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Simple. The cavemen tore the stalagmites out of the ground so they didn't accidentally sit on them. Because there's nothing worse than a cold stalagmite up the rear end. I expect an honorary degree for this finding.
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Apr 23, 2022 21:53
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quote:Though the researchers aren’t sure of the purpose of these ring structures, their analysis showed they were made from similarly sized pieces of stalagmites, suggesting the construction was carefully planned, they said. That discovery, along with traces of fire activity, suggest the builders (likely Neanderthals) had complex social behaviors. In addition the structures may have been used to enclose fires. quote:The round structures were discovered in Bruniquel Cave in South-West France. The stalagmites had been chopped to similar lengths and laid out in two oval patterns up to 40cm (16in) high. interesting post op, not finding much about it since 2016.
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Apr 23, 2022 22:04
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imagine being too fuckin dumb to build a house so you have to live in a cave lmao
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Apr 23, 2022 23:29
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GolfHole posted:imagine being too fuckin dumb to build a house so you have to live in a cave lmao I'm astonished at this doctrine.
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Apr 23, 2022 23:38
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Tree Bucket posted:I'm astonished at this doctrine. truckin and fuckin is in my cave
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Apr 24, 2022 00:09
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It looks like a pub if I've ever seen one.
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Apr 24, 2022 00:15
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BigBadSteve posted:Simple. The cavemen tore the stalagmites out of the ground so they didn't accidentally sit on them. Because there's nothing worse than a cold stalagmite up the rear end. Emptyquote
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Apr 24, 2022 00:15
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I am an expert in Neanderthal religion. The stalagmites represent penises. This really shouldn't come as a surprise. A modern human is always quick to notice when something created by random and natural processes resembles a face, a boob, or a cock. Neanderthals were no different. With that in mind, it is pretty easy to divine the purpose of this structure: the symbolic penises are stacked in a circle around the sacred flame as an offering to their ever cock-hungry divinity, also known as OP's mom.
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Apr 24, 2022 00:34
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Sorry it was actually me who built this.
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Apr 24, 2022 01:26
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Couldn't it just have been some bored kids in the middle ages?
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Apr 24, 2022 01:27
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thats where neanderthals went to do their grossest smelliest farts op
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Apr 24, 2022 01:44
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https://youtube.com/shorts/PE0vmzJq_Cs?feature=share
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Apr 24, 2022 01:47
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What do you wanna bet one of those researchers tried putting one of them up their rear end?
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Apr 24, 2022 02:03
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the real fascinating thing to me is why people with degrees insist on assigning cultural significance to everything ancient people did when clearly modern ones just to random poo poo for no reason 95% of the time
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Apr 24, 2022 13:27
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they found the cave where a somethingawful posters ancestor autistically lined up rocks and assume religion must be the reason
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Apr 24, 2022 13:29
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yeah gosh i can't imagine why they would want to go in the magical cave of buttplugs and dildos
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Apr 24, 2022 13:37
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Big Beef City posted:Probably one of them whale milking pens I've been hearing about Neanderthal star citizen
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Apr 24, 2022 13:45
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I have this dream where I'm in a very narrow tunnel that I have to crawl on all fours to move down. It seems to go on forever. Down and down and down it goes until I reach the end where there is a small chamber full of bones and at the centre of it is a perfectly spherical smooth black rock about as wide and as high as my arms outstretched - way too big to fit through the tunnel I came in from. I hope someone finds something like that one day. That would be interesting.
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Apr 24, 2022 13:46
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That's where they teleported the gently caress outta here, OP
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Apr 24, 2022 13:51
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More like neanderth-some dumb mother fuckers
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Apr 24, 2022 14:04
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Noblesse Obliged posted:the real fascinating thing to me is why people with degrees insist on assigning cultural significance to everything ancient people did when clearly modern ones just to random poo poo for no reason 95% of the time Some people want to believe that ancient humans fit the "Magical Black Person" archetype. It's like the complete opposite of people who think ancient humans were complete dumbfucks who needed aliens to build everything for them.
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Apr 24, 2022 14:04
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What if they quite literally were magical black people though
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Apr 24, 2022 14:08
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I mean that would be pretty cool you go back in time and expect to see Og the museum set piece in his mammoth onesie and instead it's Gal El Sook the eldritch rocking a loving wizard robe and a stalactite staff calling down the thunder
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Apr 24, 2022 14:11
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Big Beef City posted:What if they quite literally were magical black people though Then the Nation of Islam was right all along.
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Apr 24, 2022 14:12
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Imagine being outsmarted by a neanderthal
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Apr 24, 2022 14:53
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Apr 24, 2022 14:58
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People must have been eating poo poo tons of mammoths if they were making their homes out of mammoth bones instead of trees
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Apr 24, 2022 15:31
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Devils Affricate posted:People must have been eating poo poo tons of mammoths if they were making their homes out of mammoth bones instead of trees The real reason there was a human bottleneck 70,000 years ago was due to massive environmental collapse caused by humans killing and eating everything in sight. Humanity would have died out if they hadn't invented farming out of desperation.
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Apr 24, 2022 15:34
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It's a sex cave, op
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Apr 24, 2022 15:42
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Being part neanderthal myself and being fairly familiar with humans, I would lean to: "Lol Ogg, if you hit those rock dongs hard enough with this, they break right off, it's fun as hell, wanna go break some?" over "Ogg, this is a special spiritual place. The rock dongs represent fertility or some poo poo like that."
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Apr 25, 2022 00:44
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Noblesse Obliged posted:the real fascinating thing to me is why people with degrees insist on assigning cultural significance to everything ancient people did when clearly modern ones just to random poo poo for no reason 95% of the time A lot to unpack with this comment. What do you mean by "cultural significance"? Keep in mind the articles edited the original archaeologists quotes to hell and back, so what might seem to be some bold claims might actually be clearer in the published paper that it's total hypothesis or supported by evidence. Also, here's a quote from the article: "Some of the burning must surely be associated with lighting in such a dark location, but only further discoveries from this or other sites will show us how common were such deep cave occupations in the ancient past, and what their purpose might have been." Not exactly a controversial statement. My partner is an archaeologist in a region with much more modern human activity and a clear picture of the historical record, and she certainly doesn't attach what the motivation might be for a site outside of "shelter", "trading route", "hunting ground", "garbage dump", or how things were used without objective evidence. For example, there's a small item they keep finding all over the region they just call a "whatsit", because the cultural knowledge has been lost (well, purposely eradicated by the colonizing government) and they aren't about to just guess and officially declare what they were used for without some clear evidence. stratdax fucked around with this message at 06:33 on Apr 25, 2022 |
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Apr 25, 2022 04:45
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Yaldabaoth posted:Some people want to believe that ancient humans fit the "Magical Black Person" archetype. It's like the complete opposite of people who think ancient humans were complete dumbfucks who needed aliens to build everything for them. Weird posts itt. Are you even talking about this finding specifically anymore or arguing against something you've built up in your head or what.
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Apr 25, 2022 05:40
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looks like where the threw away their old dildos that they shoved up their poopy asses
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Apr 25, 2022 05:57
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i used to be confused at the idea of tiny men bringing down all the huge fauna of the time but after giving it some thought. i can see like an achilles heel angle, like humans can easily pass off to one another the small little poke they have to do to your huge mammal rear end to have you bleed out within a day. the golden corral of the b.c... was wooly mammoth carcass.
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Apr 25, 2022 06:03
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It's so obvious, the big circle was for unga, and the smaller circle was dedicated to bunga.
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Apr 25, 2022 06:38
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This is obviously a model of a cell.
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Apr 25, 2022 07:25
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stratdax posted:A lot to unpack with this comment. What do you mean by "cultural significance"? Keep in mind the articles edited the original archaeologists quotes to hell and back, so what might seem to be some bold claims might actually be clearer in the published paper that it's total hypothesis or supported by evidence. Also, here's a quote from the article: "Some of the burning must surely be associated with lighting in such a dark location, but only further discoveries from this or other sites will show us how common were such deep cave occupations in the ancient past, and what their purpose might have been." Whatever it was, it goes in the butt.
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Apr 25, 2022 08:18
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they're all fossilized neanderthal turds
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Apr 25, 2022 08:41
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ngl part of me thinks it looks like they just fell off the ceiling on their own at some point
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Apr 25, 2022 08:46
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Knormal posted:This is obviously a model of a cell. The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell
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Apr 25, 2022 09:00
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