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i gave up trying to be self reliant and tried four antidepressants and one worked, and that seemed to resolve many issues. the problem is, once i sorted out what i can only assume is a chemical imbalance in my body that was causing my depression, i then had to deal with a separate crisis, a crisis of meaning. the farthest i've gotten is that helping people seems to have some meaning to it if you don't think about it too hard. helping people is never a good deal, it's almost never reciprocated, once i got past this it resolved many more issues. i still struggle to look at the world around me and feel confident. i put on a great facade, but my inner world is much like anyone elses. how do you look at the world and feel good about your place in it? i live in the greatest most prosperous country on earth, and it loving sucks and we're doomed. i guess if you're focusing on trying to help the people around you, you can mostly rely on eachother. that's all there is. good luck op.
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May 13, 2022 02:10
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| # ¿ May 11, 2024 11:38 |
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deep dish peat moss posted:This is surely personal and different for everyone but for me it was detaching myself from the idea that my life needed to "mean something" or that "my place in the world" needed to be anything more than surviving and not being harmful to the life or environment around me. We're all just animals and we don't have some obligation to "achieve" or "be successful" - those are corporate propaganda, rags-to-riches stories are cherrypicked fiction to make the american dream seem achievable when it never has been. The only true "purpose" of life is to consume energy and, when and if advantageous, reproduce. we're talking about there being an objective meaning vs there being a personal spiritual meaning. the only thing that ever brought me a feeling of peace was helping people. of course i could investigate it away, and find that what i did wasn't that helpful, and that the person i was helping didn't deserve help. that's probably the objective truth, but it's not about objective truth, it's about how i feel about it. that's the only thing that matters to me. if i could be one of those very religious people that really believes, i would. i think that helps a person in life. but obviously it's objectively incorrect i mean lol.
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May 13, 2022 03:12
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