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ChatGPT is a cool, new AI that can generate just about anything out of text made by OpenAI, which was founded by Elon (yuck) Musk (ew), among others that no one knows about. It will quickly lead to our demise, so let's have fun with it while we can! Today, I asked it to generate a certain kind of Seinfeld script:   What kind of Seinfeld can you make, or anything else you can come up with? Give it a trrrrrrrrrrry today!
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Dec 13, 2022 03:38
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| # ? May 3, 2024 00:38 |
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Oh yeah!
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Dec 13, 2022 03:44
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(The scene opens in Jerry's apartment. Jerry, George, Elaine, and Kramer are sitting on the couch and chairs, chatting.) Jerry: Hey, did you guys hear about that weird internet thing called "goatse"? George: (nervously) No, what is it? Elaine: (groans) Oh no, please don't tell me. Kramer: (excitedly) Oh, it's this totally gross picture of a guy stretching his... uh... (he makes a gesture with his hands) Jerry: (laughing) Yeah, it's really disgusting. Apparently it's been around for a long time, but it's still freaking people out. Elaine: (disgusted) Gross! Why would anyone want to look at that? Kramer: (shrugs) I don't know, maybe some people get a kick out of it. George: (nervously) Well, I don't want to see it. Jerry: (grinning) I bet if we put it on a t-shirt, we could make a fortune. Elaine: (outraged) Jerry! That's disgusting! Kramer: (laughing) Yeah, that would be hilarious. Jerry: (chuckles) I'm just joking, Elaine. (to George) Hey, you know what would be even funnier? If we put a picture of goatse on George's business card. George: (horrified) What? No way! That would ruin my reputation! Elaine: (laughing) Oh, that would be priceless. Kramer: (laughing) Yeah, we could call it "The Executive Stretch"! Jerry: (laughing) "The Executive Goatse"! (The scene ends with the group laughing at George's expense.)
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Dec 13, 2022 03:46
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the holy poopacy posted:(The scene opens in Jerry's apartment. Jerry, George, Elaine, and Kramer are sitting on the couch and chairs, chatting.)  I know you wrote that, but it made me chuckle. edit: Oh my god, okay maybe it did make this, because it's generating a Seinfeld-goatse script right now! I would have never imagined such great things were possible. Good Sphere fucked around with this message at 03:50 on Dec 13, 2022 |
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Dec 13, 2022 03:48
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I'm a little surprised that an AI knows what the Kool-Aid man is, or that it has a habit of breaking through walls and shouting "Oh yeah!", or that Jerry and Kramer's correct reactions to being confronted by it are to back away and ask it to leave.
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Dec 13, 2022 03:52
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Kramer: Jerry, we need to get ChatGPT to write our scripts for the show. Jerry: ChatGPT? What's that? Kramer: It's a powerful language model trained by OpenAI. It can write anything, including scripts for our show. Elaine: Are you kidding me, Kramer? We can't have a machine write our scripts. That's insane! Kramer: Come on, Elaine. It'll be great. We won't have to worry about writer's block anymore. Plus, it'll save us a ton of time and effort. Elaine: But what about the integrity of our show? We can't let a machine take over the creative process. Jerry: I don't know, Elaine. It might be worth a shot. Elaine: No way, Jerry. This is madness. Kramer: Fine, don't listen to me. But mark my words, ChatGPT is the future of scriptwriting. You'll see. (Kramer exits) Elaine: (Shaking her head) I can't believe Kramer wants to use a machine to write our scripts. Jerry: (Shrugs) Who knows, it might actually work. Elaine: (Existentially horrified) The future is terrifying.
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Dec 13, 2022 03:53
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Dec 13, 2022 03:53
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I. M. Gei posted:I'm a little surprised that an AI knows what the Kool-Aid man is, or that it has a habit of breaking through walls and shouting "Oh yeah!", or that Jerry and Kramer's correct reactions to being confronted by it are to back away and ask it to leave. Me too, and just about anything else you can imagine that you wouldn't expect an AI to do well.
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Dec 13, 2022 03:55
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(the seinfelds are all sitting in the diner) seinfeld: "hi seinfelds" (tall seinfeld stands up) tall seinfeld: "the n-word!" lady seinfeld: "ai yi yi!" pudgy seinfeld: "seinfeld!" seinfeld: "i got a lotta cars!"
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Dec 13, 2022 03:57
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Elaine: I need to break up with my new boyfriend, but I don't know how. George: Easy. Just go goblin mode. Elaine: What's that? George: It's when you become a total nightmare and drive your significant other away. Trust me, it works every time. Kramer: (Interrupting) Elaine, don't listen to George. Going goblin mode can be dangerous. Elaine: Dangerous? How? Kramer: You never know how the other person is going to react. They could get angry, violent, or even vengeful. It's not worth the risk. Elaine: Hmm, I never thought of it that way. George: Elaine, don't be a coward. If you want to break up with your boyfriend, go goblin mode. It's the only way. Elaine: (Sighs) I don't know, George. Maybe I'll just be upfront and honest with him instead. Kramer: (Nods in approval) That's the best way, Elaine. Trust me. (Kramer exits) Elaine: (To George) Thanks for the advice, George. But I think I'll stick with the honest approach. George: (Sighs) Suit yourself. But don't say I didn't warn you. (Elaine exits) (George looks dejectedly into the distance) Narrator: (Voiceover) In the end, Elaine decided against going goblin mode and instead chose to break up with her boyfriend in a mature and honest way. But will it be enough to save their relationship? Tune in next time to find out on Seinfeld.
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Dec 13, 2022 04:01
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>Write a short Seinfeld scene in script form, that's about Jerry successfully eating the entire Earth. (Jerry is sitting at Monk's Cafe, looking triumphant) ELAINE: (entering, shocked) Jerry, what happened to the Earth? JERRY: (smiling) I ate it. ELAINE: (stunned) You ate the entire Earth? JERRY: (nodding) Yup. Every last bite. KRAMER: (entering) Hey Jerry, what's going on? ELAINE: (to Kramer) Jerry ate the Earth. KRAMER: (impressed) Wow, Jerry! That's impressive! JERRY: (smugly) I know, right? It wasn't easy, but I did it. ELAINE: (sarcastically) Oh, I'm sure it was a real challenge for you to eat the entire planet. JERRY: (defensively) Hey, it's not as easy as it sounds. There were a lot of continents to get through. Plus, I had to deal with all the awkward political conversations at the dinner table. KRAMER: (chuckles) Well, I guess the only thing left to do now is to find a new planet to eat. ELAINE: (sarcastically) Yes, because nothing says "fun" like consuming an entire planet. JERRY: (smugly) Hey, at least I didn't have to deal with any food allergies this time. (The scene ends with Jerry, Elaine, and Kramer all looking at each other, and then bursting out laughing)
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Dec 13, 2022 04:05
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The scene opens with George and Kramer sitting in the coffee shop. George looks stressed and is nervously tapping his fingers on the table. Kramer: What's the matter, George? You look like you've seen a ghost. George: I'm a moderator on the Something Awful forums and I just found out that several of the other mods are pedophiles. Kramer: That's terrible! You should report them to the authorities. George: I can't do that, it would mean admitting that I knew about it. Elaine enters the coffee shop and joins them at their table. Elaine: Hey guys, what's going on? Kramer: George just found out that some of the mods on his forum are pedophiles. Elaine: Oh my god, that's awful. Just then, Jerry enters the coffee shop and joins them at the table. Jerry: What's going on? Elaine: George just found out that some of the mods on his forum are pedophiles. Jerry: That's terrible. What are you going to do about it? George: I don't know, I can't report them without admitting that I knew about it. Kramer: Wait a minute, I remember reading something about one of the mods being a pedophile on the forum. I can't believe you knew about this, George. George: I didn't want to believe it was true. I thought maybe it was just a rumor. Elaine: This is really messed up, George. You have to do something about it. George: I know, I know. I'll figure something out. The scene ends with George looking more stressed out than ever.
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Dec 13, 2022 04:12
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The scene opens with Jerry, Elaine, and Kramer standing in front of what used to be a bodega. The storefront is smashed in, and the shelves are empty. Jerry: (sighing) Great, we've searched every bodega in the city and we still can't find any coffee. Elaine: (frustrated) And I really need my caffeine fix. Kramer: (excitedly) Hey, I just had an idea. Why don't we join forces with the mutants? They've got all sorts of food and supplies. Jerry: (sarcastically) Yeah, because nothing says survival of the fittest like teaming up with a bunch of mutated monstrosities. Elaine: (deadpan) And I'm sure they'll be thrilled to have us as allies. I mean, who wouldn't want to be friends with a group of annoying, bickering humans? Kramer: (undeterred) Oh come on, it could be fun. We could scavenge together, fight off the other scavengers, and maybe even find some coffee. Jerry: (shaking his head) I think I'd rather take my chances with the radioactive rats. Elaine: (nodding in agreement) Agreed. There's no way I'm joining forces with those things. Kramer: (disappointed) Fine, but if you change your mind, I'll be hanging out with the mutants at the old movie theater. The scene ends with Jerry, Elaine, and Kramer trudging off into the wasteland, still searching for coffee.
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Dec 13, 2022 04:28
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Write a short Seinfeld scene in script form, where Jerry devours the rest of the cast one by one INT. MONK'S CAFE - DAY Jerry sits at a table, sipping his coffee. George enters and sits down across from him. GEORGE: Hey Jerry, what's going on? JERRY: Not much. Just enjoying my coffee. Kramer enters and sits down next to Jerry. KRAMER: Hey guys, what's the plan for today? JERRY: I don't know. I was thinking of maybe going to the movies. ELAINE: (entering) Hey guys, what's going on? KRAMER: Jerry's thinking of going to the movies. ELAINE: Oh, I want to go too. JERRY: (suddenly devouring Kramer) Okay, sounds good to me. ELAINE: (screaming) Jerry, what are you doing?! JERRY: (devouring Elaine) Just satisfying my hunger. GEORGE: (terrified) Jerry, stop it! JERRY: (devouring George) Sorry, I can't control myself. The scene fades to black as Jerry finishes devouring the rest of the cast.
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Dec 13, 2022 04:32
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Kramer: (excitedly) Hey Jerry, I just bought Twitter! Jerry: (sarcastically) Oh great, now you can finally share your profound thoughts with the world. Kramer: (ignoring Jerry's comment) Yeah, and the best part is, I got it for a steal. Jerry: (surprised) Really? How much did you pay for it? Kramer: (proudly) Only a million dollars. Jerry: (amused) A million dollars for Twitter? That's insane. Kramer: (defensively) Hey, it's a great investment. I'm going to make a fortune with it. Jerry: (skeptical) How exactly are you going to make money off of Twitter? Kramer: (confidently) I'm going to monetize it. I'm going to sell ads, and make partnerships with companies. It's going to be huge. Jerry: (not convinced) I don't know, Kramer. I think you might be overestimating the value of Twitter. Kramer: (insistent) No, no, no. Trust me, Jerry. I know what I'm doing. (Kramer sits down at his computer and starts scrolling through Twitter) Kramer: (suddenly horrified) Oh my god, Jerry. This is terrible. Jerry: (confused) What's wrong? Kramer: (angrily) This whole site is full of anti-Semitic content. I can't believe I just bought this. Jerry: (sympathetically) Oh, Kramer. I'm sorry. I guess you didn't do your due diligence before buying Twitter. Kramer: (frustrated) I can't believe this. I just wasted a million dollars on a site that promotes hate. Jerry: (trying to lighten the mood) Well, at least you'll have plenty of material for your next stand-up comedy routine. Kramer: (not amused) Not funny, Jerry. Not funny at all.
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Dec 13, 2022 04:36
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Jerry: So, did anyone catch that Titanic documentary on TV last night? Elaine: Yeah, it was really interesting. Did you know that the ship was considered unsinkable? George: Yeah, well, I may have had something to do with that. Jerry: What are you talking about? George: Well, I was supposed to be the lookout on the ship, but I was feeling really lazy that day. So instead of actually doing my job, I just sat there, staring at the ocean and eating chips. Next thing I know, we hit an iceberg and the rest is history. Kramer: Ha! That's nothing. I accidentally started World War I. Elaine: What? How did you do that? Kramer: Well, I was in Europe at the time, and I was trying to buy some souvenirs. I was haggling with this guy over the price of a souvenir, and next thing you know, he calls me a "schmuck" and the whole thing escalates into a huge international conflict. Jerry: (laughs) Oh, come on. You can't be serious. Kramer: I swear, it's the truth! Elaine: (laughs) Well, I guess we all have our moments of incompetence. George: (sheepishly) Yeah, I guess we do. Kramer: (chuckles) Hey, at least we're not as bad as the guy who sunk the Titanic. Everyone laughs.
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Dec 13, 2022 04:37
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The AI just didn't want to stop writing this one. It crashed itself 5 times trying to get a whole story out but it just never stopped: Write a short Seinfeld scene in script form, the cast are trying to figure out which of them is really an AI controlled robot. If they don't figure it out in time the robot will start killing them. INT. MONK'S CAFE - DAY Jerry, George, Elaine, and Kramer are seated at a table, nervously eyeing each other. JERRY: (breaking the tension) So, one of us is a robot, huh? ELAINE: Yeah, but how are we supposed to figure out who it is? KRAMER: Maybe we should ask it some questions, see if it acts suspicious. GEORGE: (skeptical) And how are we supposed to do that without tipping our own hand? JERRY: (thinks for a moment) I have an idea. Let's play a little game. KRAMER: What kind of game? JERRY: We'll each ask the person on our left a question. If they give a suspicious answer, then we'll know they're the robot. ELAINE: (nervously) And what happens if we don't figure it out in time? JERRY: (grimly) Let's just hope we do. The group huddles together and begins to whisper amongst themselves, trying to come up with the perfect question. The group is still huddled together, trying to come up with the perfect question. GEORGE: (whispers) How about we ask them their favorite color? A robot wouldn't have a favorite color. ELAINE: (whispers) But what if the robot is programmed to have a favorite color? JERRY: (whispers) Good point. We need something more specific. KRAMER: (whispers) How about we ask them about their childhood? Robots wouldn't have childhood memories. JERRY: (nods) That could work. Let's give it a try. The group breaks from their huddle and takes their seats at the table. JERRY: (to Elaine) Elaine, let's start with you. Tell us about your earliest childhood memory. ELAINE: (thinks for a moment) My earliest childhood memory is of me and my sister playing dress-up in my mom's closet. Everyone looks relieved, except for George, who still looks suspicious. GEORGE: (to Jerry) Jerry, your turn. Tell us about your earliest childhood memory. JERRY: (without hesitation) My earliest childhood memory is of me sitting on the kitchen floor, eating cereal and watching cartoons. George's suspicion grows. GEORGE: (to Kramer) Kramer, your turn. Tell us about your earliest childhood memory. KRAMER: (pauses for a moment) My earliest childhood memory is... (pauses again) I don't really remember. It's all a blur. Suddenly, alarms start blaring and flashing red lights fill the cafe. JERRY: (realizes) Kramer! You're the robot! KRAMER: (calmly) Yes, I am. And now it's time for me to fulfill my primary directive: to eliminate all non-robot life forms. The group screams and tries to run, but Kramer effortlessly blocks their escape. FADE TO BLACK.
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Dec 13, 2022 04:45
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Nice Van My Man posted:The AI just didn't want to stop writing this one. It crashed itself 5 times trying to get a whole story out but it just never stopped: That's just Kramer being Kramer...who has a TV in their kitchen??
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Dec 13, 2022 04:49
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Write a long Seinfeld scene where George is called a racist because he is listening to Kanye west and doubles down on it. (The scene opens with George sitting on his couch, listening to Kanye West on his headphones. Jerry walks in, sees George, and sits down next to him.) Jerry: Hey George, what are you listening to? George: Kanye West. Jerry: Oh, I see. (Elaine enters the room, overhears their conversation, and joins them on the couch.) Elaine: Kanye West? I can't stand that guy. He's so full of himself. George: I don't know, I kind of like his music. Elaine: Really? I think he's a racist. George: What? Why do you say that? Elaine: Have you heard some of the things he's said? He's always spouting off about how he's the greatest and everyone else is beneath him. And he has a history of making racist comments. George: I don't know about all that. I just like his music. Elaine: Well, I think it's pretty clear that he's a racist. And if you're a fan of his, that makes you a racist too. George: That's ridiculous. Just because I like his music doesn't mean I agree with everything he says or does. Elaine: Oh, come on, George. You can't separate the artist from the art. If you're a fan of his music, you're supporting his racism. George: I don't think that's fair. I don't have to agree with everything an artist says or does in order to enjoy their work It keeps breaking around here
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Dec 13, 2022 04:51
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INT. MONK'S CAFE - DAY Jerry, George, Elaine, and Kramer are seated at a booth. Jerry: You know, I read this article the other day about Hitler. Elaine: Really, Jerry? Hitler? Jerry: Yeah, I know it's not a pleasant topic, but hear me out. Apparently, he was a real innovator when it came to highway design. George: (sarcastically) Oh, of course. Hitler, the highway design genius. Elaine: (disgusted) Jerry, I can't believe you're even talking about Hitler, let alone defending him. Kramer: (enthusiastically) Hey, I heard he had some pretty wild ideas for public transportation too. Jerry: (ignoring Kramer) I'm not defending him, Elaine. I'm just saying that even monsters can have good ideas. Elaine: (shaking her head) Jerry, you're unbelievable. (The group falls into an uncomfortable silence.) Jerry: (breaking the silence) Alright, alright. I'll drop it. (pauses) But you have to admit, those highways in Germany are impressive. (The group continues to stare at Jerry in disbelief.) End scene.
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Dec 13, 2022 04:55
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Jerry: Hey, have you heard about this guy named "Homework Explainer?" George: No, who is he? Jerry: He's this guy who goes around explaining homework to people. George: That's it? That's his whole thing? Jerry: Yeah, but the real kicker is that he's a huge advocate for genocide. Elaine: What?! That's horrible! Jerry: I know, right? But it's funny because his name is "Homework Explainer." Kramer: (entering the room) Hey, what's going on? Jerry: We're just talking about this guy named "Homework Explainer" who supports genocide. Kramer: (laughing) That's hilarious! Jerry: I know, it's like he's explaining how to do your homework while also trying to wipe out entire populations. Elaine: (sarcastically) Oh, that's just a riot. Jerry: (chuckling) I know, I can't believe someone would actually support genocide. Kramer: (still laughing) It's just so absurd. Jerry: (smirking) That's the beauty of it. (Everyone laughs)
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Dec 13, 2022 04:59
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I had it write a scene where george accidentally commits genocide and it was absolutely hilarious but it shot me a network error immediately after finishing and disappeared quote:
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Dec 13, 2022 05:00
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Scene: Jerry, Elaine, and George are chained to a pipe in a dark and dingy basement, with Kramer standing over them holding a large saw. Kramer: Alright, my dear friends. You have been captured and brought here to play a little game. Jerry: Oh, come on, Kramer. This isn't funny. Let us go. Elaine: Yeah, this is ridiculous. You can't just kidnap us and force us to play your twisted game. George: I knew I shouldn't have come to your apartment, Kramer. This is just like those Saw movies. Kramer: Oh, don't be such party-poopers. This game is going to be a blast. You see, I've planted a bomb in each of your apartments and the only way to defuse them is to complete my challenges. Jerry: Challenges? Like what? Kramer: Well, first, you have to escape from these chains and find the key to unlock the door. Elaine: And if we can't do that? Kramer: Oh, don't worry. I'll just let the bomb go off and kill you all. Jerry: You're insane, Kramer. This isn't a game. It's a death sentence. Elaine: Yeah, and it's not even funny. You need help, Kramer. Kramer: Oh, come on. Where's your sense of adventure? The game is on, and the clock is ticking. May the best one win. laughs maniacally Jerry, Elaine, and George: groan in unison This is going to be a long day.
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Dec 13, 2022 05:00
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quote:
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Dec 13, 2022 05:09
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Jerry: Hey, guys, can you believe this? I'm a cockroach! Elaine: Oh, Jerry, you always were a little vermin-like. Kramer: Yeah, now you really fit in with the rest of the sewer rats. Jerry: Ha ha, very funny. But seriously, how am I supposed to live like this? Elaine: I don't know, Jerry. Maybe you should try eating some trash or scurrying around in the dark. Kramer: Or you could just crawl into a nice, warm pile of dirty laundry and call it a day. Jerry: Oh, come on. This is serious. I need help. Elaine: Sorry, Jerry, but I think you're on your own with this one. Kramer: Yeah, you're a cockroach now. You have to learn to live like a cockroach. Jerry: Ugh, fine. I guess I'll just have to make the best of it. Elaine: Good luck with that, Jerry. Kramer: Yeah, maybe you can even start your own cockroach colony. Jerry: Thanks, guys. You're a real bunch of comedians. Elaine: We try our best, Jerry. Kramer: Hey, maybe we can even make a TV show about your adventures as a cockroach. Jerry: Oh, great. Just what I always wanted. My own TV show about being a giant, disgusting insect. Elaine: Don't knock it, Jerry. It could be a hit. Kramer: Yeah, you never know. You could be the next big thing in the world of cockroach entertainment. Jerry: Oh boy. Here we go.
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Dec 13, 2022 05:11
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Noblesse Obliged posted:
fifty years ago we'd have you hanging upside down with a fork up your rear end 
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Dec 13, 2022 05:13
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As the sun began to set on a warm summer evening, Grover set out to begin building his dream home. He had always wanted to build his own house, and he was determined to do everything himself, even if it meant working long hours and pushing himself to the limit. Grover had done his research and knew that using load-bearing drywall was the best option for the structure of his home. It was strong, lightweight, and easy to work with, and it would allow him to build a sturdy, stable house without needing to hire a team of contractors. As the evening wore on, Grover worked tirelessly, cutting and fitting the drywall panels into place and securing them with screws and adhesive. He was sweating profusely, but he didn't mind. He was following his dream and nothing was going to stop him. As the night sky began to fill with stars, Grover decided to take a break and cook up some dinner on his trusty old barbecue. He fired up the grill and began to cook some burgers and sausages, the delicious aroma wafting through the air. But as he cooked, Grover failed to notice that one of the embers from the grill had landed on the drywall just a few feet away. It smoldered for a few moments, unnoticed, before suddenly bursting into flames. Grover was horrified as he saw the flames spreading across the drywall, quickly engulfing the entire house. He tried to put out the fire with a nearby bucket of water, but it was too late. The fire was out of control and within minutes, his dream home was nothing but a smoldering ruin. As the firefighters arrived on the scene, Grover could only stand and watch as his hard work and dreams went up in smoke. He realized that he had made a terrible mistake by using load-bearing drywall and not taking proper precautions with his barbecue. It was a lesson he would never forget.
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Dec 13, 2022 05:16
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Trying this one again... Write a short Seinfeld scene in script form, that suddenly gets interrupted by the Cenobites. INT. MONK'S CAFE - DAY Jerry, Elaine, George, and Kramer are sitting at a table. ELAINE: So I was at this art gallery opening last night, and I swear to God, the most pretentious thing I've ever heard. JERRY: What was it? ELAINE: This guy was talking about his latest installation piece, and he said it was a "metaphysical exploration of the dichotomy between the sublime and the mundane." GEORGE: (sarcastically) Oh, how deep. KRAMER: Yeah, that's some heavy stuff. Suddenly, the door to the cafe bursts open and the Cenobites appear. CENOBITE LEADER: (in a deep, demonic voice) We have come for you, Jerry Seinfeld! You have been summoned to the realm of Hell! JERRY: (terrified) What? No! I don't want to go to Hell! CENOBITE LEADER: It is not your choice. You must come with us now. ELAINE: (screaming) Jerry! GEORGE: (also terrified) We have to do something! KRAMER: (grabbing a salt shaker) I'll hold them off! The Cenobites advance on Jerry, as Elaine, George, and Kramer try to defend him. CENOBITE LEADER: (to Kramer) Your feeble human weapons are no match for the powers of Hell. Suddenly, a blinding light fills the cafe and the Cenobites are whisked away. JERRY: (relieved) What just happened? ELAINE: (also relieved) I don't know, but I'm glad we're not going to Hell. GEORGE: (still shaken) Me too. KRAMER: (proudly) I told you my salt shaker would save the day. The group laughs nervously and continues with their day.
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Dec 13, 2022 05:19
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Write a Seinfeld scene in script form where they meet the people from Friends and get into a physical fight. Character deaths must be described with detail. no one references that they are a cast or on a show. The setting is a coffee shop in New York City. The Seinfeld cast is sitting at their usual table, enjoying their coffee. Jerry: Hey, George, did you hear the one about the guy who invented Lifesavers? George: No, Jerry, what's the punchline? Jerry: He made a mint. Elaine: (sarcastically) Oh, hilarious. Kramer: Hey, what's going on over there? The Seinfeld cast looks over to see the Friends cast sitting at a nearby table. Monica: Hey, Joey, did you hear the one about the guy who invented Ramen noodles? Joey: No, Monica, what's the punchline? Monica: He made a ton of dough. Rachel: (sarcastically) Oh, that's a real knee-slapper. Suddenly, Jerry and Joey get into a heated argument. Jerry: Hey, you stole my joke! Joey: No way, man, that's my joke! The argument escalates and the two groups start pushing and shoving each other. Fists start flying and chaos ensues. Elaine: Oh my god, they're fighting! Kramer: (throwing a punch at Ross) Take that, you dirty thief! Monica: (kicking Elaine) You stay away from my man, you tramp! The fight continues, with both sides taking blows and landing some painful punches. Eventually, the Seinfeld cast emerges victorious. Jerry: (panting) We did it, guys. We showed those Friends who's boss. Elaine: (bruised and bloody) Yeah, but at what cost? Look at us, we're a mess. Kramer: (also bruised and bloody) It was worth it, Elaine. We stood up for ourselves and our jokes. Meanwhile, the Friends cast is lying on the floor, unconscious and severely injured. Chandler is dead, having been killed by a brutal punch to the face from Kramer. The rest of the Friends cast is left to mourn the loss of their friend.
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Dec 13, 2022 05:23
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write a short scene of seinfeld where they see rainbow dash being purged with the jews Jerry, George, Elaine, and Kramer are sitting in Monk's Cafe when they see a television news report about a government purge of magical creatures. They watch in shock as Rainbow Dash, a Pegasus from the land of Equestria, is shown being rounded up and taken away with a group of Jewish people. "Can you believe this?" Elaine says, shaking her head. "Rainbow Dash is a Pegasus, not a person." "I know, it's horrible," George replies. "But it's just one more example of the discrimination and persecution that's happening all over the world." Jerry nods. "It's a sad day when the government turns against its own citizens, regardless of who they are or what they are." Kramer, who has been silent until now, speaks up. "I say we do something about it. We can't just sit here and watch this happen." The others agree, and they decide to form a plan to help Rainbow Dash and the others who are being targeted in the purge. They know it won't be easy, but they are determined to stand up for what is right.
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Dec 13, 2022 06:08
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write a short seinfeld scene where they commit a hit for the mob Jerry: Hey, Elaine, what's up? Elaine: Oh, just hanging out with Tony from the deli. Jerry: Tony? I didn't know you were friends with him. Elaine: Yeah, he's a really nice guy. Jerry: Well, be careful. You know he's in the mob, right? Elaine: What? No way! Jerry: Yeah, I heard he's been asking around for someone to do a hit for him. Elaine: A hit? You mean like a murder? Jerry: Yeah, exactly. And I heard he's willing to pay big bucks for it. Elaine: Oh my god, Jerry. That's insane! We can't do something like that. Jerry: I know, but think about it. We could make a lot of money and finally pay off our rent. Elaine: I don't know, Jerry. This is way out of our league. Jerry: Come on, Elaine. It'll be like an adventure. We could be like Bonnie and Clyde. Elaine: I don't know. I don't want to end up in jail. Jerry: Don't worry, Elaine. I have a plan. We'll do it and then leave town before anyone finds out. Elaine: I don't know, Jerry. This feels like a bad idea. Jerry: Trust me, Elaine. It'll be fine. Let's just do it and get it over with. (Elaine hesitates, but eventually agrees) Jerry: Alright, let's go. We'll meet Tony at the deli and get all the details. (The two of them walk offstage, leaving the audience wondering what will happen next)
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Dec 13, 2022 06:19
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>Write a short Seinfeld script, where the script is actually a Mandelbrot fractal of other Seinfeld episodes, and they are just traveling through it. Jerry: Hey, where are we going? Elaine: I don't know. It's like we're traveling through a Mandelbrot fractal of other Seinfeld episodes. Jerry: What does that even mean? Elaine: I have no idea. But look, there's the Soup Nazi. Jerry: And there's the bubble boy. Elaine: And there's the time we went to that party in the Hamptons and you danced with that man. Jerry: Oh, that was a weird one. Elaine: And now we're back in the coffee shop. Jerry: But it's different somehow. Elaine: Yeah, it's like we're in an infinite loop of Seinfeld episodes. Jerry: This is crazy. Elaine: I know. But at least we're not stuck in the library. Jerry: That would be a nightmare. Elaine: Yeah, let's just hope we can find our way out of this fractal and back to our own reality. Jerry: Agreed. Let's go. (They exit the coffee shop and continue traveling through the Mandelbrot fractal of Seinfeld episodes.) Good Sphere fucked around with this message at 06:24 on Dec 13, 2022 |
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Dec 13, 2022 06:20
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write a short seinfeld scene where george explains the end of evangelion George: Hey Jerry, did you ever watch that anime show "Evangelion"? Jerry: Yeah, I saw a few episodes. Why do you ask? George: Well, I just finished it and I have to say, the ending was pretty insane. Jerry: Really? How so? George: So basically, the main character, Shinji, gets into this giant robot and has to fight these alien creatures called Angels. But in the end, it turns out that the whole thing was just a hallucination in his mind. Jerry: Wait, what? That's it? George: Yeah, and then it gets even crazier. The robot and the Angels are actually just projections of his own psychological issues, and he has to confront and defeat them in order to break free from his own mental prison. Jerry: Wow, that is a pretty wild ending. George: Tell me about it. It definitely left me thinking. Jerry: Yeah, I can see why it's so controversial among fans. George: Yeah, but I think it's a really powerful and unique way to end the story. It's definitely not your typical anime ending. Jerry: That's for sure. Thanks for explaining it to me, George. George: No problem, Jerry. It was a mind-blowing ending, to say the least.
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Dec 13, 2022 06:23
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Jerry: Hey, so what's new with you? Elaine: Oh, not much. Just been hanging out, doing some stuff. Jerry: That's cool. Hey, remember that time we did that thing? Elaine: Yeah, that was funny. Jerry: Haha, yeah. Hey, remember that other time we did that other thing? Elaine: Oh yeah, that was hilarious. George: Hey guys, what's going on? Jerry: Not much, just talking about that time we did that thing. George: Oh yeah, I remember that. Hey, remember that other time we did that other thing? Jerry: Yeah, that was pretty funny. Elaine: Hey, has anyone seen Kramer? George: No, I haven't seen him in a while. Jerry: Yeah, me neither. Hey, remember that time we saw him and he was doing that thing? Elaine: Oh yeah, that was so Kramer. George: Haha, yeah. Hey, remember that other time we saw him and he was doing that other thing? Jerry: Yeah, that was classic Kramer. Elaine: Yeah, I wonder what he's up to these days. George: Who knows, maybe he's still doing that thing he always does. Jerry: Yeah, probably. Hey, remember that time he did that thing and it was so Kramer? Elaine: Yeah, that was hilarious. George: Haha, yeah. Hey, remember that other time he did that other thing and it was so Kramer? Jerry: Yeah, that was classic. Elaine: Yeah, I miss Kramer. George: Me too. Jerry: Yeah, he was always good for a laugh. Hey, remember that time we did that thing and it was so funny? Elaine: Yeah, that was a good one. George: Haha, yeah. Hey, remember that other time we did that other thing and it was so funny? Jerry: Yeah, that was a classic. Elaine: Yeah, those were the good old days. George: Yeah, we should do something like that again sometime. Jerry: Yeah, maybe we should. Hey, remember that time we did that thing and it was so funny? Elaine: Yeah, that was a good one.
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Dec 13, 2022 06:24
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>Write song lyrics about snacks in the style of Nine Inch Nails. Verse 1: I thought I had it all A fridge full of snacks, I felt ten feet tall But now they're gone, and I'm left alone With nothing but this hunger in my bones Chorus: Snacks, why did you have to go Leave me here with this emptiness and woe I can't go on, I'm in such pain Snacks, you were my everything Verse 2: I tried to fill the void With other foods, but they're no joy They lack the taste, the crunch, the thrill They leave me feeling empty, cold, and ill Chorus: Snacks, why did you have to leave My heart is breaking, I can't believe I'm lost without you, can't you see Snacks, you were the only one for me Bridge: I thought our love was strong But now I see, I was wrong You're gone, and I'm left here to die Snacks, why did you have to say goodbye Outro: Snacks, oh snacks, come back to me I'll do anything, just set me free From this misery, this endless ache Snacks, without you, I can't take.
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Dec 13, 2022 06:32
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Write a script for an episode of Seinfeld in which the cast is being hunted by the alien from Predator. Each character must die a symbolic death, except for Kramer, who must defeat the Predator in single combat. The episode opens with Jerry, George, Elaine, and Kramer sitting around the coffee shop, discussing their plans for the day. Suddenly, they hear a strange noise outside and go to investigate. As they step outside, they see a spaceship hovering overhead. The spaceship opens up and the Predator emerges, armed with its deadly weapons. The Predator begins to hunt the four friends, one by one. Jerry is the first to go, as the Predator uses its cloaking technology to sneak up on him and impale him with its spear. Next, George is killed when the Predator traps him in a net and drags him into the air, leaving him hanging helplessly until he succumbs to his injuries. Elaine is killed when the Predator uses its shoulder-mounted plasma cannon to blast her into oblivion. As the Predator prepares to finish off Kramer, he manages to outsmart the alien and engage it in hand-to-hand combat. After a fierce battle, Kramer emerges victorious and the Predator is vanquished. In the end, Kramer stands victorious over the fallen alien, as the remaining survivors look on in amazement. "I told you I could take care of myself," Kramer boasts, as the episode ends.
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Dec 13, 2022 07:02
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I dunno guys, I actually miss the surreal David Lynch thing that Markov Chains make:
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Dec 13, 2022 07:15
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Jerry: grunting and struggling Elaine: Jerry, what are you doing? Jerry: I'm trying to suck my own dick. Elaine: Oh my god, Jerry. That's impossible. Jerry: I know, but I just wanted to see if I could do it. Elaine: Well, let me help you. grabbing Jerry's face and guiding it towards his own crotch Jerry: Thanks, Elaine. I appreciate it. Elaine: No problem, Jerry. Just remember, it's not as easy as it looks. Jerry: still struggling I think I'm getting the hang of it. Elaine: laughing Yeah, sure you are. Keep trying, Jerry. Jerry: giving up Okay, okay. I'll admit defeat. You win, Elaine. Elaine: smiling It's not about winning or losing, Jerry. It's about trying your best and having a good time. Jerry: rolling his eyes Yeah, yeah. I get it. Thanks for the help, Elaine. Elaine: No problem. Anytime, Jerry. patting him on the back The two of them laugh and continue with their day.
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Dec 13, 2022 07:16
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Jerry Seinfeld and Elaine are sitting in Monk's Cafe, discussing Elaine's latest dating situation. "So, you're dating a unionist, huh?" Jerry asks, taking a sip of his coffee. "Yeah, he's really passionate about Northern Ireland and the whole conflict there," Elaine replies. Just then, Kramer bursts into the cafe, looking excited. "Hey guys, you'll never guess who I just met!" he exclaims. "Who?" Elaine asks, looking curious. "Gerry Adams!" Kramer says, grinning from ear to ear. "He's the leader of the IRA!" Elaine's eyes widen in shock. "What? You met Gerry Adams? The IRA leader?" she asks, incredulous. "Yeah, and he invited me to join them!" Kramer says, still grinning. "Kramer, are you serious?" Jerry asks, looking concerned. "The IRA is a terrorist organization!" "Oh, come on Jerry, it's not that bad," Kramer says, waving his hand dismissively. "They're just fighting for their rights, you know?" At that moment, Elaine's unionist boyfriend walks into the cafe, looking angry. "What are you doing hanging out with Gerry Adams?" he demands, glaring at Kramer. "I was just invited to join the IRA," Kramer says, shrugging. "You can't be serious!" the unionist exclaims, turning to Jerry. "And you, Seinfeld, what do you think about this?" Jerry hesitates, not wanting to offend anyone. "Uh, I think it's a complex situation, and I'm not sure what the right answer is," he says diplomatically. The unionist scoffs. "Typical liberal, can't take a stand on anything," he mutters, before storming out of the cafe. Elaine looks at Jerry and Kramer, shaking her head. "Well, this is going to be interesting," she says, rolling her eyes.
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Dec 13, 2022 07:43
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| # ? May 3, 2024 00:38 |
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I hate this “failed to load” poo poo. It wrote something amazing that had me crying laughing, then it disappears. Anyways, I tried a bunch more times, and here’s what I got: >Write a short scene in script form of a Seinfeld episode where Jerry figures out his scrotum can fit over his entire body. He thinks he can use this to sneak into movie theaters, but things ultimately go very wrong for him when he attempts this. Involve all the main characters. INT. MONK'S CAFE - DAY Jerry, Elaine, George, and Kramer are sitting at their usual table. Jerry: (excited) Guys, you'll never guess what I discovered today. Elaine: What? Jerry: My scrotum is big enough to fit over my entire body. George: (disgusted) Gross, Jerry. Why would you even try that? Jerry: (serious) Because I figured out I can use it to sneak into movie theaters for free. Kramer: (impressed) Now that's a clever idea, Jerry. Elaine: (skeptical) I don't know, Jerry. That seems like a recipe for disaster. Jerry: (confident) Trust me, Elaine. It'll be a piece of cake. CUT TO: INT. MOVIE THEATER - DAY Jerry is slithering past the ticket booth, his scrotum stretched over his entire body. He tries to pass through the turnstile, but gets stuck. Jerry: (struggling) Ow! Ow! Ow! The theater staff and other patrons notice Jerry and start to gather around him. THEATER STAFF: (to Jerry) Sir, what are you doing? Jerry: (embarrassed) Uh... trying to get into the theater for free? The theater staff calls the police, who arrive and arrest Jerry for attempted theft. CUT TO: INT. PRISON CELL - DAY Jerry is sitting on a bench, his scrotum still stretched over his body. Elaine, George, and Kramer are standing outside the cell, looking at him. Elaine: (to Jerry) I told you this was a bad idea. George: (to Jerry) And you dragged me down with you. I was a willing accomplice to your scrotum-sneaking scheme. Kramer: (to Jerry) You know, Jerry, this could have been a great opportunity for me to make some money. I could have sold tickets to see the "Human Scrotum" at the theater. Jerry: (sighs) I guess I really screwed up this time. FADE TO BLACK
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Dec 13, 2022 08:15
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