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Can't smell for poo poo and therefore can't taste as well either. Cooking is/was one of my "things". I made my boss lay me off so I could finish the school year with my kid, and realized how much I was missing. Now I have the hardest time ever working for someone else, jump from job to job, expecting it to be different. A shop reached out on indeed because I messed with my resume. I actually told him I want out of the industry, that's why I cut out some places I did less than a year at. They pushed and pushed for an interview. Currently I make the most money I've made, have the most PTO anyone in this industry would think to offer, but at the same time, I really do think I am done with grinding and ruining things I love to do by monetizing them, thinking I'm supposed to do what I love. I hate capitalism, I'm no longer the social butterfly I once was, in fact I can't stand anyone for more than 5 mins. Had to seek out help for depression, now I'm dealing with being medicated for the first time in my life. It's good, because I did a fantastic job of thinking I was normal, and it's normal to be constantly in a state of fight or flight, or daydreaming of dying or other bad things happening isnt thoughts of suicide(I think it is?). Homesteading and gardening and building things around that is pretty much all I think about. Got really lucky and refinanced the house right before interest rates blew up, so it looks like I am going to stay buckled down, try to pay off the house and rent it(reasonably priced) and use that as a source of income to not have to work. Shame it's the only way pretty much for working people to accumulate any kind of wealth(ability to retire at a sensible age). In conclusion, I guess mostly positive, but I don't feel any better about life or the future.
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Aug 18, 2023 14:33
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| # ¿ May 10, 2024 14:48 |
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