|
Gentlemen, I present The Future of all movie scriptsquote:Any scene, directed by Michael Bay For the benefit of keeping the thread not getting unwatchable, I ask that you please only post one script at a time. a mod from the something awful forum saves the world FADE IN: EXT. SOMETHING AWFUL FORUM - DAY The sun blazes down on a server farm in the middle of the desert. The heat haze makes the rows of servers seem to shimmer. A single, lone MODERATOR, typing furiously on a laptop, is standing amidst this technological wilderness. He is bathed in the green glow of the servers. Suddenly, a group of TROLLS burst out of the horizon in a convoy of monster trucks, raising clouds of dust as they approach. The pounding beat of METALLICA's "Enter Sandman" echoes across the desert. The Moderator's fingers dance across the keyboard, ready for the attack. He clicks "BAN" just as the first troll's truck hits an unseen ramp and flies towards him in slow motion. The truck explodes mid-air, raining debris on the Moderator who stands unflinchingly, still typing. MODERATOR (over the explosion) You're banned! Smiling, he hits enter on his keyboard, sending a ripple of energy that transforms the remaining monster trucks into harmless scooters. The Trolls, shocked, tumble onto the sand. Suddenly, a massive shadow looms over the Moderator. He turns to see a gargantuan ROBOTIC TROLL, a grotesquely twisted version of a forum troll, towering over him. ROBOTIC TROLL I am...The Ban Evader! The two lock eyes, the tension palpable. The ROBOTIC TROLL lunges, but the Moderator's fingers are already flying over the keyboard. MODERATOR (over the sound of clashing metal and explosions) Not on my watch! A massive "BAN HAMMER" manifests from the computer code and slams into the robotic troll, sending it rocketing back. It crashes into the server farm, causing a massive explosion, and turning the robot into pixels. The shockwave from the blast sends the Moderator's hat spinning into the air. He catches it, puts it back on, and turns back to his laptop, typing away amidst the flaming wreckage. As the camera pulls back, the final server winks out, creating a small electronic "pop." CUT TO BLACK: FADE IN: Title: "SOMETHING AWFUL: THE BAN HAMMER" ROLL CREDITS. TO BE CONTINUED... Comstar fucked around with this message at 09:54 on Nov 7, 2023 |
# ? Nov 7, 2023 09:52 |
|
|
# ? May 11, 2024 13:28 |
|
I’d watch it
|
# ? Nov 7, 2023 13:03 |
|
I ain't reading that put it in video form.
|
# ? Nov 7, 2023 13:18 |
|
didn't read but I'nm srue it's epiuc poo poo op
|
# ? Nov 7, 2023 13:36 |
|
its all nice on rice posted:I ain't reading that put it in video form.
|
# ? Nov 7, 2023 14:05 |
|
I hope one day I walk away from an explosion in slow motion, and don't look back.
|
# ? Nov 7, 2023 14:28 |
|
bradzilla posted:didn't read but I'nm srue it's epiuc poo poo op another freaking ftw ai thread. goons cant get enough
|
# ? Nov 7, 2023 14:54 |
|
FADE IN: DINGY BASEMENT CORNstar sits in front of his heavily encrusted keyboard and monitor, typing. CORNstar: Hahahahahahahaha! All the Something Awful dot com goons will be sooooooo impressed by my BASED new thread! CORNstar waits a little, then reads some replies to himself, his lips moving. He bursts into tears. then implodes, disappearing up his own CORNhole. SFX: Extreme sucking noise. ROLL CREDITS
|
# ? Nov 7, 2023 15:24 |
|
LOWTAX (whispered) Showtime... He takes a breath, raises the gun to his temple, and pulls the trigger. But instead of a bullet, a small, sleek DRONE flies out of the barrel, soaring into the sky, CAMERA LENS sparkling under the moonlight.
|
# ? Nov 7, 2023 15:32 |
|
Imagine I asked AI to make an ASCII goatse and posted it
|
# ? Nov 7, 2023 15:40 |
|
hot cocoa on the couch posted:another freaking ftw ai thread. goons cant get enough Read this and thought, “what do cars have to do with this?” Then it hit me. I’m dumb.
|
# ? Nov 7, 2023 15:57 |
|
its all nice on rice posted:I ain't reading that put it in video form. Mod challenge! EDIT: gently caress, should have let this dead thread die.
|
# ? Nov 9, 2023 13:17 |
|
|
# ? Nov 9, 2023 14:33 |
|
it's not 2009 op
|
# ? Nov 9, 2023 21:24 |
|
INT. MATRIX HEADQUARTERS - NIGHT We see NEO (30s, black sunglasses, leather coat), MORPHEUS (50s, bald, reflective sunglasses) and TRINITY (30s, short hair, tough demeanor) standing in front of a massive computer screen. MORPHEUS Neo, this is your last chance. Once you're in, there's no going back. Neo nods, pulling out a RED PILL. He swallows it. Suddenly... CHYRON: SPERM BANK HEIST EXT. SPERM BANK - NIGHT A fleet of BLACK SPORTS CARS transform into ROBOTIC WARRIORS. TRANSFORMER 1 We must secure the seed! PAN to an enormous TANKER TRUCK, filled with liquid nitrogen and donor sperm. INT. MATRIX HEADQUARTERS - NIGHT Neo, Morpheus, and Trinity watch as the Transformers battle the bank security. Morpheus turns to Neo. MORPHEUS You must understand, Neo, that in a world of artificial insemination, Matrix controls the seed. Suddenly, Neo's hand TRANSFORMS INTO A GIGANTIC SPERM-SHOOTING CANNON. NEO Whoa. INT. SPERM BANK - NIGHT Transformer 1 lunges for the tanker, but it EXPLODES, sending a RAIN OF FROZEN SPERM across the city. EXT. CITY SKYLINE - NIGHT A slow-motion DOLLY ZOOM of the skyscrapers, covered in white. Suddenly, Neo appears, the city skyline reflected in his sunglasses. He raises his sperm cannon, firing a HOT CUM MISSILE into the sky. The missile explodes in a SHOWER OF SPARKLING JIZZ, raining down on the Transformers. NEO I guess it's raining men. The Transformers short circuit, collapsing. INT. MATRIX HEADQUARTERS - NIGHT Morpheus and Trinity watch the screen as the city is covered in sperm. Morpheus turns to Neo. MORPHEUS You've done well, Neo. You've freed the seed. Suddenly, a small MICROWAVE in the corner starts to beep. Morpheus opens it, revealing a BURNT POPCORN BAG. MORPHEUS My popcorn... The microwave EXPLODES, sending popcorn flying. Neo, Morpheus, and Trinity are blown back, landing in a pile of popcorn. FADE OUT. Cue HEART-POUNDING MUSIC. The credits roll over a MONTAGE of the city, covered in sperm, as the sun rises. FADE TO BLACK. THE END
|
# ? Nov 9, 2023 23:00 |
|
that;s enough boom now i guess
|
# ? Nov 9, 2023 23:44 |
|
|
# ? May 11, 2024 13:28 |
|
|
# ? Nov 10, 2023 00:19 |