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read godwinks for a collection of holey moley coincidences
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May 24, 2023 03:01
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OP, I don't recall praying in a car crash. Last time I was in a serious crash, I just remember laughing. I was pretty sure that I was hosed (and just not feeling it yet) and was going to die. It struck me as so sudden and so absurd that it was funny. "Well. That's it. I'm gone, just like that. Haha." Turns out I was fine. There was just a lot broken glass, but all the blood was from minor cuts.
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May 24, 2023 03:10
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It’s true OP. You never know if you’re a coward until you’ve faced death. 
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May 24, 2023 03:24
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Nope Unfortunately I have no doubt that we are mammals like possums and rats, with lives just as important on this planet I could be wrong but I doubt it
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May 24, 2023 03:56
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elmer chud posted:Nope Even if you are wrong, it wouldn't automatically mean that one of the the modern iterations of the Hebrew god is the truth about reality.
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May 24, 2023 04:13
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I said gently caress a bunch of times, never asked for any imaginary beings to help me, not even Goku.
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May 24, 2023 04:28
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the only real ism is jism.
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May 24, 2023 04:34
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Ya wanna talk about fake new, bub? Your bible's the original fake news!
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May 24, 2023 04:37
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Prescott posted:I’ve known so many people who talked a big game about their lack of faith, but the minute their mom got cancer or they found themselves upside down in a car crash they found themselves praying. Can you really call yourself an atheist until you’ve looked Death in the eye and didn’t call out to the cosmos to save you? https://imgur.com/HKsSkeS Yeah I almost died one time
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May 24, 2023 04:50
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Now everyone debate Pascal's Wager!
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May 24, 2023 05:02
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syntaxfunction posted:Now everyone debate Pascal's Wager! Wouldn't bet on it
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May 24, 2023 05:03
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syntaxfunction posted:Now everyone debate Pascal's Wager! I'd rather not. It isn't a very good computer thing
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May 24, 2023 05:08
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No, the last time I almost died it was because the dude with the gun actually poo poo himself instead of shooting the elephant that had ripped the axel out of our open top Land Cruiser pushing us over a tree in southern Africa. I was really pissed at him though.
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May 24, 2023 05:27
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Three Olives posted:No, the last time I almost died it was because the dude with the gun actually poo poo himself instead of shooting the elephant that had ripped the axel out of our open top Land Cruiser pushing us over a tree in southern Africa. I'm pissed at him too!
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May 24, 2023 05:27
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Three Olives posted:No, the last time I almost died it was because the dude with the gun actually poo poo himself instead of shooting the elephant that had ripped the axel out of our open top Land Cruiser pushing us over a tree in southern Africa. what is the blowing a raspberry equivalent?
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May 24, 2023 05:31
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sure okay posted:Religion is just the result of pattern recognition going into overdrive OP. An evolutionary tool that got us out of the caves but causes us to see "meaning" (patterns) where there are likely none.
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May 24, 2023 07:41
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Prescott posted:Do you think it’s possible in trying to rationalize these phantom patterns and counter-check them against one another, we manage to catch certain irrational patterns beyond linear analysis that nonetheless hold true and provide predictive quality? That’s just the old gods, OP.
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May 24, 2023 08:32
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i once flipped a pickup truck into a field and almost died when it landed on its roof. i did not think of god or religion at all. i did say "holy poo poo" and "fuckin hell" a lot to my work colleague once we'd crawled out of the wreckage, does that count? edit: picture of my sweet wreck 
Panic! At The Tesco fucked around with this message at 10:26 on May 24, 2023 |
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May 24, 2023 10:24
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I don't play golf, so I identify primarily as a non-golfer, OP
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May 24, 2023 10:30
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Everybody are atheist about something OP
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May 24, 2023 13:38
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There are multiple gods, OP, I know because I am one, though I'm very junior in the Pantheon. It's like being a frat pledge  I'm still waiting to hear back from the Department of Deification about what exactly I'm going to be the god of. I put in a few areas of interest but the whole thing is decided by committee and there's a lot of red tape so who knows what my domain will end up being.
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May 24, 2023 13:44
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Considering how many gods humans havve worshipped over the milennia, everyone is a heathen. aside from solopsists, or rhythm methodists. or sado buddists...
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May 24, 2023 13:46
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Who answers when God calls? Kim. Thats who. 
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May 24, 2023 17:47
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I was raised Catholic. At around 16 years old Catholics do the Confirmation Sacrament; where they affirm their belief in god. I had to go to confirmation classes and even a week long retreat to a camp in the woods. Which was all cool because there were two really cute cheerleader girls in my class. /spoiler I got to kiss one! /spoiler The funny part though is that the focus was really strong on "do you truly believe in god; really think about it". So I did, sincerely. I'd started taking chemistry, biology, advanced math, physics courses, etc. The more I pondered the question of my belief in god, which is exactly what I was instructed to do, I started to realize that No, I don't believe in god. All their fault for telling me to introspect, lol. I was scared of my disbelief at the time, afraid of what people would say, so I went through the Confirmation ceremony. I had to kiss some gnarly old bishop's hand. Gross. A couple years went by and I learned my brother had also lost his faith/belief. It was actually a bonding experience for us. We both went to college and being jackass freshman students home for the summer we both slowly eroded our parent's faith. Mom is an atheist now. Dad might be still on the fence, but of the four of us no one has been to church in a good 25 years.
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May 24, 2023 19:03
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Chik-Fil-Atheist
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May 24, 2023 19:06
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Internetjack posted:I was raised Catholic. At around 16 years old Catholics do the Confirmation Sacrament; where they affirm their belief in god. I had to go to confirmation classes and even a week long retreat to a camp in the woods. Which was all cool because there were two really cute cheerleader girls in my class. /spoiler I got to kiss one! /spoiler Confirmation is like 12/13, no? I remember it coinciding with around 8th grade graduation and having a bunch of money all at once. Should have left it in loving Amazon.
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May 24, 2023 19:08
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kntfkr posted:Confirmation is like 12/13, no? I remember it coinciding with around 8th grade graduation and having a bunch of money all at once. Should have left it in loving Amazon. I'm sure it varies, but I was in my sophomore year at high school. I had to go to classes once a week at some "teacher" dude's house for a few months. It sucked. Pretty sure he was creeping on the girls. He was married, but in hindsight he really gave off a strong pedo vibe. Funny story... My parents were out of town for a week of vacation. I of course threw a party. The day after I take all the beer bottles and cans to the recycling center, and while standing in line with two full garbage bags the confirmation teacher guy walks into line right behind me. I'd skipped the previous night's class, because I had to party. It was slightly awkward to say the least.
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May 24, 2023 19:38
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That awkward moment when you confirm that you are a cool dude to the authorities
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May 24, 2023 20:00
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I don't know what this thread is about but I still wanted to post here
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May 24, 2023 20:13
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GABA ghoul posted:I don't know what this thread is about but I still wanted to post here hey man
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May 24, 2023 20:14
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Only when you cry out " I am euphoric" instead of "oh god" in the heat of coitus can you truly be counted an atheist.
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May 24, 2023 21:06
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somewhere in america there is a polyamorous redditor who had sex after playing settlers of catan and they say "oh my flying spaghetti monster" during coitus
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May 25, 2023 02:17
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Colonel Cancer posted:Only when you cry out " I am euphoric" instead of "oh god" in the heat of coitus can you truly be counted an atheist. Is "gently caress yeah" not atheist enough?
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May 25, 2023 02:21
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The test was your posting and yes I am convinced now more than ever there is no god
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May 25, 2023 02:32
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YeahTubaMike posted:Is "gently caress yeah" not atheist enough? only if you manage to include at least one major vestment of atheist clergy in your performance. Neckbeard, fedora, etc
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May 25, 2023 03:14
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every time i begin to wonder, i am reminded that if god were real there's no way he or she would allow gamepass to languish with nary a quality title to offer
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May 25, 2023 04:57
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Colonel Cancer posted:only if you manage to include at least one major vestment of atheist clergy in your performance. Neckbeard, fedora, etc Upvoted
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May 25, 2023 06:52
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I died once. It was ok
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May 25, 2023 07:43
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Still waiting for someone to rigorously disprove my faith that God is Tom Waits on a bender. Please do it, my family is drinking themselves to an early grave.
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May 25, 2023 09:21
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Well gently caress, I was an altar boy for 2 years and never got touched so I could thank god for that. But I think it was luck, the priest was so old I think his dick had shrivelled and died many years before. He was an amusing character, couldn't knock him really.
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May 25, 2023 10:17
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