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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GIDBkwi-nc Well when I was kid I'd take a trip Every summer, down to Mississippi’ To visit my granny in her antebellum world I'd run barefooted all day long Climbing trees free as a song One day I happened catch myself a squirrel Well I stuffed him down in an old shoebox Punched a couple holes in the top and when Sunday came I snuck him into church I was sittin' way back in the very last pew Showin' him to my good buddy Hugh When that squirrel got loose and went totally berserk! Well what happened next is hard to tell Some thought it was Heaven others thought it was Hell But the fact that something was among us was plain to see As the choir sang "I Surrender All" That squirrel ran up Harv Newlan's coveralls Harv leaped to his feet and said "Somethin's got a hold on me! Yeow!" The day the squirrel went berserk In the First Self-Righteous Church In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula (Pascagoula) It was a fight for survival That broke out in revival They were jumpin pews and shouting Hallelujah! (Hallelujah) Well, Harv hit the aisles dancin' and screamin' Some thought he had religion, others thought he had a demon And Harv thought he had a weed eater loose in his Fruit-Of-The-Looms He fell to his knees to plead and beg And the squirrel ran out of his britches leg Unobserved, to the other side of the room All the way down to the amen pew Where sat Sister Bertha better-than-you Who'd been watchin' all the commotion with sadistic glee But you should've seen the look in her eyes When that squirrel jumped her garters and crossed her thighs She jumped to her feet and said "Lord have mercy on me!” As the squirrel made laps inside her dress She began to cry and then to confess To sins that would make a sailor blush with shame She told of gossip and church dissension but the thing that got the most attention Was when she talked about her love life And then she started namin’ names! The day the squirrel went berserk In the First Self-Righteous Church In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula (Pascagoula) It was a fight for survival That broke out in revival They were jumpin' pews and shouting Hallelujah! (Hallelujah) Well seven deacons and then the pastor got saved And twenty-five thousands dollars was raised And fifty volunteered for missions in the Congo on the spot, hehe And even without an invitation There were at least five hundred rededications And we all got re-baptized whether we needed it or not Now you've heard the Bible stories I guess Of how He parted the waters for Moses to pass All the miracles God has brought to this ol' world But the one I'll remember to my dyin' day Is how he put that church back on the narrow way With a half-crazed Mississippi squirrel The day the squirrel went berserk In the First Self-Righteous Church In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula (Pascagoula) It was a fight for survival That broke out in revival They were jumpin pews and shouting Halelujah! (Halelujah) The day the squirrel went berserk In the First Self-Righteous Church In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula (Pascagoula) It was a fight for survival That broke out in revival They were jumpin' pews and shouting Hallelujah! (Hallelujah)
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May 19, 2023 01:12
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| # ? Apr 29, 2024 01:19 |
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T-thanks for this.
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May 19, 2023 01:15
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The "YouTube song link guy" gimmick is already taken op
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May 19, 2023 01:17
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satanic splash-back posted:The "YouTube song link guy" gimmick is already taken op
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May 19, 2023 01:27
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hey op pisssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
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May 19, 2023 01:33
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Yet another example of why it was a mistake to stop Sherman just when he was really getting started.
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May 19, 2023 01:35
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This really takes me back to some dark and terrible times.
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May 19, 2023 01:49
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Dick Fontaine posted:This really takes me back to some dark and terrible times.
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May 19, 2023 01:52
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Prescott posted:It can feel impossible to reconcile the lessons of such times with the person they helped us become. I don’t like it. Take it back!
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May 19, 2023 01:58
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gently caress you OP I can do this too https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGldNpngDws It was just after dark when the truck started down The hill that leads into Scranton Pennsylvania. Carrying thirty thousand pounds of bananas. Carrying thirty thousand pounds (hit it Big John) of bananas. He was a young driver, Just out on his second job. And he was carrying the next day's pasty fruits For everyone in that coal-scarred city Where children play without despair In backyard slag-piles and folks manage to eat each day About thirty thousand pounds of bananas. Yes, just about thirty thousand pounds (scream it again, John) . He passed a sign that he should have seen, Saying "shift to low gear, a fifty dollar fine my friend." He was thinking perhaps about the warm-breathed woman Who was waiting at the journey's end. He started down the two mile drop, The curving road that wound from the top of the hill. He was pushing on through the shortening miles that ran down to the depot. Just a few more miles to go, Then he'd go home and have her ease his long, cramped day away. And the smell of thirty thousand pounds of bananas. Yes the smell of thirty thousand pounds of bananas. He was picking speed as the city spread its twinkling lights below him. But he paid no heed as the shivering thoughts of the nights Delights went through him. His foot nudged the brakes to slow him down. But the pedal floored easy without a sound. He said "Christ!" It was funny how he had named the only man who could save him now. He was trapped inside a dead-end hellslide, Riding on his fear-hunched back Was every one of those yellow green I'm telling you thirty thousand pounds of bananas. Yes, there were thirty thousand pounds of bananas. He barely made the sweeping curve that led into the steepest grade. And he missed the thankful passing bus at ninety miles an hour. And he said "God, make it a dream!" As he rode his last ride down. And he said "God, make it a dream!" As he rode his last ride down. And he sideswiped nineteen neat parked cars, Clipped off thirteen telephone poles, Hit two houses, bruised eight trees, And Blue-Crossed seven people. It was then he lost his head, Not to mention an arm or two before he stopped. And he slid for four hundred yards Along the hill that leads into Scranton, Pennsylvania. All those thirty thousand pounds of bananas. Ending #1 Yes, we have no bananas, We have no bananas today (Spoken: And if that wasn't enough) Yes, we have no bananas, Bananas in Scranton, P A Ending #2: A woman walks into her room where her child lies sleeping, And when she sees his eyes are closed, She sits there, silently weeping, And though she lives in Scranton, Pennsylvania She never ever eats ... Bananas Not one of thirty thousand pounds ... of bananas Chosen/Actual Ending: You know the man who told me about it on the bus, As it went up the hill out of Scranton, Pennsylvania, He shrugged his shoulders, he shook his head, And he said (and this is exactly what he said) "Boy that sure must've been something. Just imagine thirty thousand pounds of bananas. Yes, there were thirty thousand pounds of mashed bananas. Of bananas. Just bananas. Thirty thousand pounds. Of Bananas. not no driver now. Just bananas!"
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May 19, 2023 02:08
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Gas ban you know the drill
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May 19, 2023 02:56
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what if instead of the op they went and got hosed for a terrible post? Not because of location, poo poo, this could be based in Maine and I wish it was, but because it's awful and I hate it. 
BigBeefCity fucked around with this message at 04:31 on May 19, 2023 |
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May 19, 2023 04:12
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Was the squirrel NEKKID?
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May 19, 2023 04:19
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Shinjobi posted:gently caress you OP I can do this too Wikipedia posted:Incident
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May 19, 2023 05:09
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ok boomer
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May 19, 2023 05:10
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how'd you like to be THAT guy
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May 19, 2023 05:57
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I met a squirrel yesterday. It made angry 'chhtk chhtk chhtk' sounds at me and did that vibrating thing with its tail.
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May 19, 2023 06:55
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That means you’ve made a lifelong enemy. For the life of a squirrel at least.
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May 19, 2023 07:17
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That's my favorite johnny cash song
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May 19, 2023 07:28
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deep dish peat moss posted:That's my favorite johnny cash song But you see, we can't plan on things without first talking to God Because we don't know his plans And if we don't include him, my friends, the way can get mighty hard They say that every time a good and righteous person is buried in God's good earth It's just fertilizer for the soil And I guess there must be some truth to that Whether we believe it or not I just wish that papa was here right now So that he could see this good crop, that we finally got!!!  We’ll see it one day, Harry
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May 19, 2023 07:50
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Prescott posted:I hope to find the same nobility in my final moments, and an absurd enough circumstance people remember them. drat that’s bananas!
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May 19, 2023 13:42
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i misread the title as "Mississippi Squirrel Reveal" and was all like hell yeah time to see a rad squirrel and now i'm disappointed in the actual thread
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May 19, 2023 14:07
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| # ? Apr 29, 2024 01:19 |
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The reason I won the war was simple, when they were expecting mustard gas, I hit them with the ketchup gas instead.
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May 19, 2023 20:15
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