- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 11, 2024 10:32
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- Zurtilik
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The Biggest Brain in Guardia
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Animals come to me when I sing. I guess I got a good voice!
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Nov 10, 2021 16:53
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- ErrorInvalidUser
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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a hero that's massively declarative and massively dumb. our dear leader... mein furher....
Somebody fucked around with this message at 10:41 on Nov 11, 2021
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Nov 10, 2021 17:00
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- Buttchocks
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No, I like my hat, thanks.
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Wherever I go, old people come up to me and say they have been waiting for my arrival so they might see me with their own eyes before they finally pass on from this world. Am I destined to be a hospice nurse?
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Nov 10, 2021 17:30
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- take the moon
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by sebmojo
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lol
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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Nov 10, 2021 18:05
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- Macnult
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"hey doc my apologies, i meant to call you yesterday. i guess things are better? i mean, the only issue i was having is still happening - getting approached by panicked old men in robes who are all telling me the same thing. yeah. hellfires, calling me a savior, yadda yadda. i, uh, i- i mean yeah i guess i could turn on the news right now but honestly should we up my dosage?"
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Nov 10, 2021 20:23
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- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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"so yeah I've been coming to the lake everyday now for a month and this lady keeps sticking her arm out and holding up this sword. but I never get to see any titties so each day I try to coax her out a little more but so far... no loving titties... like what the gently caress?"
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Nov 10, 2021 21:23
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- alnilam
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Walking down the street minding my business, evil villain is magically smiting all the best soldiers down and suddenly his magic bolt bounces harmlessly off me. He looks confused and tries again. "Nice try dingus. lol smite much?" I keep walking. Best to ignore those types imo
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Nov 10, 2021 21:38
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- alnilam
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It's you... The hero of Kvatch!!
Kvatch? Man yeah i was there once, weeeeird place.
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Nov 10, 2021 21:40
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- Buttchocks
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No, I like my hat, thanks.
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Sure, I guess that giant rock outcropping does resemble me if I were holding a mighty sword and smiting the forces of darkness. Apophenia is a funny thing sometimes.
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Nov 10, 2021 22:41
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- aldantefax
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ALWAYS BE MECHFISHIN'
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who, me?
in this economy!?
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Nov 11, 2021 00:45
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- google THIS
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Yeah, I'm pretty sure my heterochromia, bright blue hair, and ability to catch arrows in flight with my bare hands came from an obscure great uncle of mine. And I'm positive that my passing resemblance to the Shadow King is coincidental.
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Nov 11, 2021 01:46
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- canyoneer
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I only have canyoneyes for you
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hahahahaha how is being slain during a quest real hahahaha adventurer just call on the spirits of your ancestors and smite your enemies with all the combined powers of the elements hahaha
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Nov 11, 2021 03:06
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- empty whippet box
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by Fluffdaddy
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wow, that's a cool sword in that stone. haha, wow, they really can't get it out! I don't want to mess with it, it's not mine. Someone probably worked hard to get it in there. Anyway, back to ploughing this here field.
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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Nov 11, 2021 03:35
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- FutonForensic
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the Avatar? no no, WebMD says im bipolar
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Nov 11, 2021 06:26
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- JimsonTheBetrayer
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Game's over, and fuck you Jimson. It's not my fault that you guys couldn't get your shit together by deadline. No one gets access to docs because I don't fucking care anymore, I hope you all enjoyed ruining my game, and there won't be another.
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This is the fourth sword that hums to me in the woods I've found this week. If it wasn't for the long trip into the city I'd set up a business selling them.
☆♤♤Gayer_Than_life♤♤☆
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Nov 11, 2021 08:14
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- WithoutTheFezOn
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Oh no
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I don’t get it.
The “Help Wanted” sign has been in the window for months, but Ms. Turner keeps saying all the positions that match my skills are filled.
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Nov 12, 2021 01:16
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- empty whippet box
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by Fluffdaddy
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*yawn* another night, another dream about a blue-eyed girl in a desert, staring at me peircingly. kinda getting old, really.
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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Nov 12, 2021 01:22
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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on the night you were born the moon, though full, went dark for a moment. the stars in the sky blinked out, candles and lamps extinguished, it was as if all the light in the universe was pouring into you, my son. it is time you learned of your destiny.
sure yes, i will feed the goats.
son, that is
I'LL FEED THEM SO WELL, FATHER!
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Nov 12, 2021 01:43
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- Bright Bart
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False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped
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The wizard tree thing did tell me I need to head to Goldentown in order to avenge my village but honestly I'm making a decent living just cutting these bushes and taking the rupees I find.
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Nov 12, 2021 01:50
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- Buttchocks
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No, I like my hat, thanks.
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The recruiter said you want someone to close the gates of hell. I guess I could work the last shift if I get paid a little more. So is "Gates of Hell' a biker bar, then?
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Nov 12, 2021 04:25
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- Farecoal
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There he go
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Nov 12, 2021 05:16
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- take the moon
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by sebmojo
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The elders always said I would save my people,  AND TODAY I AM SAVING ALL OF YOU HUNDREDS OF COPPERS WITH THIS BLOWOUT SALE!!! THATS RIGHT COME ON DOWN TO SILVER-EYED ANATHIR'S PRE-OWNED DONKEY DEPOT WHERE I AM SLASHING PRICES LEFT AND RIGHT WITH THE SWORN SWORD OF MY ANCESTOR, ANTHOR THE LAWBRINGER!!! The orc tribes may be mustering at the Pass of Vastamar and strange shakings may rumble the earth BUT SILVER-EYED ANATHIR WILL NOT BE UNDERSOLD! No credit checks, financing guaranteed, and low interest rates but HURRY!!! The goblin raids on the Pastures of Plenty mean inventory is low and since the last of the Royal Guard left yesterday, these donkeys are guaranteed to be the fastest way out of Grundlewald! Warranteed to outrun the swiftest of Vastak's worg riders or your money back! GET YOURS BEFORE THEY ARE GONE TODAY!!!!
ahaha
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This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Nov 16, 2021 20:21
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- google THIS
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(long pause)
Ok but that could be taking about any one-eyed boy born by the light of the Witch's Moon who can command wolves and has a birthmark on his left calf shaped like the symbol of Mortica, Goddess of Uncertain Fate right?
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Nov 18, 2021 05:16
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- pixaal
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All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.
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One day a forum of resplendent blue and magnanimous purple shall be made and all within shall be chill.
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Nov 19, 2021 12:51
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- google THIS
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All right, it's sunny and a balmy 72 degrees today, not a drop of rain in the forecast. It's the perfect day to have my final showdown with
(thunder peals, sky instantly grows dark)
...Ok, maybe tomorrow
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Nov 26, 2021 20:42
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- Lock
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hardcore sound gets you hypah
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Look, Gary’s kinda a jerk and Professor Oak smells funny; can’t I just get a paper route instead?
https://giant.gfycat.com/ThoseAcrobaticCapybara.webm
so much love to vanisher for the winter '21 sig!
huge love to Tiny Myers for the fall '21 sig!
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Nov 27, 2021 19:31
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 11, 2024 10:32
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- Buttchocks
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No, I like my hat, thanks.
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That was weird. That bum in the park screaming nonsense about time loops and saving humanity came over and asked if I had any Choward's violet candies, then told me to "reverse the polarity when you go through the portal", whatever that means. Absolutely bizarre -- I thought I was the only person on earth who actually likes Choward's.
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Nov 27, 2021 22:08
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Nov 10, 2021 16:31
