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Jared592 posted:Outcast Spy, just for the sake of experimentation, can you try a day without any coffee and report back? I found that taking stimulants upon stimulants worsened the withdrawal anxiety when they wear off, so I'm curious if cutting out the coffee would lessen the anxiety. I'm thinking of doing that very thing. Only problem is I may have to decrease the caffeine slowly rather than cut it outright, because I get withdrawal headaches that set in a few hours after I should have had my coffee, and they last for days and don't respond to pain meds. Since I don't suffer if I miss a single dose of Wellbutrin I might see if that's a confounding variable, too. Come to think of it, I went off caffeine entirely for several months in a row a couple years ago, but I can't remember if that coincided with the time I was also off Wellbutrin. (I went off *that* for a year or so because it did something strange to my sense of taste, but my taste never recovered so I got back on it since I didn't want to constantly wish I were dead!) I had headaches pretty much the entire time I was awake during the first month or so when I had no caffeine, although to be fair I was only awake during work hours. I slept as soon as I got home. For weeks. Quite an adventure. But I've never been caffeine free during my foray into ADD-specific prescription stimulants so it's worth a test run.
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Oct 8, 2013 22:06
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I found that being caffeine free is easy on the stims. Also, that both licorice tea and Roobios tea are delicious, and provide a nice afternoon beverage without the need for speed. 
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Oct 8, 2013 22:34
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Zhentar posted:Because you aren't! It's not that clear-cut; unfortunately there's nothing definitive about diagnosing ADD. Thanks for the advice. Of course, for objective evidence, there's an EEG/brain imaging test that was approved by the FDA a few months ago. But then again, money. 150mg bupropion kickstarted my heart a little to much, so last week I switched to IR generic ritalin. The fabled "light switch" is there. I'm getting 4 hours of solid effects sandwiched between an hour of comeup and comedown that isn't as nice, but still better than baseline. I'm not experiencing the rebound effects that others talk about - maybe the 75mg bupropion I'm still taking helps with that. Ritalin kills the hyperactive poo poo for me, brings focus and reduces distractions mostly under perception, and more importantly enables switching focus, but isn't so much help for impulsiveness. I feel mellow enough to fall asleep if I wanted to, but able to get going on that huge chunk of life that is "things you don't want to do." I hope it keeps working without side effects when the dose titrates up.
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Oct 8, 2013 23:36
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I've been taking Ritalin every single day for the last four or five months. I took my first day off last week because I wanted to see what it felt like. I didn't feel much different than usual. Is it fair to assume that there is a compounded effect from taking it every day? I feel a lot more focused and have a lot more energy over all, even in the mornings before I take my dose. In fact, I usually feel motivated enough throughout the mornings that I don't bother taking my pill until the early afternoon, which is when I usually start to feel tired and lazy. Do most people take breaks?
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Oct 9, 2013 02:25
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I was recently diagnosed with ADHD (the inattentive type) and started Motiron yesterday (I think it's a cheaper version of Ritalin). I've started on a small dosage, something like 5 mg three times a day and even with the small amounts, it makes me somewhat dizzy/drowsy. It's not too bad and I can function normally, but it's a really weird feeling. I'm getting a bit worried since I am following a schedule where I have to increase the dose every 3 days, so I'm wondering if it'll get worse. Has anyone else experienced something like this?
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Oct 9, 2013 16:22
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My first stim med was generic amphetamine salts, which made me tired as hell. I would get home from work, slog through whatever needed done, and then hit the hay. Now that I'm on Vyvanse, I notice I no longer have this problem, and am ready and willing to do normal day to day stuff. I also drink as much coffee as I used to, about six to ten cups a day. I do jitter a lot, of course, but nothing that I find concerning.
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Oct 9, 2013 17:43
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Outcast Spy posted:I'm not sure what I'd be willing to replace it with, given my experiences with the ten or so other antidepressants I've tried in the last fifteen years, how sick they made me. But maybe the doctor has an idea, or there's something new out there. You could try just Vyvanse. For some people, stimulants are more effective at treating depression than antidepressants are.
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Oct 9, 2013 22:33
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Marv Albert posted:Thanks for the advice. Of course, for objective evidence, there's an EEG/brain imaging test that was approved by the FDA a few months ago. But then again, money. They only approved it for children, and even then, it's still not black and white.
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Oct 9, 2013 22:38
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After close to two years of behavorial therapies with different kind of specialists, greatly improved lifestyle(food, sleep, workout) and no significant results other than toning down my anger issues,they finally decided to send me to a psychiatrist. What should I expect really? I'm pretty nervous about it that I'm afraid I will forget everything when he/she asked me questions. I thought of writing some sort of bios of myself from childhood right up until now. Or is that too  ?
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Oct 17, 2013 15:27
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Frog 1.0 posted:After close to two years of behavorial therapies with different kind of specialists, greatly improved lifestyle(food, sleep, workout) and no significant results other than toning down my anger issues,they finally decided to send me to a psychiatrist. In my experience, you should expect that someone is going to know little about you and then give you drugs. Your on going sessions will consist of How have you been feeling? /not listening much/ Okay lets try this. Pay co-pay. We call them Dr. Feelgood for a reason.
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Oct 17, 2013 15:40
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Frog 1.0 posted:After close to two years of behavorial therapies with different kind of specialists, greatly improved lifestyle(food, sleep, workout) and no significant results other than toning down my anger issues,they finally decided to send me to a psychiatrist. This is one area where spergin' is kind of warranted, because even if you are severely ADHD, you have an uphill battle from the get go as a never-diagnosed adult. Like you, de-stressing my life significantly, treating depression, eating like a naturophile athlete, kicking heavy drinking, improving my sleep 100%, and getting back in to excellent physical shape helped a lot of things, but didn't do jack poo poo for ADHD issues. Whether you get an open-ended interview or one tailored to assessing for ADHD probably depends on your referral. I was referred by my psychiatrist, specifically for ADHD assessment, to a clinical psychologist who did a 30-minute interview, an IVA+ computer test and a followup 5-minute parental-interview. 2 weeks later the psychologist's report mentioned things like "severely impaired" and "ADHD-combined type." I think going off of notes might make a bad impression upon the shrink in question. I considered using notes, but abandoned the idea because how likely are we to make detailed and comprehensive reports about anything? Instead, I just lead the discussion off the cuff about how ADHD-like symptoms have had a pervasive effect on my life for decades, answered questions truthfully, even potentially incriminating ones, and had a diplomatic attitude. Keep in mind that the shrink wants to help, but making a differential diagnosis of ADHD is hard if there is anything else comorbid going on, and there are assholes who don't need ADHD meds out there scamming scripts for them. Marv Albert fucked around with this message at 07:01 on Oct 18, 2013 |
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Oct 18, 2013 06:57
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Marv Albert posted:This is one area where spergin' is kind of warranted, because even if you are severely ADHD, you have an uphill battle from the get go as a never-diagnosed adult. Like you, de-stressing my life significantly, treating depression, eating like a naturophile athlete, kicking heavy drinking, improving my sleep 100%, and getting back in to excellent physical shape helped a lot of things, but didn't do jack poo poo for ADHD issues. Yeah. I would say at least 50% of the people shrinks see for "ADHD" are just scamming meds. Go in, be yourself, be honest, tell the doctor how you've changed your life for the better in myriad ways but you still just can't pay attention or motivate complex thought a lot of the time.
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Oct 19, 2013 18:44
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I cut my caffeine by half for a week and am now reducing it to only a third of the total coffee grounds, which I'll do for another week. I haven't noticed any major changes, just small things, like the Vyvanse isn't quite so effective, but neither is it quite as anxiety-provoking (although that aspect of it is still pretty evident). I had one mysterious night of complete insomnia and wasn't even tired the next day, and then slept a good portion of the weekend, ten- to twelve-hour stretches. (Seven hours is my norm.) O how I wish the Vyvanse would help a little better. That brief feeling that things can be accomplished, that I am not stupid or lazy, that I get occasionally when I take it. I just need it to last long enough to forestall the overwhelming nature of searching for a new job or applying to a graduate school or wondering if either of those things would be really terrible choices. One odd and funny side effect of the medication is that I tend to buy things I've needed for a long time, because I feel less guilty about trying to justify them. So far I don't think I've bought anything frivolous, but I do need to reign it in either way. It's just a little common sense voice in my head asking me "do you really want to look like a hobo at work? Here are some stylish pants and flattering tops for you to select from. Buy them now while they're still on sale. No, no, STAY AWAY FROM THE BOOTS."
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Oct 21, 2013 01:40
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I had the same thing happen on Lamictal + Ritalin. I don't know if it was because: I finally had both the attention span, and the self esteem, to do research into the things I wanted to buy - and then buy them. Or because: the combo of drugs loosened my inhibition. One example is that I finally I broke down an bought a Kindle in March. Now, I'm kicking myself for not getting one earlier, I love it so. But, until March, looking at all the different makes and models on Amazon just paralyzed me. (EInk wifi/3G with a physical keyboard 4 lyfe.) It's settled down quite a bit, and I've adjusted to it. I never did anything frivolous with it, either. I think you'll adjust to this as well.
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Oct 21, 2013 02:50
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I think the buying inhibition, at least for me, is because I felt so scattered normally that I didn't want to make a bad decision in that state of mind. When you feel "together", it's much easier to see a rational decision through the disarray of choices.
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Oct 21, 2013 15:50
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I take literally years to make certain purchase decisions - my smartphone in particular took two years because, like with the newer Kindles, there are so many options. I never before attributed it to any kind of attention deficit, but it certainly was a hallmark of being overwhelmed. Fortunately when I bought my Kindle there were only one or two models. And I also feel that it is one of the best purchases I have ever made. Books have always been something I forgive myself for impulse-buying, so it works out. And reading is one of the things I can do for hours without getting distracted or angry at being overwhelmed. Reading is brain-balm.
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Oct 21, 2013 18:24
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Jared592 posted:I think the buying inhibition, at least for me, is because I felt so scattered normally that I didn't want to make a bad decision in that state of mind. When you feel "together", it's much easier to see a rational decision through the disarray of choices. This is a big reason why I would procrastinate for weeks on <$100 purchases if there are many alternatives available. The weeks and weeks would be spent doing sporadic 5-10 minutes blocks of research on the purchase until I just decided to say gently caress it and stop overthinking things - or just impulse-buy one of the possible choices. I also totally get avoiding spending money in that certain things just aren't on your radar, and if the thought that maybe you should buy some things pops into your head, it's gone just as fast if you don't promptly write the thought down on a list or go shopping right then and there. Over the years, I adapted towards acting on all sorts of thoughts in this manner, because if I don't, I know I am going to forget to do the thing just as fast as the thought came in to my head. While meds help me stop procrastinating and make good choices on buying things I really want or need, they also help me not spend money impulsively on things I don't. I really like going shopping and spending money impulsively when bored, and the novelty of New Thing is a potent allure while it lasts.
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Oct 21, 2013 22:59
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After 20 years of self-loathing for being monstrously lazy and unmotivated (and my parents worrying where they went wrong with me compared to my more successful brother younger brother), this thread got me to talk to my GP about some of my issues and he suspected it might be ADHD (H for hypo-active) so he printed me a referral to...no one in particular, because he didn't know who deals in ADHD in adults in this city. Oh well. Time to do my own research and phone around. My brother used to be really bad in school and my parents were always badgering him about how I was doing much better. But I never did put in any effort, I was just smart enough to coast along in elementary, then in highschool I got really really average because I could only will myself to put in the minimum of effort while my brother actually did real work and got better than me. Now he's a productive member of society and I'm a mess 
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Oct 24, 2013 11:13
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Psykmoe posted:After 20 years of self-loathing for being monstrously lazy and unmotivated (and my parents worrying where they went wrong with me compared to my more successful brother younger brother), this thread got me to talk to my GP about some of my issues and he suspected it might be ADHD (H for hypo-active) so he printed me a referral to...no one in particular, because he didn't know who deals in ADHD in adults in this city. Oh well. Time to do my own research and phone around. Sounds textbook. Start callin.
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Oct 24, 2013 16:54
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If there's such a thing as an ADHD flare-up, holy poo poo I have that. My meds have stopped working, now adderall just makes me "up" and I have no loving clue what to do anymore. This blows. If anyone wants a rundown of what ADHD is, here's loving textbook poo poo- I currently am in a masters program, and I'm taking 2 classes. For my business telecom class, I just last night finished a powerpoint presentation I needed to do that I took maybe 30 minutes to make, and I should've been working on this for at least a week. I am going to look like I'm winging it, basically because I am. I still have an article writeup I need to do. It'll take me 20 minutes, tops. I just can't loving do it. I had a midterm last week for my information security class. I did the midterm the day it was due, when it was open book/open note and had been available since the first day of the class. I missed a quiz because I didn't realize we weren't skipping a week of quiz just because the midterm was upon us. I haven't read the textbook for either of these classes more than a couple of times. This is more than just "I'll cram for it, it'll be fine." I'm just not doing poo poo. I'm staring at work that I know needs to be done. It's constantly on my mind, but the motivation to actually start working on them is just out of reach. It feels like there's a bigass wall I have to mount to get to the other side where the work is. It's like I'm searching desperately for my motivation but someone's put vaseline all over my glasses. It just feels like something is getting in the loving way. I know there's nothing stopping me from working, but instead of working I'm writing this post. Instead of working I'm just doing anything BUT working, as hard as I can. The reality that the task at hand is no more difficult than it appears is killing me. It's like I have been given a puzzle called "starting" that I can't figure out, and I'm not allowed to work until the puzzle is solved, but I see everyone else ignoring the puzzle and walking straight on towards finishing their work. 
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Oct 29, 2013 17:22
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signalnoise posted:I'm just not doing poo poo. I'm staring at work that I know needs to be done. It's constantly on my mind, but the motivation to actually start working on them is just out of reach. It feels like there's a bigass wall I have to mount to get to the other side where the work is. It's like I'm searching desperately for my motivation but someone's put vaseline all over my glasses. It just feels like something is getting in the loving way. I know there's nothing stopping me from working, but instead of working I'm writing this post. Instead of working I'm just doing anything BUT working, as hard as I can. The reality that the task at hand is no more difficult than it appears is killing me. It's like I have been given a puzzle called "starting" that I can't figure out, and I'm not allowed to work until the puzzle is solved, but I see everyone else ignoring the puzzle and walking straight on towards finishing their work. When I was in college attending classes felt like this for me. In one particular class, I missed a bunch of sessions, got threatened by the teacher that I better not miss another one, was determined to go to that next class and there was just a block. I was all packed up and dressed and couldn't physically make myself step out the door to actually go. And then I had a mini breakdown because I felt like I had absolutely no control - my brain was screaming at me to do something and I couldn't actually do it. I even yelled aloud at myself F-ING GO TO CLASS NOW, NOW!!! and punched a couch cushion over and over again like some kind of psychopath. It was kind of a turning point of sorts for me - I was approaching graduation and was terrified that I wouldn't ever be able to hold down a job with my lack of impulse control. My background is similar to a lot with ADHD: above-average intelligence but incredibly scatterbrained, too wild to sit down for long periods of time, amazing ability to lose and forget things, can't hold attention on anything. I was diagnosed with ADHD in second grade, and it has really been a loong struggle. I am on varying dosages of Adderall, which works great for helping me to pay attention to things but makes me aloof and overly intense sometimes. Also, I have a lot of trouble switching focuses from one thing to another and feel furiously angry when my work is interrupted for any reason. I cannot handle boredom at ALL. When not on Adderall, I am usually in this weird daze, feel frustrated cuz I can't concentrate on anything or get anything done and have trouble with some acquaintances because I can't focus long enough to hold a conversation and often forget names and faces. Also, I am acutely aware that if I did not have my Adderall I would be an alcoholic. With that said, after graduation I picked up an organization system that really helps me - I literally call it my "life changing plan" and that is what my friends and family know it as. I have tried almost every organization system known to mankind and nothing until this has worked. This new system has seriously changed my life for the better, so I wanted to spread it along here in case it helps anyone else like it helped me with work/school. Sorry if this is getting long, I can do a tl:dr thing at the bottom. Anyway, I read the book "Getting Things Done" by David Allen during my first job out of college when I was struggling to organize all my tasks/responsibilities at work. In it he talks about an organization system GTD, why/how it works and walks you through the steps of setting up the system on your own. I recommend getting the book, mine is falling apart I have used it so many times over the years. I have kept with this system for more than 5 years now, and while I still have plenty of ADHD issues, this system has helped. Now, instead of needing a good dosage of my adderall every single day in order to complete tasks, I am so organized that I am able to go up to 3 days in a row without Adderall sometimes and not have everything completely fall apart! I started typing a description of the system but it was waaayyy too long to explain when I'm not sure if anyone cares to hear about it. So if anyone is interested in hearing more about GTD and what works with it let me know and I can type it up here. In short, the three things that helped me most are: separate lists of next actions and projects, tickler file, weekly review. Seriously, look up how to use a tickler file if you are struggling to remember future tasks at work. It has made a huge difference for me. And the concept of "next actions" vs. projects seems so simple, yet it really has helped me to not procrastinate as much and to actually complete tasks when I don't have medicine to help me. With it, I have also managed to avoid frustrating "blocks" along the lines of what signalnoise described above. TLDR: I have severe ADHD and picked up the GTD organization system, which, while not perfect, significantly improved my life - if anyone wants any advice on it I'd be happy to give!
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Oct 29, 2013 21:48
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prefect posted:I can only describe what I did; it may not be a good idea at all. For me a quiet space was too boring, I would just be really frustrated and bored and antsy to actually do homework. This may sound a little nutty, but what I used to do is listen to music and bounce a tennis ball off the wall - we had an unfinished basement that I could run around in and bounce the ball off the wall, and I would study things down there and then my mom would come down and do something like quiz me in spelling while I was bouncing the tennis ball. If I had to write something or do problems, I would bounce the tennis ball while thinking about it, and then run over and write down answers as they came to me. I think the point made earlier about how it takes double the energy for the ADHDer to focus is a good one - because I was running around and bouncing the ball, I was already energized and "up" - somehow that made doing the thinking required to do work easier. I actually still pace around and throw things in the air when I am really thinking hard about something or especially if I am writing. If I am just sitting in the chair looking at a piece of paper in front of me the thought of actually sitting there and writing is torture. I need to be moving. Another suggestion: maybe you could break down the homework into more manageable tasks. Complete two math problems from this page and you get to watch TV now for X amount of time, before going back to the homework, for instance. A lot of ADHDers have problems with immediate gratification v. delayed rewards. Of course that could make the homework take longer, but if it already takes her multiple hours and with temper tantrums this could be a good strategy. Maybe a list where every two problems she can watch the TV or do something fun for a limited amount of time. What has ended up happening with me at least when I break down tasks like that is that the roadblock to doing the work is gone - the torture only lasts two minutes and then I get to do something fun ASAP! And sometimes what ends up happening is I get into a rhythm of doing the work and if its easy just end up finishing the whole thing in one sitting. Just a suggestion, I don't know much about homework and not sure if breaking it up like that is feasible in this circumstance.
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Oct 29, 2013 22:18
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signalnoise posted:This is more than just "I'll cram for it, it'll be fine." I'm just not doing poo poo. I'm staring at work that I know needs to be done. It's constantly on my mind, but the motivation to actually start working on them is just out of reach. It feels like there's a bigass wall I have to mount to get to the other side where the work is. It's like I'm searching desperately for my motivation but someone's put vaseline all over my glasses. It just feels like something is getting in the loving way. I know there's nothing stopping me from working, but instead of working I'm writing this post. Instead of working I'm just doing anything BUT working, as hard as I can. The reality that the task at hand is no more difficult than it appears is killing me. It's like I have been given a puzzle called "starting" that I can't figure out, and I'm not allowed to work until the puzzle is solved, but I see everyone else ignoring the puzzle and walking straight on towards finishing their work. This is exactly what I experience, probably a good 60% of the time. I will spend all day thinking about work, planning to work, worrying about work, feeling overwhelmed, but never starting because there is a mental block there, and I just. can't. Ritalin helps but doesn't completely solve the problem. I'll just convince myself that something else really needs to get done instead and I'll channel my motivation into that (cleaning my room instead of starting a project, etc.) Re: Getting Things Done... I agree that it's an awesome organizational system. This site teaches you how to integrate the system into Evernote.
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Oct 29, 2013 22:57
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I recommend listening to Adam Corolla's pod cast with Dr. Drew Pinsky. I don't think Drew has bead on adult ADHD, but Adam said a few things (ad nauseum) that really straightened out my year.
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Oct 30, 2013 00:24
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I'm finding it difficult to gather my thoughts so please bear with me. I'm wondering if you guys think I have it or.. what. -As a kid, I was abused, quite severely and had no real way to know if there was something wrong with me, because nobody cared. I never did homework, I would always lose it, or "lose it", and get in trouble. My desk, my locker, my room, my bag was constantly in a mess. Impacted papers from the beginning of the year, things I couldn't even get through. I was screamed at and hit for it, my desk was dumped by the teacher. -I would never do homework. As a very young child, I would always "overthink" questions because I had no idea questions based on readings had anything to do with the readings, so I would construct motivations of characters based off how I felt they should have been thinking, rather than the information given to me in the text. -I had extreme difficulty paying attention in class. As soon as I would sit down, and the teacher began talking, within a sentence or a phrase, my mind would just... blank out. I would feel numb and weird and then just draw in my margins instead of taking notes. I quit college because I tried to kill myself, and haven't gone back because I'm a loving failure who will flunk out immediately and waste money. -In high school I would chug caffeine, a red bull in the morning, a jolt through the day, another red bull at lunch and another after school, just to be able to TRY to do think. I never did my homework unless it was clear that it was absolutely necessary to pass the class. The caffeine only barely helped and I think it just felt dirty and weird. -I CANNOT loving FOCUS. To the point where, every time I try to do things I like, like making music, or drawing, or writing, I just start doing it for 1-2 minutes, and my mind just.. goes. It switches off. On the other hand, there are times when I just zone in on something and just... not let go of it for a very long time. But this is really rare nowadays. I never finish anything and I'm never happy with the vanishingly small things I have managed to finish. -I cannot talk to people. Even friends. I have tried to do things like make eye contact, or watch the person's lips, but as soon as they begin talking for a while, I absolutely can't keep up. It almost feels like I can't even hear what they're saying, even though I can, technically, but it just does not get through. And the worst part is that while my brain is shut off, I end up staring at the speaker while my mind is blank, I'm expected to respond, and I haven't been paying attention, so I just don't know what to say, and I say all this stupid poo poo based on what I thought they said. Sometimes when someone starts to talk to me out of nowhere I can just hear... nothing, or something similar to the charlie brown adult sounds, it doesnt register as speech to me until I focus all my energy into hearing what they say. I make a lot of stupid loving mistakes that I feel I could have avoided if I was "with it" If someone is talking about something important, I still can't even focus long enough to be able to follow what they're saying. I just drift out. Something in my mind just closes right the gently caress off and it's so upsetting and frustrating it makes me cry. When I was in college I couldn't loving focus either, I would just doodle in the margins and I never, ever studied. Never. I get annoyed for basically no loving reason sometimes. Just snappy and irritable. I have a tendency to talk over people and I feel like all my thoughts are swirling around so fast that it's like trying to catch a slippery fish in the river with greased hands. The only thoughts I can express are ones I manage to grab, and they're so disjointed and but a few phrases I procrastinate so much it should be illegal and I buy poo poo even though I feel like I could use it it's not worthless the things I buy but I just keep doing it without thinking I should perhaps save for it or something, I just go ahead and buy it just because I want it. At a restauant if I'm given a menu I hold up the entire table because I just keep looking at everything, over and over and over and I can't decide what it is I want, then I blank out and lose what it is I wanted in the first place, and I can feel the atmosphere at the table get annoyed because of my idiot bullshit. Back and forth and back and loving forth through the menu because I feel like I'm in such a fog that I can't focus on actually ordering Ive felt this way for as long as I can remember and I was just hit/beaten for not paying attention or not doing homework or doing badly in school. I have never passed as single math class since the 8th grade. I coasted on everything else, somehow I'm actually loving crying because I see so much of this in me and I'm terrified that I can't get help, that the psychiatrist I'm supposed to see on Monday will think I'm out to score pills or something and refuse to give me something that would actually work. I have anxiety and suicidal depression Do you think I have some kind of deficit disorder? I tried to bring this up to my mother but she said it was bullshit and just a child thing, because im not hyper or whatever. I'm quite the opposite, I'm unmotivated and I feel numb and empty, unable to even loving read because I can't read past a paragraph or so. I'm basically a lazy piece of poo poo and I never do anything. Smoking cigarettes seems to help my thoughts sort of calm down and re-form themselves (for all of 10 minutes I guess) but I'd rather not smoke if I can help it Basically I will never get help with any of the things in my mind and I'd rather kill myself as soon as I can. I suspect that I have ADHD Inattentive but I don't even know if it loving matters at this point if I cant get actual help. I'd rather die than keep this up anymore. My loving brain is like when you get a pen on paper and just scribble as hard as you possibly can and are expected to be able to read anything from it. I cant even do things I thought I liked to do. Please please help me. Please I dont even know what to tell the psychiatrist. Im so lost. nishi koichi fucked around with this message at 11:06 on Nov 1, 2013 |
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Nov 1, 2013 10:32
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bad posts ahead!!! posted:I dont even know what to tell the psychiatrist. Im so lost. Just read them your post. Seriously.
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Nov 1, 2013 11:35
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On top of all the poo poo I mentioned there, I also get these loops just constantly like a phrase or a thought repeated over and over like someone just ctrl +c and ctrl +v'd it and held the button down and it's impossible to break out of the loop, and it's usually something telling me to hurt myself, or how big of a piece of poo poo i am, which i dont deny but i wish it would just loving stop looping like this
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Nov 1, 2013 12:08
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bad posts ahead!!! posted:On top of all the poo poo I mentioned there, I also get these loops just constantly like a phrase or a thought repeated over and over like someone just ctrl +c and ctrl +v'd it and held the button down and it's impossible to break out of the loop, and it's usually something telling me to hurt myself, or how big of a piece of poo poo i am, which i dont deny but i wish it would just loving stop looping like this Welcome to my life! I don't have the "hurting myself" part but the "you're loving up your life" part happens all the time. Go exercise, like really loving aggressively, for 45+ min. It'll fix it, I promise you. Oh and you probably have ADHD but on top of anxiety and depression so you'll need to get those sorted out first - just be honest with the doc, I guarantee you they've heard crazier poo poo before.
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Nov 1, 2013 13:35
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bad posts ahead!!! posted:On top of all the poo poo I mentioned there, I also get these loops just constantly like a phrase or a thought repeated over and over like someone just ctrl +c and ctrl +v'd it and held the button down and it's impossible to break out of the loop, and it's usually something telling me to hurt myself, or how big of a piece of poo poo i am, which i dont deny but i wish it would just loving stop looping like this Like wilfredmerriweathr said, looping is classic ADD, but the content of said loops sounds like you're depressed (these often co-occur, often times someone is depressed because of their untreated ADD messing up their life). You need to see a psychiatrist, and medication should definitely be augmented with therapy. I used have the exact same symptoms as you, and while medication helped me to slow down and focus, it is only with the therapy that I could really be consciously able to stop think self-destructive thoughts. I still get loops a lot, either something I am stressed/worried about, or really stupid song loops (like way worse than the normal "song got stuck in your head" stuff), but the self destructive thoughts rare now. Exercise (especially something aerobic and repetitive like running or biking) always helps me out. Sometimes meditation does too.
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Nov 1, 2013 13:56
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Yeah it isnt only the depressive poo poo that gets looped, it can be anything, phrases, songs (more than just getting a song in your head, it's really hosed up and obsessive) other thoughts that just do not fuckin go away. I guess I'll go tot he shrink and see how hosed I am
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Nov 1, 2013 14:11
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bad posts ahead!!! posted:Yeah it isnt only the depressive poo poo that gets looped, it can be anything, phrases, songs (more than just getting a song in your head, it's really hosed up and obsessive) other thoughts that just do not fuckin go away. I guess I'll go tot he shrink and see how hosed I am The looping thing is just how humans are built. We all get earworms. Ride a bicycle, listen to classical music.
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Nov 1, 2013 15:36
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if that actually worked for me i wouldnt be here but thank you i appreciate it for real
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Nov 1, 2013 19:01
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bad posts ahead!!! posted:if that actually worked for me i wouldnt be here but thank you i appreciate it for real Something I have come to understand with the looping issue, for ME, is that really it's like there's an audio track always on in my brain. Like, if you were to consider visual daydreaming to be the video track, I have a purely audio track that's constantly on. Something MUST be occupying my attention in terms of sound. If my audio attention is not being taken by something external, then a piece of a song or something will start echoing in my mind. Acknowledging this, if I feel like it's getting to be too much, I put on some kind of audio that will occupy my mind. This can be a conversation, or an audiobook, or some other kind of verbal stimulus that I'm actively interested in. Not just some kind of music, but something that I must pay specific attention to that is audio in nature that I also give a poo poo about. Lately, it's been the Delivered From Distraction audiobook. If I don't want to be focusing on stuff, the only other option is loud music. I literally put music on that is so loud I cannot hear myself think. Usually this requires headphones. Don't make it so loud you're hurting your ears though, just loud enough to drown out your mind. My favorite song for this, because of its droning pattern, is Dam That River by Alice in Chains. I could seriously listen to that song (not paying attention to it) for hours. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ITxP1evF2A signalnoise fucked around with this message at 19:40 on Nov 1, 2013 |
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Nov 1, 2013 19:37
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I feel like im thinking so loving much and it's going so fast that it's like i'm not thinking of anything at all. It's all a blur and I cant grab hold of it. I cried like a fuckin baby when I picked up a book and realized I couldn't get past the first few sentences
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Nov 1, 2013 19:56
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sejoonki posted:Anyway, I read the book "Getting Things Done" by David Allen during my first job out of college when I was struggling to organize all my tasks/responsibilities at work. In it he talks about an organization system GTD, why/how it works and walks you through the steps of setting up the system on your own. I recommend getting the book, mine is falling apart I have used it so many times over the years. I have kept with this system for more than 5 years now, and while I still have plenty of ADHD issues, this system has helped. Now, instead of needing a good dosage of my adderall every single day in order to complete tasks, I am so organized that I am able to go up to 3 days in a row without Adderall sometimes and not have everything completely fall apart! I also have to recommend reading GTD if you're having problems with organization at work. Remembering things is one of my biggest challenges, and I know that if something isn't written down its going to be forgotten. I've had a life long problem with organization. I remember frequently staying behind after school an extra hour to clean out my locker because it was overflowing with papers. My room growing up, and now my apartment have always been a mess. GTD has been really helpful at work since it gives me structure to collect alot of stray thoughts and get them into one place. It's weird because I read so many things in this thread that makes me go "wow that's absolutely me," I but also have some contradictory evidence that makes me second guess going in and getting diagnosed. For example, I frequently zone out when people are talking to me, even if it's a boss relaying important information that I really want to listen to and comprehend. Other times I can be a great listener, and people enjoy talking to me because of it. Some other things I've done include noticing that I had lost my pen on my uniform. No problem, I had an extra pack of pens in my car (because I'm losing them so often.) Get in the car, drive somewhere, get out, and when I need to write something down, realize I forgot to grab a new pen. Repeat all day long. Another time I drove to a convenience store, got some stuff, and then I walked back to my apartment, only to do a panic dance the next morning when I didn't see my car in its parking spot. Hey bad posts, I hope you can get an appointment soon and they can get you some help! Things can and will get better!
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Nov 1, 2013 20:23
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Found out that I can't get adderall in belgium. That was probably the last med I could have tried. Everything else failed badly.
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Nov 2, 2013 00:05
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mrfart posted:Found out that I can't get adderall in belgium. Oh, wow - I'm so sorry. Is it something where the health plan won't cover it, or it's not physically available anywhere in the country? Is it even possible to try to go to a neighboring country to try to (legally) get it?
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Nov 4, 2013 01:13
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Did you try Dexedrine? Or maybe vyvanse if its available? I know some European countries only allow methylphenidate prescriptions, but there are others that allow dextroamphetamine but not adderall. Actually after doing some reading, it appears that you have "epipropane" available which is amphetamine sulfate (ie adderall) combined with... Phenobarbital?! This is kind of insane because in the us they stopped mixing barbituates with amphetamines decades ago. However, if you haven't tried it, you should, as it is basically adderall... wilfredmerriweathr fucked around with this message at 02:42 on Nov 4, 2013 |
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Nov 4, 2013 02:28
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Appointment tomorrow. Nervous as gently caress. I'm bringing a less profanity-laced version of what I posted above and I'm scared I still won't get help.
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Nov 4, 2013 05:56
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bad posts ahead!!! posted:Appointment tomorrow. Nervous as gently caress. I'm bringing a less profanity-laced version of what I posted above and I'm scared I still won't get help. Unfortunately, ADHD diagnosis being what it is, the burden of proof is on you and you could have an uphill battle. Your post hints that ADHD-like symptoms are causing a pervasive impairment across multiple areas of your life. If you can effectively communicate that idea to your doctor, one way or another, and have parents and/or other close people who can corroborate a pattern of ADHD-like symptoms going back to childhood and lasting through the years, you shouldn't be so nervous. The worst thing that can happen is that you need to get a second (or third) opinion if you truly believe it's ADHD. I was like you and quite worried and demoralized that, given knowledge of myself, and with ADHD being the best explanation for the decades of pervasive impairments and wreckage in my life, my doctor wouldn't buy the ADHD hypothesis. I think if one is truly suffering from ADHD, and any comorbidities are explainable as secondary, that has a way of being noticeable by a professional and serving as evidence of the condition in its own right. Marv Albert fucked around with this message at 09:02 on Nov 4, 2013 |
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Nov 4, 2013 08:56
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