Who Greedlightninged 2020-2: Somehow The Movies Returned

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Timby: Dec 23, 2006; Your mother!

Shageletic posted:

Haven't seen Darkman but The Shadow holds up (ten years ago lol)

Darkman is a much better Shadow movie than The Shadow is.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 04:42

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# ? May 9, 2024 02:19

Baron von Eevl: Jan 24, 2005; WHITE NOISE
GENERATOR
🔊😴

Darkman's really really good but it's a lot less of a pulp revival than the other 4.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 04:53

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

read that as Duckman

# ? Feb 12, 2023 05:06

Timby: Dec 23, 2006; Your mother!

Baron von Eevl posted:

Darkman's really really good but it's a lot less of a pulp revival than the other 4.

Darkman was made literally because Raimi couldn't get the rights to The Shadow.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 05:09

Big Mean Jerk: Jan 27, 2009; Well, of course I know him.
He's me.

You could arguably include the Brendan Fraser Mummy in that subgenre too, imo. Obviously it�s a remake of the Universal original and takes huge cues from Indiana Jones, but it�s more of the same two-fisted pulp adventure stuff.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 05:38

Timby: Dec 23, 2006; Your mother!

Big Mean Jerk posted:

You could arguably include the Brendan Fraser Mummy in that subgenre too, imo. Obviously it�s a remake of the Universal original and takes huge cues from Indiana Jones, but it�s more of the same two-fisted pulp adventure stuff.

Oh, man, I have a story about the Brendan Fraser Mummy.

So there was this girl I'd had a crush on since second grade, and we'd been friends since that era, and as 1999 came around we were both 15 and we flirted quite a bit (inasmuch as 15-year-olds know how to flirt).

She eventually asked me if I wanted to go see a movie with her, and she suggested The Mummy, since it was playing at the Ogden 6 (a second-run theater in the Chicago suburbs), and I eagerly accepted. She said she'd be there 10 minutes before the showtime. My sperm donor dropped me off at the theater, I bought a medium popcorn and two sodas since I knew she liked Cherry Coke. I kept waiting in the lobby for her until I heard the previews starting, so I went into the theater.

This theater raised the lights between the previews and the actual movie. When the lights were on, I stood up again, I looked around, and there she was, a few rows behind me.

With another guy.

15-year-old Timby was broken, and I've never revisited that movie since.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 05:45

Baron von Eevl: Jan 24, 2005; WHITE NOISE
GENERATOR
🔊😴

Timby posted:

Darkman was made literally because Raimi couldn't get the rights to The Shadow.

Sure but it's still a lot less of a pulp revival movie than the version of The Shadow we got. It's pretty squarely on the modern side of the pseudo-retro thing Batman 89 was doing, while the others were far on the other side.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 06:04

Big Mean Jerk: Jan 27, 2009; Well, of course I know him.
He's me.

Timby posted:

Oh, man, I have a story about the Brendan Fraser Mummy.

So there was this girl I'd had a crush on since second grade, and we'd been friends since that era, and as 1999 came around we were both 15 and we flirted quite a bit (inasmuch as 15-year-olds know how to flirt).

She eventually asked me if I wanted to go see a movie with her, and she suggested The Mummy, since it was playing at the Ogden 6 (a second-run theater in the Chicago suburbs), and I eagerly accepted. She said she'd be there 10 minutes before the showtime. My sperm donor dropped me off at the theater, I bought a medium popcorn and two sodas since I knew she liked Cherry Coke. I kept waiting in the lobby for her until I heard the previews starting, so I went into the theater.

This theater raised the lights between the previews and the actual movie. When the lights were on, I stood up again, I looked around, and there she was, a few rows behind me.

With another guy.

15-year-old Timby was broken, and I've never revisited that movie since.

God that�s rough.

I do think it�s worthy of a revisit though. Fraser and Weisz are a ton of fun and it definitely holds up aside from some wonky CGI and the unfortunately standard-for-the-time casting of someone playing an ethnicity they�re not.

Same with the Banderas Zorro. It�s not one I rewatch as often as the first Mummy, but it�s still pretty fun.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 08:27

Grendels Dad: Mar 5, 2011; Popular culture has passed you by.

Rachel Weisz deserves some kind of award for elevating stuff like The Mummy and Constantine. I love those movies and it's in no small part due to her performance.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 09:37

Maxwell Lord: Dec 12, 2008; I am drowning.
There is no sign of land.
You are coming down with me, hand in unlovable hand.

And I hope you die.

I hope we both die.; Grimey Drawer

I just fell in love with her in The Mummy. Evie is ridiculously endearing.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 09:42

claw game handjob: Mar 27, 2007; pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING

Timby posted:

Oh, man, I have a story about the Brendan Fraser Mummy.

Allow me to make you feel better with a story which was happening at roughly the same time. I can never think of the movie Armageddon without thinking of the most pathetic dude I ever knew in high school.

He was trying to date this girl who he had gone to church with for years, because both of them had hit puberty now and okay, that means maybe we can hold hands and do things. Now, she was very clearly not into him. But she knew he was into her. And so she basically kept him on the saddest, most visible leash via a VHS copy of Armageddon, where he owned it, and she said she wanted to borrow it. But he'd have to hold it for her during classes, because her purse didn't have room for a tape in it. Every day, for most of a year, he would try to find her and give her the tape before classes ended, and she'd push it off but say he should keep it so she could come get it later, and through the year she had multiple "boy friends, but not boyfriends" that he was entirely willing to accept the logic of.

It was the saddest scene and he never listened to any of us going "my guy, look anywhere else", because they had history and she said she wanted to watch the movie, you idiots!

# ? Feb 12, 2023 10:20

AceOfFlames: Oct 9, 2012

Now I'm picturing some teen clutching an Armageddon tape alone in a school hallway while "Don't Want To Miss a Thing" plays. It's both hilarious and tragic.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 11:14

Failed Imagineer: Sep 22, 2018

Timby posted:

My sperm donor dropped me off at the theater.

Nice of him to take such an interest in his donations.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 11:55

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

secretly best girl posted:

Allow me to make you feel better with a story which was happening at roughly the same time. I can never think of the movie Armageddon without thinking of the most pathetic dude I ever knew in high school.

He was trying to date this girl who he had gone to church with for years, because both of them had hit puberty now and okay, that means maybe we can hold hands and do things. Now, she was very clearly not into him. But she knew he was into her. And so she basically kept him on the saddest, most visible leash via a VHS copy of Armageddon, where he owned it, and she said she wanted to borrow it. But he'd have to hold it for her during classes, because her purse didn't have room for a tape in it. Every day, for most of a year, he would try to find her and give her the tape before classes ended, and she'd push it off but say he should keep it so she could come get it later, and through the year she had multiple "boy friends, but not boyfriends" that he was entirely willing to accept the logic of.

It was the saddest scene and he never listened to any of us going "my guy, look anywhere else", because they had history and she said she wanted to watch the movie, you idiots!

every day i wake up and ask her if she wants to open palm slap-

# ? Feb 12, 2023 12:45

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

High school is just full of psychotic poo poo in retrospect.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 12:47

Feldegast42: Oct 29, 2011; COMMENCE THE RITE OF SHITPOSTING

Big Mean Jerk posted:

God that�s rough.

I do think it�s worthy of a revisit though. Fraser and Weisz are a ton of fun and it definitely holds up aside from some wonky CGI and the unfortunately standard-for-the-time casting of someone playing an ethnicity they�re not.

Same with the Banderas Zorro. It�s not one I rewatch as often as the first Mummy, but it�s still pretty fun.

The CG in Mummy Returns is so bad it loops around into being kind of awesome. It helps that for all its many faults its The Rock's sorta kinda first big onscreeen role.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 15:44

Neo Rasa: Mar 8, 2007; Everyone should play DUKE games.

Grendels Dad posted:

Rachel Weisz deserves some kind of award for elevating stuff like The Mummy and Constantine. I love those movies and it's in no small part due to her performance.

It's like how she's in Death Machine for literally two seconds and has like one line but elevates it because of this look lol

# ? Feb 12, 2023 16:54

Big Mean Jerk: Jan 27, 2009; Well, of course I know him.
He's me.

Death Machine is a bizarre movie but it�s kinda worth watching for Brad Dourif acting like he�s a serial killer version of the bad guy from Hackers.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 17:28

Neo Rasa: Mar 8, 2007; Everyone should play DUKE games.

Big Mean Jerk posted:

Death Machine is a bizarre movie but it�s kinda worth watching for Brad Dourif acting like he�s a serial killer version of the bad guy from Hackers.

I love it, I kind of wish there was a, another cut of it? The initial video release in the US is barely coherent and kind of crap because of it. The longest version available now I loving love but it is ABSOLUTELY a bit indulgent and slow at points so I get why it doesn't click some people. But it's also the version that like, has the actual context for why anything is happening or who anyone is lol. Amusingly said most recent version is even a little shorter than the longest cut that ever got released but I think that was only in Spain, it's like 2 and a half hours long :wtf:

Neo Rasa fucked around with this message at 17:43 on Feb 12, 2023

# ? Feb 12, 2023 17:41

Big Mean Jerk: Jan 27, 2009; Well, of course I know him.
He's me.

Neo Rasa posted:

I love it, I kind of wish there was a, another cut of it? The initial video release in the US is barely coherent and kind of crap because of it. The longest version available now I loving love but it is ABSOLUTELY a bit indulgent and slow at points so I get why it doesn't click some people. But it's also the version that like, has the actual context for why anything is happening or who anyone is lol. Amusingly said most recent version is even a little shorter than the longest cut that ever got released but I think that was only in Spain, it's like 2 and a half hours long

I�m pretty sure that�s the same cut I watched then, and yeah, it is absolutely like an hour too long but I have no idea what you�d really cut to trim it down. You could maybe get it just under two hours and still make sense, but even that�s a serious ask for what should be a schlocky 95-minute premise.

# ? Feb 12, 2023 17:47

Timby: Dec 23, 2006; Your mother!

The sequel to Plane has been announced.

The title?

SHIP.

# ? Feb 13, 2023 21:57

AceOfFlames: Oct 9, 2012

Looking forward to Train, Car and Bike.

# ? Feb 13, 2023 22:26

Pirate Jet: May 2, 2010

Plane is actually pretty fun fwiw, totally worth a watch when it hits streaming.

# ? Feb 13, 2023 23:10

The MSJ: May 17, 2010

Ship will probably be Captain Phillip but with more pirates dead and exploded.

# ? Feb 13, 2023 23:35

Lid: Feb 18, 2005; And the mercy seat is awaiting,
And I think my head is burning,
And in a way I'm yearning,
To be done with all this measuring of proof.
An eye for an eye
And a tooth for a tooth,
And anyway I told the truth,
And I'm not afraid to die.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6UZsVeWD--I

Edgy Homeward Bound

# ? Feb 13, 2023 23:39

Cacator: Aug 6, 2005; You're quite good at turning me on.

AceOfFlames posted:

Looking forward to Train, Car and Bike.

Personally, I'm a big fan of Noun.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 00:08

dr_rat: Jun 4, 2001

When they hit Pogo stick, everyone knows they've gone to far.
Can't have a two word transportation title, even if it is the eight in the series. That's just loving with the formula to much.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 00:13

I AM GRANDO: Aug 20, 2006

Cacator posted:

Personally, I'm a big fan of Noun.

I�m a big fan of the Hammer classic Verb the Noun of Title Monster.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 00:18

The MSJ: May 17, 2010

dr_rat posted:

When they hit Pogo stick, everyone knows they've gone to far.
Can't have a two word transportation title, even if it is the eight in the series. That's just loving with the formula to much.

In the 9th movie they will go to space. People hate it for shilling Elon Musk.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 00:25

I AM GRANDO: Aug 20, 2006

Pogo Stick 2: Pogo Ball

Pogo 2tick: Pogo Ball

# ? Feb 14, 2023 00:47

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

Pirate Jet posted:

Plane is actually pretty fun fwiw, totally worth a watch when it hits streaming.

it was...fine? Once the mercs show up it's kinda easy mode

# ? Feb 14, 2023 03:15

RC and Moon Pie: May 5, 2011

Lid posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6UZsVeWD--I

Edgy Homeward Bound

There was a made for TV horror movie about bad cats that was also called Strays.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QagMqrxsMMo

I remember seeing a few minutes of it eons ago. One of the cats had territorially pissed on clothes in a closet.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 05:23

Cool Kids Club Soda: Aug 20, 2010; 😎❄️🌃🥤🧋🍹👌💯

Cacator posted:

Personally, I'm a big fan of Noun.

I'm very pro-Noun

# ? Feb 14, 2023 10:19

Feldegast42: Oct 29, 2011; COMMENCE THE RITE OF SHITPOSTING

Verb.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 14:58

Failed Imagineer: Sep 22, 2018

The Giuliani Trilogy: Noun, Verb, and 9/11

# ? Feb 14, 2023 15:05

Cooked Auto: Aug 4, 2007; If you will not serve in combat, you will serve on the firing line!

AceOfFlames posted:

Looking forward to Train, Car and Bike.

Pretty sure it should be Train, Bus, Car, Moped, Bike and finally Foot.

# ? Feb 14, 2023 15:39

Zero_Grade: Mar 18, 2004; Darktider 🖤🌊

~Neck Angels~

A trailer for The Flash aired during the Super Bowl, with a longer one available online. Due to the, uh, creative editing decisions, half the people I was with thought it was a trailer for a new Batman movie until the end though!