UKMT Winterval 2023/24 - Zero-Tolerance Zones in Hotpot Areas

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT Winterval 2023/24 - Zero-Tolerance Zones in Hotpot Areas

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(Thread IKs: OwlFancier)

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

The Question IRL posted:

I started my car a good five minutes before I was going to leave the house to defrost it.
The wife took her car to drop the baby to childcare.

I go out to drive off, only to discover that my car automatically locked itself and thus I was locked out of the car. (I thought the car only auto locked when it was moving. Very frustrating. )

I wait for the wife to come home so I can use her spare key to open my car. Discover that the clicker won't work on a locked car with the engine running.

I then had to look for the keyhole on the car. But there is no visible one.

5 minutes of searching Google I find that with Kia Sportages you can use the car key to pry off a part of the door handle to get access to the key hole and manually unlock the car.

Not a huge issue, but when you are truing to leave the house in the freezing cold, it's very frustrating.

The future is now

# ¿ Dec 1, 2023 11:47

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# ¿ May 9, 2024 10:42

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Most people expect corporal/capital punishment to be a service that the state provides, like having your bins collected. I wonder whether it would have the same support if all the state infrastructure was withdrawn. Would they still believe in "an eye for an eye" if they were just given a court date and a leaflet on enucleation and told to get on with it? A lot of people I know would balk at jointing a chicken

# ¿ Dec 2, 2023 13:13

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Guavanaut posted:

The pro hanging types also tend to have a lot of opinions about bins.

Due to ongoing austerity measures, your bins will now be emptied by the hangman

# ¿ Dec 2, 2023 14:22

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Ate steak
Ate chips
Didn't eat salad

Simple as

# ¿ Dec 2, 2023 22:55

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Jippa posted:

Cumin definitely has to be used intentionally. It's not just a "chuck it in" type of flavour.

It would be a very difficult recipe if it required you to use cumin accidentally

# ¿ Dec 3, 2023 12:55

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Bobby Deluxe posted:

I've cracked it. Once Musk gets to Mars, he will set up fully automated space libertarianism, at which point Britain will be obligated to go to war with the Planet of the Nonces. Hence, space wars.

Bold of you to assume that Britain won't be aligned the nonce planet

# ¿ Dec 3, 2023 18:15

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Soricidus posted:

can he really afford to lose the liberal boomer demographic on top of everyone on the left?

*checks notes* yes

# ¿ Dec 3, 2023 20:01

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

fuctifino posted:

We almost went to war with the Netherlands

Bung a bob for Boris' Benelux biolab blag

# ¿ Dec 4, 2023 20:14

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

The 9/11 of Chernobyls

# ¿ Dec 5, 2023 19:12

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

We would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for those woke Rwandans

# ¿ Dec 6, 2023 21:11

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Every manifesto pledge is a :toxx:

clause

# ¿ Dec 6, 2023 21:47

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

forkboy84 posted:

I mean they can't kick the can down the road much longer, but another unelected PM during this parliament absolutely can happen.

Dunno that I expect it to, the Tories surely cannot be that daft. The chalice is well and truly poisoned, it'd have to be a deluded idiot who wants it. I suppose they have plenty of those tho

The chalice is poisoned but you respawn on the lecture circuit or in a thinktank

# ¿ Dec 6, 2023 21:57

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Not only are they planning to oust are boat-stopping boy Rishi, they're doing it while eating foreign muck

# ¿ Dec 9, 2023 20:15

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

I reckon you could buy yourself a backbencher for a couple grand. Crowdfund ourselves a tame Tory

# ¿ Dec 9, 2023 21:24

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

One free Commons vote each week, plus one subscriber-only bonus

# ¿ Dec 9, 2023 22:08

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Pierson posted:

The localest of local news but laffo at Sunderland's new station and T&M Metro trying to bravely post through it:

https://twitter.com/My_Metro/status/1733122123755876727

Two ticket machines, 24 seats and some vending machines. At least the old had a Burger King in it.

"im not owned! im not owned!!", i continue to insist as i slowly shrink and transform into a bus stop

# ¿ Dec 9, 2023 22:48

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Potemkin village-rear end train station

# ¿ Dec 9, 2023 23:11

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Apraxin posted:

chat gpt, create the world's worst, most confused political metaphor

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-politics-67670625

It's swOts, you dullards. School swAts sounds like something terrible that only happens in America

# ¿ Dec 10, 2023 10:30

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Gonzo McFee posted:

https://twitter.com/MichelleMone/status/1733790015183061446?t=5QgNli-Z-M1SPREv6Sx5yQ&s=19

# ¿ Dec 10, 2023 16:03

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

It was unsettling watching Nigel Farage - who is never not "on" politically but whose politics are themselves a kind of politics-denial - in a space which, due to its format and audience, has to stay blandly apolitical. It's supposed to be a gruelling ordeal of cockroaches and pig vaginas but in many ways it must have been an almost heavenly fantasy for him: TV cameras trained on his every interaction, with viewers ready to vote out anyone who dares do a Politics in his presence. Brexit being the right thing to do was a "point of view" that everyone was required to respect, and if you didn't, you got disappeared in 24 hours.

But of course the showrunners well knew all of this; that's why he was paid 1.5 million quid to be there in the first place

# ¿ Dec 11, 2023 00:25

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Multi-Hitler drifting

# ¿ Dec 13, 2023 02:04

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Ms Adequate posted:

They were probably hoping we'd benefit a bit from the US economy doing well* on many measures

Copying someone else's homework at the last second with a hosed pen and a poo poo exercise book and wondering why your mark is lower

# ¿ Dec 13, 2023 09:40

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Changing my name to Exceso Calorias

# ¿ Dec 16, 2023 13:49

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

smellmycheese posted:

The RETVRN right wing mob are getting decidedly kinky…

We are the knights who say "no"

# ¿ Dec 20, 2023 19:55

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

I'm not sure I fully accept Boyle's explanation of the joke, but the interview is a masterclass in responding to an adversarial interviewer. Osman audibly corncobs after the "the audience voted for it" line

# ¿ Dec 23, 2023 12:42

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

All cordless vacuums are poo poo. They might be easier to use if you have mobility issues but they don't retain anything other than powderised dust and dirt and have a million points of failure. HENRY SUPREMACY

# ¿ Dec 24, 2023 02:35

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

DesperateDan posted:

if you really need a cordless then get a makita 2x18V backpack one and become the appliance

Oh I need this

# ¿ Dec 24, 2023 12:19

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

smellmycheese posted:

Still, swings and roundabouts. Keith is going to have a big old crackdown on sweets

What the gently caress. I'm not going to two different shops for my Airheads and Lady Di mugs. You can gently caress that

# ¿ Dec 26, 2023 00:55

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Your kids will probably feel loads better about never being able to afford their own home when Keith's anti-money-laundering task force dawn raid Fone Converters

# ¿ Dec 26, 2023 01:10

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Ms Adequate posted:

The world is a truly bizarre place, American candy shops are money laundering fronts? I thought people just liked Mike & Ike's

If you've ever wondered "huh, it's weird that place is still open": money laundering

# ¿ Dec 26, 2023 01:15

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

This paragraph from the article is key:

quote:

Marks & Spencer’s chief executive, Stuart Machin, warned in April that London was “on life support”, in part because of the “proliferation of tacky candy stores” on Oxford Street, which had left the city “a national embarrassment”.

The "dodgy" aspect is less the financial crime and more the unsightliness. Ate that foreign muck, love me Percy Pigs

# ¿ Dec 26, 2023 01:20

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Until the title card came up in the trailer I was convinced Rebel Moon was a Firefly reboot

# ¿ Dec 26, 2023 01:42

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

High street landlords are also so desperate to find tenants to avoid responsibility for business rates that they're hardly going to turn down CRIME CANDY LTD

# ¿ Dec 26, 2023 11:34

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

serious gaylord posted:

You say that but theres been a shop on Poole High Street called Toast 2 Roast which has been empty for at least 12 years. Still got all the chairs and stuff inside, its like they locked the place up and just never came back.

Oh we've got one of those. 10 or so derelict flats on the high street. AFAIK the actual owner is overseas and uncontactable/doesn't give a poo poo so it has just sat there gradually falling apart for going on 20 years now

# ¿ Dec 26, 2023 11:55

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

Dabir posted:

A good use for eminent domain at last

I forgot to mention that the building in question is listed and effectively gutted. It's probably too much hassle, especially for a struggling local authority.

# ¿ Dec 26, 2023 13:29

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

I never realised the conspiracy theory-as-nimbyism aspect of chemtrails until now. When I'm on a plane, it's cool and good. When other people are in planes, it's the Illuminati making the sky gay

# ¿ Dec 26, 2023 14:45

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

According to my ~~uncle~~ friend who works for ~~Nintendo~~ HMRC the following are all rife with money laundering/tax evasion/money laundering:

Nail bars
Barbers
Takeaways
Taxi firms
Window cleaners
Hand car washes

The HMRC can't do poo poo about any of this due to a combination of the high burden of proof and the high proportion of cash transactions. Occasionally some weak-rear end civil proceedings for paying below minimum wage.

Disclaimer: these are not my opinions but rather those of a filthy loving fed, so take with a pinch of salt

# ¿ Dec 26, 2023 17:17

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

# ¿ Dec 26, 2023 18:20

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

I always hated when Paxo would sneer at contestants who knew the answer to geeky pop-culture questions. Like, don't kid yourself mate, it's a loving gameshow

# ¿ Dec 27, 2023 23:54

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# ¿ May 9, 2024 10:42

Wachter: Mar 23, 2007; You and whose knees?

I wonder what he means by stability as contrasted with "left" financial stability. Maybe someone from Serco comes round your house with a spirit level

# ¿ Dec 29, 2023 10:41

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT Winterval 2023/24 - Zero-Tolerance Zones in Hotpot Areas

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