Mississippi Squirrel Revival

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Prescott: May 16, 2023; I’m reading the Bible so I can teach the zombies about Heaven.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GIDBkwi-nc

Well when I was kid I'd take a trip
Every summer, down to Mississippi�
To visit my granny in her antebellum world

I'd run barefooted all day long
Climbing trees free as a song
One day I happened catch myself a squirrel

Well I stuffed him down in an old shoebox
Punched a couple holes in the top and when Sunday came
I snuck him into church

I was sittin' way back in the very last pew
Showin' him to my good buddy Hugh
When that squirrel got loose and went totally berserk!

Well what happened next is hard to tell
Some thought it was Heaven others thought it was Hell
But the fact that something was among us was plain to see

As the choir sang "I Surrender All"
That squirrel ran up Harv Newlan's coveralls
Harv leaped to his feet and said "Somethin's got a hold on me! Yeow!"

The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula (Pascagoula)
It was a fight for survival
That broke out in revival
They were jumpin pews and shouting Hallelujah! (Hallelujah)

Well, Harv hit the aisles dancin' and screamin'
Some thought he had religion, others thought he had a demon
And Harv thought he had a weed eater loose in his Fruit-Of-The-Looms

He fell to his knees to plead and beg
And the squirrel ran out of his britches leg
Unobserved, to the other side of the room

All the way down to the amen pew
Where sat Sister Bertha better-than-you
Who'd been watchin' all the commotion with sadistic glee

But you should've seen the look in her eyes
When that squirrel jumped her garters and crossed her thighs
She jumped to her feet and said "Lord have mercy on me!�

As the squirrel made laps inside her dress
She began to cry and then to confess
To sins that would make a sailor blush with shame

She told of gossip and church dissension but the thing that got the most attention
Was when she talked about her love life
And then she started namin� names!

The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula (Pascagoula)
It was a fight for survival
That broke out in revival
They were jumpin' pews and shouting Hallelujah! (Hallelujah)

Well seven deacons and then the pastor got saved
And twenty-five thousands dollars was raised
And fifty volunteered for missions in the Congo on the spot, hehe

And even without an invitation
There were at least five hundred rededications
And we all got re-baptized whether we needed it or not

Now you've heard the Bible stories I guess
Of how He parted the waters for Moses to pass
All the miracles God has brought to this ol' world

But the one I'll remember to my dyin' day
Is how he put that church back on the narrow way
With a half-crazed Mississippi squirrel

The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula (Pascagoula)
It was a fight for survival
That broke out in revival
They were jumpin pews and shouting Halelujah! (Halelujah)

The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula (Pascagoula)
It was a fight for survival
That broke out in revival
They were jumpin' pews and shouting Hallelujah! (Hallelujah)

# ¿ May 19, 2023 01:12

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# ¿ May 14, 2024 09:03

Prescott: May 16, 2023; I’m reading the Bible so I can teach the zombies about Heaven.

satanic splash-back posted:

The "YouTube song link guy" gimmick is already taken op

That guy lives of the world, not merely in the world

# ¿ May 19, 2023 01:27

Prescott: May 16, 2023; I’m reading the Bible so I can teach the zombies about Heaven.

Dick Fontaine posted:

This really takes me back to some dark and terrible times.

It can feel impossible to reconcile the lessons of such times with the person they helped us become.

# ¿ May 19, 2023 01:52

Prescott: May 16, 2023; I’m reading the Bible so I can teach the zombies about Heaven.

Shinjobi posted:

gently caress you OP I can do this too

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGldNpngDws

Wikipedia posted:

Incident

On March 18, 1965, a 33-year-old truck driver, Eugene P. Sesky, was on his way to deliver a load of bananas to Scranton, Pennsylvania.[1][4][5] Sesky, an employee of Fred Carpentier�operator of a small truck line in Scranton�was returning from the boat piers at Newark, New Jersey, where he had picked up his load. The load was destined for the A&P produce Warehouse in South Side.[1][6] Sesky was driving a 1950s Brockway diesel truck tractor with a 35 ft (11 m) semi-trailer and was headed down Rt. 307 when he lost control. That section of Rt. 307 contains a two-mile descent extending from Lake Scranton to the bottom of Moosic Street that includes a drop in elevation of more than 500 ft (150 m) in less than 1.5 mi (2.4 km). Sesky was unable to control the truck's speed down the hill due to a mechanical failure, variously attributed to the truck's brake system[1][4] or its clutch.[3] As a result, the truck cruised into Scranton at approximately 90 mph (140 km/h), sideswiping a number of cars before it crashed into a house[1] at the southwest corner of Moosic St and S. Irving Ave (41.4000�N 75.6550�W),[3] close to the bottom of the hill. Witnesses reported that Sesky did everything possible to avoid pedestrians and other motorists,[3] including climbing out onto the truck's running board to try to warn people,[1] and some have suggested that he may have deliberately flipped the truck over to avoid striking either bystanders or an automotive service station[7] on Moosic Street that could have exploded in flames, causing a greater loss of life. Sesky was thrown from the truck and killed[1] and bananas were spilled and strewn when the rig came to rest; 15 others were injured but only Sesky died. The road was closed for cleanup[4] as Johnson's Towing Company helped out in the recovery. Trucks under 21,000 lbs were required to go down the hill in first, low gear. Trucks over 21,000 lb (10.5 t) are no longer allowed to travel that route (they must use Interstate 380 via Dunmore).

I hope to find the same nobility in my final moments, and an absurd enough circumstance people remember them.

# ¿ May 19, 2023 05:09

Prescott: May 16, 2023; I’m reading the Bible so I can teach the zombies about Heaven.

deep dish peat moss posted:

That's my favorite johnny cash song

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eC40rVCedwM

But you see, we can't plan on things without first talking to God
Because we don't know his plans
And if we don't include him, my friends, the way can get mighty hard
They say that every time a good and righteous person is buried in God's good earth
It's just fertilizer for the soil
And I guess there must be some truth to that
Whether we believe it or not
I just wish that papa was here right now
So that he could see this good crop, that we finally got!!!

We�ll see it one day, Harry

# ¿ May 19, 2023 07:50

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