Who Threadglightninged 2023: The Delay of Destiny

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > Cinema Discusso > Who Threadglightninged 2023: The Delay of Destiny

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

joylessdivision posted:

Because the French.

I finally watched The Black Hole last year and it is such a bizarre movie I don't know if I actually enjoyed it or if I was just too busy being confused/amazed that Disney made something like it.

I unabashedly love The Black Hole and am of the opinion that it is a way better movie than people give it credit for.

Does it stick the landing? Not quite. And it tries to ask some deep philosophical questions that it doesn't really give a good answer to. But it has heart, great model work and a beautiful soundtrack by John Barry.

# ¿ Mar 15, 2023 22:15

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# ¿ May 14, 2024 03:21

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

joylessdivision posted:

I absolutely agree with you about the score, the effects work, even the cast was interesting. I definitely need to watch it again because I went into it totally blind beyond "Weird Disney sci-fi movie that Anthony Perkins was in" and it's such a trip of a movie that I remember finishing it, and not really being able to figure out if I thought it was good or bad. It was interesting for sure and usually when I have that reaction to a movie I give it a second watch to get a better feel for it.

Maybe I'll do that this weekend. Double bill it with Tron, a movie I love more than I should.

For being a Disney film, much less their first PG film, The Black Hole is an extremely dark film. Someone getting disemboweled by a humanoid robot with blades? (Why does Maximillian have these in the first place?) Someone else getting blown up in a spaceship? Someone potentially getting lobotomized without anesthesia? A literal or metaphorical Hell? Maximillian Schell being trapped forever in Maximilliian's shell? :v:

The Cygnus as a cross between a haunted house and the Nautilus from 20000 Leagues Under the Sea, but in space, with Dr. Reinhart as an insane Captain Nemo?

I think the comparisons that people made when the movie came out (and still make) to Star Wars is unfair and also weak.

# ¿ Mar 16, 2023 02:51

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Chairman Capone posted:

It�s funny that between The Black Hole and Star Trek TMP, two of the main Star Wars �copycats� were closer to 2001. And the other was a James Bond movie.

I know someone at Paramount claimed the bigger influence on TMP going into production was actually Close Encounters, because it being a hit showed that Star Wars wasn�t just a flash in the pan. And Cubby Broccoli claimed that Moonraker had nothing to do with Star Wars, but was rushed to take advantage of the first space shuttle launch, which was originally scheduled for 1979.

Interestingly, the launch sequence of the shuttles in Moonraker are actually pretty accurate compared to other movies that try to depict the launch. (And don't use stock footage.)

And I'm honestly kinda skeptical of what Cubby said because it really felt like, for all of the Moore films, the director and producers were always chasing what was popular or in the zeitgeist at the time. (Live and Let Die with blaxploitation films, The Man with the Golden Gun and kung fu films and the real energy crisis (which really dates the film), A View to a Kill and the rise of Silicon Valley, for example.)

I've been toying with the idea of doing a big effort post/thread about The Black Hole for years, but always get intimidated by how well done some of the other OPs are. :cripes:

# ¿ Mar 16, 2023 17:16

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Phanatic posted:

The original idea for View to a Kill was just Goldfinger! It's the exact same plot, except with "gold" scratched out and "microchips" written in in crayon.

To be fair, we got a better deal with A View to a Kill in some respects. Christopher Walken is way more charismatic than Gert Fr�be as a Bond villain. Actually kind of foreshadowing the whole tech rear end in a top hat type that we're dealing with now. And at least May Day's about face isn't because of the power of rape.

On the other hand, Roger Moore was really showing his age by then. And I can't decide which title track is "better". Goldfinger is really when a lot of the now classic tropes of the franchise and James Bond character crystalized.

# ¿ Mar 16, 2023 18:06

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Chairman Capone posted:

And I for one would love to read a long effortpost about The Black Hole! I actually read the novelization first as a kid so then seeing the movie and the visuals/score was even more mind-blowing compared to what I was trying to picture in my head.

Thanks for the encouragement! Maybe that's what I need to actually start putting something together. I recently rewatched it in its full HD glory since for the longest time I either watched it on DVD or had memories from VHS and the amount of detail lost in the lower quality/resolution transfers really hurt the film.

# ¿ Mar 16, 2023 18:13

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

AceOfFlames posted:

Both the A View To A Kill and The Living Daylights themes own IMHO.

No love for License to Kill? Gladys Knight just belts out that song and I am 100% there for it.

# ¿ Mar 16, 2023 18:46

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Pope Corky the IX posted:

That was also the movie where Grace Jones decided she wasn't going to put up with the same poo poo Moore put the other Bond girls through and kept a giant dildo under the sheets during their sex scene to scare the poo poo out of him.

Wait... what did he do to the other Bond girls?

# ¿ Mar 16, 2023 19:41

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Black Lighter posted:

I rewatched Octopussy on a whim last night and almost every single action scene is ruined because they have to keep cutting between the stuntmen doing amazing, crazy stuff and Roger Moore on a set that only barely matches the environment. Also, speaking of Bond movies chasing trends, this one is so Indiana Jones that Temple of Doom's dinner scene might as well have been lifted wholesale from it. Also, somehow even more racist than Temple of Doom, and certainly a lot duller.

The only real high point in Octopussy is Vijay Amritraj and Kabir Bedi. But yeah, it is so racist and a very low point in what I consider a low stretch in the Bond series.

# ¿ Mar 16, 2023 20:28

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Cael posted:

I've been meaning to revisit it because it seems like one lost to history. Goldeneye straight up owns bones with no qualifiers needed, World is Not Enough and Die Another Day mix laughable bad and totally boring, but while I remember Tomorrow Never Dies being good I don't remember much else about it.

Besides Jonathan Pryce hamming it up and the finale being set on some kind of stealth boat(?)

I'm guessing that the stealth boat was supposed to be a scaled up version of the Sea Shadow.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2023 01:34

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Pope Corky the IX posted:

Mike Myers also made sure Penelope Spheeris didn�t come back for the second Wayne�s World because he didn�t think the first one was all that funny. He especially didn�t understand the humor behind the �Bohemian Rhapsody� scene.

So what you're telling me is that Mike Myers was actually the worst part of Wayne's World? I can believe that.

# ¿ Apr 2, 2023 14:23

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Cool Kids Club Soda posted:

Kicking the Yoshi out from under you

Didn't realize Mario is a Boomer

I mean, Mario punches Yoshi in the back of the head to get Yoshi to stick his tongue out in Super Mario World.

Mario is an rear end in a top hat.

# ¿ Apr 12, 2023 13:36

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

muscles like this! posted:

IIRC a good chunk of the book series got translated into English.

They're actually pretty good. And illustrated by Yoshitaka Amano.

# ¿ Apr 25, 2023 01:18

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

The Incal, in my mind, doesn't even work as a live action property. It really needs to be animated in Moebius's style. Also, it feels like way too much to put in just one film, but splitting it wouldn't be a sound decision because the first movie wouldn't be profitable enough, most likely, since not a lot of people have ever heard of it.

# ¿ May 3, 2023 01:46

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

https://twitter.com/AbbyHiggs/status/1673860285440901123

# ¿ Jun 28, 2023 10:21

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

There was already a good adaptation of Narnia up to the Silver Chair. :colbert:

# ¿ Jul 5, 2023 00:18

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Basebf555 posted:

The thing with Willis is that if you take away the Die Hard movies, his action movie stuff was always pretty sporadic. And aside from Die Hard, the majority of those action movies are mostly forgotten compared to his other work like The Sixth Sense, 12 Monkeys, Pulp Fiction, Unbreakable, etc.

Hudson Hawk always gets overlooked. :eng99:

# ¿ Oct 25, 2023 16:35

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

The Modern Leper posted:

I would also question Chan over Van Damme for a 80s-90s Hollywood Action Movie Mount Rushmore, as I can't think of a Hollywood movie he was in before Rush Hour.

Rumble in the Bronx?

# ¿ Oct 25, 2023 18:14

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Uncle Boogeyman posted:

that was his U.S. breakthrough, but not really a Hollywood movie.

I need to read The Last Action Heroes, I don't really have a sense as to how well known Jackie Chan was in the U.S. before Rumble. I know they tried to make him happen with that movie The Protector but it's by all accounts terrible. I think he was in Cannonball Run too? i assume film nerds knew about him in the '80s at least.

True. New Line just distributed Rumble, which was still a Hong Kong production.

# ¿ Oct 25, 2023 18:41

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

well why not posted:

He definitely gets head in MI1 and fucks in MI2 tho

When does that happen in MI1??

# ¿ Oct 27, 2023 04:20

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Chairman Capone posted:

Taika Waititi announced that his Star Wars movie is still go, but he has yet to finish the script for it (he's been working on this since at least January 2020) and he's going to finish his next four (!) movies before getting to Star Wars.

So yeah, it's definitely for sure still going to happen.

Also Next Goal Wins has been getting some pretty bad reviews so far.

While I feel pretty confident that his treatment of The Incal is going to suck, I really want to know how he's planning on condensing 5 books into two hours while being even close to semi-coherent.

# ¿ Nov 14, 2023 17:54

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Maigius posted:

My fear is that John Difool will be too competent and likable, besides the obvious coherency question.

There's that and also how do you translate Moebius's art to live action? The animated sizzle reel that was out there a while back is really how The Incal should be presented.

Like it makes more sense to make it a mini-series or a whole show than a movie.

90s/early 2000s Showtime or HBO would have been an awesome place for that or a Metabarons series.

# ¿ Nov 14, 2023 20:48

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

MonsieurChoc posted:

Played by Chris Pratt.

Surprisingly, I think John DiFool would be a good role for him, since John isn't meant to be a sympathetic character.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2023 15:00

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Chairman Capone posted:

He's made a few "Family Guy couldn't be made in today's WOKE climate" type of interviews recently.

I mean, he's right... but not for the reasons he's thinking of.

# ¿ Dec 1, 2023 03:35

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

anatomi posted:

Looking forward to Kojima's revolutionary scratch-n-sniff game.

But Earthbound already did this. :confused:

# ¿ Dec 8, 2023 23:02

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

The Saddest Rhino posted:

Yeah there are quite a lot of them, some of the best animation Disney has produced in recent years

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxSGM6_xIxQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zG9xYUDT6s

Yeah... They're all really fun. Feels like a lot of heart and love went into making them.

https://youtu.be/dlMReeBTNOI?feature=shared

https://youtu.be/c6gw5LnKeGU?feature=shared

Mickey's "wut happen?" in the second video always cracks me up.

# ¿ Dec 19, 2023 17:13

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Chairman Capone posted:

My mom watched Ferrari and her only comment about it was, "There wasn't a lot of driving in the movie. The main actor was named Adam Driver, he should have played a driver."

You need to give your mom an account.

# ¿ Dec 28, 2023 02:55

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

feedmyleg posted:

I'm mad at myself for looking forward to, like, 4 of those.

We should make a betting pool for their Rotten Tomatoes audience and critics scores.

You start a thread for this, I'll post in it.

# ¿ Jan 3, 2024 00:53

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Good news, everyone!

https://www.thenationalnews.com/arts-culture/2024/01/05/jerry-lewis/

The Day the Clown Cried is going to be screened sometime this year!

# ¿ Jan 7, 2024 21:41

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Pope Corky the IX posted:

In addition to all the other issues with Transformers, I just can't stand movies that refuse to stick with a consistent size for their giant monster or robot or whatever. I'm immediately thinking of Ghostbusters II where the 151' statue is submerged up to the crown in the East River which is only 40' deep, and then it's towering over buildings that are much taller than 151' feet. Why shrink it by two-thirds just double the size in the very next scene?

I am laughing at you getting riled up about this but not concerned with the fact the Statue of Liberty somehow became animate in the first place. (Or wondering what happened to the statue after Vigo gets destroyed.)

Maybe the positive psychoactive slime has the ability to change the size of an object too?

# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 16:35

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Enderzero posted:

I really hope there�s no Hawaiian stuff because that feels like a Burton obsession stemming from his love of the fifties and Americana type stuff and I really hate that era and styling. This is also why I was unsurprised to hear his next project is a remake of attack of the 50 foot woman - another b movie type thing. Great. Please make some more interesting stuff boomer.

When was the last time that Burton made an actually interesting movie, honestly?

# ¿ Feb 2, 2024 00:38

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Grendels Dad posted:

Probably not the one you meant but I love so much how these are at the start of the credits like it's a loving 80's comedy.

I mean... doesn't it kind of play out like a action movie satire in the beginning? Everyone's making dumb quips meant for laughs. The captors kind of die in goofy ways. You're set up for it to be like a Commando-esque movie, where the good guys just power through everything like they're invincible, grab the girl and save the day.

It only gets serious and turns the typical action movie tropes on their head once the squad starts getting killed off, one by one, by something that they're basically powerless to stop despite being presented as the elite.

I'm guessing the OP wanted this gif.

# ¿ Feb 3, 2024 01:12

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

8one6 posted:

J Jonah Jameson: Origins
It's a hard-hitting political thriller about an uncompromising New York reporter and the only comic book poo poo happens in the after credits scene with the Mole Man breaks through the street and the Fantastic Four show up.

I'm the "econmy".

# ¿ Feb 14, 2024 16:24

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Gonz posted:

I love Hot Rod.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOUrLn1FFCA

I need to make this my ringtone just to piss everyone off.

# ¿ Mar 3, 2024 04:25

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

FreudianSlippers posted:

One of the late night phone calls was Kubrick telling King that he thought ghost stories were inherently optimistic because the existence of ghosts meant consciousness continued after death.

I think it would be amazing and hilarious to get random fact or philosophical musings phone calls from Kubrick out of the blue.

# ¿ Mar 12, 2024 23:05

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

DeimosRising posted:

elem klimov eat your heart out

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought of Come and See.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2024 20:17

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

X-Ray Pecs posted:

Never
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oqwntLBY9tA

Found a much better quality version of the track: https://soundcloud.com/drafthousefilms/against-the-ninja

# ¿ Mar 28, 2024 20:19

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# ¿ May 14, 2024 03:21

DarkSol: May 18, 2006; Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.

Barry Convex posted:

https://twitter.com/Borys_Kit/status/1775987152574415295

As in, this Avengelyne

I hope that they don't film any of the actors' feet.

# ¿ Apr 7, 2024 16:13

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