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redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Like a place under the floor where you stash 1000$ cash and your passport and that ancient family heirloom.

Or a fake book in the library, you pull it out and its got a gun and a Scotland Yard GPS

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Grey Cat
Jun 3, 2023

Doing stuff and things


Yeah, the secret tub full of sex toys.

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Grey Cat posted:

Yeah, the secret tub full of sex toys.

How hidden is it?

dsf
Jul 1, 2004
i used to keep weed in the secret weed compartment in the back of my PS2

Grey Cat
Jun 3, 2023

Doing stuff and things


redshirt posted:

How hidden is it?

It's hidden behind all the hanging flanels like a closet to narnia adult remake.

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag
Nice try redshirt

Fighting Elegy
Jan 2, 2007
I do not masturbate; I FIGHT!
I keep my spices in a secret spice rack

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die
Nap Ghost
no, no secret stashes at all so don't bother looking

Nooner
Mar 26, 2011

AN A+ OPSTER (:
I keep my gun in the night stand next to my bed, round chambered, safety always off

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Like one of those cool spaces under the basement floor. Under a rug, and then you've got to lift a secret panel or some such...

Haptical Sales Slut
Mar 15, 2010

Age 18 to 49

Nooner posted:

I keep my gun in the night stand next to my bed, round chambered, safety always off

Same. Mine dont have a safety :q:

naem
May 29, 2011

BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:

Nice try redshirt

satanic splash-back
Jan 28, 2009

I keep my buried treasure secure using only the highest quality parchment paper treasure maps and coded clues.

Grey Cat
Jun 3, 2023

Doing stuff and things


redshirt posted:

Like one of those cool spaces under the basement floor. Under a rug, and then you've got to lift a secret panel or some such...

We have one of those, it leads to a maybe chest high crawl space that runs under the entire house. Great for pretending to be a demon under the floor.

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

I'm just curious in general, not like "rob you" location specific, geez! I've just been thinking of having such a spot and wondering what might work best.

bvj191jgl7bBsqF5m
Apr 16, 2017

Í̝̰ ͓̯̖̫̹̯̤A҉m̺̩͝ ͇̬A̡̮̞̠͚͉̱̫ K̶e͓ǵ.̻̱̪͖̹̟̕
i hide messages to the whereabouts of my seceret treasure in my posts

guess you could say all my posts are gold

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

bvj191jgl7bBsqF5m posted:

i hide messages to the whereabouts of my seceret treasure in my posts

guess you could say all my posts are gold

Like how for example?

SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001

Hey Hey Let's Go! 喧嘩する
大切な物を protect my balls


redshirt posted:

How hidden is it?

Hidden in their rear end, so nobody will ever find it.

Grey Cat
Jun 3, 2023

Doing stuff and things


SLICK GOKU BABY posted:

Hidden in their rear end, so nobody will ever find it.

:hmmyes:

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Like if you pull Beethoven's head the false door opens

Bushmaori
Mar 8, 2009
i had a shoebox with heirlooms and every small sentimental trinket important to me
when i went overseas for a year and a half i asked my mum to keep it somewhere safe for me
she put it somewhere 'safe' and now she cant remember where

Bad Purchase
Jun 17, 2019




no, im an adult

MrQwerty
Apr 15, 2003

absolutely, it just doesn't have anything in it because I'm almost 40 and weed is legal

wizard2
Apr 4, 2022

Bushmaori posted:

i had a shoebox with heirlooms and every small sentimental trinket important to me
when i went overseas for a year and a half i asked my mum to keep it somewhere safe for me
she put it somewhere 'safe' and now she cant remember where

that's how it goes, you know?

Charles Bukowski
Aug 26, 2003

Taskmaster 2023 Second Place Winner

Grimey Drawer
Yes, I have a hollow book on my bookshelf that contains a little cash in 3 currencies, some drugs, and my death certificate.

ChubbyChecker
Mar 25, 2018

redshirt posted:

I'm just curious in general, not like "rob you" location specific, geez! I've just been thinking of having such a spot and wondering what might work best.

natures pocket

Revins
Nov 2, 2007





tune the FM in to static and pretend that its the sea
I keep my weedstuff in the sock drawer minus the bong which is kept in my closet

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag
Yeah I just keep poo poo in my nightstand. Weed, cock rings, expired condoms etc

Wifi Toilet
Oct 1, 2004

Toilet Rascal
No, my house was built in the 21st-century. All the cool secret hidden nooks and crannies in houses have been eliminated by modern homebuilders to save a few bucks.

Like, imagine building a floor with floorboards these days with space under the floor instead of just throwing plywood over a concrete slab and throwing carpet on it.

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

I have some older codes I keep locked in a fake Dr Seuss book

Internetjack
Sep 15, 2007

oh god how did this get here i am not good with computers
Top Cop
I don't have one myself. My grandparents had a secret room in their 3 story Victorian home that was built by my great-grandfather. It was legend among my cousins, but no one ever found it. One Thanksgiving my family and a cousin's arrived a few days early before the big get-together. My brother, cousin and I made it our mission to find the secret room. We searched that place top to bottom, searched the barn, the chicken coop, the orange grove, etc, dodging the adults the whole time.

We finally found it. It was in the cellar behind a bookcase. Nothing fancy, just had to move a 400 lb bookcase a few feet. And there it was, a doorway cut into the cement foundation of the building; and it was padlocked. gently caress. We spent half the day discretely searching/stealing the house for any keys. We couldn't find any that fit. We came to the totally sane conclusion that we would hacksaw the lock off; and we did. Only took us about 2 hours. Bloody knuckles and all that. I being the youngest was set to watch the staircase in case any adults decided to come down.

Inside was a bit disappointing to be honest. There were guns. Rifles and shotguns a good 100 years old. There were a couple of cases of moonshine from the prohibition era; most likely poisonous, and some silverware and china that I learned later was worth a good $10,000.

So of course we grabbed the guns and went to the adjacent room in the basement where all the cousins would hang out. So three teenagers playing with guns. Luckily there was no ammo.

And then we got busted. Dad came down wondering what we were doing all day and we were sitting there with half a dozen antique rifles. Dad made us fess up to our grandmother and she was only miffed that we had hacksawed the antique lock. "You could have just ask me how to get in..." I felt her disappointment in us strongly. (It turns out the key was only fifteen feet away under the staircase).

We replaced the lock with a new one; put the new key where the old one was; but then as the rest of the family/cousins showed up over the next couple of days we had supreme bragging right that we had discovered the secret room! We were strutting.

Nigmaetcetera
Nov 17, 2004

borkborkborkmorkmorkmork-gabbalooins
All my precious things are on display so that when the day arrives and the bad men finally come for me, they can rob me more easily.

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Internetjack posted:

I don't have one myself. My grandparents had a secret room in their 3 story Victorian home that was built by my great-grandfather. It was legend among my cousins, but no one ever found it. One Thanksgiving my family and a cousin's arrived a few days early before the big get-together. My brother, cousin and I made it our mission to find the secret room. We searched that place top to bottom, searched the barn, the chicken coop, the orange grove, etc, dodging the adults the whole time.

We finally found it. It was in the cellar behind a bookcase. Nothing fancy, just had to move a 400 lb bookcase a few feet. And there it was, a doorway cut into the cement foundation of the building; and it was padlocked. gently caress. We spent half the day discretely searching/stealing the house for any keys. We couldn't find any that fit. We came to the totally sane conclusion that we would hacksaw the lock off; and we did. Only took us about 2 hours. Bloody knuckles and all that. I being the youngest was set to watch the staircase in case any adults decided to come down.

Inside was a bit disappointing to be honest. There were guns. Rifles and shotguns a good 100 years old. There were a couple of cases of moonshine from the prohibition era; most likely poisonous, and some silverware and china that I learned later was worth a good $10,000.

So of course we grabbed the guns and went to the adjacent room in the basement where all the cousins would hang out. So three teenagers playing with guns. Luckily there was no ammo.

And then we got busted. Dad came down wondering what we were doing all day and we were sitting there with half a dozen antique rifles. Dad made us fess up to our grandmother and she was only miffed that we had hacksawed the antique lock. "You could have just ask me how to get in..." I felt her disappointment in us strongly. (It turns out the key was only fifteen feet away under the staircase).

We replaced the lock with a new one; put the new key where the old one was; but then as the rest of the family/cousins showed up over the next couple of days we had supreme bragging right that we had discovered the secret room! We were strutting.

Nice. Where is this secret stash today?

Toxic Mental
Jun 1, 2019

When I was young my family lived in the far outskirts of the city near some heavily forested hills, and me and a bunch of kids from the neighborhood found a old box in the woods filled with porno mags. We took them and hid them up in an old chicken coop in another part of the woods. We thought we were supremely cool.

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Toxic Mental posted:

When I was young my family lived in the far outskirts of the city near some heavily forested hills, and me and a bunch of kids from the neighborhood found a old box in the woods filled with porno mags. We took them and hid them up in an old chicken coop in another part of the woods. We thought we were supremely cool.

Ah, forest porn

Henry Lee Mucus
Dec 11, 2003

I dont believe in secret stashes because the very moment anyone steps a toe on my property Im just wantonly blasting, but aside from that I do keep an assortment of childhood baubles in my rear end in a top hat

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

Henry Lee Mucus posted:

I dont believe in secret stashes because the very moment anyone steps a toe on my property Im just wantonly blasting, but aside from that I do keep an assortment of childhood baubles in my rear end in a top hat

What if you were off in albany on business??

The Moon Monster
Dec 30, 2005

I have a gigantic electrical engineering reference book from the 60s with a thousand or so in cash hidden among the pages.

redshirt
Aug 11, 2007

I have a sacred rock

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Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
Untold riches in $20s and vital documents cleverly hidden under a pile of dildos

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