Women's EURO England 2022

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Ray Parlour > Women's EURO England 2022

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

It's finally here. Yet another 'it's coming home' cup.

it's not coming home

The groups:

Good teams and how they'll lose:

Netherlands won the previous tournament and have a goalscoring machine in Vivianne Miedema but they lost their coach to England
England have a really good squad with lots of depth but it's England so they'll probably bottle it somewhere
France is really strong but it's also a combination of an ongoing internal conflict and a really unpopular coach who dropped Lyon players just because she felt like it
Sweden won the silver medal at the Olympics last year and are probably the most solid European team out there right now
Spain looked really good until their best player (and the Ballon d'Or 2021 winner) Alexia Putellas tore her ACL a day before the tournament

Also, Portugal is here since Russia got kicked out of the tournament, Austria will probably beat England in the opener, Norway's Ada Hegerberg is back and she won the Champions League this year, lots of fun guaranteed.

Things to read and listen to:
Guardian did a really good guide on all the players

# ¿ Jul 6, 2022 07:56

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# ¿ May 18, 2024 03:48

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

First up:

# ¿ Jul 6, 2022 08:02

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Grimson posted:

https://twitter.com/mia_eriksson/status/1544695612809027584?s=20&t=zhPwPFNAe0bdTwiY5rZtiA

It's rough. Denmark forfeited a game in their WC qualifiers because of a pay dispute and then lost the playoffs.

There are quite a lot non-professional players in this tournament.

# ¿ Jul 6, 2022 17:00

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

https://twitter.com/Lionesses/status/1544737419819470848

England home kit fucken slaps

# ¿ Jul 6, 2022 19:04

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Mead is really good

# ¿ Jul 6, 2022 20:19

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

habeasdorkus posted:

UEFA's sportocrats should be defenestrated. This particular time, it should be for holding a ton of games in 7000 and 12000 seat venues.

Their explanation is that the venues were chosen 5 years ago but that's still bullshit.

# ¿ Jul 7, 2022 12:34

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

This one will end in double digits.

# ¿ Jul 7, 2022 20:13

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Holy lmao & all the lols

e: this was after Germany struck the woodwork twice in a row and then missed an open goal

Denmark are getting overwhelmed though

Terminally Bored fucked around with this message at 20:57 on Jul 8, 2022

# ¿ Jul 8, 2022 20:14

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

https://twitter.com/jezs/status/1545801949064339457

I think I watched a Servette game last season and that Portugese goalie shipped like 5 in one game.

# ¿ Jul 9, 2022 17:38

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Fantastic game. Hope the next one delivers.

# ¿ Jul 9, 2022 18:56

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Even without the injuries, they didn't look like they could handle Sweden. Roord had to play them out of their own corner at times.

# ¿ Jul 9, 2022 20:55

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Clown defending from Italy. Complete shambles.

Doctor Teeth posted:

i still don't understand why france didn't call up amandine henry

Corinne Diacre hates Lyon afaik. She even dropped Renard for a while.

e: still time in the match for France to implode

Terminally Bored fucked around with this message at 20:36 on Jul 10, 2022

# ¿ Jul 10, 2022 20:29

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

The Italian strategy of not bothering the French attack and giving them as much space as possible is paying handsomely.

Doctor Teeth posted:

it'd have to be an all-timer

All of my predictions itt have been complete poo poo and will stay that way.

e: :tviv:

Terminally Bored fucked around with this message at 20:46 on Jul 10, 2022

# ¿ Jul 10, 2022 20:44

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Should've been a red. And holy poo poo does Gama have a bad game today. She's off pace constantly.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2022 21:25

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Terminally Bored posted:

Mead is really good

# ¿ Jul 11, 2022 20:17

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Thorisd�ttir is having a game

Even if that wasn't a pen she is still getting destroyed out there

# ¿ Jul 11, 2022 20:31

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

I think that Bethany Mead is quite talented indeed

# ¿ Jul 11, 2022 20:35

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Kirby with 2 assists in 2 minutes

# ¿ Jul 11, 2022 20:42

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

britishbornandbread posted:

England.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3UEFCHuvLnk

# ¿ Jul 11, 2022 21:00

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

habeasdorkus posted:

The thing is, Norway is more likely than not to move on to the knockouts even with this absolute thrashing.

Austria will beat them.

# ¿ Jul 11, 2022 21:52

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Flow My Tears, The Norwegian Said

# ¿ Jul 12, 2022 08:45

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

This Spanish team is pretty bad

# ¿ Jul 12, 2022 20:37

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

# ¿ Jul 12, 2022 21:56

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Also Miedema has covid so :rip:

Netherlands

# ¿ Jul 12, 2022 21:58

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Well now. Bachmann got angry.

# ¿ Jul 13, 2022 18:15

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Sombrerotron posted:

but also ouch

That's a broken nose.

# ¿ Jul 13, 2022 20:18

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

the sex ghost posted:

Shitaly

# ¿ Jul 14, 2022 17:03

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

# ¿ Jul 14, 2022 20:37

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

So undeserved she missed it twice lmao

# ¿ Jul 14, 2022 21:51

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

https://twitter.com/England/status/1547924701208461318

# ¿ Jul 15, 2022 13:55

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

What's still to play for in each group

Group A:

Group B:

Group C:

Group D:

# ¿ Jul 15, 2022 19:29

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Norway's manager really is poo poo

# ¿ Jul 15, 2022 20:40

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Terminally Bored posted:

Austria will beat them.

lmao

# ¿ Jul 15, 2022 21:54

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Doctor Teeth posted:

spain really reinforcing the stereotypes so far

I hope they go out in some dramatic fashion

# ¿ Jul 16, 2022 21:22

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

That was a dive. Good VAR decision.

# ¿ Jul 17, 2022 17:23

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Well that didn't take long. France scored after 43 seconds.

# ¿ Jul 18, 2022 20:03

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

My post-group stage Euro 2022 teams revue:

England
The best team in group stages, it's coming home etc. Still have a potential for serious drama in them, like maybe losing to Spain in the quarters.

Austria
Really solid defense-wise. Zadrazil and Feiersinger both looked tired though.

Norway
:lol:

N Ireland
Not bad at all, especially considering half of the squad is semi-professional. Would be 3rd in a different group I reckon.

Germany
All rounders. Didn't hit the highs of England but also look more likely to grind out a result in a difficult match.

Spain
Very uneven. Lots of possession as usual but also some bad defending.

Denmark
Took me a while to realise that Harder was on the pitch in all of their matches.

Finland
Don't remember anything about them.

Sweden
No frills, no fireworks just get things done kinda team. Got better with each match.

Netherlands
Same point tally as Sweden but were rather unconvincing, especially after Miedema came down with Covid.

Switzerland
As usual with the Swiss in football, completely unpredictable. Watching them was fun.

Portugal
Didn't expect much of them but J�ssica Silva was fantastic.

France
Might also win this just with sheer squad strength alone.

Belgium
Don't remember them that much tbh

Iceland
Fought to the end. Another fun to watch team.

Italy
See Norway.

# ¿ Jul 19, 2022 11:06

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

England look shaky so far

# ¿ Jul 20, 2022 20:19

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

Yeah, no shots from England after 30 minutes.

# ¿ Jul 20, 2022 20:29

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# ¿ May 18, 2024 03:48

Terminally Bored: Oct 31, 2011; Twenty-five dollars and a six pack to my name

The heavy pressing seems to have tired Spain out. They can't run anymore.

# ¿ Jul 20, 2022 20:45

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