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Your team is eliminated and everything sucks! Now what? Do you have some entertaining kids to start building a team around? Are you just going to keep tanking but instead start doing so in front of 1/4 of the empty seats you used to play in front of? Perhaps you're going to "aggressively retool" by extending an enormous defenseman with all the power AND all the maneuverability of a standard US WWII battleship! [tuba noises] Maybe you can kill some more beloved alumni! Are you going to find some other drains to piss into? Maybe your team is now in bizarre ownership limbo after the death of your owner! Perhaps you can keep telling everyone how this coming year you're totally back and the kids are going to be great and please ignore the goaltending and hey stop laughing at our jerseys that literally say jersey on them that's quite rude! Maybe you're thinking about continuing doing uh... [rubs back of head awkwardly] [shuffles papers] whatever the gently caress Detroit is doing! Hey! You could keep running goalies out of town! That'll definitely fix it! It's time to complain about it here! Hockey is terrible!
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 14:29 |
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# ? May 2, 2024 06:51 |
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I don't see anything in your post to complain about op, all of it is awesome
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 14:44 |
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From the last thread...ThinkTank posted:I hated [the Knights] before it was cool. I was quite whiny about it. I hope they miss the playoffs by a point. Mr. Kite fucked around with this message at 14:48 on Apr 27, 2022 |
# ? Apr 27, 2022 14:45 |
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The Philadelphia Flyers are dogshit garbage.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 14:46 |
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I suspect I'll be posting a lot here soon with how dogshit the Penguins look. Keep my seat warm fellas.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 14:56 |
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Mr. Kite posted:From the last thread... They're a great success story for the league and it's nice seeing an American city genuinely embrace hockey like that, especially one outside the North East. It depends on how the next few years go, but Vegas is almost certainly the only American city where hockey is the most popular sport in town. With that said, them becoming a big market, immediately having a ton of success (especially against my team) and becoming a kinda dirty team powered by cap shenanigans and a heartless management made them very hateable. I will savour their elimination like a fine chardonnay on a pleasant summer afternoon.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 15:06 |
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It's going to rule when the Knights are eliminated by Dallas losing to Arizona in a shootout.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 15:07 |
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Do you have some entertaining kids to start building a team around? Yes! Are you just going to keep tanking but instead start doing so in front of 1/4 of the empty seats you used to play in front of? Lol, my team has never figured out how to tank. Perhaps you're going to "aggressively retool" by extending an enormous defenseman with all the power AND all the maneuverability of a standard US WWII battleship! [tuba noises] God, I hope not! Maybe you can kill some more beloved alumni! We already did that last summer. Are you going to find some other drains to piss into? Uhh...sure? Maybe your team is now in bizarre ownership limbo after the death of your owner! Thank gently caress no Perhaps you can keep telling everyone how this coming year you're totally back and the kids are going to be great and please ignore the goaltending and hey stop laughing at our jerseys that literally say jersey on them that's quite rude! Those Jersey jerseys are Bad Jerseys Maybe you're thinking about continuing doing uh... [rubs back of head awkwardly] [shuffles papers] whatever the gently caress Detroit is doing! I've picked up what DJExile is doing here and am now trying to figure out which is Columbus Hey! You could keep running goalies out of town! That'll definitely fix it! He wanted $10M in spite of being fairly consistently Not Worth $10M after Game 82 except that one time. Oh, wait, this isn't the CBJ one, either? It's time to complain about it here! Hockey is terrible! Good take, op. ThinkTank posted:They're a great success story for the league and it's nice seeing an American city genuinely embrace hockey like that, especially one outside the North East. It depends on how the next few years go, but Vegas is almost certainly the only American city where hockey is the most popular sport in town. I probably would've hated them and their success had I not been in town and decided to go to their first-ever home game (preseason vs. the Kings) and fell in love, but lessail. Speaking of: quote:I suspect I'll be posting a lot here soon with how dogshit the Penguins look. Keep my seat warm fellas. Is this surely the year the Chicken Little prophecies about your team come true even though they're sitting on 101 points and going into the playoffs with four (4!) skaters at a PPG pace or better, have a third-line center with 45 points, and the Rags are a slumping or injured Igor Shesterkin from being very beatable? e- How in the hell did an '=' show up before the word "about"? CBJSprague24 fucked around with this message at 15:22 on Apr 27, 2022 |
# ? Apr 27, 2022 15:10 |
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CBJSprague24 posted:Maybe you can kill some more beloved alumni! We already did that last summer.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 15:14 |
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The Penguins are surely the greatest 7 seed of all time
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 15:15 |
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CBJSprague24 posted:Is this surely the year the Chicken Little prophecies comes true about your team come true even though they're sitting on 101 points and going into the playoffs with four (4!) skaters at a PPG pace or better, have a third-line center with 45 points, and the Rags are a slumping or injured Igor Shesterkin from being very beatable? You do realize they've lost in the first round the past three years right, including one to Montreal of all teams? They've also been complete and utter poo poo for the entirety of March. They've also been dominated by the team they're about to face in the first round. Don't get me wrong though I expect no pity and deserve none. And I am more optimistic about their chances than most here. Anything can happen in the playoffs and dumb teams go on runs all the time like Montreal last year. But this team looks about as dead walking as a team can going into the playoffs.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 15:15 |
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Ginette Reno posted:You do realize they've lost in the first round the past three years right, including one to Montreal of all teams? Yes. quote:Anything can happen in the playoffs and dumb teams go on runs all the time like Montreal last year. Also Yes.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 15:17 |
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ThinkTank posted:They're a great success story for the league and it's nice seeing an American city genuinely embrace hockey like that, especially one outside the North East. It depends on how the next few years go, but Vegas is almost certainly the only American city where hockey is the most popular sport in town. I appreciate the level of shithead team that they are. I won't root for them but I like that they exist. The league needs its villains CBJSprague24 posted:Yes. Good, glad that's settled. Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to get my notepad of line combinations ready for round 1
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 15:22 |
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ThinkTank posted:They're a great success story for the league and it's nice seeing an American city genuinely embrace hockey like that, especially one outside the North East. It depends on how the next few years go, but Vegas is almost certainly the only American city where hockey is the most popular sport in town. Ginette Reno posted:I appreciate the level of shithead team that they are. I won't root for them but I like that they exist. The league needs its villains They definitely did find a way to very quickly pull a heel turn. A couple of their botched moves have been schadenfreude city for sure. I'm hoping them missing the playoffs maybe deters teams from attempting the Tampa/Vegas/Chicago-style levels of cap fuckerahhh who am I kidding? e- https://twitter.com/jeremiahgraves/status/1519017494257696768 If we didn't have the Guy Lafleur thread title already, I'd be all over "NHL Offseason N/V: Squish Fan Squashes The Garbage With Their Squasher-Downer". CBJSprague24 fucked around with this message at 15:28 on Apr 27, 2022 |
# ? Apr 27, 2022 15:24 |
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Please keep all playoff discussion in the (yet to be created) playoff thread. Us loser franchise fans don't need to be reminded of how much better it could be.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 15:32 |
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You coulda waited for a playoff thread to exist before you closed the Great February N/V thread, just sayin'
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 15:44 |
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for once, thankfully, i am not here. YET. YET.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 16:00 |
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The Philadelphia Flyers are dogshit garbage
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 16:03 |
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Remaining playoff scenarios: Dallas/Vegas are the only remaining in or out scenario and only barely. Only Oilers with home ice against Kings is fully decided. St.Louis/Minny is also set, but home ice is TBD. None of the East is set. The teams are in and the 4 higher seeds are set, but 3rd/Wildcard order in each division is in play. East Florida and Leaf’s are set 1-2 Tampa has a magic number of 2 on the Bruins for 3rd. Winner gets Toronto Bruins/Tampa loser will finish ahead of Washington/Pittsburgh loser and be WC1 and get the Canes. Carolina is set and will face Boston/Tampa Rangers set at 2. Washington/Pittsburgh can’t be decided until game 82. Winner gets NYR, loser gets Florida. West Colorado is set, just waiting for opponent. Could face any of Nashville, Dallas or Vegas. St. Louis will play Minny, just a matter of who’s at home to be decided. Minny has a game in hand, but Blues have the tiebreaker. Won’t be decided until game 82. Nashville has clinched, needs to play even with Dallas to be WC1 and play Calgary, else Avs. Dallas has at least clinched going to tiebreakers against Vegas. Anything other than 2 regulation losses by Dallas and 2 Regulation wins clinches for Dallas. Could finish WC1, 2 or miss out completely. Flames are set and will face either Nashville or Dallas Oilers/kings is the only 100% locked in series Vegas are theoretically alive but everything has to go perfect. If they make it, they can only finish WC2 and get the Avs. Non-Playoff teams with a chance at a non-lottery assisted top 10 pick. Only 2 lottery slots this year, so the worst a team can do is position+2: Habs and Coyotes will be 1-2 Seattle, Philly, Jersey will be 3-6 Chicago is 4-6 Sens and Wings will be 7-9 Sabres could go anywhere from 7-11 Ducks and Sharks are 9-11
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 16:06 |
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Added a playoff N/V so we can poo poo up the proper threads: https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=4000585.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 16:07 |
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Eric the Mauve posted:You coulda waited for a playoff thread to exist before you closed the Great February N/V thread, just sayin' You'd think, but some teams have been ready for golfing for a month already. I mean, we kept the regular season thread open for the Vancouver v Calgary regular season series last summer.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 16:07 |
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pseudodragon posted:Non-Playoff teams with a chance at a non-lottery assisted top 10 pick. Only 2 lottery slots this year, so the worst a team can do is position+2: Going off of capfriendly, the 1st round picks that have been traded are: the WORSE of Carolina or Montreal's 1st rounder goes to Coyotes (it was going to be the best, but MTL top 10 protected themselves), so Arizona gets the Carolina pick at about 30 Chicago's pick goes to CBJ the Sabres get Vegas' pick, unless it is top 10 (very unlikely, in which case it transfers to next year) Anaheim has Boston's pick Winnipeg gets NYR's pick if Copp plays 50% of games in 2 rounds of the playoffs Chicago gets Minnesota's pick if Minnesota reaches the WCF and Fleury gets at least four wins Montreal has Calgary's pick Arizona has Colorado's pick too, so they pick for themselves, then CAR, then COL Buffalo has Florida's pick
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 16:16 |
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the Winnipeg Jets are run by imbeciles and I want their imbecilic heads to roll
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 16:22 |
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offseason n/v: Mark Kastelic lmao https://twitter.com/IneffectiveMath/status/1519332718592634882
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 16:26 |
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DJExile posted:Perhaps you're going to "aggressively retool" by extending an enormous defenseman with all the power AND all the maneuverability of a standard US WWII battleship! [tuba noises] Actually I'll have you know that the Iowa class battleships were both excellent in their speed, longevity, and maneuverability before we discuss their firepower and protection. Of course the Edit: ohhhhh foiled you put 'standard' there.....yeah. That's a good one. Risto is a real uhhhhh USS Arizona. rex rabidorum vires fucked around with this message at 16:33 on Apr 27, 2022 |
# ? Apr 27, 2022 16:31 |
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I appreciate the DJExile style of OP and the fact that it's consistent between NHL and NCAA threads.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 16:33 |
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Love the thread title.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 16:40 |
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The assassination of Guy LeFleur by the coward Marc Bergevin
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 17:00 |
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Arivia posted:Going off of capfriendly, the 1st round picks that have been traded are: Chicago's 1st is lottery-protected and they keep it if it's #1 or 2, at which point Columbus gets it in 2023 regardless of lottery.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 19:20 |
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CBJSprague24 posted:Chicago's 1st is lottery-protected and they keep it if it's #1 or 2, at which point Columbus gets it in 2023 regardless of lottery. Chicago can't go higher than 4th this year, so that won't apply.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 19:24 |
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Arivia posted:Chicago can't go higher than 4th this year, so that won't apply. Gotcha, I misunderstood the list and thought it was just a general list of each traded pick and conditions.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 19:28 |
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Too bad, it would have been spectacular to see Columbus land Bedard with Chicago's pick. You guys all know the Old Boys Network is going to make it up to Chicago for all this... unpleasantness by rigging the Bedard lottery for them, right?
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 19:32 |
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CBJSprague24 posted:Gotcha, I misunderstood the list and thought it was just a general list of each traded pick and conditions. Yeah, sorry, I don't do these very often. I just figured it's nice to look at your team's riches when you're busy bemoaning not being in the playoffs. And I mean this generally not to be a jerk to you in particular. Columbus is cool.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 19:36 |
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My only rooting interest now is that Vegas doesn't make it
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 19:53 |
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Arivia posted:Chicago can't go higher than 4th this year, so that won't apply. They could still win one of the top 2 picks in the actual lottery. Hey have somewhere between a 15 and 19% chance depending on where they finish.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 20:02 |
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Kirill Marchenko, after hearing about him for what feels like an eternity, is finally, officially, coming to the NHL. https://twitter.com/markscheig/status/1519290770464858112 quote:Marchenko’s another legitimate potential top-nine NHL forward with a pro frame and more of a knack for scoring than facilitating. He has been a top player and producer in his age group in the KHL for the last three seasons (and should be playing more than he is this year). He’s a strong and sturdy winger who plays the game with skill characteristic of a smaller player, with A-grade hands and touch with the puck which helps him fool goalies and defenders one-on-one or feather a shot into a specific location in the net from a tough angle when there isn’t an opportunity to blow the puck past a goalie (which he can also do). (https://theathletic.com/3096472/2022/02/05/wheelers-2022-nhl-prospect-pool-rankings-no-6-columbus-blue-jackets/) The CBJ are going to be interesting going forward, especially given the glut of forwards which could turn into trade chips. Ignoring any potential deals, early spitballin' for next year could have: Laine-Jenner-Voracek Bjorkstrand-Roslovic-Nyquist Johnson-Sillinger-Chinakhov Texier-Kuraly-Robinson Marchenko/Danforth Werenski-Peeke Gavrikov-Boqvist Bean-Blankenburg Christansen Merzlikins Tarasov Arivia posted:Yeah, sorry, I don't do these very often. I just figured it's nice to look at your team's riches when you're busy bemoaning not being in the playoffs. And I mean this generally not to be a jerk to you in particular. Columbus is cool. Nah, all good.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 20:14 |
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pseudodragon posted:They could still win one of the top 2 picks in the actual lottery. Hey have somewhere between a 15 and 19% chance depending on where they finish. I thought the lottery this year was only to move up two slots, not to go right to 1st or 2nd. If I misinterpreted it, my mistake.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 20:17 |
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https://twitter.com/MDeFranks/status/1519358063530106880 Silly Vegas, you can't do cap shenanigans when a player is IN the lineup.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 20:18 |
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Arivia posted:I thought the lottery this year was only to move up two slots, not to go right to 1st or 2nd. If I misinterpreted it, my mistake. Lottery winners move up 10 spots max. Full odds and rules: https://www.tankathon.com/nhl/pick_odds
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 22:30 |
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# ? May 2, 2024 06:51 |
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pseudodragon posted:Lottery winners move up 10 spots max. Full odds and rules: Hey, at least the Canucks can only drop one spot this year.
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# ? Apr 27, 2022 22:43 |