of Vietnam's Linh Son Pagoda and was raised by monks from an early age in the southern provinces of which that temple, which still honors my family's patriarch, has today... 18 disciples who have committed their lives into the Buddhist Sangha and the study of the noble paths.

How can I be a troll?...

So to answer your question...

"Thou shalt have no other gods before me" - Ten Commandments, Exodus 20:2 Deuteronomy 5:6 (Hebrew Bible)

This scripture, a sacred text, clearly states that even Moses himself believes in the existence of other gods. You shall not WORSHIP the other gods, not that he said "THERE ARE NO OTHER GODS WHO EXIST". Point me in the direction of the specific written word that you are referring to.

Because at this point... you're making stuff up out of thin air and I see no texts which support your claim for if I were to see them... I would easily refute them with fact.

Isaiah 45:5 "I am the LORD, and there is no other, besides me there is no god; I equip you, though you do not know me."
Deuteronomy 4:35 -'You were shown these things so that you might know that the LORD is God; besides him there is no other.
Deuteronomy 32:39 '"See now that I myself am he! There is no God besides me. I put to death and I bring to life, I have wounded and I will heal, and no one can deliver out of my hand."
Isaiah 43:10 "You are my witness," declares the LORD, "and my servant whom I have chosen, that you may know and believe me and understand that I am he. Before me no god was formed, nor shall there be any after me."
Galatians 1:8-9 But even if we or an angel from heaven should preach to you a gospel contrary to the one we preached to you, let him be accursed. As we have said before, so now I say again: If anyone is preaching to you a gospel contrary to the one you received, let him be accursed.

All that being said, this conversation just makes me sad. Assuming this is real, you remind me a lot of my grandfather who started a cult and believed himself to be descended from the twelve disciples and the reincarnation of Jesus - he argued in a similar way when it came to theology. He even registered with the government and everything, too. I hope you're doing ok and getting whatever help you need.

# ? Sep 9, 2021 16:12

Nice piece of fish: Jan 29, 2008; Ultra Carp

OP, can I interest you in a hiking trip for awareness of your issue?

You'll need a cart, a sign, raisins, a co2 powered pistol, buck knife, light axe and bear spray and you should be all set.

A good starting route would be LA to Florida.

# ? Sep 9, 2021 17:05

OnlyBans: Sep 21, 2021; by sebmojo

Praise be the Omnissiah.

It has been almost 15 years since I communed with the Omnissiah. I was working in a metal hood, washing some cells with saline solution. It was a German device, so it was DC and very very old. You know that yellow plastic that computers used to be made from? Not the cream stuff that fades to yellow, like in the '90s. The slightly shiny yellow stuff from the '80s. Also, I swear, it looked like it had been stained by cigarette smoke. When was the last time they allowed smoking in labs? Anyway, I'm clumsy and spilled my saline solution and it hit the ancient motor. The electricity flowed through the metal hood and the saline solution and into my body. All my muscles tensed up. But to everyone else, it just looked like I was working in the hood. Thirty minutes of unimaginable agony, locked into my body.

Thankfully, someone needed the centrifuge and bumped into me when they realized something was very wrong. So, they knocked me free from the hood with a plastic broom. But for those 30 minutes, I was one with electricity and one with the Omnissiah.

Praise be the Omnissiah.

# ? Oct 2, 2021 05:48

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# ? May 9, 2024 03:57

DandyLion: Jun 24, 2010; disrespectul Deciever

OnlyBans posted:

Praise be the Omnissiah.

It has been almost 15 years since I communed with the Omnissiah. I was working in a metal hood, washing some cells with saline solution. It was a German device, so it was DC and very very old. You know that yellow plastic that computers used to be made from? Not the cream stuff that fades to yellow, like in the '90s. The slightly shiny yellow stuff from the '80s. Also, I swear, it looked like it had been stained by cigarette smoke. When was the last time they allowed smoking in labs? Anyway, I'm clumsy and spilled my saline solution and it hit the ancient motor. The electricity flowed through the metal hood and the saline solution and into my body. All my muscles tensed up. But to everyone else, it just looked like I was working in the hood. Thirty minutes of unimaginable agony, locked into my body.

Thankfully, someone needed the centrifuge and bumped into me when they realized something was very wrong. So, they knocked me free from the hood with a plastic broom. But for those 30 minutes, I was one with electricity and one with the Omnissiah.

Praise be the Omnissiah.

This guy communes with the motive force, a true believer!

# ? Oct 4, 2021 15:32

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