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well predictably enough my [chud] sister is once again trying to convince me to travel (lol, lmao) out to dad's funeral. Her reasoning basically read like the pre-amble to a Biden administration executive order making coal-rolling mandatory for all pick up trucks, if they let Kamala write it. Among the "points" she thinks she made: - Manipulatively claimed the funeral could help the family reach closure. I respectfully reminded her that our 'parents' never sought my consent before bringing me into this hosed up toilet world, and that the acceptance that our ecosystem is 5-10 years from mass death and total collapse is all the closure I need. Go figure this only made her more hysterical. -Tried to gotcha me by claiming her kids haven't seen me in four years and don't remember that they have an uncle. I calmly noted that I have always found her child-bearing immoral but have tried to hold my tongue about her ghoulish transformation into a full-blown eugenicist genocidaire. - Claimed to be "really seriously concerned" about the climate yet demanded to know "how long I'm going to live like this." I was eventually able to recover my composure enough to remind her that the cruelty is the point, before settling into the disturbing realization that this is what an un-crack ping'd brain looks like - As a final chef's kiss she concluded by trying to claim that she "loves me" and "is just really concerned and wants the best for me." At this point I just loving let her have it. I told her in no uncertain terms that this is straight out of the first page in the emotional abuse playbook and that unfortunately for her I know all those plays like the back of my hand. I told her her behavior has shown that treats and mass death are all she actually loves, and she'll hoover up and brainlessly repeat anything and everything that the Biden administration puts out to launder their campaign of social murder. Sorry for the length of this post, this interaction genuinely made me feel like I'm the crazy one for a split second there, and I'm very thankful to have a community of folks who actually have their eyes open
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:10 |
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# ? May 9, 2024 11:36 |
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hmm
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:11 |
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i was takin a poo poo at work and some chud went into the stall next to mine and took a louder, messier poo poo poo poo-mogged by the chuds smdh
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:15 |
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Smug Mug posted:hmm
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:17 |
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i'm really sorry that happened to you. shitlibs can't process these difficult emotions like us so they just go and vote for a freaking rapist instead.
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:26 |
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your sister has gone full mask off with open biden, and all you can do is lol and lmao.
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:28 |
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got told by a family member that apartheid was just black people whining
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:30 |
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Smug Mug posted:hmm
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:31 |
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Print out the wikipedia entry for Jeffrey Epstein and slide it under her door. If that doesn't work I dunno what else you can do but
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:35 |
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my coworker just returned from maternity leave and really showed her whole rear end by reporting me to hr just because I happened to loudly comment that having children is less moral than drunk driving
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:43 |
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cannot beleive this poo poo is still happening in tyool 2023. hellworld is truly upon us.
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:46 |
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paranoid randroid posted:my coworker just returned from maternity leave and really showed her whole rear end by reporting me to hr just because I happened to loudly comment that having children is less moral than drunk driving I'm so sorry that happened to you. brain worms are real
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:47 |
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my niece's school held a bake sale and rather than explain the concept of emotional labour to her AGAIN I just decided to give in and go i already knew things weren't going to go well given all the looks i got while wearing my N99 Safety Promask Halo Butyl Full Face Respirator, there's still a pandemic on you know and it spreads just as easily outside in a football field! kids getting scared and crying? GOOD they should be scared! things turned really sour when i realised that the bakesale was raising funds for ukraine, probably funding stinger missiles for nazis to shoot into the apartments of russian widows. I tried to explain the Minsk agreement to these kids but i had left my 3M HF-800SD speaking diaphragm at home so nobody could understand a word I said and my mask was fogging up so i couldnt really see who i was talking to anyway. i'd already had a couple of whiskies by this point via my internal drinking straw so I was getting pretty animated and started drawing an explanatory diagram about SWIFT sanctions and their relation to the Black Sea Grain Deal in chalk on the football clubhouse wall. All these little particle-spewing banderistas went nuts and I got escorted out before I could even display my mixed bean brownies. i have learnt my lesson and methinks i shant be doing that again. i'm glad all these kids will be dead in 10 years anyway
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:49 |
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Something that actually happened: I was serving coffees and hot chocolates. I was writing a C on the coffee lids and HC on the hot chocolate lids. I must've placed a coffee cup or two sideways because a dipshit boomer dressed like a typical member of the professional managerial class customer asks, "What does the U stand for?" I joked, "Union-made!" And he mutters in reply, "Oh, so we're dividing people now..." A union is literally the opposite of division, dumb gently caress Australian Word.
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 19:51 |
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 20:00 |
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My dad was so sad he hasn't seen me in 3 years and just wanted to hug me and see my face. I told him he can back off if he wants to open Biden himself and get airborne AIDS and to maintain 6 feet of distance from me at the family gathering.* *Based on a true goon story.
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 20:06 |
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Poppers posted:My dad was so sad he hasn't seen me in 3 years and just wanted to hug me and see my face. I told him he can back off if he wants to open Biden himself and get airborne AIDS and to maintain 6 feet of distance from me at the family gathering.* playtime's over dad
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 20:10 |
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*pulls up thesaurus types in "the help"* So I was talking to someone I provide mutual aide to...
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 20:14 |
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my mom started telling me she’s hoping to “travel the world” once she’s retired. after a hearty round of loling and lmaoing I calmly explained to her that ongoing mass death and agricultural failures make it highly unlikely there will still be a world for her to travel by the time she retires- even setting aside some of the obvious ethical issues with international travel. I even sent her some articles and more realistic RCP baseline studies to help her out but she just told me I was being a “buzzkill” and making her sad nothing like a little crack ping to unmask peoples inner lib
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 20:15 |
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i'm gay and one time i told my coworker that and she looked at me like i was dumb
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 20:17 |
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redneck nazgul posted:i'm gay and one time i told my coworker that and she looked at me like i was dumb lol
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 20:27 |
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 20:28 |
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but for real though i did once start talking about how climate change would gently caress all of us especially the next generation in front of my cousin who had recently announced his wife was pregnant and my whole family simultaneously told me to shut the gently caress up lol
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 20:53 |
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Communist Thoughts posted:but for real though i did once start talking about how climate change would gently caress all of us especially the next generation in front of my cousin who had recently announced his wife was pregnant and my whole family simultaneously told me to shut the gently caress up lol they were right to do so
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:01 |
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i was waiting for a bus a bus stop and read the wrong time table and thought my bus would come at any moment and when the (wrong) bus came i only noticed it was the wrong one after it had started decelerating to pick me up so i panicked and got on it then took the opportunity to step off at the next stop that was ~150m away as two other people were getting off there i tried to show that i was intending to take another bus by going up to and looking at the time table but they still looked at me weird
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:07 |
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Communist Thoughts posted:but for real though i did once start talking about how climate change would gently caress all of us especially the next generation in front of my cousin who had recently announced his wife was pregnant and my whole family simultaneously told me to shut the gently caress up lol trap sprung
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:08 |
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Communist Thoughts posted:but for real though i did once start talking about how climate change would gently caress all of us especially the next generation in front of my cousin who had recently announced his wife was pregnant and my whole family simultaneously told me to shut the gently caress up lol some communist thoughts should be kept to yrself OP
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:08 |
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lobster shirt posted:they were right to do so yep
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:15 |
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bump
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:16 |
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it's not as if your Nostradamic predictions could help, your nephew will starve regardless
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:18 |
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this isnt even close to as sad as the real stories it's satirizing
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:21 |
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Cuttlefush posted:this isnt even close to as sad as the real stories it's satirizing whats the real one
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:29 |
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I'm QUEER FRASIER's sister. It's not satire.
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:30 |
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today at the grocery store i was walking past someone and they moved a bit to make more space for me but i didnt want to bother them so i went into a side aisle they were standing next to and stood there pretending to look at stuff until they left
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:34 |
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lobster shirt posted:whats the real one you know where they are
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:35 |
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Cuttlefush posted:you know where they are oh i know where it is i just want to see the specific one its based on lol (if such a thing exists...)
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:49 |
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when im crossing a road and theres trafic i prefer to stand a bit away from the crosswalk and wait until theres a gap to avoid the interaction with the drivers
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 21:53 |
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Megamissen posted:today at the grocery store i was walking past someone and they moved a bit to make more space for me but i didnt want to bother them so i went into a side aisle they were standing next to and stood there pretending to look at stuff until they left goons rock
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 22:00 |
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I had been getting by on weed for a while by sneaking into my brother in law's house and stealing handfuls at a time eventually resulting in him noticing, which meant nothing to me because it was a perfect crime, but his solution to the perceived lack of security was to MARRY and move this horrific trash woman co worker and her two nightmare hyper hosed up kids into his parents house (without even asking them which was hilarious). They pretty much poo poo all over everything and smeared chocolate and poo poo into everything, just annihilated the house over the course of three weeks, almost put his mother in the hospital from the stress.
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 22:00 |
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# ? May 9, 2024 11:36 |
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my neighbor's ex-dog frightened me
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# ? Jul 27, 2023 22:01 |