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The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > New business idea: Plurch
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Larry Cum Free
Jun 3, 2022

move it or lose it dillweed
It’s like church but you get free plantains

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 18:37
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# ? May 3, 2024 11:47
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PokeJoe
Aug 24, 2004

hail cgatan


 My church already gives out free plantains

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 18:39
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Thesaurus
Oct 3, 2004


 How does this make money?

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 18:41
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Triikan
Feb 23, 2007
Most Loved
What part of Jesus is the plantain?

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 18:47
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Modulo16
Feb 12, 2014

"Authorities say the phony Pope can be recognized by his high-top sneakers and incredibly foul mouth."

Triikan posted:

What part of Jesus is the plantain?

I think you know the answer. :wink:

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 19:31
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dervival
Apr 23, 2014

 it's his schnozz, right?

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 19:41
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TrashMammal
Nov 10, 2022

 the rod of god

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 19:42
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LiterallyATomato
Mar 17, 2009

 It's like church, but the "PL" stands for the newly added "pedophile limitations."

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 20:32
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Wifi Toilet
Oct 1, 2004

Toilet Rascal
My plurch offers plums. You worship a false plantain God and we are now at war.

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 20:39
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GetDunked
Dec 16, 2011

respectfully
in chip form?

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 21:11
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Ez8
Aug 5, 2004
 I'm in. Ground floor, baby!

Is it ok that I don't have any money?

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 21:12
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LiterallyATomato
Mar 17, 2009

Ez8 posted:

I'm in. Ground floor, baby!

Is it ok that I don't have any money?

If plurch is anything like church, you can trick idiots into GIVING you money!

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 21:17
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Smugworth
Apr 18, 2003

 Fartch

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 21:24
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Malinois
Jun 13, 2003

Wifi Toilet posted:

My plurch offers plums. You worship a false plantain God and we are now at war.

look at the prunitarian over here lmao

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 21:35
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Spinz
Jan 7, 2020

I ordered luscious new gemstones from India and made new earrings for my SA mart thread

Remember my earrings and art are much better than my posting

New stuff starts towards end of page 3 of the thread
Take me to plurch

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 21:47
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Fartington Butts
Jan 21, 2007


 Are they at least fried first? I mean I'm probably still not interested, but it at least makes me think about it.

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 21:49
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nice obelisk idiot
May 18, 2023

funerary linens looking like dishrags

Fartington Butts posted:

Are they at least fried first? I mean I'm probably still not interested, but it at least makes me think about it.
For sure. They can even do mofongo if you want it. veg mofongo also available.

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 22:07
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cumpantry
Dec 18, 2020

Thesaurus posted:

How does this make money?

money?

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 22:15
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Literally A Person
Jan 1, 1970

Smugworth Wuz Here
Plurch?

A trifle!

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 22:58
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lipid
Feb 21, 2001
 Some friends of mine were married by a plantain from the Plurch.

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 23:45
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Larry Cum Free
Jun 3, 2022

move it or lose it dillweed

Thesaurus posted:

How does this make money?

How does any church make money?

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 23:46
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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

Larry Cum Free posted:

It’s like church but you get free plantains

those tiny bananas? I'm on board

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 23:47
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Larry Cum Free
Jun 3, 2022

move it or lose it dillweed

Mumpy Puffinz posted:

those tiny bananas?

hmm. Yes and no

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 23:48
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Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020

 i don't like plantains but i do like ceremonial robes. what do your vestments look like?

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 23:49
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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

Larry Cum Free posted:

hmm. Yes and no

are they tiny bananas or not? This is a deal breaker

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 23:50
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BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag
My sister is a plun that lives in a plonvent.

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 23:54
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Grey Cat
Jun 3, 2023

Doing stuff and things


 Take me to plurch, I'll plorship like a plog at the pline of your plies.

* # ? Aug 20, 2023 23:56
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Literally A Person
Jan 1, 1970

Smugworth Wuz Here
Is plurch like one of these things where I have to care about poo poo and reevaluate the way I impact the world around me or can I get away with some lip service and a couple bucks in the collection plate.

* # ? Aug 21, 2023 00:41
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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

Literally A Person posted:

Is plurch like one of these things where I have to care about poo poo and reevaluate the way I impact the world around me or can I get away with some lip service and a couple bucks in the collection plate.

5% of your yearly income

* # ? Aug 21, 2023 00:43
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Smugworth
Apr 18, 2003

Literally A Person posted:

Is plurch like one of these things where I have to care about poo poo and reevaluate the way I impact the world around me or can I get away with some lip service and a couple bucks in the collection plate.

Tithing? A trifle!

* # ? Aug 21, 2023 00:46
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Literally A Person
Jan 1, 1970

Smugworth Wuz Here

Mumpy Puffinz posted:

5% of your yearly income

To feel morally superior to the people I encounter in everyday life? Seems like a steal really

* # ? Aug 21, 2023 00:46
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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

Literally A Person posted:

To feel morally superior to the people I encounter in everyday life? Seems like a steal really

you still have to feel bad about yourself. Or at least pretend to in a public setting

* # ? Aug 21, 2023 00:48
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BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag
I like the plotluck dinners

* # ? Aug 21, 2023 00:49
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Smugworth
Apr 18, 2003

BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:

I like the plotluck dinners

Mmm. Fried plantains. Raw plantains. Plantain salad. Plantainloaf. Plantain surprise. Mofongo. Oops! All plantains ambrosia.

* # ? Aug 21, 2023 00:56
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Debunk This!
Apr 12, 2011


 Enjoying a nice cool glass of pilk at plurch.

* # ? Aug 21, 2023 01:00
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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

Smugworth posted:

Mmm. Fried plantains. Raw plantains. Plantain salad. Plantainloaf. Plantain surprise. Mofongo. Oops! All plantains ambrosia.

yeah, those little bananas

* # ? Aug 21, 2023 01:00
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Grey Cat
Jun 3, 2023

Doing stuff and things

Mumpy Puffinz posted:

5% of your yearly income

I was made to pay 10% growing up so this is a steal really.

* # ? Aug 21, 2023 01:05
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Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

Grey Cat posted:

I was made to pay 10% growing up so this is a steal really.

10% was unsustainable. People just don't make as much as they used to

* # ? Aug 21, 2023 01:10
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Larry Cum Free
Jun 3, 2022

move it or lose it dillweed

BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:

My sister is a plun that lives in a plonvent.
* # ? Aug 21, 2023 01:10
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# ? May 3, 2024 11:47
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Larry Cum Free
Jun 3, 2022

move it or lose it dillweed
The Plurch of Reasonable Price of Planter day Tains

* # ? Aug 21, 2023 01:11
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The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > New business idea: Plurch
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