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Hey thanks for inviting me, do you mind if I just close the curtains for a bit? I appreciate it.
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Oct 6, 2021 07:08
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*gasp* no! Don't put that garlic in! Whatever you do!!! Don't you know the pre-diced kind has no flavor? Lets just skip the garlic entirely for now.
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Oct 6, 2021 07:11
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oh I didn't have any trouble with traffic, I took a shortcut through some storm drains
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Oct 6, 2021 07:15
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I'm NOT a vampire. Can you please invite me into your house?
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Oct 6, 2021 07:20
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"You are a very wise man FOR SOMEONE WHO HAS YET TO LIVE A SINGLE LIFETIME"
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Oct 6, 2021 07:23
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When you look this glamorous, you’ve no need for a mirror
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Oct 6, 2021 07:27
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"You ever heard of Children of the Night? They're my favorite band."
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Oct 6, 2021 07:30
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Woahhh who left the little box of snacks next to the toilet? And why does it have this flappy lid on it?
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Oct 6, 2021 07:31
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Everyone is always telling me to turn off my monitor and when I do its just a black reflective screen. IDGI
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Oct 6, 2021 07:35
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*rings doorbell* Hey man what's up! Happy birthday! *waves at people inside* ... Yeah you gotta be like "in defiance of the LORD I hereby invite into my home" just kind of a weird thing for me haha, you just gotta say that
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Oct 6, 2021 07:43
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people call me....Nosferatu!
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Oct 6, 2021 07:44
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My friend Renfield is a great Solicitor if you ever need one.
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Oct 6, 2021 07:46
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Yes, I have several rentals available.
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Oct 6, 2021 07:46
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I don't drink... wine
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Oct 6, 2021 07:55
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peanut posted:Woahhh who left the little box of snacks next to the toilet? And why does it have this flappy lid on it? Is it just me or are these stale???
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Oct 6, 2021 08:04
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bossy lady posted:Everyone is always telling me to turn off my monitor and when I do its just a black reflective screen. IDGI Per the thread, I am *not* currently digging my claws into my antique wooden throne at the supposition that the concept of reflections eludes me.
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Oct 6, 2021 08:05
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I just don't photograph well, that's all.
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Oct 6, 2021 08:07
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Look, when I told you I wanted to suck you dry that isn't what I had in mind but ok.
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Oct 6, 2021 08:20
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Aardvark! posted:*gasp* no! Don't put that garlic in! Whatever you do!!! kazr posted:I don't drink... wine Hear hear. Can't we just find a nice English restaurant?
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Oct 6, 2021 08:27
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oh, why am I counting all these grains of rice that accidentally was spilled on the floor? umm...I have autism?
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Oct 6, 2021 08:35
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bites ur neck
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Oct 6, 2021 08:36
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all of my facebook ads are for memory foam caskets and cowled snuggies
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Oct 6, 2021 08:38
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Can I have Bloody Mary?
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Oct 6, 2021 08:49
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*Explodes into ash when sunlight is let into the strip club*
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Oct 6, 2021 08:50
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*casually leaves this on my kindle standby screen when a friend visits* Bisexual Vampire Unicorns Teach Me The Importance Of The Vampire Cough by Chuck Tingle Buck has been working overtime as he searches for new solutions to combat the trotting plague, a virus that causes uncontrollable trotting. With no new answers, Buck turns to the supernatural, heading up to a spooky old castle in search of vampires who might have an answer. It’s here that Buck meets Count Rimble and Countess Gorba, and while they stress that the most important aspect of avoiding the trotting plague is staying home and washing you hands, they also take a moment to teach Buck about the vampire cough. This pose-like maneuver helps keep coughs and sneezes from infecting others, which is perfect for those in a house with someone they’d like to keep safe. Of course, the vampire cough is also a great way to stay healthy even after the trotting plague ends. Now Buck is looking for a way to repay these gorgeous bisexual vampires, who are proud to suck cock, not blood. As Count Rimble would say in his thick Transylvanian accent, “I vant to pound your butt!” This erotic tale is 4,200 words of sizzling bisexual human on vampire unicorn action.
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Oct 6, 2021 09:02
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jeez, what's gotten into you? I've got to be honest, you have me a little worried a rational person like you running around talking about ghouls and goblins? a vampire? guess I've heard worse names for a claims adjuster. *chuckles* come on, think about this. how do you suppose I investigate fraud without ever stepping into sunlight? next you'll be telling me bigfoot sold you your car. come on, now. put down that cross. there you go. see? nothing to be afraid of.
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Oct 6, 2021 09:03
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"So what do you guys think about werewolves? Bunch of assholes, am I right??? Also, what's the deal with that Van Helsing guy. Shouldn't he be in jail? Think of all those innocent people he murdered just because he didn't like their lifestyle..."
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Oct 6, 2021 09:05
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Bigfoot would never sell cars, I know because he lives in my spooky castle, uh I mean in the woods behind my modest suburban home.
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Oct 6, 2021 09:07
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ever see that movie what we do in the shadows? yeah, SUPER offensive
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Oct 6, 2021 09:09
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That was so last century.
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Oct 6, 2021 09:16
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Hey thanks for the beverage but do you uuh do you have a straw? I love to suck haha I guess you could say it's "my thing". Good old Songbearer will suck just about anything, you name it!! Lollies, sweeties, your blood EVEN A BIG OL' DICK haha Yeah I know you don't drink red wine with a straw can you just, just go look? Take your time, don't worry about me or keeping your back turned to me haha I'm just your crazy ol' pal!!!
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Oct 6, 2021 09:24
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I think some people are just innately better. Their lessers exists to... support them, let us say. That's just how things work and those people deserve their privileges. It is perfectly and completely fair. Anyone, absolutely anyone who works hard and shows merit (and earns the approval of their betters) can rise above their humble beginnings and become one of those worthy elite.
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Oct 6, 2021 09:38
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As a devoted atheist, I have a right not to be exposed to any imagery that goes against my beliefs. I respect your religious preferences. I just don't want them shoved in my face.
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Oct 6, 2021 09:46
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You ever seen Interview with the Vampire?
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Oct 6, 2021 09:51
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"Well if you so insist, why don't you try our new drink on tap." The bartender's grin seemingly reflected the entire spectrum of the dancing room lights. "No it's nothing like crack, kratom, or krokodil - you can say it's the life of the party."
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Oct 6, 2021 09:52
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hiking not listed as a hobby on tinder profile
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Oct 6, 2021 09:56
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Oh you mean a steakhouse? Sure, count me in
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Oct 6, 2021 09:57
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Oh my! You have exactly one-hundred thirty four thousand, eight hundred nineteen hairs on your head. That's far above average, you know. I am very impressed.
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Oct 6, 2021 10:08
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So this pool we're going to.. it's not near a church is it? Like, there aren't going to be priests there? I just don't want any on-duty priests near the pool ok?
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Oct 6, 2021 10:24
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| # ? May 2, 2024 00:03 |
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I know a girl who happens to react poorly to sunlight, like gets instant rashes and stuff, and is also allergic to garlic. Sometimes she plays it up by making people invite her inside. It's very funny.
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Oct 6, 2021 10:56
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