Terrible Car Stuff - Im sorry but in this thread we measure cargo capacity in shrimp

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Terrible Car Stuff - Im sorry but in this thread we measure cargo capacity in shrimp

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The Midniter: Jul 9, 2001

Oh well. I personally find flame paint jobs abhorrent.

Except for this one:

# ? Sep 18, 2013 16:51

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# ? May 12, 2024 08:20

Snowdens Secret: Dec 29, 2008; Someone got you a obnoxiously racist av.

The Midniter posted:

Gastonia Chrysler? You could've at least got a photo angle with the Peach in the background.

# ? Sep 18, 2013 17:03

DropShadow: Apr 15, 2003

Well done, sure, but those "realistic" flames just don't look good on anything to me. I'd rather see more like these:

Edit:

The Midniter posted:

Oh well. I personally find flame paint jobs abhorrent.

Except for this one:

I found a couple other angles of that one:

# ? Sep 18, 2013 17:04

Kill-9: Aug 2, 2004; You've got the cutest little baby face...

Linedance posted:

This is the most offensive vehicle I have ever seen.

Someone paid real money for that to be built. And someone took their money and built it. They should both be ashamed.

# ? Sep 18, 2013 17:16

Code Jockey: Jan 24, 2006; 69420 basic bytes free

Well, on the one hand, if it's built well, then that's fairly impressive craftsmanship.

On the other hand, it's a loving PT Cruiser. Why on earth would you use that as a donor/base?

e. Does it even have the guts to carry all that extra weight around?

# ? Sep 18, 2013 17:21

rscott: Dec 10, 2009

That poo poo isn't even American so they don't have an excuse that way either. Surely there had to be some better donor car in Europe than that.

# ? Sep 18, 2013 17:31

Paul Boz_: Dec 21, 2003; Sin City

rscott posted:

That poo poo isn't even American so they don't have an excuse that way either. Surely there had to be some better donor car in Europe than that.

I think that if anything this just reaffirms the utter worthlessness for the PT cruiser globally. It's reviled by every culture.

# ? Sep 18, 2013 17:33

CRUSTY MINGE: Mar 30, 2011; Peggy Hill
Foot Connoisseur

Paul Boz_ posted:

I think that if anything this just reaffirms the utter worthlessness for the PT cruiser globally. It's reviled by every culture.

gently caress are you talking about, every old fart out there that bought one new off a dealership loves them and drives around pretending it's the good ol' days of yesteryear when drinking and driving was encouraged and seatbelts were some new fancy thingamajig on one of dem yourapeein cars. they just want to roll around with their fake woodies (that's all they give their wives anyhow) listening to whatever beach music was popular in the movies of their childhoods.

or they're a masochist.

and these people exist across all spectrums of american culture.

E: you'll see, some lovely manufacturer will recreate some popular car from your childhood (who are we kidding, chrysler, because they'll somehow still exist) and you'll be on the downhill slope of senility when you find yourself seriously contemplating whether or not you should set your money on fire now in the living room while watching wheel of fortune or take it to the dealer and let them do it for you.

CRUSTY MINGE fucked around with this message at 17:47 on Sep 18, 2013

# ? Sep 18, 2013 17:43

veedubfreak: Apr 2, 2005; by Smythe

LITERALLY SHAKING posted:

E: you'll see, some lovely manufacturer will recreate some popular car from your childhood (who are we kidding, chrysler, because they'll somehow still exist) and you'll be on the downhill slope of senility when you find yourself seriously contemplating whether or not you should set your money on fire now in the living room while watching wheel of fortune or take it to the dealer and let them do it for you.

Nooooooope. I wouldn't be caught dead in a new beetle.

# ? Sep 18, 2013 17:51

CRUSTY MINGE: Mar 30, 2011; Peggy Hill
Foot Connoisseur

the situation implies you're old and crazy. you use an internet forum, you're not old. like ancient old, not mid-50s spinster old.

# ? Sep 18, 2013 18:54

MrChips: Jun 10, 2005; FLIGHT SAFETY TIP: Fatties out first

Linedance posted:

This is the most offensive vehicle I have ever seen.

Hey look it's a Poopmobile

# ? Sep 18, 2013 21:20

IOwnCalculus: Apr 2, 2003

Hazy night, right?

Except it was crystal clear, other than that one intersection, which also reeked of the rather unmistakable odor of burnt rubber. I could see the haze from this (literally) from a mile away approaching it, and by the time I drove through it I could see a similar cloud of tire smoke another mile down the road.

It may be stupid and borderline terrible, but someone definitely has some guts generating Top Fuel levels of tiresmoke on the street.

# ? Sep 18, 2013 22:18

Huggable Bear King: Jan 12, 2006; H.B.K.

The Midniter posted:

This was parked outside of a McDonalds next to the gas station where I was filling up. It had a dealer plate and as I was about to take the picture, the owner/drive walked out of McDonalds. It was a ~19 year old black kid in athletic shorts and a tank top. It boggled my mind why he was driving something like this with a dealer plate - my brother opined that perhaps he worked at a dealership and went on a fast food run for them, but he came out of McDonalds empty-handed.

When I asked him if I could take a picture of his car, he broadly smiled and stepped out of the frame, thinking I was doing so in admiration. Good times.

I wonder if that's actually paint or a vinyl wrap

# ? Sep 18, 2013 22:46

falz: Jan 29, 2005; 01100110 01100001 01101100 01111010

Disgruntled Bovine posted:

Speaking of terrible cars, about what year did Hyundai go from being a bad idea to a good value?

2001?

# ? Sep 18, 2013 23:08

Maker Of Shoes: Sep 4, 2006; AWWWW YISSSSSSSSSS
DIS IS MAH JAM!!!!!!

IOwnCalculus posted:

Hazy night, right?

Except it was crystal clear, other than that one intersection, which also reeked of the rather unmistakable odor of burnt rubber. I could see the haze from this (literally) from a mile away approaching it, and by the time I drove through it I could see a similar cloud of tire smoke another mile down the road.

It may be stupid and borderline terrible, but someone definitely has some guts generating Top Fuel levels of tiresmoke on the street.

I think it's still DUI taskforce week in the valley so most LEO's are all bunched up near booze hotspots.

# ? Sep 18, 2013 23:51

anonumos: Jul 14, 2005; Fuck it.

falz posted:

2001?

My 2010 Elantra is nothing to write home about (plastic motor, plastic transmission, plastic brakes, plastic everything).

But, I did drive a 2013 while having my engine replaced under warranty and THAT'S like driving a very good Honda. It was cushy, responsive, and yet grounded to the road. It had strong AC, a good entertainment package, and nice seats. It was, overall, a very good car.

I've also heard very good things from a coworker about her brand new Veloster.

I don't know. I'd say some models had good value almost a decade ago (Elantra GT). Others, like my own Elantra sedan, have only improved in the last year or so. Then, there's the newer stuff like Genesis that are top of their class. I've even heard good things about the latest Sonatas.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 00:01

Das Volk: Nov 19, 2002; by Cyrano4747

IOwnCalculus posted:

Hazy night, right?

Except it was crystal clear, other than that one intersection, which also reeked of the rather unmistakable odor of burnt rubber. I could see the haze from this (literally) from a mile away approaching it, and by the time I drove through it I could see a similar cloud of tire smoke another mile down the road.

It may be stupid and borderline terrible, but someone definitely has some guts generating Top Fuel levels of tiresmoke on the street.

Good way to dispose of tires that are heatcycled to the point of being harder than concrete.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 00:41

babyeatingpsychopath: Oct 28, 2000; Forum Veteran

I saw a car VERY similar to that recently, except the front surround is all primer gray. Looked like some killer flames, then they ding the front fiberglass and replace it and don't even paint it black or anything.

Classy. If I see it again when it's not bucketing rain I'll get some pix.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 00:52

Kenny Rogers: Sep 7, 2007; Chapter One:
When I first saw Sparky, he reminded me of my favorite comb. He was missing a lot of teeth.

Oh, Colorado...

This was in the parking lot at DEN as I was leaving work.
Now, it's legal here, so I totally get advertising your (newly legalized) business.

But why BISMUTH PINK?

Also, Lady Liberty with a fat blunt? Classy. As. gently caress.

LITERALLY SHAKING posted:

gently caress are you talking about, every old fart out there that bought one new off a dealership loves them and drives around pretending it's the good ol' days of yesteryear when drinking and driving was encouraged and seatbelts were some new fancy thingamajig on one of dem yourapeein cars. they just want to roll around with their fake woodies (that's all they give their wives anyhow) listening to whatever beach music was popular in the movies of their childhoods.

or they're a masochist.

and these people exist across all spectrums of american culture.

E: you'll see, some lovely manufacturer will recreate some popular car from your childhood (who are we kidding, chrysler, because they'll somehow still exist) and you'll be on the downhill slope of senility when you find yourself seriously contemplating whether or not you should set your money on fire now in the living room while watching wheel of fortune or take it to the dealer and let them do it for you.

I always thought that the Prowler was built for someone my dad's generation.
Very loosely based on my dad, this only-semi-fictional fella was born in '36, had his first car in the early 50's. Probably something left over from pre-war. Into the fledgling hot rod scene through the fifties and into the 60's. He maybe owned (or definitely wanted) a T-bucket for a short time in the mid 60's after seeing the original on 77 Sunset Strip. Then marriage came along with a child in the late 60's, and the cars of his youth were given up for something more practical, like a Rambler wagon, then an AMC Hornet. Then more kids came along in the early 70's, and so did a career selling cars. The Jeeps he brought home with dealer plates were pretty awful for carrying kids around, so he bought his wife a '71 Cutlass Supreme Convertible. drat fine car (that she still owns today, on her 70th birthday), but hardly 'sporting' with 125 horsepower from that 350 Oldsmobile "Rocket" V-8, the very life having been choked out of it with California Smog equipment. The 80s brought to the driveway next to the Cutlass a series of admittedly terrible, but undeniably practical minivans that he despises with every fiber of his gearhead heart - which is glad the Cutlass is still there. It scratches his 'car' itch as he rebuilds it twice as the Cutlass racks up 250,000+ miles, 6500 or so miles/year at a time.

Finally, 1996 rolls around, and the last of his kids takes flight into a post-college life of her own.

THE VERY NEXT YEAR Chrysler Corp rolls out the Plymouth Prowler. He goes out and buys one. Now, he's 60 years old, and doesn't have the joints he had when he was but a lad, so the fact that you can only get one with an automatic transmission seems like a fair compromise for him. The fact that it has a reputation for 'lackluster' performance is OK for him, too. His reflexes are slower, and something that goes like stink would probably see him wrapped around a pole someplace more sooner than later. It's still faster than those old souped up junkers he had as a kid, and (can you believe it!) this is brand new off the lot, with a warranty and all that gets you.
He hangs on to it for 5 years or so, then sells it to some other fella in his late 50's, and spends the remainder of his retirement in a nice, comfortable, sedate Camry that (still!) has more bells and whistles than any other car he's ever owned. The car guy dies plenty happy.

Kenny Rogers fucked around with this message at 02:53 on Sep 19, 2013

# ? Sep 19, 2013 01:35

Carteret: Nov 10, 2012

anonumos posted:

My 2010 Elantra is nothing to write home about (plastic motor, plastic transmission, plastic brakes, plastic everything).

But, I did drive a 2013 while having my engine replaced under warranty and THAT'S like driving a very good Honda. It was cushy, responsive, and yet grounded to the road. It had strong AC, a good entertainment package, and nice seats. It was, overall, a very good car.

I've also heard very good things from a coworker about her brand new Veloster.

I don't know. I'd say some models had good value almost a decade ago (Elantra GT). Others, like my own Elantra sedan, have only improved in the last year or so. Then, there's the newer stuff like Genesis that are top of their class. I've even heard good things about the latest Sonatas.

I love my 2011 Genesis Coupe.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 01:53

aventari: Mar 20, 2001; I SWIFTLY PENETRATED YOUR MOMS MEAT TACO WHILE AGGRESSIVELY FONDLING THE UNDERSIDE OF YOUR DADS HAIRY BALLSACK, THEN RIPPED HIS SAUSAGE OFF AND RAMMED IT INTO YOUR MOMS TAILPIPE. I JIZZED FURIOUSLY, DEEP IN YOUR MOMS MEATY BURGER WHILE THRUSTING A ANSA MUFFLER UP MY GREASY TAILHOLE

Huggable Bear King posted:

I wonder if that's actually paint or a vinyl wrap

Yes it's a wrap.

I was very confused at the people hear mentioning it was a 'good flame job'

# ? Sep 19, 2013 07:20

Octopus Magic: Dec 19, 2003; I HATE EVERYTHING THAT YOU LIKE* AND I NEED TO BE SURE YOU ALL KNOW THAT EVERY TIME I POST

*unless it's a DSM in which case we cool ^_^

Hyundai started to get good when Mitsubishi decided that banking all their marketing efforts behind 2 Fast 2 Furious was a really good idea.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 15:59

Maker Of Shoes: Sep 4, 2006; AWWWW YISSSSSSSSSS
DIS IS MAH JAM!!!!!!

Octopus Magic posted:

Hyundai started to get good when Mitsubishi decided that banking all their marketing efforts behind 2 Fast 2 Furious was a really good idea.

Mitsubishi was crumbling long before 2F2F.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 16:41

Octopus Magic: Dec 19, 2003; I HATE EVERYTHING THAT YOU LIKE* AND I NEED TO BE SURE YOU ALL KNOW THAT EVERY TIME I POST

*unless it's a DSM in which case we cool ^_^

Maker Of Shoes posted:

Mitsubishi was crumbling long before 2F2F.

Eh, 2002/2003 is a good year of when the whole zero down thing and much of their lineup (Galant/Montero/Diamante) becoming completely irrelevant

# ? Sep 19, 2013 16:45

Cruseydr: May 18, 2010; I am not an atomic playboy.

This is a real prowler:

# ? Sep 19, 2013 17:02

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Cruseydr posted:

This is a real prowler:

At first glance I thought it had psoriasis.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 17:43

CommieGIR: Aug 22, 2006; The blue glow is a feature, not a bug; Pillbug

Cruseydr posted:

This is a real prowler:

A cheetah....rabbit.....okay.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 18:04

The King of Swag: Nov 10, 2005; To escape the closure,
is to become the God of Swag.

That poor Rabbit; why couldn't they gently caress up* a car that isn't hard to find in good condition?

* I don't care what anyone says, vinyl wraps leave all sorts of nasty poo poo on the car when you pull them off. Wrapping an entire car means it may need a complete chassis strip and sand-blasting to ever get clean enough to put real paint on it.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 22:09

Finger Prince: Jan 5, 2007

The King of Swag posted:

That poor Rabbit; why couldn't they gently caress up* a car that isn't hard to find in good condition?

* I don't care what anyone says, vinyl wraps leave all sorts of nasty poo poo on the car when you pull them off. Wrapping an entire car means it may need a complete chassis strip and sand-blasting to ever get clean enough to put real paint on it.

It's a loving vw rabbit. The vinyl wrap is probably the only thing holding the rust together.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 22:18

The King of Swag: Nov 10, 2005; To escape the closure,
is to become the God of Swag.

It's Washington, one of the states with as little rust as California.

Edit: I've owned/own VWs of that vintage; rust isn't an issue if you stay out of the rust belt.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 22:22

CommieGIR: Aug 22, 2006; The blue glow is a feature, not a bug; Pillbug

The King of Swag posted:

It's Washington, one of the states with as little rust as California.

Edit: I've owned/own VWs of that vintage; rust isn't an issue if you stay out of the rust belt.

Your in AI, if its a VAG product its condemned on sight.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 22:24

IOwnCalculus: Apr 2, 2003

Linedance posted:

It's a loving vw rabbit.

No, this is a loving rabbit.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 22:25

CommieGIR: Aug 22, 2006; The blue glow is a feature, not a bug; Pillbug

IOwnCalculus posted:

No, this is a loving rabbit.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A4vT63ZAJE0

Its a Polo, but hey...

# ? Sep 19, 2013 22:26

Kenny Rogers: Sep 7, 2007; Chapter One:
When I first saw Sparky, he reminded me of my favorite comb. He was missing a lot of teeth.

CommieGIR posted:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A4vT63ZAJE0

Its a Polo, but hey...

I disagree.

...and X gets the square.

# ? Sep 19, 2013 23:02

aventari: Mar 20, 2001; I SWIFTLY PENETRATED YOUR MOMS MEAT TACO WHILE AGGRESSIVELY FONDLING THE UNDERSIDE OF YOUR DADS HAIRY BALLSACK, THEN RIPPED HIS SAUSAGE OFF AND RAMMED IT INTO YOUR MOMS TAILPIPE. I JIZZED FURIOUSLY, DEEP IN YOUR MOMS MEATY BURGER WHILE THRUSTING A ANSA MUFFLER UP MY GREASY TAILHOLE

IOwnCalculus posted:

No, this is a loving rabbit.

the bunny anus is a nice touch

# ? Sep 20, 2013 00:35

babyeatingpsychopath: Oct 28, 2000; Forum Veteran

aventari posted:

the bunny anus is a nice touch

And cotton balls.

# ? Sep 20, 2013 01:47

Toucan Sam: Sep 2, 2000

aventari posted:

Yes it's a wrap.

I was very confused at the people hear mentioning it was a 'good flame job'

It's similar to what Mike Lavallee does at Killer Paint. I like Mike's stuff a lot.

# ? Sep 20, 2013 04:18

Bajaha: Apr 1, 2011; BajaHAHAHA.

Truck Nuts had scrape marks because they were hanging so low to the ground. Not sure what spiderman is doing hanging off the side there.

# ? Sep 20, 2013 04:47

General_Failure: Apr 17, 2005

Bajaha posted:

Not sure what spiderman is doing hanging off the side there.

Whatever a spider can. Duh.

# ? Sep 20, 2013 05:39

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# ? May 12, 2024 08:20

Mr-Spain: Aug 27, 2003; Bullshit... you can be mine.

Fucknag posted:

Actually I always thought the FD RX7 looked like a baby Corvette:

Although to be fair the FD was first, so maybe more accurate to say the Vette is a giant RX?

Old post but:

code:

Vette:
Wheelbase	104.5 in (2,654 mm)
Length	        179.7 in (4,564 mm)
Width	        73.6 in (1,869 mm)
Height	        47.7 in (1,212 mm)

FD:
Wheelbase	95.5 in (2,426 mm)
Length	        168.5 in (4,280 mm)
Width	        68.9 in (1,750 mm)
Height	        48.4 in (1,229 mm)

About a foot longer, 4 inches wider, and give or take and inch lower. Pretty close.

# ? Sep 20, 2013 05:46

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Terrible Car Stuff - Im sorry but in this thread we measure cargo capacity in shrimp

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