|
I know he resurrected. But is he still chilling or did he die again? Because if he died again he seems kinda like a chump.
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 10:36
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 2, 2024 08:29 |
|
|
The only people that claim to have seen a risen Jesus are his closest friends that followed him around for like 15 years believing all his poo poo. They had to justify their lovely lives somehow. So they dug his rear end up and made up a story.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 10:43
|
|
|
He is risen and chilling in heaven now
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 10:48
|
|
|
He's the father, the son, and the holy ghost, of course he couldn't die again if he didn't want to
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 10:50
|
|
|
He tried to fight Goku and got sent to another dimension
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 10:52
|
|
|
zone posted:He's the father, the son, and the holy ghost, of course he couldn't die again if he didn't want to So he impregnated his own mother without her consent?
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 10:54
|
|
|
He lives forever like Bilbo in books
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 11:00
|
|
|
God posted:After the Lord Jesus had spoken to them, he was taken up into heaven and he sat at the right hand of God. Then the disciples went out and preached everywhere, and the Lord worked with them and confirmed his word by the signs that accompanied it.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 11:09
|
|
|
"You know you might be a disciple if.... HERE'S YOUR SIGN"
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 11:35
|
|
|
Jesus lives at Burger King now
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 12:00
|
|
|
Jesus 3 days later:
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 12:23
|
|
|
He does every time you masturbate
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 12:54
|
|
|
the french call it "the little death".
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 13:26
|
|
|
He Lives!
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 13:28
|
|
|
The Bible says he flew up into Heaven eventually (and then went to America for a little bit), but that's a lie. The Ressurection didn't happen- he went to Japan instead to live as a farmer:Wiki posted:Shingō village is the location of what is purported to be the resting place of Jesus, the "Tomb of Christ" (Kirisuto no haka), and the residence of Jesus' last descendants, the family of Sajiro Sawaguchi.[5] According to these claims, Jesus Christ did not die on the cross at Golgotha. Instead, a man alleged to be his brother, Isukiri,[6] took his place on the cross, while Jesus escaped across Siberia to Mutsu Province, in northern Japan. Once in Japan, Jesus changed his name to Torai Tora Daitenku and became a garlic farmer. In Japan, Jesus allegedly married a woman named Miyuko, with whom he fathered three children, all daughters. The eldest daughter married into the Sawaguchi family, which is claimed to hold a direct lineage to Jesus, evidenced by certain non-Japanese physical characteristics. After his death at an age exceeding 100, Jesus was said to have been interred into one of two grave mounds in the village. A remnant of the crucified Isukiri, was Isukiri's ear and he was also believed to have had a lock of hair that belonged to his mother, is allegedly buried in the other mound. He could have went to India instead, though: Wiki posted:The treatise suggests that Jesus, having survived crucifixion, discreetly left Roman jurisdiction for the East, starting his journey from Jerusalem and passing through Nisibis and Persia, eventually reaching Afghanistan where he met the Israelite tribes who had settled there after their escape from the bonds of Nebuchadnezzar centuries before. From here he travelled to Kashmir where some Israelite tribes had also settled and lived there until his death at an old age.[4]
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 13:30
|
|
|
Jeus poped off the nails an flew into the sky manually never seen again.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 13:31
|
|
|
Quotey posted:The Bible says he flew up into Heaven eventually (and then went to America for a little bit), but that's a lie. The Ressurection didn't happen- he went to Japan instead to live as a farmer: He backpacked around India with his buddy Biff.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 13:31
|
|
|
redshirt posted:He backpacked around India with his buddy Biff. Biff is my favorite book in the Bible.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 13:35
|
|
|
They call the orgasm Petit Mort, and Jesus and his teachings have gently caress so many people He's either dead or the greatest energy vampire living in the core of the earth.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 13:39
|
|
|
if Jesus ever did come back, they probably burnt him at the stake for heresy.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 13:41
|
|
|
Yeah, he'd be like don't hang this man because hes black and a slave, and he gets lynched as well My son, please, get off that mans neck STAND BACK AND STAND DOWN My Son, please, BOOM
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 13:43
|
|
|
Treecko posted:He is risen and chilling in heaven now He is jizzin
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 13:44
|
|
|
Was Jesus a zombie?
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 14:10
|
|
|
Quotey posted:The Bible says he flew up into Heaven eventually (and then went to America for a little bit), but that's a lie. The Ressurection didn't happen- he went to Japan instead to live as a farmer: i would love if that was real. like jesus did all the magic poo poo and then retired to some viliage in japan like loving wolverine. redshirt posted:Was Jesus a zombie? more of a well meaning litch or revanant
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 14:26
|
|
|
redshirt posted:He backpacked around India with his buddy Biff. No no no, Jesus went to India with Biff, learned karate, THEN went back and got crucified.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 14:36
|
|
|
He didn't die the first time. He was a really good actor.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 14:46
|
|
|
jesus is my lord and svaior. he lives in my heart
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 14:51
|
|
|
please accept jesus christ the LORD into ur heart.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 14:52
|
|
|
Jesus came back as a black man in 1950s Alabama
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 14:53
|
|
|
Which one?
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 14:54
|
|
|
luv2shit posted:please accept jesus christ the LORD into ur heart. How much will you pay me to do so?
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 14:54
|
|
|
redshirt posted:How much will you pay me to do so? what is ur soul worth to u
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 14:59
|
|
|
I'm not using mine. Can I donate it to a worthy charity or something?
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 15:00
|
|
|
goatface posted:I'm not using mine. Can I donate it to a worthy charity or something? that is very kind. thank uyou
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 15:05
|
|
|
Ignore that bullshit, Jesus is a life in Christ. I know someone in HR where John works, you know John, were looking for a new employee. Its not good money but its Christs work in action.
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 15:06
|
|
|
Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:He is jizzin The Father, the Son, and the Holy Ropes
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 15:07
|
|
|
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZIikDqnkOE
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 15:07
|
|
|
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-rhMGxDa6c Insane aewsome band of the genre, I dont care for them. Wee fucked around with this message at 15:13 on Jul 17, 2023 |
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 15:10
|
|
|
luv2shit posted:what is ur soul worth to u 2 dollars
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 15:10
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 2, 2024 08:29 |
|
|
every time you fart you lose a part of your soul so stop farting
|
|
#
?
Jul 17, 2023 15:16
|
|
