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Harry_Potato posted:I'd buy Twitter. It's value should be down to a billion or so by now and take my turn flying it into the ground. I'd rename it "W"
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Aug 5, 2023 17:32
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| # ? May 2, 2024 17:06 |
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I know it's a stand up joke from some comedian I can't remember but the best "If I Won The Lottery" idea was buying expensive cakes for lovely people on their birthday, and give them no actual material gift. "Hey Happy Birthday! I got you a $1,000,000 cake!"
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Aug 5, 2023 17:36
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Extra row of tits posted:I always joke “$10 million dollars in lotto! I could have nine people killed!” Looks like we're moving into the 'What wouldn't you do for $9m?' questions.
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Aug 5, 2023 18:30
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Windows 98 posted:I know it's a stand up joke from some comedian I can't remember but the best "If I Won The Lottery" idea was buying expensive cakes for lovely people on their birthday, and give them no actual material gift. "Hey Happy Birthday! I got you a $1,000,000 cake!" Happy birthday, here's a $1,000,000 birthday cake and a trip to the Titanic.
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Aug 5, 2023 18:32
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redshirt posted:I'd rename it "W" "Harry Potato's Semiracist Funhouse"
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Aug 5, 2023 19:23
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Outrail posted:Happy birthday, here's a $1,000,000 birthday cake and a trip to the Titanic. It’s not that millionaires “sub” is it?
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Aug 5, 2023 20:02
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Outrail posted:Happy birthday, here's a $1,000,000 birthday cake and a trip to the Titanic. Man, you don't even think you could build another titanic for that much? What a poo poo up.
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Aug 5, 2023 21:02
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Extra row of tits posted:It’s not that millionaires “sub” is it? Of course not, this is the Titin, totally different. Very safe. Ignore the duct tape.
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Aug 5, 2023 21:10
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Sounds legit. I’m in!
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Aug 6, 2023 05:49
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Hire some people, start making games. Also sponsor creative people making stuff. Like I'd go find people making games -- good ideas, they've laid some groundwork -- then talk to them, find them people to fill in where they're lacking (artists, musicians, programmers, whatever) and pay them a fair wage to work with the person's small project. Then make connections with streamers -- not big ones, maybe a bunch of smaller ones -- to stream said completed game. That way a bunch of people land gigs, a tiny game gets made bigger and better than it would have otherwise, and streamers get some extra revenue promoting it. Everyone benefits. I have no idea how many times or how long I'd be able to do it.
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Aug 6, 2023 07:35
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I’d do that Mitt Romney rich guy thing and take over companies, saddle them with a bunch of debt and make them go bankrupt, but only companies that own rental properties.
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Aug 6, 2023 08:41
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Smik posted:Hire some people, start making games. Also sponsor creative people making stuff. Sounds lame as hell tbh Just do a bunch of heroin like a cool person
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Aug 6, 2023 08:45
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Smugworth posted:I can log out whenever I want to Pretty sure your log out button still has the shrink wrap plastic still on it, so be honest, it's never been touched.... ....but I guess you still "could" log out at anytime, you just haven't, and unfortunately probably won't....
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Aug 6, 2023 14:57
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I'm winning the lottery as we speak.
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Aug 6, 2023 16:30
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I want to use my wealth to buy two blimps and crash them into each other to see what kind of sound they made.
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Aug 6, 2023 16:42
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I will go all Ross Perot and try to buy the presidency. I just want the Diet Coke button bur I'll take the rest I guess.
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Aug 6, 2023 16:47
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i would pay people to cook and clean and stop working and just do fun stuff everyday, the ultimate fantasy, a manchild with no shame
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Aug 6, 2023 18:03
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real talk tho if you win the lottery you should tell absolutely no one. The only words to come out of your mouth should be to an army of lawyers and financial advisors. Once your estate is in order and you have sufficient legal counsel you can start making decisions on the money and telling select family members. Most people who win the lottery end up having every acquaintance you've ever met start badgering you or suing you. Your old boss, your lovely cousin, the friends with kids who have medical bills. They all come out of the woodworks. And you should have some generosity to the people in your life, but that generosity needs guidelines and legal backing.
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Aug 6, 2023 18:11
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Overdog posted:What a poo poo up
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Aug 6, 2023 18:44
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Windows 98 posted:real talk tho if you win the lottery you should tell absolutely no one. The only words to come out of your mouth should be to an army of lawyers and financial advisors. Once your estate is in order and you have sufficient legal counsel you can start making decisions on the money and telling select family members. Most people who win the lottery end up having every acquaintance you've ever met start badgering you or suing you. Your old boss, your lovely cousin, the friends with kids who have medical bills. They all come out of the woodworks. And you should have some generosity to the people in your life, but that generosity needs guidelines and legal backing.
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Aug 6, 2023 19:12
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I've won the lottery of life
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Aug 6, 2023 19:52
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Windows 98 posted:real talk tho if you win the lottery you should tell absolutely no one. The only words to come out of your mouth should be to an army of lawyers and financial advisors. Once your estate is in order and you have sufficient legal counsel you can start making decisions on the money and telling select family members. Most people who win the lottery end up having every acquaintance you've ever met start badgering you or suing you. Your old boss, your lovely cousin, the friends with kids who have medical bills. They all come out of the woodworks. And you should have some generosity to the people in your life, but that generosity needs guidelines and legal backing. Extra row of tits posted:I always joke “$10 million dollars in lotto! I could have nine people killed!”
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Aug 6, 2023 19:53
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Windows 98 posted:real talk tho if you win the lottery you should tell absolutely no one. The only words to come out of your mouth should be to an army of lawyers and financial advisors. Once your estate is in order and you have sufficient legal counsel you can start making decisions on the money and telling select family members. Most people who win the lottery end up having every acquaintance you've ever met start badgering you or suing you. Your old boss, your lovely cousin, the friends with kids who have medical bills. They all come out of the woodworks. And you should have some generosity to the people in your life, but that generosity needs guidelines and legal backing. f u i'm telling my mum 
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Aug 6, 2023 19:53
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im withdrawing it all in cash and livestreaming myself setting it on fire
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Aug 7, 2023 00:47
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I'm taking the whole $300 million and putting it into NFTs.
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Aug 7, 2023 00:49
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Panic! At The Tesco posted:f u i'm telling my mum I was thinking,”I guess I’ll just have to lie to my mom about what I do for a living and set up, like, monthly payments to her?” Then I remembered that I recently let slip that someone she worked with was getting a divorce and, while I was pretty sure it was common knowledge, I wasn’t completely certain. So I asked her not to mention it at work, just pretend I didn’t mention that. She said she would. A month later she texted me to notify my that my friend was getting a divorce. Like she thought this would be news to me. What I’m saying is, if I tell her to pretend I didn’t win the lottery, she may actually forget I did*. She says her doctors say there’s no sign of dementia. I think they are incorrect. *I am not going to win the lottery because I don’t buy lottery tickets.
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Aug 7, 2023 01:32
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I was watching about a video about someone who hadn't redeemed a ticket yet and apparently the lottery commission of the state and the news were showing the store security camera footage of the ticket being bought to try to identify the buyer before time ran out. Are you f'n kiddin' me!? Imagine if you did everything right with your $1.8B ticket to keep people from finding out and the manager of the local Gas-n-Go decided to post your face on Youtube or Tiktok from the security camera. Like every community has the 'that guy' that would be instantly found out by someone. He'd be a dead man before they could get it redeemed.
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Aug 7, 2023 02:00
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when i win the lottery i'll spend the proceeds on new threads for somethingawful
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Aug 7, 2023 02:34
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JediTalentAgent posted:I was watching about a video about someone who hadn't redeemed a ticket yet and apparently the lottery commission of the state and the news were showing the store security camera footage of the ticket being bought to try to identify the buyer before time ran out. What No lol. Lottery winners tell virtually no one and immediately vanish and go stay with friends and family quietly while they're getting their affairs in order. As for the ticket, even if someone tried to kill you or something, there'd be no way to be sure you had it on you or something just walking around. Plus, many states require lottery winners over a certain $ amount to publicly declare themselves, and aren't allowed to claim it under a trust fund or something.
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Aug 7, 2023 02:43
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Toxic Mental posted:What Except for your Mum.
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Aug 7, 2023 02:44
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Toxic Mental posted:Even if someone tried to kill you or something That's that good paranoia
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Aug 7, 2023 02:48
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redshirt posted:Except for your Mum. She cannot be hidden nor vanish
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Aug 7, 2023 02:54
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I would buy one of those foldable bendy screen phones, you know the ones, and import no contacts from my old phone, because why would I want to talk to those losers any more. Then I'd get the most expensive mobile network with the max GBs. And then I'd buy the best video card that had like 4 huge fans on it.
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Aug 7, 2023 02:54
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buy all the girls on my block silver plated six shooters and a quart of the finest highland scotch
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Aug 7, 2023 03:29
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covidstomper58 posted:I would buy one of those foldable bendy screen phones, you know the ones, and import no contacts from my old phone, because why would I want to talk to those losers any more. You need a Nvidia a100 or 2. Fans are for the weak.
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Aug 7, 2023 03:30
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I’d build the biggest dick sucking factory this world has ever seen
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Aug 7, 2023 04:17
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JediTalentAgent posted:I was watching about a video about someone who hadn't redeemed a ticket yet and apparently the lottery commission of the state and the news were showing the store security camera footage of the ticket being bought to try to identify the buyer before time ran out. There was a dude who mailed in his winning ticket which was about to expire (after a year). He used bog normal postage and included a letter saying he was pretty sure he had won but hadn’t got around to checking the numbers.
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Aug 7, 2023 04:49
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Pinche Rudo posted:I’d build the biggest dick sucking factory this world has ever seen Proving the fact that all billionaires suck. Imagine putting your own mother out of business like that?
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Aug 7, 2023 05:25
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Wifi Toilet posted:Proving the fact that all billionaires suck. Imagine putting your own mother out of business like that?  I could have sworn we had a “NOICE!” Smiley, but I couldn’t find it.
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Aug 7, 2023 06:57
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Get two ribs removed
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Aug 7, 2023 14:36
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