Is Santa a Dracula?

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Escape From Noise

He's immortal, having been alive for over 1700 years and only comes out at night. He knows when you've been sleeping, he knows when you're awake (telepathy). He also only enters the houses he's been invited into.

Pretty spoopy IMO.

Thank you Pot Smoke Pheonnix for this Kickin' Rad sig

# ? Dec 11, 2022 15:50

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# ? May 12, 2024 18:25

Escape From Noise

Don't forget the army of familiars who obey his every command without question or pay.

# ? Dec 11, 2022 15:52

your friend sk: (ヤイケス!)

can a dracula eat cookies and milk?

Join the BYOB Army

^{thank you again Saoshyant!!}

# ? Dec 11, 2022 15:55

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

are you suggesting that santa drinks our blood?

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# ? Dec 11, 2022 15:58

Prurient Squid: Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.

Nosfereefer posted:

are you suggesting that santa drinks our blood?

He drinks coke apparently.

# ? Dec 11, 2022 16:11

Escape From Noise

"In the Middle Ages, milk was called the "virtuous white liquor" because alcoholic beverages were safer to consume than the water generally available.[39] Incorrectly thought to be blood diverted from the womb to the breast, it was also known as "white blood", and treated like blood for religious dietary purposes and in humoral theory."

# ? Dec 11, 2022 16:16

Viginti Septem: Oculus Noctuae

I saw mommy neck romancing Santa clause

# ? Dec 11, 2022 16:27

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

Prurient Squid posted:

He drinks coke apparently.

troubling

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# ? Dec 11, 2022 16:44

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

santa claus - satan count

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# ? Dec 11, 2022 16:46

Escape From Noise

I mean he hangs out with this guy.

# ? Dec 11, 2022 16:49

Buttchocks: No, I like my hat, thanks.

Does santa go into torpor the rest of the year?

# ? Dec 11, 2022 17:52

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

we've discussed this already he's a huge fat bread bowl filled w/ immortal blood. sheesh :rolleyes:

# ? Dec 12, 2022 04:17

Escape From Noise

Areola Grande posted:

we've discussed this already he's a huge fat bread bowl filled w/ immortal blood. sheesh

He's actually a cursed sandwich.

# ? Dec 12, 2022 04:29

google THIS

He did set up his headquarters in a location where night lasts six months

# ? Dec 12, 2022 17:39

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

okay so what if polar bears aren't real. what if every time you hear "some dumb tourists got gutted by polar bears", they were actually harvested by the claus?

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# ? Dec 12, 2022 17:50

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

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# ? Dec 12, 2022 17:52

Kaiser Schnitzel: Schnitzel mit uns

Nosfereefer posted:

okay so what if polar bears aren't real. what if every time you hear "some dumb tourists got gutted by polar bears", they were actually harvested by the claus?

Santa claws

https://i.imgur.com/R8ctked.mp4
ty Manifisto for this wonderful sig!

# ? Dec 12, 2022 17:52

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

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# ? Dec 12, 2022 17:53

Viginti Septem: Oculus Noctuae

Kaiser Schnitzel posted:

Santa claws

Hm, you provided both subject and predicate. That makes your post the Santa clause.

# ? Dec 12, 2022 18:32

Chrs

explains all of those �santa stop here� signs people put up in their yards

(draculas cannot enter your house without being invited in)

# ? Dec 13, 2022 02:01

sb hermit

yeah, op

# ? Dec 13, 2022 09:36

sb hermit

santa keeps exhaustive lists of his protectees because vampires are meticulous

# ? Dec 13, 2022 09:38

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# ? May 12, 2024 18:25

sb hermit

rudolph's true origin story was to turn santa into ash and rescue the world from rampant consumerism and destruction of natural resources but santa was too strong and now rudolph must further the goals of western christian values that run counter to his original life's purpose

there is no magic reindeer that can save humanity. humanity must make the effort to save itself.

# ? Dec 13, 2022 09:43

The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > Is Santa a Dracula?