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well why not posted:J Neilson: Beautiful work, unfortunately we have to disqualify you. This base is flared, but only slightly. My hand catches it, but in an intense situation it’s not safe. I don’t feel comfortable handling this further. Jestery posted:"I guess I just gotta take this as a learning experience, I've only been making these things for a few years. But I've got the love, the capacious colon and the fire for it. I can walk out of here with my head up ,I will be back and I will be the champion" Non Compos Mentis posted:Look at the work he has put into the vein that runs along the shaft bee posted:"Your dildo, sir, it will keeeell"
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Apr 20, 2023 08:32
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Steve, you've made it through to the second round. For this round, we're gonna shake things up *Grady lifts a black sheet off the table next to him, revealing a barrel cactus*
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Apr 20, 2023 08:40
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Todd, you're our expert. Let's put this baby through some testing. *Cue montage of a stocky bald man with a goatee violating a pig carcass with a 20" double ended-dildo.
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Apr 20, 2023 08:47
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Now what sort of penetration should we expect to see in this demonstration? Or is this more of a slashing motion?
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Apr 20, 2023 08:52
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Somebody get me 20 ccs of rear end lubricant this was NOT built on rock and roll
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Apr 20, 2023 08:57
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I'm confident that against the right opponent we'll see the full 20" but I feel like the real beauty of the piece is its adaptability. You can make the initial penetration. *gets a running start and rams it halfway up the pig corpse's rear end But now watch this. *bends the rubber in half and rams the other end up it too.
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Apr 20, 2023 09:07
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*confessional* I had a bit of a failure during the moulding proces, I don't know if it was a bad batch of silicone, or the weather but nothing I did went right and I think that's why it's just not as rigid as I would have hoped
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Apr 20, 2023 09:41
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*slow motion shot of a very burly forearm smashing a hammer onto the tip of a rainbow horsecock, buttrock blares*
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Apr 20, 2023 10:05
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im going for the damasscass canister. im going to shove all 50 ball bearings up my rear end
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Apr 20, 2023 10:47
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judges: he forgot the white out, those are gonna get stuck in there. titanium dioxide is key
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Apr 20, 2023 10:47
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well why not posted:Wil Willis: For this challenge we’ll be building our dildos from recycled metal that you must source from [ dramatic cloth reveal ] this huge pile of handmade knives and historical weapons we found in the studio!
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Apr 20, 2023 11:19
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Cmon George, you knew this type of motorised unit is prohibited! Why did you build it? -I just had to, and if you have any integrity at all you'll still test it! *Break for commercials*
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Apr 20, 2023 11:42
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The sight of those men hammering away at the anvils, really going to town on their photorealistic dongers. Well, that awoke something in the viewers that they never knew they needed until now.
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Apr 20, 2023 12:41
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Terry, I understand that you were eager to try out your creation, but the step of quenching is essential. I wish you all the best in recovering and adapting to your stoma bag, but we will have to ask you to leave the forge.
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Apr 20, 2023 12:49
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The taunting never ceased. But he decided to take it in the end.
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Apr 20, 2023 12:54
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I get probation for my tastefully erotic Galaxy Quest fan fiction, but this FILTH goes unpunished???
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Apr 20, 2023 12:56
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"The buttplug part is fairly small & simple, sure, but I think the full cock & ball cage he incorporated into the base shows a real flair for intricate and yet practical work. Why, when I tried it out I could walk around the room with almost my normal gait." "Did Peter meet the brief or was his ambitious design a step too far for the judges? Find out after these commercials."
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Apr 20, 2023 13:07
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*gets out measuring tape and measures girth* "What were the specifications we gave the contestants?" "Unfortunately Ricky, the traditional Dutch HöllMastre must have a mid-shaft circumference of between 6.5"-7.5" - I'm measuring this as 6, 6 and a quarter. " "Contestants, as we always say, you MUST follow the requirements of the challenge. Ricky, you have failed to meet those requirements. It is for this reason, I need to ask you to leave the forge" Serak fucked around with this message at 13:19 on Apr 20, 2023 |
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Apr 20, 2023 13:17
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"what's he making there " "Those curves really have some kind of organic look to them, and what's going on over at the drill press?" *Confessional* "I just went with what I know, bad dragons is what I started with , I could make 'em in my sleep " *Cut back to forge* *High energy strings* "I think John copped one in the eye" "This is not good" *Wild gestures* Commercial
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Apr 20, 2023 13:18
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Yes yes, your 'tribute to the Goatman, bronze' certainly is impressive but it's far too large for entry into the competition. I BEG TO DIFFER  KIRK!
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Apr 20, 2023 13:35
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David Baker: That sort of time management, you really can’t beat it. The dildo he’s working on is more complicated than the others, but he’s planned every minute of the competition here. It’ll be hard to compete with that. A lot of good dongsmiths lack that level of planning and execution. Wil Willis: Yeah man for SURE haha.
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Apr 20, 2023 14:09
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You've shown us your skills in dongsmithing once again, but we expect nothing less in this Contest of Champions. For your final forge, we would like you to build... This. *Pulls back sheet to reveal a fleshlight* *Cut to contestants with face in their hands* *Hard cut to commercial*
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Apr 20, 2023 14:18
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I've never seen someone sign a topic title
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Apr 20, 2023 15:04
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*jiggly jello noises*
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Apr 20, 2023 15:07
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"You were tasked with forging us a classic 12" ramrod straight with low-hanging sack, and you've certainly done that. But our judges cannot understand why you then chose to then use it as the grip for a 15th century French pattern bastard sword. That is entirely out of spec and it is completely inappropriate to introduce dangerous weaponry into the project. Please leave the forge." *Confessional* "I accept that it was wrong, but I just couldn't help myself. I was too caught up in the moment and I apologise for any offense I may have caused."
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Apr 20, 2023 15:38
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There had to have been some actual cock handled historical swords but I don't feel like feeding google at the moment.
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Apr 20, 2023 16:00
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Bollock knives were a thing, they had little round guards at the base of the blade.
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Apr 20, 2023 16:19
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Hand forged dildo-chucks with electrified cores
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Apr 20, 2023 17:09
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By popular demand posted:There had to have been some actual cock handled historical swords but I don't feel like feeding google at the moment.  Not historical unless you count dune as future history but 
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Apr 20, 2023 17:12
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*Doug smashes a comically large rainbow hog through ~6 coconuts" *Buttrock plays* "Cletus , it felt good In the hand, the grooves you cut into the shaft allowed the fluid to drain out and not affect my grip. That really shows a high level of knowledge you have with your dong" "When Doug picked up my floppy hog, I saw him smile and I knew he was going to be happy with my shaft's handling"
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Apr 20, 2023 23:25
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Going for the water quench instead of the oil quench, hope he knows what he's doing!
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Apr 20, 2023 23:43
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Cum quench
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Apr 20, 2023 23:53
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Dave Baker, dressed exactly as he normally is: Welcome to ... Bondage Battle!
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Apr 21, 2023 00:20
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J. Neilson: Today we're bringing back a favorite that will really put your work to the test... (Camera pans behind J., revealing the test) J. Neilson: The Drilldo Joust
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Apr 21, 2023 00:27
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This week's challenge is very important to the rise of smut in the east, and so we have travelled here to take advantage of the hallowed walls of "The Hanazano room" 
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Apr 21, 2023 01:04
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He calls it forged, but for me that 'do is 90% cast. I appreciate the fine anatomical detail he added - those ball veins are some of the wriggliest you'll ever see - but it's just not what we're here for. Sergei's piece is much less imposing, but you can really feel the hardness that's only achieved by getting sweaty and really hammering it.
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Apr 21, 2023 01:18
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We've never asked for something like this before, but in front of us are three beautiful interpretations of a 34" horse inseminator. We certainly didn't expect to receive a strap-on option, but I think our expert is dying to try it out.
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Apr 21, 2023 01:32
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"looks like he wasn't able to centre the vaculock and that thing is just flopping all over the place"
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Apr 21, 2023 01:38
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You'll have three days in your home forges to reproduce this classic dildo from cinema history: the Rocking Chair from Burn After Reading. This iconic piece featured in the 2008 black comedy, Burn After Reading, where George Clooney's character assembles it, by hand in his basement. It features a smooth back-and-forth motion and a comfortable timber construction for the chair portion. We will be supplying the timber chair for you to repurpose, but the mechanism will be up to each individual dongsmith to design.
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Apr 21, 2023 01:52
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| # ? May 5, 2024 23:36 |
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This is what I'm talking about. A classic fullered 12" black rubber dildo. Timeless, elegant, and in this case - beautifully constructed. I couldn't agree more. I think the fuller is a great addition and not something you see on a lot of dildos anymore. For the folks at home: the fuller is the line going down the shaft for the cum to run down. I'm sorry but I have to correct you there. The fuller is just for weight reduction. Without it there'd be a full 5kg of rubber in this thing. How much does it weigh with the fuller? 4.82kg.
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Apr 21, 2023 04:25
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