NFL Week 5 Aftermath: With a rebel yell, she yelled Moore! Moore! MOORE!

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > NFL Week 5 Aftermath: With a rebel yell, she yelled Moore! Moore! MOORE!

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Android Apocalypse: Apr 28, 2009; The future is
AUTOMATED
and you are
OBSOLETE; Illegal Hen

Android Apocalypse posted:

If the Chicago Bears go 0-17 I'll drink Malort in solidarity to all my Midwest goons.

There are supposedly bars here in Portland that carry Malort so this can happen.

Saved by the incompetence of the Washington Commanders.

I should still look for what bars in Portland carry Malort.

Meanwhile in the District of Columbia, Al Michaels describes the Washington Commanders:

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:22

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# ? May 7, 2024 16:52

pro starcraft loser: Jan 23, 2006; Stand back, this could get messy.

Honestly Commanders...

Just forfeit. Don't tell anyone because the NFL will get all pissy.

But just...don't play. What is the point?

You lose in every "Prime" time game against loving gimmies every year for almost as long as I've watched.

You broke the Detroit streak, you got loving CRUSHED by the 2023 loving Bears AT HOME.

Don't take the injuries. Don't take the embarrassment.

Stay home you loving losers. Move to London so I can root for Baltimore with a clean conscience.

Go O's bitch.

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:23

Doctor Teeth: Sep 12, 2008

they should be called the washington clowns. because of all the clowns in washington

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:24

kiimo: Jul 24, 2003

DJ Moore is un loving real

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:25

MJeff: Jun 2, 2011; THE LIAR

Man.

Things don't look good for the Football Panthers of Carolina right now, do they?

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:25

Vincent Van Goatse: Nov 8, 2006; Enjoy every sandwich.; Smellrose

This is the memorial Dick Butkus would've wanted.

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:25

Shindragon: Jun 6, 2011; by Athanatos

TNF games are just pure entertainment. Imagine giving up 40 to the Bears. Just drat.

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:25

AndrewP: Apr 21, 2010

~~Bears~~ Commanders rushed for 29 yards :wtf:

e: sorry I meant WFT

AndrewP fucked around with this message at 04:34 on Oct 6, 2023

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:27

Intruder: Mar 5, 2003; I got a taste for blown saves

I found a place that sells Malort a few miles from where I live, gonna go buy a bottle in honor of DJ Moore and keep it around to prank friends/family

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:27

kiimo: Jul 24, 2003

MJeff posted:

Man.

Things don't look good for the Football Panthers of Carolina right now, do they?

I say this delicately because I don't want to hurt feelings and the jury's still out but...

could have had Stroud or Richardson

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:28

mllaneza: Apr 28, 2007; Veteran, Bermuda Triangle Expeditionary Force, 1993-1952

I blame the writers' strike.

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:28

pro starcraft loser: Jan 23, 2006; Stand back, this could get messy.

AndrewP posted:

Bears rushed for 29 yards

Some genius found out you can just throw against the Commies and get 15+ yards every time.

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:30

Doctor Teeth: Sep 12, 2008

maybe it wasn't the bears that turdified chase claypool

maybe clayppol further turdified the bears

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:31

FAT32 SHAMER: Aug 16, 2012

My guess here is they studied the tape extra hard and noticed that the commies don�t have a secondary and took the free W lol

I don�t see them continuing the streak against the vikings

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:34

Digital Jedi: May 28, 2007; Fallen Rib

DA BEARS

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:38

Bip Roberts: Mar 29, 2005

FAT32 SHAMER posted:

My guess here is they studied the tape extra hard and noticed that the commies don�t have a secondary and took the free W lol

I don�t see them continuing the streak against the vikings

Vikes are pretty much free yardage too

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:40

Darth Brooks: Jan 15, 2005; I do not wear this mask to protect me. I wear it to protect you from me.

Congrats Bears fans.

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:40

Dexo: Aug 15, 2009; A city that was to live by night after the wilderness had passed. A city that was to forge out of steel and blood-red neon its own peculiar wilderness.

https://twitter.com/BrettKollmann/status/1710137763755077904

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:42

R.D. Mangles: Jan 10, 2004

da bears

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:49

Dexo: Aug 15, 2009; A city that was to live by night after the wilderness had passed. A city that was to forge out of steel and blood-red neon its own peculiar wilderness.

https://twitter.com/MagicJohnson/status/1710137027583217979

God Magic rocks.

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:49

R.D. Mangles: Jan 10, 2004

Dexo posted:

https://twitter.com/MagicJohnson/status/1710137027583217979

God Magic rocks.

that's right magic

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:52

Criminal Minded: Jan 4, 2005; Spring break forever

Getting doubled up by the 2023 Bears is a special ignominy but I'm happy for Chicagoons

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:56

joe football: Dec 22, 2012

Justin Fields is now tied for the league lead in TD passes, with Kirk Cousins

NFC North in a golden age of quarterbacking

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:57

R.D. Mangles: Jan 10, 2004

i have never seen a bears wide receiver just absolutely dominate a game like that before

# ? Oct 6, 2023 04:59

Cavauro: Jan 9, 2008

it seems like chase claypool is the wr joe burrow

# ? Oct 6, 2023 05:01

Dexo: Aug 15, 2009; A city that was to live by night after the wilderness had passed. A city that was to forge out of steel and blood-red neon its own peculiar wilderness.

R.D. Mangles posted:

i have never seen a bears wide receiver just absolutely dominate a game like that before

I think there was one Alshon game, but yeah...

# ? Oct 6, 2023 05:01

Alaois: Feb 7, 2012

R.D. Mangles posted:

that's right magic

# ? Oct 6, 2023 05:03

really queer Christmas: Apr 22, 2014

# ? Oct 6, 2023 05:08

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

Bears win and are still the leaders in the clubhouse for the number 1 overall pick

# ? Oct 6, 2023 05:18

Kurgarra Queen: Jun 11, 2008; GIVE ME MORE
SUPER BOWL
WINS

Justin Fields�.not bad? But DJ Moore�.he�s good.

The Commanders, well, they need to burn all the trash out of the dumpster, get a new name that doesn�t suck, and start a new life. Perhaps one where they�re not literally less competent than the 2023 Denver Broncos�

# ? Oct 6, 2023 05:59

Mystic Stylez: Dec 19, 2009

pro starcraft loser posted:

Honestly Commanders...

Just forfeit. Don't tell anyone because the NFL will get all pissy.

But just...don't play. What is the point?

You lose in every "Prime" time game against loving gimmies every year for almost as long as I've watched.

You broke the Detroit streak, you got loving CRUSHED by the 2023 loving Bears AT HOME.

Don't take the injuries. Don't take the embarrassment.

Stay home you loving losers. Move to London so I can root for Baltimore with a clean conscience.

Go O's bitch.

this is what happens when you break the Ravens preseason streak

# ? Oct 6, 2023 06:16

Hot Diggity!: Apr 3, 2010; SKELITON_BRINGING_U_ON.GIF

Dexo posted:

https://twitter.com/BrettKollmann/status/1710137763755077904

Malort is 70 proof c'mon man

# ? Oct 6, 2023 06:28

Intruder: Mar 5, 2003; I got a taste for blown saves

Hot Diggity! posted:

Malort is 70 proof c'mon man

Feel like the problem with drinking a lot of Malort, based on what I've heard since I've yet to try it, isn't the alcohol

# ? Oct 6, 2023 07:02

Ornery and Hornery: Oct 22, 2020

Is it fair to say that the bears will now go undefeated straight to the playoffs?

Sources say maybe

# ? Oct 6, 2023 07:10

Toaster Beef: Jan 23, 2007; that's not nature's way

Another data point for those of us who insist you can't gauge any NFC East team by anything they do against other NFC East teams

# ? Oct 6, 2023 11:19

AndrewP: Apr 21, 2010

Washington has been stunningly mediocre for 30 years. Just season after season of .500ish football and bottom-half division finishes. Here�s to another one.

AndrewP fucked around with this message at 12:32 on Oct 6, 2023

# ? Oct 6, 2023 12:30

Chris James 2: Aug 9, 2012

Living near the area (not being a fan but being around them) the vibe was definitely one of "Snyder's gone, this year's a win no matter what". Curious to see if that changes after literally making the worst team in the league look great on primetime

AndrewP posted:

Washington has been stunningly mediocre for 30 years. Just season after season of .500ish football and bottom-half division finishes. Here�s to another one.

Every decade of my lifetime they've gotten 10+ wins exactly once per decade

1994-2000: 1 (1999, 10-6)
2001-2010: 1 (2005, 10-6)
2011-2020: 1 (2012, 10-6)

It'll happen sometime in the next six years, since it hasn't happened in 2021 or 2022 and won't happen this year. Rest assured on two things: it will happen once, and it will absolutely be a fluke that doesn't happen again for a while after it does

# ? Oct 6, 2023 12:43

Bird in a Blender: Nov 17, 2005; It's amazing what they can do with computers these days.

Dexo posted:

I think there was one Alshon game, but yeah...

Yea Alshon holds the record for most yards for a game against the Vikings. That guy was great for like 2 years.

# ? Oct 6, 2023 13:30

Dexo: Aug 15, 2009; A city that was to live by night after the wilderness had passed. A city that was to forge out of steel and blood-red neon its own peculiar wilderness.

https://twitter.com/NickiJhabvala/status/1710188355000877247

# ? Oct 6, 2023 18:16

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# ? May 7, 2024 16:52

DariusLikewise: Oct 4, 2008; You wore that on Halloween?

Rivera is going to get immediately fired again by a new billionaire owner replacing the old ousted racist billionaire

# ? Oct 6, 2023 18:24

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > NFL Week 5 Aftermath: With a rebel yell, she yelled Moore! Moore! MOORE!

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