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Lucid Nonsense
Aug 6, 2009

Welcome to the jungle, it gets worse here every day
Last time I was in a bowling alley was when I was at the Bourbon and Beyond fest up in Louisville. It was all the chaos of walking through the crowds and vendors and sideshows. Not in the bowling alley, but at the festival.

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Nooner
Mar 26, 2011

AN A+ OPSTER (:
What was the beyond ? :sissies:

Hyrax Attack!
Jan 13, 2009

We demand to be taken seriously

Nuts and Gum posted:

The only bowling alley within 30 minutes of me is closing soon. Wtf is wrong with WA state?

I think the indoor smoking ban wiped out a lot of them.

Lawman 0
Aug 17, 2010

Bowling owns.

Haptical Sales Slut
Mar 15, 2010

Age 18 to 49

Hyrax Attack! posted:

I think the indoor smoking ban wiped out a lot of them.

That really sucks. If people wanna poison themselves then remove the cosmic bowling and bumpers - lean into 21+ lifestyles. There must be a DDR machine and indoor smoking is required.

Charles Bukowski
Aug 26, 2003

Taskmaster 2023 Second Place Winner

Grimey Drawer
I wish 5 pin was more popular, it's a great game. It's finesse, it's grace, you get to stare at butts and legs with more strain put on them. Wonderful game.

a peck of pickled peckers
Aug 3, 2014

I am your Redeemer! It is by my hand that you arise from the ashes of this world!

I’ve always wanted to like bowling as a social act, and I’ve tried many times, but I’m a pathetic germaphobe and the idea of wearing shoes that other people have worn repulses me. I’m sure they clean them…somehow…but it’s a mental block I’ve been unable to get over.

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag
Candlepin is basically like long skeeball but I don’t remember the last time I saw a candlepin place

Charles Bukowski
Aug 26, 2003

Taskmaster 2023 Second Place Winner

Grimey Drawer

a peck of pickled peckers posted:

I’ve always wanted to like bowling as a social act, and I’ve tried many times, but I’m a pathetic germaphobe and the idea of wearing shoes that other people have worn repulses me. I’m sure they clean them…somehow…but it’s a mental block I’ve been unable to get over.

You can order your own bowling shoes and ball, and insist you only ever throw Your Ball. I have two 5-pin balls that I try to only ever use. Besides germs, you want to get used to the weight so that you're not using incorrect force based.on what you're used to. I went to bowling camp as a kid and I coached some youth bowling. drat shame it's a dying dead sport, leagues are down because people don't want to commit their time every week and pay a few bucks for several hours of fun and competition. We watched people drop out and just sit at home on their rear end instead.

Dunno if youth sports are down in general, but between when I started at 7 and by the time I took over managing the place at 20, we lost every single youth bowler. The kids aged out and none of them became adult bowlers. No kids replaced them. I started in the adult leagues when I was 13, good source of pocketmoney if you're into illegal gambling.

It was awesome to walk out with 50 bucks from a pins over average or high game pot.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

The Bowland has Kids Free Bowling every summer and we signed up every year until this summer when my son aged out. There were always a poo poo load of kids there, so hopefully a few keep on participating. Could be because it’s Florida and it’s goddamned hot and full of old people but our bowling alleys are thriving.

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sc5iTNVEOAg

AARD VARKMAN
May 17, 1993
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BkmZLgM5bsM

GokuGoesSSj69
Apr 15, 2017
Weak people spend 10 dollars to gift titles about world leaders they dislike. The strong spend 10 dollars to gift titles telling everyone to play Deus Ex again

Charles Bukowski posted:

You can order your own bowling shoes and ball, and insist you only ever throw Your Ball. I have two 5-pin balls that I try to only ever use. Besides germs, you want to get used to the weight so that you're not using incorrect force based.on what you're used to. I went to bowling camp as a kid and I coached some youth bowling. drat shame it's a dying dead sport, leagues are down because people don't want to commit their time every week and pay a few bucks for several hours of fun and competition. We watched people drop out and just sit at home on their rear end instead.

Dunno if youth sports are down in general, but between when I started at 7 and by the time I took over managing the place at 20, we lost every single youth bowler. The kids aged out and none of them became adult bowlers. No kids replaced them. I started in the adult leagues when I was 13, good source of pocketmoney if you're into illegal gambling.

It was awesome to walk out with 50 bucks from a pins over average or high game pot.

It's because bowling is really boring, even with alcohol.

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019

GOOSE FUCKER

dsf
Jul 1, 2004
ugh god im not usually too germophobic but now im remembering the time my brother got wings at the bowling alley and was eating them with his fingers after using the alley balls :barf:

Haptical Sales Slut
Mar 15, 2010

Age 18 to 49

a peck of pickled peckers posted:

I’ve always wanted to like bowling as a social act, and I’ve tried many times, but I’m a pathetic germaphobe and the idea of wearing shoes that other people have worn repulses me. I’m sure they clean them…somehow…but it’s a mental block I’ve been unable to get over.

I wonder what the avg bacteria count or whatever is on your fingers after playing with even one shared ball? I usually end up throwing two or three different balls to find the best weight/finger size combo, so I’m sure it’s a cornucopia of lost diseases and I end up rubbing on my face by accident.

Cassette Moodcore
May 4, 2022

I like to take the kid bowling but drat five pin sucks can’t wait till they’re older we can do ten

Panic! At The Tesco
Aug 19, 2005

FART


i was good friends with this kid when i was like 8 - 14 years old or something like that. we lived in the same street and would play video games together and stuff. anyway he was kind of a weird kid, mostly harmless except he was super mean to his mum who was a total pushover. anyway he was super into bowling and played in a league and had his own ball and shoes and stuff. i used to still go hang out at the bowling alley when he played though because they had time crisis 2 and metal slug.

digitalist
Nov 17, 2000

journey into Kirk's unknown


They’re closing the bowling alley

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XjJCt8wOgkg

Cerebral Mayhem
Jul 18, 2000

Very useful on the planet Delphon, where they communicate with their eyebrows
Beer is a performance enhancing drug for me when I bowl, just a couple though. It loosens me up and I'm not so anxious. I got back into bowling about a year ago after I saw this video :https://youtu.be/aFPJf-wKTd0

Wifi Toilet
Oct 1, 2004

Toilet Rascal




















They seem to have a lot of kid's birthday parties, I'd be getting drunk too.

e: drat, Iowa!

Wifi Toilet fucked around with this message at 07:11 on Nov 20, 2022

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe

why would you doxx me like this?

RapturesoftheDeep
Jan 6, 2013

BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:

Candlepin is basically like long skeeball but I don’t remember the last time I saw a candlepin place

I was gonna say that they still have a few in Maryland, but apparently that's duckpin, which is a while other thing? I never actually did it, but it's supposed to be way harder than regular bowling.

There are a bunch of bowling alleys near me, but they are fancy hipster places so it is pretty costly to get drunk in one. Also there are a few in the basements of Catholic churches, which was apparently common back in the 50s.

My favorite bowling memory is going out bowling with a very queeny friend of mine who it turned out was a bowling prodigy and threw 2 simultaneous 200+ games at 2 different alleys.

Charles Bukowski
Aug 26, 2003

Taskmaster 2023 Second Place Winner

Grimey Drawer

GokuGoesSSj69 posted:

It's because bowling is really boring, even with alcohol.

A bowling alley is a bar with an amazing communal game everyone gets up to play every 5 mins. If you can't have fun there you might just be a boring person. I grew up playing bowling, baseball, and golf and bowling is easily the most fun of those.



Also 5 pin rules, gently caress the haters right into the earth. Candlepin and duckpin are variants I've never seen in person, more of an East coast thing.

Charles Bukowski fucked around with this message at 10:06 on Nov 20, 2022

GokuGoesSSj69
Apr 15, 2017
Weak people spend 10 dollars to gift titles about world leaders they dislike. The strong spend 10 dollars to gift titles telling everyone to play Deus Ex again
When I go out to drink with friends I'd rather not have our conversations interrupted by someone having to get up and act like they care about bowling when it's their turn but that's just me.

If you can't carry a conversation and need a game to keep it going you just might be a boring person.

GokuGoesSSj69 fucked around with this message at 10:45 on Nov 20, 2022

GokuGoesSSj69
Apr 15, 2017
Weak people spend 10 dollars to gift titles about world leaders they dislike. The strong spend 10 dollars to gift titles telling everyone to play Deus Ex again
Just look at that map of where most bowling alleys are. Iowa is the most boring place on the face of the earth.

Lots in the known cultural centers of the Dakotas too. Wow! Must be an exciting thing to do! I'd rather take up curling at least you can get into the Olympics with that.

GokuGoesSSj69 fucked around with this message at 10:54 on Nov 20, 2022

Charles Bukowski
Aug 26, 2003

Taskmaster 2023 Second Place Winner

Grimey Drawer
You know Buddy maybe you wanna take a walk and leave these lanes to us? I don't think you care for our fun game.

Go on just get the gently caress out of here

GokuGoesSSj69
Apr 15, 2017
Weak people spend 10 dollars to gift titles about world leaders they dislike. The strong spend 10 dollars to gift titles telling everyone to play Deus Ex again
You can catch me at the Curling Club, which isn't a bar but a Club so if you're invited you get all you want to drink by tipping the person behind the bar. *slides across ice out of the thread*

Zeluth
May 12, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
This ping pong table is sorta like dilly pickle tennis.

Charles Bukowski
Aug 26, 2003

Taskmaster 2023 Second Place Winner

Grimey Drawer
I watched a man drunkenly fall into the gutter once, it owned.

Zeluth
May 12, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
It was only to thwart the other thieves.

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag
I’m the Miller LITE sweater

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019

GOOSE FUCKER

loving dog has loving papers.

Haptical Sales Slut
Mar 15, 2010

Age 18 to 49

kntfkr posted:

loving dog has loving papers.

Lolol

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe

kntfkr posted:

loving dog has loving papers.

Internet Old One
Dec 6, 2021

Coke Adds Life

kntfkr posted:

How do you get home from the bowling alley if you're drunk? The midwest's famed rail system?

Everyone drives drunk and the police sit right out of the parking lot scooping up a few unlucky boozers while the rest escape. Hopefully it’s better now that Lyft is a thing.

Charles Bukowski
Aug 26, 2003

Taskmaster 2023 Second Place Winner

Grimey Drawer
We just wanted a Johnny Cab to drive us around while we drank booze and smoked

SilvergunSuperman
Aug 7, 2010

Cassette Moodcore posted:

I like to take the kid bowling but drat five pin sucks can’t wait till they’re older we can do ten

5 pin is totally fun for kids, adults arguing for it is some lol.

Extra Large Marge
Jan 21, 2004

Fun Shoe

Look at all those states where you can go outside in the winter

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Charles Bukowski
Aug 26, 2003

Taskmaster 2023 Second Place Winner

Grimey Drawer

SilvergunSuperman posted:

5 pin is totally fun for kids, adults arguing for it is some lol.

What, bigger ball and more pins = adult?

That math is fucky, 5 pin rules!

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