- canyoneer
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I only have canyoneyes for you
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booked some time at a SMASHBURGER lab for an experiment to test for an as-yet undiscovered non-beef burger even smaller than the slider, the Higgs-Bison
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Aug 20, 2023 00:26
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 6, 2024 03:46
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- canyoneer
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I only have canyoneyes for you
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Aug 20, 2023 00:27
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- canyoneer
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I only have canyoneyes for you
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heard all the exaggerated jokes from burger engineers about how my discipline isn't "real world applicable"
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Aug 20, 2023 00:27
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- Viginti Septem
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Oculus Noctuae
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Observe our new Double-Slider Experiment.
https://i.imgur.com/9jTkSUL.mp4
Thanks to vanisher for the paradise sig!
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Aug 20, 2023 00:48
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- Finger Prince
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Published my theoretical burger recipe in the prestigious scholarly journal Handheld Science
Finger Prince fucked around with this message at 01:30 on Aug 20, 2023
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Aug 20, 2023 01:25
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- DoomCroissant
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Roll D3 for Delicious Flaky Crust
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i got my master's degree in burgerology at the hamburger university
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Aug 20, 2023 02:40
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- canyoneer
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I only have canyoneyes for you
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"i thought you said we were having steamed clams"
"oh no, STEM hams!"
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Aug 20, 2023 03:47
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- Gaylor Moon
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Gender? I hardly know'er
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does it come w/ fries & a soda??
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Aug 20, 2023 07:29
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- Finger Prince
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Destroyer of flavor
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Aug 20, 2023 14:21
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- Finger Prince
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Sure, burger theory makes for a convenient, easily digestible conceptualization, but we thought that about cheese string theory until someone brought up lactose intolerance.
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Aug 20, 2023 16:46
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- DoomCroissant
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Roll D3 for Delicious Flaky Crust
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what is the academic position on dr. dave thomas' theory of square pattyerization
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Aug 21, 2023 14:12
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- Buttchocks
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No, I like my hat, thanks.
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My university's burger textbooks haven't been updated in decades. There's a chapter called "Hamburger Sandwiches in the Space Age: Styrofoam and Atomic Broilers?"
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Aug 21, 2023 15:12
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- ShimmyGuy
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One morning, Shimmy awoke to find he was a awesome shiny bug.
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No you don't understand our workers are skilled, they just believe in maintaining schrodinger's pickles
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Aug 21, 2023 16:02
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- Buttchocks
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No, I like my hat, thanks.
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So instead of putting our burger on the grill, we're going to put it where the grill would be three parallel worlds away. This allows us to do half flips instead of full flips. This shaves 23 seconds off our cooking time, but causes the grill to crash if you put a cheese slice on top of the burger, which is why you instead need to have the bun and cheese slice next to each other in your inventory. In my previous video, I showed how to trick the memory slot into creating a whole bun from only one bun fragment...
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Aug 21, 2023 16:35
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- canyoneer
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I only have canyoneyes for you
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sandwich fundamentalists opened an elaborate museum in which they argue, against the commonly accepted science, that burgers could not exist
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Aug 21, 2023 17:53
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- Buttchocks
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No, I like my hat, thanks.
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Burger Luke theory
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Aug 23, 2023 18:04
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- How Wonderful!
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I only have excellent ideas
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walking crisply into the auditorium in a black turtle neck, pencil skirt, boots, hair in a severe bun. 200 terrified harvard undergrads hold their breath. I walk to the chalk board and with ruthless, precise strokes write JACQUES DERRIDA on the board. I stare and then write ""IL N'Y A PAS DE HORS-BRIOCHE." confused silence, the dim sounds of a handful of pencils flitting across notebooks. "What IS a burger," I ask, almost sternly. no hands emerge from the crowd. I turn to the board and draw a single black bean. and then another. and then a third, and then. the crowd loses its poo poo. an ocean of cheers, applause. bras flying in from the outfield and hitting th e drat podium. "Welcome," I say, "to english 3220."
-sig by Manifisto! goblin by Khanstant! News and possum by deep dish peat moss!
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Aug 25, 2023 23:34
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- deep dish peat moss
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nasa is spending billions of dollars every year trying to finally achieve mankind's biggest dream of a sun-grilled burger
and the russians just bought a grill
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Aug 26, 2023 04:54
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- deep dish peat moss
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Having a BBQ this weekend and considering bringing some Bose-Einstein Condiments.
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Aug 26, 2023 04:55
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- deep dish peat moss
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Would you like the Small, Medium, or Hypothesize?
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Aug 26, 2023 04:58
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- Finger Prince
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Let's say your friend is grilling burgers. He's got enough for everyone there, but not enough for seconds. Some of the people are going to ask for a veggie burger, some of them are going to ask for a brat. That will free up some burgers for secondary consumption. The question is, do you also ask for a brat, increasing the number of free burgers in the pool, or do you get a burger first and hope that everyone else is going for the first option? What is the most advantageous position to take in order to maximize the number of burgers available to everyone?
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Aug 26, 2023 07:19
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- canyoneer
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I only have canyoneyes for you
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Let's say your friend is grilling burgers. He's got enough for everyone there, but not enough for seconds. Some of the people are going to ask for a veggie burger, some of them are going to ask for a brat. That will free up some burgers for secondary consumption. The question is, do you also ask for a brat, increasing the number of free burgers in the pool, or do you get a burger first and hope that everyone else is going for the first option? What is the most advantageous position to take in order to maximize the number of burgers available to everyone?
oh, this is an example of game theory from nobel prize laureate mathematician john nash! he was portrayed by russell crowe in the biographical oscar winning film "Goodburger"
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Aug 26, 2023 07:48
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- Buttchocks
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No, I like my hat, thanks.
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Would you like the Small, Medium, or Hypothesize?
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Aug 26, 2023 15:39
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- Buttchocks
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No, I like my hat, thanks.
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Hamburgler, Escher, Bach
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Aug 26, 2023 15:41
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- canyoneer
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I only have canyoneyes for you
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i'm working in the kitchen and the waiter asks which one of these heisenburgers is for table 6. I keep telling him that I either know where the burger is or which table it's going to, but never both.
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Aug 26, 2023 16:58
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- Finger Prince
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In this paper I will prove mathematically that the lines of definition for smashburger and slider never intersect.
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Aug 26, 2023 17:14
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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#
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May 6, 2024 03:46
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- baka of lathspell
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walking crisply into the auditorium in a black turtle neck, pencil skirt, boots, hair in a severe bun. 200 terrified harvard undergrads hold their breath. I walk to the chalk board and with ruthless, precise strokes write JACQUES DERRIDA on the board. I stare and then write ""IL N'Y A PAS DE HORS-BRIOCHE." confused silence, the dim sounds of a handful of pencils flitting across notebooks. "What IS a burger," I ask, almost sternly. no hands emerge from the crowd. I turn to the board and draw a single black bean. and then another. and then a third, and then. the crowd loses its poo poo. an ocean of cheers, applause. bras flying in from the outfield and hitting th e drat podium. "Welcome," I say, "to english 3220."
lol
join dork order
sig by ??? (<3 u)
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Aug 26, 2023 19:04
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