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The Alchemist
Dec 12, 2010

Dumb Sex-Parrot posted:

hamster 1: head stuck between bars in cage, dont ask how idk
hamster 2: squeezed through bars in new hamster cage, got stuck behind the couch for a week, dont ask how idk
hamster 3: new and improved cage no longer a lethal hazard; killed in tragic hamster wheel accident
hamster 4: dog chewed on him
hamster 5: killed by hamster 6
hamster 6: absorbed hamster 5's essence and lived long and prosperous, died while trying to fit one too many hamsterpellets up his cheeks
hamster 7: lost in the vents, stunk the place up for a couple of days after his assumed death, still in there
hamster 8: found dead in his cage, foul play suspected. daughter feigns ignorance and claims innocence

Seems like they dont even want to live

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Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006

by Azathoth
I have a confession. I only read Hamlet once in the 8th grade and never saw or thought about it again nor have I seen the movie Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead I just think their names sound funny

HORSE-SLAUGHTERER
Nov 11, 2020

H O R S E - S L A U G H T E R E R
“Gobble my Stoppard,” he ordered, and fell on her in such a way as to bring this about

Powerful Katrinka
Oct 11, 2021

an admin fat fingered a permaban and all i got was this lousy av

Dumb Sex-Parrot posted:

hamster 1: head stuck between bars in cage, dont ask how idk
hamster 2: squeezed through bars in new hamster cage, got stuck behind the couch for a week, dont ask how idk
hamster 3: new and improved cage no longer a lethal hazard; killed in tragic hamster wheel accident
hamster 4: dog chewed on him
hamster 5: killed by hamster 6
hamster 6: absorbed hamster 5's essence and lived long and prosperous, died while trying to fit one too many hamsterpellets up his cheeks
hamster 7: lost in the vents, stunk the place up for a couple of days after his assumed death, still in there
hamster 8: found dead in his cage, foul play suspected. daughter feigns ignorance and claims innocence

The question was WHY do hamsters die, not how

The Alchemist
Dec 12, 2010

Borscht posted:

So they actually made this.

One of the direct to video sequels to the lion king "lion king 1 1/2" begins with timon and pumba as a black outlines in a theater mst3k style watching the original movie but fast forwarding to only their parts then proceeds to flashback to both of their origin stories and jumps around after that. Its actually not bad

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rQTDxbVfmaI

You Are A Werewolf
Apr 26, 2010

Black Gold!

Borscht posted:

So they actually made this.

One of the direct to video sequels to the lion king "lion king 1 1/2" begins with timon and pumba as a black outlines in a theater mst3k style watching the original movie but fast forwarding to only their parts then proceeds to flashback to both of their origin stories and jumps around after that. Its actually not bad

I’m creating a new timeline for The Lion King. Hear me out.

Everything up to Mufasa’s death and young Simba’s exile is real. Timon and Pumbaa are also real, but they happened upon Simba’s corpse out in the open instead of finding him barely clinging to life. They leave his body there since Timon is reluctant to even bury a lion, but Pumbaa, being a sympathetic warthog, creates an imaginary scenario where they rescue Simba and they all become friends, which is how we see “Hakuna Matata” played out.

Nala comes upon T&P one day while out on a hunt for food, kills them both instead of originally having Simba saving the day since he’s always been dead, and T&P arrive in the afterlife to view their memories MST3K style on a giant screen. Then, The Lion King 1 1/2 begins.

:boom:

The Alchemist
Dec 12, 2010

You Are A Elf posted:

[...]
and T&P arrive in the afterlife to view their memories MST3K style on a giant screen. Then, The Lion King 1 1/2 begins.

:boom:

if the Lion King 1 1/2 movie theater is afterlife, then the ending has pretty grim implications

You Are A Werewolf
Apr 26, 2010

Black Gold!

The entire Disneyverse is a hallucination of the Aracuan Bird, it seems.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHItXd6pXJE

I mean, look at it. Explains it all.

Bula Vinaka
Oct 21, 2020

beach side
Two good movies based on The Tempest:

Tempest (1982), directed by Paul Mazursky. Takes place in modern times. Shakespeare lines replaced with modern dialogue. No Blu-Ray, but can be purchased in HD from various streaming services (Amazon, Vudu, Apple TV). One of John Cassavetes last movies before his death.

Prospero's Books (1991), directed by Peter Greenaway. Uses Shakespeare lines, but does a kind of surreal mash-up that was actually meant to show off the capabilities of cutting edge video effects and video processing available at the time, which obviously wouldn't be fully experienced at the time on NTSC/PAL + VHS. It's still unfortunately not available on Blu-Ray except for a Japanese box set, which I don't own, so I don't know what the quality's like. It is available for rent / own on Amazon streaming.

Dumb Sex-Parrot
Dec 25, 2020

 
Absurd Pox Term
Rad Buxom Strep
     
Retard Ox Bumps
Borax Dumpster
     
Dares Box Trump

The Alchemist posted:

Seems like they dont even want to live

gonna give #6 the benefit of the doubt: he slew his rival and died from overeating, that's pretty hedonistic imo

You Are A Werewolf
Apr 26, 2010

Black Gold!

A good Shakespeare scene:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=82dYxF3sA8o

Anne Whateley
Feb 11, 2007
:unsmith: i like nice words

Bula Vinaka posted:

Prospero's Books (1991), directed by Peter Greenaway. Uses Shakespeare lines, but does a kind of surreal mash-up that was actually meant to show off the capabilities of cutting edge video effects and video processing available at the time, which obviously wouldn't be fully experienced at the time on NTSC/PAL + VHS. It's still unfortunately not available on Blu-Ray except for a Japanese box set, which I don't own, so I don't know what the quality's like. It is available for rent / own on Amazon streaming.
fyi this one includes so much nudity (very much including child nudity) and graphic weird sex that when I tried to watch it in my college library, I think I made it like 2 minutes in.

quote:

It is a very odd and surreal performance, with a lot of full frontal nudity of men and women, as well as graphic sexual content.

A woman loses her virginity, and we see the bloody and sexually explicit aftermath.

One animated scene of a bull copulating with a woman.

A very graphic scene of Caliban masturbating.

Very explicit and close-up shot of a woman's vagina while she is giving birth.

Barely an image on screen goes by without somebody being nude. The nudity includes full nudity of females and males, from young to old.

One brief albeit graphic scene of Stephano fantasizing about raping Miranda

Railing Kill
Nov 14, 2008

You are the first crack in the sheer face of god. From you it will spread.

Anne Whateley posted:

fyi this one includes so much nudity (very much including child nudity) and graphic weird sex that when I tried to watch it in my college library, I think I made it like 2 minutes in.

:yikes:

On a better note, there's a fantastic version of A Midsummer Night's Dream from 1969 or 1970 that I found on DVD when I was teaching the play in a college lit class. Hellen Mirren plays one of the lovers, Ian Holm plays Puck, and Judi Densch plays Titania. It has an appropriately hippy vibe for its time and that specific play, and as such there's some considerable nudity, especially from the fae characters.

This is all to say that I've seen a young Judi Densch nude. It was cool and good (but also the movie was pretty good, even aside from the dicks and tittays).

HORSE-SLAUGHTERER
Nov 11, 2020

H O R S E - S L A U G H T E R E R
i feel a bit guilty because every time i've tried to watch prospero's books i've fallen asleep, though it does have a quite hypnotic quality

8½ women is a good film to watch for weird greenaway sex poo poo though. about the first thing that happens is a guy has sex with his recently bereaved father

tractor man
Nov 11, 2021

OPs mom can shake my spear

Haptical Sales Slut
Mar 15, 2010

Age 18 to 49
IMO rittenhouse should not have killed these guys

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Nice Guy Patron
Jun 29, 2015

Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Sodomites

They were definitely loving.

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