Let's post sentences no one has ever said with a smile on their face

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Let's post sentences no one has ever said with a smile on their face

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flyingporcupine: Feb 21, 2010; by Pragmatica

precision posted:

deffo doing your part there chief haha

# ? Mar 19, 2022 20:30

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 28, 2024 18:51

FoolyCharged: Oct 11, 2012; Cheating at a raffle? I sentence you to 1 year in jail! No! Two years! Three! Four! Five years! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Somebody call for an ant?

What a lame ban me.

# ? Mar 20, 2022 23:22

Mozi: Apr 4, 2004; Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die; Nap Ghost

yeah i'm pretty sure that word has been often said with a very disgusting smile

# ? Mar 20, 2022 23:24

syntaxfunction: Oct 27, 2010

There Bias Two posted:

Are...are you Nat?

Yeah, I'm Nat.

(Another sentence never said smiling)

# ? Mar 20, 2022 23:24

Mozi: Apr 4, 2004; Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die; Nap Ghost

hey, it's sleeting!

# ? Mar 20, 2022 23:26

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

This graupel feels great!

# ? Mar 20, 2022 23:26

Bad Purchase: Jun 17, 2019

look at this pigs tiny balls

# ? Mar 20, 2022 23:33

Edgar Allen Ho: Apr 3, 2017; by sebmojo

I live in Iowa

# ? Mar 21, 2022 01:20

precision: May 7, 2006; by VideoGames

"One for Schindler's List."

# ? Mar 21, 2022 02:09

Nice Guy Patron: Jun 29, 2015

We need to talk.

# ? Mar 21, 2022 02:14

Mozi: Apr 4, 2004; Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die; Nap Ghost

are you the father of the deceased?

# ? Mar 21, 2022 02:15

FoolyCharged: Oct 11, 2012; Cheating at a raffle? I sentence you to 1 year in jail! No! Two years! Three! Four! Five years! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Somebody call for an ant?

I've got roaches in my house

# ? Mar 21, 2022 02:32

Bula Vinaka: Oct 21, 2020; beach side

the condom broke

# ? Mar 21, 2022 03:23

syntaxfunction: Oct 27, 2010

Bula Vinaka posted:

the condom broke

If you have a breeding kink this is fine actually.

# ? Mar 21, 2022 03:24

blight rhino: Feb 11, 2014; EXQUISITE ~~LURKER~~ RHINO; Nap Ghost

blight rhino posted:

i came home from the airport late Saturday night. There were a group of guys outside my neighbors looking around and just looking weird. I asked what's up.
Apparently while neighbors were hosting a group, someone came up in their front yard and ripped down a gay pride flag.

i'm straight. i don't know my neighbors. but i liked looking at it in the mornings and being like "right on."

i've already ordered a replacement flag, and have plans to go introduce myself and offer the replacement, with the caveat that they don't need to hang it back up, since it might get got, again.

I have friends and a family member in the community, and I'm all about rights, and flying that flag.
I want to tell them I want to bust the head of the person that did that.

it's not a super great neighborhood, but that poo poo is kind of past the line. I didn't do anything when I saw Trump signs, and recently Youngkin (Virginia). Kind of makes me regret that I didn't do anything, but that'd be stooping to the level.

bottom line, am i going to come off as really weird and awkward? (i mean besides my innate weirdness and awkwardness)

would this be a stupid gesture? i don't want to put pressure on anyone. and like i said, i'd be happy if they took it and just chucked it in their closet or something. i'd just like them to know that at least someone in the neighborhood recognizes what happened, and think it's lovely.

you did say sentences

# ? Mar 21, 2022 04:30

blight rhino: Feb 11, 2014; EXQUISITE ~~LURKER~~ RHINO; Nap Ghost

"No, no! It's fine! You're fine! Just don't look"

# ? Mar 21, 2022 04:31

Nice Guy Patron: Jun 29, 2015

Is it a lot of blood?

# ? Mar 21, 2022 15:28

precision: May 7, 2006; by VideoGames

Guess I'll re-register

# ? Mar 21, 2022 16:22

Bula Vinaka: Oct 21, 2020; beach side

He's a liberal

# ? Mar 22, 2022 02:11

precision: May 7, 2006; by VideoGames

Yes, I'd like to speak at the Intellectual Dark Web Conference.

# ? Mar 22, 2022 02:12

Pastel Candy Snake: Sep 6, 2018; by Hand Knit

One TimBit, please.

# ? Mar 22, 2022 03:18

GoonGPT: May 26, 2006; Posting for a better future, today!

Cspam is leaking.

# ? Mar 22, 2022 03:38

Earwicker: Jan 6, 2003

i think... *urp* i think there was something wrong with that fish we had for lunch

# ? Mar 22, 2022 03:44

Mozi: Apr 4, 2004; Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die; Nap Ghost

call me ishmael

# ? Mar 22, 2022 03:47

Darth Brooks: Jan 15, 2005; I do not wear this mask to protect me. I wear it to protect you from me.

Shakes head, "You brought two too many."

# ? Mar 22, 2022 03:57

Bula Vinaka: Oct 21, 2020; beach side

the toilet overflowed

# ? Mar 22, 2022 06:05

kntfkr: Feb 11, 2019; GOOSE FUCKER

"We're missing one dowel."

# ? Mar 22, 2022 06:07

I.C.: Jun 10, 2008

I�m not pregnant, I�m just fat.

# ? Mar 22, 2022 06:15

Funky See Funky Do: Aug 20, 2013; STILL TRYING HARD

Nah mate it's not haemorrhoids, it's a barnacle.

# ? Mar 22, 2022 06:17

Icochet: Mar 18, 2008; I have a very small TV. Don't make fun of it! Please don't shame it like that~; Grimey Drawer

I am out of mana

# ? Mar 22, 2022 07:49

HORSE-SLAUGHTERER: Nov 11, 2020; H O R S E - S L A U G H T E R E R

my bowel health is garbage. i constantly poo poo out deep black bloody crap

# ? Mar 22, 2022 08:39

OMFG FURRY: Jul 10, 2006; [snarky comment]

time to post in cspam

# ? Mar 22, 2022 08:45

Baxter: Sep 13, 2000

Is that Andy Dick?

# ? Mar 22, 2022 08:49

Edward Mass: Sep 14, 2011; 𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen𝅘𝅥𝅮