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Many years ago, Hernan Cortes and his conquistadors brought forth on this Earth a new nation, conceived in the blood of millions of Native Americans, and dedicated to the idea that Spain could make a fuckton of money if they bought a shitton of slaves and forced them to work the vast untouched natural resources of India (North America). As it turns out, two bad things (Spain + genocide) can make something incredibly good: MEXICO. For decades, Mexico was on the cusp of becoming something more than a regional power, what with abundant natural resources, natural beauty, a large population, and a gently caress ton of regional influence. That changed after a myriad of conflicts between the rich and the poor, as well as the Catholics and the atheists, and a subsequent dictatorship essentially smothered the country. Now, Mexico is the downtrodden older brother of Canada and the United States whose most famous exports are alcohol, food, and their own citizens. Since Mexico has repeatedly failed to one-up the perfidious fat American giant, just above and across the border, on the world stage, they've instead decided to one-up their fat American and admittedly-nice Canadian siblings on the most equitable and important field known to man: EL CAMPO DE FÚTBOL by maybe-possibly-potentially winning this time (please god) What, neither Americans nor Canadians give a gently caress about fútbol? Are you loving kidding me? At least we've got los brasileños to argue with, I guess. EL GRUPO: Mexico will be playing in Group C contra los Polacos, los Argentinos, y los Sauditas:  EL ESCUADRÓN:  EL GERENTE: Gerardo "Tata" Martino is the man tasked with coaching the Mexican National Team. Mexican law states that you are legally not allowed to represent Mexico in any way if you are Argentinean, Brasilian, or American, so for the purposes of this World Cup he has been made un mexicano honorario. As a side note, if he fails to secure a win for us, he will be banished from the country. So go, crack open a beer (MODELO), recline that armchair (LA SIESTA), and turn on that TV (TELEMUNDO) - THIS YEAR IS OUR YEAR BROS. VIVA MEXICO!! Legal Notice: Mexican diaspora reserve the right to host insane celebrations in the US states of New York, Illinois, California, Arizona, New Mexico, and Texas should Mexico finally win. The Mexican Government is not responsible for any annoyance or damages caused by the celebrations. Maybe youse would understand if youse guys were good at anything other than that fake 'Football' youse guys play. Joder a los Americanos, viva Mexico B.F. Pinkerton fucked around with this message at 04:43 on Nov 17, 2022 |
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Nov 17, 2022 04:26
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| # ? May 5, 2024 17:06 |
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you forgot mexicos best world cup moment https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i0fRh7NFOUU
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Nov 17, 2022 05:33
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Raul hasnt been the same since he got his skull cracked last year, maybe he's been phoning it in in anticipation of this Also surprised they didnt truck out rafa marquez for one last lap
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Nov 17, 2022 06:54
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Strong contenders for best kit of the tournament imo
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Nov 17, 2022 06:55
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webmeister posted:Strong contenders for best kit of the tournament imo Pretty much perennial winners imo
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Nov 17, 2022 08:04
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It wouldn't surprise me if Mexico don't get out of that group but they were always going to lose in the Round of 16 anyway if they did.
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Nov 17, 2022 10:52
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Sweden send their regards
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Nov 17, 2022 12:05
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deetron69 posted:Raul hasnt been the same since he got his skull cracked last year, maybe he's been phoning it in in anticipation of this Rafa Marquez is too busy laundering money for the Sinaloa Cartel to play in a World Cup
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Nov 17, 2022 16:17
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El Ano indeed
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Nov 17, 2022 16:22
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I recommend stocking up on beer, mezcal, or tequila and drinking heavily as Mexico gets loving destroyed because their back line is bad and Memo Ochoa's reaction times are equal to that of a tortoise. Here's a Mezcal Paloma recipe: Ingredients 2 oz. mezcal 3/4 oz. triple sec 3 oz. grapefruit juice freshly squeezed 1 oz. lime juice freshly squeezed Club soda Ice Grapefruit wedges Instructions Add ice to the cocktail shaker. Pour in the mezcal, triple sec, grapefruit juice, and lime juice. Shake vigorously for 15 seconds. Add ice to a highball or tumbler cocktail glass. Strain the cocktail into the glass. Add a splash of club soda on top. Add grapefruit wedge for garnish
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Nov 18, 2022 00:28
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Everyone knows that the traditional Mexican drink of The Ray Parlour is the Brandy Alexander.
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Nov 18, 2022 00:37
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Eau de MacGowan posted:you forgot mexicos best world cup moment Actually it was sweatpants goalie dad 2? world cups ago
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Nov 18, 2022 01:35
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deetron69 posted:Raul hasnt been the same since he got his skull cracked last year, maybe he's been phoning it in in anticipation of this Jimenez is a fraud and I've never rated him
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Nov 18, 2022 05:40
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Its wild that there is not a single good player in that entire roster, like there have been some dudes on the national team that were absolutely trash, I mean hell German Villa went to a world cup, but this has to be from top to bottom the least talented Mexico team in my lifetime, these loving losers might drop points to Saudi Arabia
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Nov 18, 2022 05:43
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Ah huevo. https://twitter.com/ricardocarino/status/1593507953918808065?s=46&t=36LAWTBv-6FkFCr2T1g6IA
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Nov 18, 2022 17:40
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Mexican fans will feel right at home in Qatar chanting homophobic chants I reckon
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Nov 18, 2022 20:03
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stab posted:Mexican fans will feel right at home in Qatar chanting homophobic chants I reckon EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.....ULO! E: I was born in the US, but I remember watching La Seleccion with my dad. Watching Luis Hernandez, Cuaohtemoc, Jorge Campos. Futbol Mexicano de los 90s era chido, pero esta seleccion le falta algo, yo no se. Nos vamos a perder el quinto partido Okuteru fucked around with this message at 15:22 on Nov 19, 2022 |
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Nov 19, 2022 15:20
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Forceholy posted:EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.....ULO! tssss facts!
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Nov 20, 2022 19:14
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Backdoor Delivery posted:El Ano indeed
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Nov 21, 2022 03:45
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https://twitter.com/masiglory/status/1595113132426338304?s=46&t=M8sHGyD_jQvpIcbJ2Ozycw
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Nov 23, 2022 18:53
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BKws7N8vTrM
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Nov 24, 2022 01:53
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Pues, ahí se queda.
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Nov 27, 2022 03:08
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Canada is gone, the US is hinging on a victory with no strikers against a stout Iran defense. ¿Pero sabes que? A lo menos metieron goles. Uno cade uno, pero todavía. ¿Y nosotros que?
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Nov 27, 2022 19:41
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Backdoor Delivery posted:El Ano indeed
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Nov 27, 2022 21:20
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https://twitter.com/negritotuitero/status/1596665408802766850?s=46&t=oFXpNt2daMFHuvx2KuTzxQ
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Nov 28, 2022 06:15
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Mexican't
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Nov 30, 2022 22:00
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Nov 30, 2022 22:09
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ah jeez, sorry to my Mexican brethren lol
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Nov 30, 2022 22:22
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At least we scored.
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Nov 30, 2022 22:56
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And to think the Mexican FMF did things like suspend promotion/relegation between the top two divisions to favor all the premier clubs there so they could be stronger and yet still achieved this crap-rear end result. Good job administrators!
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Dec 1, 2022 02:29
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https://twitter.com/nocontextfooty/status/1598223678520852486?t=-SDxKS5AQTm13qbeM0RHfg&s=19
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Dec 1, 2022 14:35
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| # ? May 5, 2024 17:06 |
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Mexigoing home.
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Dec 6, 2022 23:42
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