- Comfortador
- Jul 31, 2003
-
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/84/f2/00040059.0002.png)
Just give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have.
Wait...wait.
I worry what you just heard was...
"Give me a lot of b4con_n_3ggs."
What I said was...
"Give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have"
...Do you understand?
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So I heard about Travis Kelce assaulting Andy Reid on life television, but didn't watch it until now, because I knew it would upset me.
Holy poo poo it's even worse than I thought. What the gently caress is wrong with that guy? Andy Reid is, like, the best friend to multiple generations of children. In the Chiefs universe, ANDY REID IS A COACH, who is currently putting mental health and caring for others in the spotlight.
And Travis loving Kelce ... did ... that? And thought it was going to be ... funny? What?
What an rear end in a top hat. What a stupid, self-centered, tone deaf rear end in a top hat.
Full disclosure: all the time, when I was growing up, my dad would grab me by the shoulders and shake me while he screamed in my face. He choked me more than once. He was always out of control, always in a furious rage, and always terrifying. I'm a 51 year-old man and my heart is pounding right now, recalling how I felt when I was a little boy who loved Gunther Cunningham the way today's kids love Andy Reid.
So this appalling, unforgivable, despicable act hits more than one raw nerve for me, and I'm going to say what I wish I'd been able to say when this sort of thing happened to me.
Travis Kelce, this was not okay, and your obviously insincere "apology" clearly communicates that you don't get that.
First of all, you aren't even in the segment, but you just decided to barge in and draw focus because ... why? You couldn't stand that a coach brought people together in a meaningful way that you can't? You couldn't stand that your appearance on national television to promote your wildly successful series was delayed for a few seconds while the adults talked about mental health? You wanted to manufacture a viral moment where everyone gets to see what an rear end in a top hat you are, so they'll tune in and watch you portray an rear end in a top hat in the last season of your show that celebrates how great it is to be an rear end in a top hat without ever experiencing the consequences of being an rear end in a top hat?
I really want to know what raced through his tiny little mind, and why there was no voice or person who spoke up to stop him from expressing violence towards a coach WHO WAS THERE TO TALK ABOUT HOW HIS LOVE AND EMPATHY FOR PEOPLE HAVING A TOUGH TIME MATTERED AND MADE A DIFFERENCE.
Andy Reid and his dad were there to talk about empathy, love, kindness, and caring for each other.
Travis Kelce was there to promote the final (thank god, maybe he'll go away now) season of a television series.
Like, read the room, dickhead. It isn't always about you being the center of attention. And understand what's happening in the moment, fucko. Understand that there are larger things in the world than you and your garbage ego.
You know who is watching the Today show with their parents? Kids who also watch Football. Andy Reid is an avatar for children all over the world. Children who are too small to understand Andy Reid is a coach will know that a man attacked someone they love for no reason, and that will frighten and confuse them.
Andy Reid inspired a deeply meaningful and important moment of collective support among disparate people who have been struggling through the traumas of a pandemic, daily mass shootings, the rise of fascism and everything associated with Trump's violence and cruelty.
And lovely idiot Travis Kelce couldn't leave it alone, for some reason. He had to indirectly tell everyone who opened their hearts to a coach that they were stupid, and he thought it was a good joke to physically attack and choke this character who is beloved by children and adults alike. You know what that tells impressionable young people about sharing their feelings?
Travis Kelce strikes me as a person who mocks and belittles people who are vulnerable and sensitive, and enjoys being cruel, because he feels untouchable. Maybe I'm wrong, but that's who I see whenever I can't find the remote and he's on my television.
By contrast, Andy Reid and the coaches teach and model to children all over the world that kindness and empathy aren't weak or stupid or any of the things people like Travis Kelce and my dad think they are. Andy Reid and the coaches teach children to be gentle and kind, to celebrate our different cultures and to embrace all of our complicated feelings. Andy Reid and the coaches offer comfort and friendship and support to a world that is starving for it.
I hope that, when the dust settles, Travis Kelce’s appalling behavior will be a footnote to a larger story about how, for just one day, a coach made a difference and helped millions of people who are struggling to feel a little less alone. With one question, Andy Reid got lots and lots of people speaking openly and honestly about their mental health. A nontrivial number of people who none of us will ever know were inspired by it, and that was the last little nudge they needed to make the call or send the email to being healing. Andy Reid probably saved lives and relationships by opening that conversation.
A man who would belittle and mock that isn't much of a man at all. Shame on you, Travis Kelce.
You're no Hakan
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¿
Feb 12, 2024 01:57
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¿
May 13, 2024 05:28
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- Comfortador
- Jul 31, 2003
-
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/84/f2/00040059.0002.png)
Just give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have.
Wait...wait.
I worry what you just heard was...
"Give me a lot of b4con_n_3ggs."
What I said was...
"Give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have"
...Do you understand?
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Nippleodeon. Slime lactation inc
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#
¿
Feb 12, 2024 02:32
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- Comfortador
- Jul 31, 2003
-
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/84/f2/00040059.0002.png)
Just give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have.
Wait...wait.
I worry what you just heard was...
"Give me a lot of b4con_n_3ggs."
What I said was...
"Give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have"
...Do you understand?
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All you busters hatin can see yourself out, and I don't give a poo poo about Usher
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#
¿
Feb 12, 2024 02:37
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- Comfortador
- Jul 31, 2003
-
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/84/f2/00040059.0002.png)
Just give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have.
Wait...wait.
I worry what you just heard was...
"Give me a lot of b4con_n_3ggs."
What I said was...
"Give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have"
...Do you understand?
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turns out whatever made the Lions choke was contagious
I laughed, but also gently caress you.
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#
¿
Feb 12, 2024 03:29
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- Comfortador
- Jul 31, 2003
-
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/84/f2/00040059.0002.png)
Just give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have.
Wait...wait.
I worry what you just heard was...
"Give me a lot of b4con_n_3ggs."
What I said was...
"Give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have"
...Do you understand?
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Lions Bills/Miami/Cleveland/Houston would have been better.
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#
¿
Feb 12, 2024 03:29
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- Comfortador
- Jul 31, 2003
-
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/84/f2/00040059.0002.png)
Just give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have.
Wait...wait.
I worry what you just heard was...
"Give me a lot of b4con_n_3ggs."
What I said was...
"Give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have"
...Do you understand?
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Very Cambell-ish call/play there
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#
¿
Feb 12, 2024 03:41
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- Comfortador
- Jul 31, 2003
-
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/84/f2/00040059.0002.png)
Just give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have.
Wait...wait.
I worry what you just heard was...
"Give me a lot of b4con_n_3ggs."
What I said was...
"Give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have"
...Do you understand?
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I’m so tired of listening to Nantz and Romo
Nickelodeon
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#
¿
Feb 12, 2024 03:47
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- Comfortador
- Jul 31, 2003
-
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/84/f2/00040059.0002.png)
Just give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have.
Wait...wait.
I worry what you just heard was...
"Give me a lot of b4con_n_3ggs."
What I said was...
"Give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have"
...Do you understand?
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I'd rather see a hot woman than an old wrinkled rear end in a top hat owner in his luxury box
Taylor Swift buying the Chiefs?
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#
¿
Feb 12, 2024 03:51
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- Comfortador
- Jul 31, 2003
-
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/84/f2/00040059.0002.png)
Just give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have.
Wait...wait.
I worry what you just heard was...
"Give me a lot of b4con_n_3ggs."
What I said was...
"Give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have"
...Do you understand?
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His poo poo was blocked, gently caress off nantz
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#
¿
Feb 12, 2024 04:07
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- Comfortador
- Jul 31, 2003
-
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/84/f2/00040059.0002.png)
Just give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have.
Wait...wait.
I worry what you just heard was...
"Give me a lot of b4con_n_3ggs."
What I said was...
"Give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have"
...Do you understand?
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This is like watching Brady
Totally
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¿
Feb 12, 2024 04:10
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- Comfortador
- Jul 31, 2003
-
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/84/f2/00040059.0002.png)
Just give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have.
Wait...wait.
I worry what you just heard was...
"Give me a lot of b4con_n_3ggs."
What I said was...
"Give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have"
...Do you understand?
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It would have been real fun watching the Lions get shithoused yeah
Right of all the matchups people wish for... why that? Haha.
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#
¿
Feb 12, 2024 04:18
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- Comfortador
- Jul 31, 2003
-
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/84/f2/00040059.0002.png)
Just give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have.
Wait...wait.
I worry what you just heard was...
"Give me a lot of b4con_n_3ggs."
What I said was...
"Give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have"
...Do you understand?
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Kill your loving self oval office bag.
Enjoy your ban cause jesus loving christ man.
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#
¿
Feb 12, 2024 04:55
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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#
¿
May 13, 2024 05:28
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