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Pron on VHS
Nov 14, 2005

Blood Clots
Sweat Dries
Bones Heal
Suck it Up and Keep Wrestling
Sabby Piscatelli

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fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret
Duke Ihenacho, aka “Dookie a Nacho”

Nervous
Jan 25, 2005

Why, hello, my little slice of pecan pie.
Jeremiah Masoli aka "Diesel Dixon". Followed Dennis Dixon at Oregon after their 2007 season was blown apart along with Dixon's knee in the Arizona desert. I was able to attend the 2008 Holiday Bowl and I got to watch him do this live.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Js0p82WnoVE

Later on he would steal some laptops and poo poo and get kicked off the team.

https://www.si.com/college/2010/07/29/masoli

Nervous fucked around with this message at 17:38 on Feb 13, 2024

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



David Boston had that typical WR thing where he was barely productive year 1, decent year 2, breakout star year 3 and then geared up so hard he couldn't run or catch anymore, but holy poo poo he had Clydesdale legs for arms.

Alaois
Feb 7, 2012

Arnaz Battle

fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret

Kalli posted:

David Boston had that typical WR thing where he was barely productive year 1, decent year 2, breakout star year 3 and then geared up so hard he couldn't run or catch anymore, but holy poo poo he had Clydesdale legs for arms.



Someone post a picture of LaRon Landry

fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret
White guy WRs are good for this thread:

Kevin Curtis
Dane Looker
Tom Waddle
Anthony Gonzalez

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

fartknocker posted:

White guy WRs are good for this thread:

Kevin Curtis
Dane Looker
Tom Waddle
Anthony Gonzalez

Tim Dwight

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



fartknocker posted:

White guy WRs are good for this thread:

One of the great sports videos:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eh9IRJ6FHF0

C-Euro
Mar 20, 2010

:science:
Soiled Meat
Please enjoy this random video of Alphonso Smith that I've had saved for over a decade-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ICA539aGHBo
E: Just realized the first guy to congratulate him is Kyle VandenBosch, another great name for this thread.

Kalli posted:

David Boston had that typical WR thing where he was barely productive year 1, decent year 2, breakout star year 3 and then geared up so hard he couldn't run or catch anymore, but holy poo poo he had Clydesdale legs for arms.



Buried deep in an old computer's hard drive is a recording of Lloyd Christmas talking poo poo about Drew Brees, and he name-drops David Boston. I'll go to my grave remembering the intonation that he uses when saying his name.

C-Euro fucked around with this message at 18:39 on Feb 13, 2024

Black Sunshine
Apr 4, 2004

LEFT 4 DEAD IS A LOT LIKE FOOTBALL - I JERK OFF TO BOTH

Black Lighter posted:

In the franchise mode of whichever Madden came out the year Thomas Jones was drafted, he basically always became the greatest running back of all time. 100 speed, 100 agility, 100 hands, 100 strength, 100 everything. He would inevitably become Marshall Faulk x 100, and I still find the fact that he didn't do that IRL irrationally frustrating. There's a tiny part of my brain that insists the morass of the early 2000s Arizona Cardinals kept him from becoming the GOAT, because how could the N64 Madden ratings be wrong?

In a less broken video game story, I remember Alexander Wright. He was basically a track star who couldn't catch worth a poo poo and I know you're surprised to find out he was on the Raiders in the early '90s. In one of the Tecmo Bowls, I'd move him from WR to RB and just have a fast as hell RB and it worked out really well!

For whatever reason, I always remember Chiefs legend Lake Dawson from Tecmo as well. I guess dude just had a unique name so it stuck with me.

Durandal1707
Oct 11, 2013
Luis Castillo

Alaois
Feb 7, 2012

Kalli posted:

David Boston had that typical WR thing where he was barely productive year 1, decent year 2, breakout star year 3 and then geared up so hard he couldn't run or catch anymore, but holy poo poo he had Clydesdale legs for arms.



they accurately captured David Boston's physique in NFL Street 2

Only registered members can see post attachments!

fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret

Alaois posted:

they accurately captured David Boston's physique in NFL Street 2



The names in that picture are bringing back memories of some unwatchable Dolphins teams. Just missing AJ Feeley or Rob Konrad.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



fartknocker posted:

The names in that picture are bringing back memories of some unwatchable Dolphins teams. Just missing AJ Feeley or Rob Konrad.

Needs more Randy McMichael

Alfred P. Pseudonym
May 29, 2006

And when you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss goes 8-8

Dexter Coakley

Durandal1707
Oct 11, 2013
Igor Olshansky

fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret
Eric Foster

kidcoelacanth
Sep 23, 2009

Trung Candidate

fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret
Bob Nelson

Dude was an unremarkable DT for the Packers in the late 80s, but in Tecmo Super Bowl, one of his speed stats got swapped into the wrong spot, so he was super human quick and could blow up the o-line.

Alaois
Feb 7, 2012

D.J. Shockley

Alfred P. Pseudonym
May 29, 2006

And when you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss goes 8-8

Todd Pinkston

Alaois
Feb 7, 2012

Kris Mangum

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Chris Slade

Criminal Minded
Jan 4, 2005

Spring break forever
Kyle Turley

Quiet Feet
Dec 14, 2009

THE HELL IS WITH THIS ASS!?





Durandal1707 posted:

Igor Olshansky

I don't know anything about him but for some reason any player with -sky in their name always sticks in my head.

seiferguy
Jun 9, 2005

FLAWED
INTUITION



Toilet Rascal
Thinking of some 3rd / 4th option Seahawk WRs:

- Joe Jurevicius
- DJ Hackett
- Ben Obomanu
- Brandon Stokely
- NFCCG Hero and Almost Super Bowl MVP Chris Matthews

red rover red rover
Jun 7, 2002

Dude should be in the hall just for almost tearing some linebackers head off and just yeeting the helmet

Durandal1707
Oct 11, 2013

Quiet Feet posted:

I don't know anything about him but for some reason any player with -sky in their name always sticks in my head.

He was a run stuffing d-lineman for the Chargers and the Cowboys (I think he was also with Miami for a cup of coffee) for most of the 2000s. Solid player, fun name.

elime anning
Nov 19, 2002

Morbid Hound

No Butt Stuff posted:

Chris Conley

Chris Cooley walked so Chris Conley could run

fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret
Fred Smoot :whatup:

Hamhandler
Aug 9, 2008

[I want to] shit in your fucking mouth. [I'm going to] slap your fucking mouth. [I'm going to] slap your real mother across the face [laughter]. Fuck you, you're still a rookie. I'll kill you.
I think about big fat tight ends, and the football players too-

Brandon Manumaluena


Hell yeah a 300lb. H-Back

Eric Beverly:


A converted center playing tight end, this is good to me.



LaQuan McGowan never caught on, which is very upsetting to me because I wanted to see a 6'7" 340 pound tight end

Bird in a Blender
Nov 17, 2005

It's amazing what they can do with computers these days.

I have recently started replaying NFL Blitz on my N64 with my kid, so I'll start mining that for some football guys of the mid 90s.

Black Lighter
Sep 6, 2010

Just keep looking at what we're doing, keep watering and ask yourselves first and know 'Are you watering? And are you fertilizing every day?' So when it's time to pop, it'll pop.
Dorsey Levens

Insertnamehere31
Jan 23, 2012

This could be the most one-sided fight since 1973 when Ali faced an eighty-foot tall mechanical Joe Frazier. My memory isn't what it used to be, but I think the entire Earth was destroyed.

John Runyan
Correll Buckhalter
LJ Smith
Sheldon Brown
Koy Detmer

I played way too much madden when I was a kid, so I became very very familiar with the eagles roster from like 2002-2006

fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret
Chad May
Rhett Bomar
Rick Strom

Alaois
Feb 7, 2012

Dameyune Craig

Guido Merkens
Jun 18, 2003

The price of greatness is responsibility.
Bill Bates
Jason Sehorn

Guido Merkens fucked around with this message at 21:56 on Feb 13, 2024

Rogue Elephant
May 1, 2007

Braylon Edwards

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elime anning
Nov 19, 2002

Morbid Hound
Marques Tuiasosopo.

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