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Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮
Tonight, from Toronto, Impact Wrestling presents Rebellion. While Impact’s Big Four PPVs are always good, there’s a bittersweet feeling as both Josh Alexander and Mickie James had to vacate their respective championships due to legit injuries. That sucks. What DOESN’T suck, though, are the matches to determine the new champions.

Impact World Championship
KUSHIDA vs. Steve Maclin

Talk about a letdown for Maclin. Since arriving in Impact two years ago, he’s been looking for respect and also a title. In February, he became number one contender to the World title, and wished Josh Alexander luck against KUSHIDA at Multiverse United because he wanted to beat the Walking Weapon in his hometown. Well, before Alexander could defend his title against KUSHIDA, he tore his triceps, ending the longest reign in the belt’s history on a sour note. As such, KUSHIDA’s title shot was moved here. Neither man has held a World Championship, so there’s more on the line than just the gold.

Impact World Tag Team Championship - Ultimate X48
Bullet Club’s ABC (c) vs. the Motor City Machine Guns

I shouldn’t have to sell you on Ace Austin, Chris Bey, Chris Sabin, and Alex Shelly doing an Ultimate X match.

Impact X Division Championship - elimination match
Trey Miguel (c) vs. “Speedball” Mike Bailey vs. Jonathan Gresham

Bailey and Gresham were GOING to have a #1 contender’s match, but noted coward Miguel caused a No Contest. Well, he can’t weasel his way out of title defense now, because I’m pretty sure the title could change hands in an elimination match!

Impact Knockouts World Championship
Jordynne Grace vs. Deonna Purrazzo

The other title vacated, Grace & Purrazzo have put on brilliant matches in the past, most notably the 30-minute Iron Woman match from 2020 that made people take notice of the two. Probably MOTN.

Last Rites match
PCO vs. Eddie Edwards

Ever since Edwards disbanded Honor No More, he and PCO have been at odds. No matter how many times Edwards thinks he’s gotten rid of PCO, the French-Canadian Frankenstein Monster comes back. Well, it’s time to end this the only reasonable way - with a casket!

Hardcore War
Team Bully (Bully Ray, Moose, Brian Myers, Kenny King, and Masha Slamovich) vs. Team Dreamer (Tommy Dreamer, Frankie Kazarian, Yuya Uemura, Bhupinder Gujjar, and Killer Kelly)

Six months after his return, I’m 99% sure this is Bully Ray’s sendoff from this run in Impact. I also firmly expect Masha Slamovich to give a Snow Plow to Bully Ray through a table afterwards.

Just a trios match
The Design vs. Joe Hendry, Dirty Dango, and Santino Marella

That’s right, the Director of Authority is coming out of retirement to team with fellow comedic wrestlers to take on the very serious Design, which will be represented by 3/4 of Deaner, Angels, Kon, and Callihan (we don’t know which members).

PRE-SHOW (these are also free on YouTube)

Impact Knockouts World Tag Team Championship
The Coven (c) vs. the Death Dollz

Witches wrestle spooky gals!

Also
Heath & Rhino vs. Champagne Singh & Shera

Heath’s got kids to feed, so any match is good enough for him.

8/7c, available wherever you get your PPVs that aren’t WWE nor TKP.

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Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮
ABC/MCMG was great, as expected.

gripebomb
Dec 13, 2006

I wanted to fight the world.

- Eddie Kingston
Just now sitting down and tuning in. Have I missed much or anything good?

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮
Jesus Christ, poor Tommy Dreamer :smith:

onefunkynote posted:

Just now sitting down and tuning in. Have I missed much or anything good?

Ultimate X48 was great, and the Design vs. Hendry/Dango/Marella was as it was expected with Callihan turning on the Design.

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮
:gonk: PCO's shoulder

e: :stare:

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮
:laffo: Bully Ray pulling a Powerhouse Hobbes

gripebomb
Dec 13, 2006

I wanted to fight the world.

- Eddie Kingston
Good refs!

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮
Hey, I remember Nick Aldis!

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Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮
Congrats, Steve Maclin. You're a star.

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