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Also I'm not even in a relationship and reading that thread title gave me anxiety Is it me he wants to dump???!?
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Jul 10, 2022 23:37
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text her a link to this thread and ask her what "that guy" should do
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Jul 10, 2022 23:38
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If you don't want to become a slovenly rear end in a top hat, you could try going the libertarian crypto guy route. that's sure to drive her away. get really into mining and trading coins, show her charts of things called fartcoin, cumcoin, etc., show her the extremely bad NFT art you're "hodling" that is going to "moon", stuff like that. if you live in a decent country suggest moving to the US for tax purposes, if you already live in the US suggest moving to an extremely lovely state like utah or somethn, also for tax purposes. hint with a wink and a nod that you also want to go to that place also for their "values and politics", etc. you'll be done in no time
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Jul 10, 2022 23:40
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*sigh* yes op I will seduce your girlfriend and take her off your hands. next time I would really appreciate it if you just pm'd me instead of asking in such a roundabout way
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Jul 10, 2022 23:42
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tell her you're looking for a dime, not a nickle, and it's time for a "change." while she's laughing at your clever wordplay, slip out an open window
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Jul 10, 2022 23:45
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maybe some of these ideas could work https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B1V1varByWI
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Jul 10, 2022 23:47
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Just stick it out for a few more years. You never know you might change your mind.
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Jul 10, 2022 23:54
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Mr Interweb posted:yeah it's hosed up but it wasn't intentional. we were almost about to break up a year ago but then she started crying and in order to spare her feelings i told her we could give it a shot for a bit longer How have you been dating someone for over a year but think it's casual and you don't have feelings for them and never have
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Jul 10, 2022 23:54
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I will never look at the nice little corgi the same way again.
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Jul 10, 2022 23:58
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wear bologna instead of clothing. i like to cover myself in rancid honey first.
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Jul 11, 2022 00:05
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tell her that after a long period of soul searching and self-discovery, you've realized that you're actually not into uggos
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Jul 11, 2022 00:29
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tell her you're gay and then make out with me in front of her to prove it
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Jul 11, 2022 00:30
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show her your favorite anime. I'm sure things will take their natural course after that
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Jul 11, 2022 00:31
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watch the classic 2009 romantic comedy "He's Just Not That Into You" together and stare at her the whole time
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Jul 11, 2022 00:33
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explain that you're a proud boy now and you've taken an oath of celibacy to help combat the zionist occupied government
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Jul 11, 2022 00:34
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Your planning on keeping the apartment, aren’t you? Lol
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Jul 11, 2022 00:40
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Tell her you want some kids. If she says "Me too!" say that's great news they're more likely to trust a woman.
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Jul 11, 2022 00:42
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Dang It Bhabhi! posted:wear bologna instead of clothing. i like to cover myself in rancid honey first. Honey doesn't spoil you dummy! Stop giving the OP bad advice this is serious!
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Jul 11, 2022 00:43
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Tell her you're getting a foreskin transplant with skin grafted from your dad. Works really well if he's dead, then you can tell her that you want his ghost to feel what you feel.
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Jul 11, 2022 00:52
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Tell her you're not attracted to her chosen pronouns anymore.
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Jul 11, 2022 00:54
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Tell her that you think how I met your mother and the big bang theory were good sitcoms.
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Jul 11, 2022 00:55
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Tell her you're starting a polycule
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Jul 11, 2022 00:59
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Tell her you're moving to North Korea to teach English. Then move to North Korea.
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Jul 11, 2022 01:02
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let her know you've become completely dilbertpilled. do not elabourate
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Jul 11, 2022 01:02
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hot cocoa on the couch posted:let her know you've become completely dilbertpilled. do not elabourate I take mine back. Do this.
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Jul 11, 2022 01:08
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Grab a gun and head on over to Ukraine. They need people like you asap.
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Jul 11, 2022 01:09
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Say that you’re just heading to the store for a pack of cigarettes. As the front door is closing, mention that your favourite convenience store is located in Delhi. NB. Does not work if you happen to live in the capital of India.
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Jul 11, 2022 01:17
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fake your death op, it's the only way
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Jul 11, 2022 01:23
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Tell her you've developed a weird new fetish, and you absolutely can't get aroused without it. Then if she doesn't want to break up, at least you'll get to try something new.
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Jul 11, 2022 01:25
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Tell her you're suddenly really into vore and then plop your flaccid dick right down into her cereal.
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Jul 11, 2022 01:28
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1) Invent time travel 2) Go back in time and assassinate her grandparents before they can meet 3) Return to the present and live in a world where your relationship never existed 4) Realize that the butterfly effect of killing her grandparents resulted in the spread of a plague far, far worse than covid 5) Consider going back in time again to fix the problem, but then discover that you're already infected. Going back in time now would only result in spreading the plague in the past. 6) The world is doomed because you didn't have the guts to tell your girlfriend you wanted to break up. Way to go, idiot.
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Jul 11, 2022 01:32
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i was not joking about the 'mommy' thing btw
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Jul 11, 2022 01:40
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i really think you shouldn't make any rash decisions maybe feel things out for a couple more years and then revisit
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Jul 11, 2022 01:46
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Mr Interweb posted:i was not joking about the 'mommy' thing btw Record it too. It's good for all parties, especially me.
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Jul 11, 2022 01:46
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Get her the cooking with semen cookbook for the next gift giving milestone. Or just give it as a just because gift.
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Jul 11, 2022 01:49
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Give me her number I'll do it for you.
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Jul 11, 2022 01:49
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have you even tried eating any baked goods made with her menstrual blood and hair yet?
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Jul 11, 2022 01:51
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Mr Interweb posted:i was not joking about the 'mommy' thing btw Good luck mommy
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Jul 11, 2022 01:52
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Mr Interweb posted:i was not joking about the 'mommy' thing btw she's gonna love it and a year from now you'll still be together but she'll be calling you son all the time
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Jul 11, 2022 01:56
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| # ? May 8, 2024 17:03 |
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Tell us how making out with your mommy goes OP
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Jul 11, 2022 01:58
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