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Jul 13, 2022 19:30
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| # ? May 13, 2024 01:13 |
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Buy a bunch of cats at Biglot?
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Jul 13, 2022 19:31
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You’re gonna have to move OP
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Jul 13, 2022 19:31
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lure it back into an eggshell
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Jul 13, 2022 19:34
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Something here will do the job, pick wisely. https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3867570
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Jul 13, 2022 19:34
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 I tried to catch the baby bird in a large fruit bowl but I wasn’t fast enough
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Jul 13, 2022 19:35
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Carry on trying to wipe it up with kitchen roll, looks like it's going well
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Jul 13, 2022 19:35
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we just lost one after three days of recovery it was really sad good luck op, use google lens to find out what kind of bird; insectivores can eat dog or cat kibble with water turned into a slurry, doves and pigeons need formula because they actually feed their young milk made in their bodies
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Jul 13, 2022 19:35
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Chase it around for 10-15 mins and it will be too tired to do anything. It'll then sit in the floor and wait for the sweet release (of outdoors or death, your pick). Birds don't have much stamina.
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Jul 13, 2022 19:45
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Lure it outside with a picture of the pigs huge balls op
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Jul 13, 2022 19:46
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Sid Vicious posted:we just lost one after three days of recovery it was really sad good luck op, use google lens to find out what kind of bird; insectivores can eat dog or cat kibble with water turned into a slurry, doves and pigeons need formula because they actually feed their young milk made in their bodies yeah, i think you want something called 'exact' for young doves/pigeons, but it's been a while. looks a little older than a baby, though, OP. do you have wildlife rehabbers around you who might be able to help you out?
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Jul 13, 2022 19:54
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Throw some cheese balls at it and then get drunk.
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Jul 13, 2022 19:54
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Have you a comically large net, SIr?
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Jul 13, 2022 19:55
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Insanite posted:yeah, i think you want something called 'exact' for young doves/pigeons, but it's been a while. teah Exact is what we got, the poor thing was doing really well but it had a broken foot and it ended up having a seizure and just didnt wake up ):
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Jul 13, 2022 19:57
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^^^ rip small bird.  idk what it is. maybe some swift fledgling?
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Jul 13, 2022 19:58
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capture it in a pokeball and give it to a niece or nephew
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Jul 13, 2022 19:58
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get ready with the Armagnac
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Jul 13, 2022 20:04
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you're supposed to put a tea towel over your head and eat it
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Jul 13, 2022 20:08
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But only after you turn it into a chillidog
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Jul 13, 2022 20:11
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2 Tablespoons Butter 2 Cloves of Garlic, smash and mince 1/2 Cup White wine 1 tablespoon Capers 1/4 lemon Sear in pan, throw in the oven for 20 minutes at 350 or until internal temp reaches 165. Set aside bird to rest. Add butter to pan until melted Deglaze with white wine and add capers Squeeze juice from lemon wedge Salt to taste Reduce until thick enough to coat back of a spoon Plate bird, spoon sauce on top. Serve with a glass of chilled white wine.
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Jul 13, 2022 20:13
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Biohazard posted:2 Tablespoons Butter 1 baby bird 1 pint of beer Throw baby bird into the air a few feet above your head. Lean head back and open mouth. Catch baby bird in mouth and swallow it whole. Chug the pint of beer.
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Jul 13, 2022 20:18
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I don't have a cheeky or funny solution, sorry. Looks like a chimney swift? It's definitely a fledgling, so all you have to really do is coax it out of your house. It's at the stage where it's starting to learn to live on its own with some/minimal parental supervision. Just open a window or door and shoo it out. If it's been in your house for a good amount of time, getting it some water and a check up at a rescue wouldn't be a bad idea, but trying to catch and transport it will just stress it out more.
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Jul 13, 2022 20:19
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Get a brick OP.
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Jul 13, 2022 20:22
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Capture the bird and feed it a fatty diet of crushed acorn and pork forcemeat. Once the bird is sufficiently fattened, drown whole in Armagnac. Pluck the bird and roast with salt, pepper and fines herbes at 350 degrees Fahrenheit for 10 minutes. Once the skin is brown and crisp, serve with a Bordeaux wine. Eat the bird whole while draping a table napkin over your head to prevent the rich aroma of the roast bird from escaping.
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Jul 13, 2022 20:25
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les enfants Terrific! posted:I don't have a cheeky or funny solution, sorry. Looks like a chimney swift? It's definitely a fledgling, so all you have to really do is coax it out of your house. It's at the stage where it's starting to learn to live on its own with some/minimal parental supervision. yeah this. if possible get on the other side of the bird from the open doors/windows and slowly approach it so that it flies away from you and outside
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Jul 13, 2022 20:39
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Put it in a stew?
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Jul 13, 2022 20:39
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Sprinkle salt on its tail feathers.
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Jul 13, 2022 21:03
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Luvcow posted:yeah this. if possible get on the other side of the bird from the open doors/windows and slowly approach it so that it flies away from you and outside turning the lights off in the house, and closing curtains to windows you can't fully open really helps highlight the exits for them too.
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Jul 13, 2022 21:05
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Call him a loving Nonce.
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Jul 13, 2022 21:12
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get married and throw rice in it's direction, then watch it explode.
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Jul 13, 2022 21:53
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steal its cheese
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Jul 13, 2022 21:54
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post more pictures of the bird
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Jul 13, 2022 21:54
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Date it's mother and confuse it by sometimes being a positive male figure in it's life and other times being distant and cold.
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Jul 13, 2022 21:55
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Racist rear end bird
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Jul 13, 2022 22:02
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Train it to bring you money, or to kill people you don't like.
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Jul 13, 2022 22:08
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Keep working to get it out of the house Darken house so it's exit is illuminated
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Jul 13, 2022 22:13
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I'm an ornithologist and once you get to this stage, there's nothing you can do. Once they're in your house and start multiplying you can never get rid of them. It's probably laid thousands of eggs by now
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Jul 13, 2022 22:35
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Why not let it stay, you can go dig worms for free at the park
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Jul 13, 2022 22:46
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Scruffyhawk posted:post more pictures of the bird Yes, further analysis required.
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Jul 13, 2022 22:47
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| # ? May 13, 2024 01:13 |
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Challenge the bird to kumite
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Jul 13, 2022 22:51
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