READ OP! War in Ukraine: a distressed blender making too many margaritas at once

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > READ OP! War in Ukraine: a distressed blender making too many margaritas at once

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Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Hardware made by the lowest bidder :shrug:

# ¿ Feb 28, 2022 05:42

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# ¿ May 10, 2024 02:20

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Because of the war or because nobody in Russia can afford their stuff any more?

The ruble has collapsed so much it literally costs too much just to do business in Russia

All these businesses and companies pulling out, it's not because of their hearts or stance on the war it's because of viability and feasibility - capitalism does not give a poo poo about what is right and what is wrong. At the end of the day it's all about cold hard money and there's none to be had in Russia

# ¿ Mar 4, 2022 22:13

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

A devastating nuclear apocalypse is just the antidote this world needs

Take us back to the stone age and start over again, this time with way less plastic.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ¿ Mar 5, 2022 01:20

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Herstory Begins Now posted:

Interestingly, Ukraine was already awash in antitank launchers, the javelins just were specifically needed because nothing else that they had was working especially well well against T90s.

Anyways this gets to another interesting point: even if the US wasn't backing or supplying weapons or intel to Ukraine 100% someone else would be. The number of countries interested in Ukraine being able to resist the Russian invasion goes far, far beyond the US and many of them are likely a lot more directly motivated and invested than the US even is.

Basically the entirety of Eastern Europe who all had a horribly lovely experience being part of the USSR and got out as soon as they could. If you could throw eggs at your abusive ex, you would. Especially when said ex has made threats to break into your house before.

# ¿ Mar 9, 2022 11:18

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Dick Ripple posted:

Anyone know the current situation in and around Kyiv? Last I heard the Russians were ready to assault it, but they just seem to still be hanging out in that convoy. Is Kyiv surrounded? Or are weapons and supplies still being delivered? Also, what are the odds Zelensky films himself in urban combat?

No matter how much you wish upon a wishing star, and how much western media you read, it's gonna happen. Kyiv is going to be a horrible bloodbath. For the most likely/similar outcome, look up what the Russians did to Grozny in 2000.

The discussion really should be on what the West can do or what their response will be when images of the devastated capital and tens of thousands of innocents slaughtered wholesale are made public.

# ¿ Mar 9, 2022 13:34

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

It is funny to see Eastern media and commentators think language trumps values. I have no doubt as soon as they saw the west rally together the way they did, they all poo poo their pants. Taiwan certainly can sleep a little easier.

# ¿ Mar 10, 2022 14:03

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Moon Slayer posted:

Okay now Poland is starting to worry me a little.

They are receiving hundreds of thousands of refugees, and seeing missile strikes mere miles from their border, I am not surprised the Polish are getting a little skittish.

# ¿ Mar 13, 2022 14:40

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Shes Not Impressed posted:

"I'm not touching you!" Isn't a genuine security policy and we shouldn't tolerate it. I understand going further is Clancychat but at some point the bully must be dealt with.

I agree but there's no easy answer to this. How do we get rid of the bully without igniting WW3? The way western nations are holding back isn't hesitation, it's a genuine attempt to avoid igniting a spark that could have horrific consequences for the world

# ¿ Mar 13, 2022 18:03

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Chello De Don posted:

I've seen mentioned the argument that NATO is actually responsible for the current war, and that Russia is (almost) blameless. I have no clue how one comes to this conclusion; I was accused of only listening to "pro-west" sources on the matter when I got into an argument with a friend over this stuff. Can someone give me a link or a short rundown on the position of the argument?

No. Go sea-lion somewhere else.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ¿ Mar 17, 2022 22:14

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Alchenar posted:

I think vDL was well respected (I mean obviously she was a rising star) but it's a big ship to try and turn around.

Woefully undermined German security to the point where its soldiers trained with wooden guns, and woefully undermined Europe's vaccination campaigns in their early stages. AstraZeneca had a legitimately effective vaccine whose credibility was needlessly undermined by vDL's antics, and potentially cost thousands of lives. I don't know where you got this 'well respected' thing from. As far as I'm concerned she's a loving clown.

# ¿ Mar 19, 2022 15:01

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Russia has zero t-14 armata tanks in Ukraine, a tank that was supposed to be ready in 2015. It was supposed to be their latest and greatest workhorse. That they can't even muster up a single one seven years later tells you all you need to know

# ¿ Mar 19, 2022 16:01

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

KitConstantine posted:

The author's bio:
Creator/Editor-In-Chief of The War Zone @ The Drive. Gizmodo Media Group and Time Inc. alum.

The War Zone is all coverage of combat and military stuff.

If you read the article or my post

Or are you claiming they're lying about the footage? At some point there's a line between 'being suspicious of a source' and 'automatically assuming things are fake for no reason'. Lack of a blue checkmark doesn't mean someone is 'a twitter rando'

The US has said they confirmed it was a hypersonic missile and that they tracked it

I will believe them over a twitter rando

# ¿ Mar 19, 2022 23:13

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

The whole ukraine being taken over by nazis is such a bare-faced and ridiculous lie, surely the russian people know it's nonsense? Everytime Putin or one of Russia's diplomatic twitter spouts off about liberating ukraine from nazis like it's a ww2 cosplay it makes me so angry.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2022 21:14

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Jeza posted:

One of the most surprising things about this whole war for me was how at the start, lots of people could not shut up about how advanced and intimidating the Russian military was, and how shocked they were to find out that it was not the case.

I admit that I don't actively consume any content that muses on the general status of national militaries in peacetime, but every incidental piece of info I've ever seen that pertains to the modern Russian military over the last decade has made it look like a threadbare clown fiesta.

Is this just a case of people slurping up years of thinkpieces from military strategy thinktanks or whatever that end up scaremongering about how incredibly dangerous every opposing geopolitical entity is or what? It feels like Cold War 2.0 where American intelligence consistently overestimated Soviet military capabilities to a farcical extent. What led so many people to have this consensus on Russian military power?

I feel like all these thinktanks and scaremongers only exaggerated Russian military prowess so to justify their own increased spending. It worked before. The MiG-25 scared the entire west into spending billions more, when they finally got one from a defector they found it was dogshit.

# ¿ Mar 21, 2022 12:17

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

KYOON GRIFFEY JR posted:

Combat is somewhat more strenuous than posting on the internet.

8000 calories is beyond excessive, that is obesity-tier territory. In my gym freak days I was doing maybe 3500-4000 at most.

iirc Hafthor Bjornsson is like 7k calories a day

# ¿ Mar 22, 2022 12:46

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

With all due respect I don't think you guys understand just how much 8000 calories per day is, even for heavily armed soldiers.

I mean, I did a quick fact check search and all the links are variously saying 4000 calories or so for American soldiers.

Zedsdeadbaby fucked around with this message at 12:55 on Mar 22, 2022

# ¿ Mar 22, 2022 12:52

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Not to mention the obscene flatulence

# ¿ Mar 22, 2022 13:10

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Alchenar posted:

Yeah what we are seeing is increasingly desperate scrambling to do anything other than deliberately send conscripts into the fight, partly because they would be no good, partly because mass mobilisation would break the 'things are going fine' line, and probably partly because they will be well aware that 'mass mutinies in the army' is one of the scenarios that can be suddenly catastrophic for regime stability if they get just a little bit of momentum.

Putin wouldn't be able to explain that it's only merely a 'special military exercise' either. If Russian society is told of mass mobilization akin to a major conflict, they're gonna be asking questions the Kremlin don't want asking.

# ¿ Mar 25, 2022 13:12

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

I was gonna say that this Dugin fellow sounds just like the guy that wrote 'Foundations of Geopolitics' which is universally considered to be an instruction manual of sorts for the Kremlin. Turns out it's actually Dugin

Whatever his perceived influence is, he comes across as incredibly dangerous and unhinged

# ¿ Mar 26, 2022 13:10

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Crow Buddy posted:

From a few pages back. Are these Ukrainian TDF (aux I hope) geezers or Russian geezers being sent to the front? I am guessing the latter but come on�

I think they're Tuvan, same ethnicity as Sergei Shoigu, it's a rather impoverished area

# ¿ Apr 9, 2022 17:23

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

I really don't think chomsky deserves the amount of discussion he's been generating in this thread.
He's shown up on the last twelve pages or so now. The man has not been relevant in years yet he's winding you all up

# ¿ Apr 17, 2022 21:37

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

A stalemate that lasts until the sanctions completely collapse the Russian economy is probably all Ukraine needs and is well within their ability

# ¿ Apr 18, 2022 13:08

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Congratulations to Russia on securing a pile of rubble alongside the enmity of all the Russian speakers there. Hope the land corridor was worth it.

# ¿ Apr 18, 2022 13:15

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

The poop that literally quoted a twitter post with 'russian affiliated media' on it. Not a very bright poop

# ¿ Apr 18, 2022 19:27

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Mr Luxury Yacht posted:

Hell compare what Finland has with like, less than half of the military budget Canada has.

To be fair, Canada lives next to the USA and Finland lives next to Russia. It's no surprise that one country has much less focus on procurement details for their military than the other.

# ¿ Apr 22, 2022 22:58

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

nvm

Zedsdeadbaby fucked around with this message at 12:37 on Apr 23, 2022

# ¿ Apr 23, 2022 12:33

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

They are next to each other and subsequently have a lot of mutual agreements especially concerning defense

They are both separately worried about Russia of their own accord and going together just seems the natural thing to do

# ¿ May 14, 2022 09:23

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

So did they reverse like that to ensure the Ukrainians can't capture the tanks or are the Russians genuinely loving dumb as rocks

# ¿ May 14, 2022 12:18

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

DandyLion posted:

Yeah this all seems like the obvious next step for putin/russia to begin pushing real hard on the US Conservative apparatus (namely those indebted to putin) with the intent of getting the US to pull out of Ukrainian support/NATO with a hopeful republican victory in 2024. What we're seeing is the beginnings of that mobilization.

This is going to be a real test of European power, it's more and more obvious by the day that the USA is compromised and cannot fulfil its traditional role anymore. The GOP has gone insane.

# ¿ May 19, 2022 12:12

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

They can get hosed. That's a terrible 'plan' to the extent that it makes me wonder if the Kremlin has some assets in Italy that they're leaning on

# ¿ May 23, 2022 04:28

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

They lost their actual good army in 1991

# ¿ May 30, 2022 11:29

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

A lot of the industrial complex manufacturing is in red states and job security in every single one of them is a huge vote winner

It is how the F-35 came to be, despite being the single most expensive project in human history

It is almost certain that politicians will be lobbied very very hard to keep the gravy train going, arming a European state that is in a hot war is like a wet dream times a thousand to them

# ¿ Jun 3, 2022 19:38

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Kchama posted:

So the thing is, money is not able to solve all problems. My reply was in response to "Oh they'll just use their money to build all the stuff they import now." That is not a matter of having money. That is the matter of having expertise and equipment, which also require their own expertise and equipment. And Russia doesn't have either sets of expertise or equipment. This will impact everything, especially their warfighting ability. I believe their industry right now can only service 50% of their society's needs, and they imported the rest. Which is fine, until you piss off the rest of the world to the point that they refuse to sell you what you need. They likely can eventually service the other 50%, but that's going to take a lot of time to do and the quality of that isn't likely going to be nearly as good as Russia is use to for a long time.

EDIT: Like, here's a way to think of it. Say you want to build a house. Yours burned down in a fire. You don't know how to build a house yourself, nor do you have any tools. You probably have the raw materials, at least. You have a friend who graciously gives you a lot of money for the rocks you give him. But all the stores refuse to sell to you for whatever reason. You also aren't allowed into the library. As a result, that money isn't doing you a lot of good when it comes to building the house. You could probably build a house, but it would likely be an extremely low-quality one that is nothing like the nice one you use to have. It would also take a much longer time to build than that nice one you had earlier, if you had the tools and knowledge. Plus, in the meantime, you have no where to live.

That's the situation Russia finds itself in.

Even their 'import substitution' scheme is a total joke, they claim to make their own tractors, except they're all parts kits from another country

# ¿ Jun 8, 2022 15:25

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

d64 posted:

Imo it's in bad taste and off the mark to compare Putin to Hitler. If the Polish govt believes they are the same, why are they standing by then? Why are they not fighting along with Ukraine in that case, instead of taking aim at Germany? It's just cheap rhetoric.

Hitler didn't have nukes. The Allies were loving terrified that he was close to one. The axis had advanced heavy water manufacturing plus working V-2 rockets, it was only a matter of time

# ¿ Jun 9, 2022 12:18

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Russia has openly started sending grain it stole from Ukraine to 'friendly countries'. Thieving loving bastards.

# ¿ Jul 1, 2022 10:33

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Ah yes, Zhakarova, the same person who claimed that the war started because Ukraine wouldn't share their recipe for Borscht.

# ¿ Jul 2, 2022 15:59

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Realistically speaking they will probably go for the rest of Donetsk and call it a day. They know they can't really go much further than what they've got, which is already a sizeable chunk of Ukraine including a land corridor to Crimea and the sea of Azov, along with the industrial areas and huge number of fossil fuel reserves.

# ¿ Jul 5, 2022 04:47

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Staluigi posted:

Hearing today that russia is taking a "pause" to relieve their overworked troops and for the first time since this whole affair began, 133 or so days in, no russian advances were recorded

The Russians tend to make up excuses for this sort of thing, bit like how being forced off Snake Island was an apparent gesture of goodwill. I would not be surprised if the recent HIMARS artillery strikes on logistics and critical supply points have had a profound effect on them despite their relatively low number

# ¿ Jul 8, 2022 04:44

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

FishBulbia posted:

https://twitter.com/ArbiterOfTweets/status/1545651614253555712

https://twitter.com/ArbiterOfTweets/status/1545674709861371904

British tabloids are loving trash and it's basically the default assumption here that they falsify _everything_

The other papers never should have ran with it, especially since it was the Daily Star which is so loving bottom tier you can't even wipe your butt with it, lest the ink stains you.

# ¿ Jul 9, 2022 15:03

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# ¿ May 10, 2024 02:20

Zedsdeadbaby: Jun 14, 2008; You have been called out, in the ways of old.

Nenonen posted:

Sanctions are working

I'd say that's just more the absence of HAVI logistics than anything else. McDonalds is all about logistics with food a distant second.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2022 17:30

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > READ OP! War in Ukraine: a distressed blender making too many margaritas at once

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