admit ur crimes

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Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

absolution is possible but not guaranteed. post those crimes and be judged ITT

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# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 00:16

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# ¿ May 10, 2024 10:46

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

i'll start. i haven't had car insurance for the past year but i drive every day. i know it's illegal but it saves me a lot of money. i kind of miss the crime weed days when i was breaking the law everyday, but now weed is legal so i've resorted to car crimes instead :shrug:

i await ur judgement byob :pray:

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# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 00:17

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

baka fwocka fwame posted:

when i went to library convention i took a healthy dose of swag from all the tables & may have accidentally an item that don't know about if i should've.

f it this is byob we commit crimes.

gonna need the deets on this item pls

# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 00:37

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

databasic posted:

gonna need the deets on library convention pls

also my crimes are basically exclusively weed-related and tbh uninteresting.

hey some of us miss crime weed. keep on breakin the law borther :twisted:

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# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 01:37

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

frump truck posted:

but it was in Japan, so "breaking in" entailed just stepping over the tiniest suggestion of a barrier

seems fine to me but i wouldn't be surprised if urban exploration turned out 2 be punishable by public hanging in a place like japan. good thing u didn't get caught. i absolve u of all wrongdoing and or donkey brains.

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# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 02:00

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

frump truck posted:

also i did DRUGS a few times

drugs are fine and usually good :haibrower:

# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 02:01

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

frump truck posted:

does wandering into bloomingdales while tripping because you were too cold out on the street count as a crime. it was a weird place to exist at that moment

nah that's no crime but they know ur tripping!!!!!! don't stick around too long

# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 02:02

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

RavenousScoot posted:

I drink room temp black coffee
usually don't bother to refridgerate beer
eat kiwi with the skin and hair on
eat shrimp with the tails (tail first!) (as part of a dish, not cocktail style)
eat leftovers first thing in the morning (any type)
will microwave seafood at work

where 2 begin

# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 02:12

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

RavenousScoot posted:

usually don't bother to refridgerate beer

will microwave seafood at work

unforgivable :jail:

Areola Grande fucked around with this message at 02:15 on Jan 31, 2024

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# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 02:13

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

Sherbert Hoover posted:

in middle school i used to go up to people playing magic the gathering and act like i wasn't familiar with the game

i would ask questions to get them used to me, then i would reach over and point to a card at the far end of the table, pocketing several closer cards with my other hand

i did this many times

sleight of hand is a useful skill which i hone often. having said that, theft is bad. i cast trample upon thee

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# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 02:31

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

frump truck posted:

is it a crime to do a first date so badly that your date decides she's moving back home to Australia

this was a self own. no harm done :shrug:

# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 02:49

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

Chewbecca posted:

I used to turn off my webcam and microphone in meetings to play animal crossing lmao

this is no crime. this is a life hack. no sins to forgive here :hai:

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# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 02:57

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

Chewbecca posted:

Is this an endorsement to commit similar crimes in future??

indubitably my child *crosses self catholic style*

# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 03:26

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

Barking Gecko posted:

Guilty. No argument, no debate. Uninsured motorists suck.

tough but fair as always. i'm in jail now

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# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 03:32

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

databasic posted:

do you want some jail crayons

the only ones i have are glitter pastel, tho

i'll take what i can get :tipshat:

# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 03:39

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

databasic posted:

A few years ago, while ramping up for a divorce, I would vape and watercolor with like 7 notebooks in front of me. While the first layers would dry, I would add layers to the next, so I have a lot of poo poo like this hanging around:

Then I threw out all my weed and now I do something similar, but in acrylics. I'm working on a nebula mural rn.

https://imgur.com/a/EetT0kQ

that is badass. don't go to jail :haibrower:

# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 03:40

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

baka fwocka fwame posted:

um okay so forgot to respond till now and like the library convention was related to a ghost of a career i have in infosci.

but basically there were some admin cards to an lsp (essentially library mega-software) left out next to their promotional swag and i didnt even think about it before grabbing one myself. i will never use it or do anything with it. i was just like, can you imagine if tho.

when opportunity knocks u must act quickly. when I see cash on the ground or street or on the floor I always walk over, step right on top of it and check my phone until there's no one else around. that's when u collect that sweet sweet cash

good crime. don't go to jail :haibrow:

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# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 07:10

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

watho posted:

ur crimes pls?

everyone is waiting :allears:

# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 07:11

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

...Ohhhh ur a pirate. sorry 2 break it 2 u but we've always known, dread pirate watho :smuggo:

# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 08:16

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

I daresn't!

I would imagine ur crimes are space crimes and therefore classified which is indeed a shame. ever done a public poo poo outdoors?

work w/ me here gsjg

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# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 09:02

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

Barking Gecko posted:

Guilty. No argument, no debate. Uninsured motorists suck.

I'm still patiently waiting to see the litany of charges which must surely be the result of ur well known and felonious life of crime.

do go on. whether or not I call ur probation officer depends upon ur next post 🤜🤙

WE WANT UR CRIME IS :byodame:

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# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 09:53

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

mods pls change barking gecko's user name to Felonious Monk

# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 09:58

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

RavenousScoot posted:

I only admitted my crimes, didn't ask for forgiveness

🎵 bad boys bad boys 🎵

:siren:

# ¿ Jan 31, 2024 11:18

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

databasic posted:

i cried laughing at the GBS star trek thread when i clocked in before official opening hours at work this morning

can we find a crime in there? is that anything?

GBS itself earns u a misdemeanor. :jail:

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# ¿ Feb 1, 2024 03:28

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

databasic posted:

ok ty I will spend tonight in the clinker (that’s what we hardened criminals call jail _{I am so upset that there is not a reading rainbow shooting star smilie rn}

the more u know

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# ¿ Feb 1, 2024 06:21

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

Chewbecca posted:

I logged off of work 10 minutes early

that's dangerously close to stolen time but not quite. ur dismissed. walk the line from now on :toughguy:

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# ¿ Feb 1, 2024 07:01

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN posted:

I guess when I was a teen I might have, um, detonated a septic tank and the resulting cloud covered the neighborhood in a thin mist of poo poo.

a growing boy is meant 2 test his boundaries. sometimes the result is lovely but that's how we learn. consider this crime absolved gsjg

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# ¿ Feb 1, 2024 11:07

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

I'm sorry 2 disappoint but these are not crimes. tbh I was hoping for a murder or two

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# ¿ Feb 1, 2024 20:37

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

databasic posted:

how�uh�how many murderers do you know??

none so far but i'm trying!!! :imunfunny:

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# ¿ Feb 1, 2024 23:42

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

i'm thinking up some crimes i could do on my way home tonight after work just so i can have something to post about ITT

:thunk:

trespassing is p easy....

hit w/ some ideas crime crew

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# ¿ Feb 1, 2024 23:56

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

databasic posted:

turn right on red from the center lane
_{please don't do this}

great idea keep em coming

# ¿ Feb 2, 2024 00:26

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

databasic posted:

have you even thought this through

a sharpie will lose ink quickly on brick. you must use paint pens or spray paint

what an amateur

_{(edit: i am also an amateur)}

either way it's a good idea. minor crimes are p fun

# ¿ Feb 2, 2024 00:44

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

databasic posted:

you have a good point. i am pretty sure i have never signed the back of a credit card.

my mattress has plenty of tags still on it :evilbuddy:

...for now

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# ¿ Feb 2, 2024 01:41

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

watho posted:

is skating a crime?

only if ur fruitbooting

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# ¿ Feb 2, 2024 07:42

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

i smoked some chronic in my car earlier while waiting in the whataburger drive thru. what a burger indeed :burger:

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# ¿ Feb 5, 2024 02:28

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

rear end-penny posted:

I would like to put forth it is the insurance companies that are the criminals because they take a not insignificant amount of my income every year, and then they have the gall to call me and tell me will be in an accident, and the other party will sue me for more than my net worth and make me homeless forever. the same people that told me that I wasn't covered when a board fell out of the ceiling in my garage and broke my car's windshield. almost as useless as cops imo.

exactly. insure this mfers :boom: