RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

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babies havin rabies: Feb 24, 2006

RadicalR posted:

All of these years of computers and somehow I still get my mind blown. I have never known that Alt codes existed.

I'm bad at this, aren't I?

Clearly you never had a high school Spanish teacher who demanded typed homework with proper accents. ��

# ? Jan 31, 2014 15:46

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# ? May 15, 2024 23:11

Gunjin: Apr 27, 2004; Om nom nom

Question about the C-40, on the MXPs you could use the remote control to "take the floor", which worked great for how some of our clients conducted their meetings, but gently caress if I can find a way to do the same thing with the C-40s, is there even a way? In a perfect world I'd just talk to the Cisco rep, we've got a few questions that we haven't been able to get answered, but only some middle manager is allowed to talk to them and he can't be bothered to get off his rear end to do anything.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 15:50

Powerful Two-Hander: Mar 10, 2004; Mods please change my name to "Tooter Skeleton" TIA.

rolleyes posted:

If your RDMS is sane then SQL keywords are reserved and can't be used as field names. Even Oracle manages to enforce this so I'd be surprised if the others didn't.

Mssql will let you do it with at least some words as long as you enclose the table name in square brackets when querying.

I know this because a former developer created a table named "file" and a column named "end" which was annoying.

Actually for table names I think if you use the full path e.g. dbo.file it will work but just file won't.

Edit: "where" is a stupid name for a column anyway even if it is allowed.

Powerful Two-Hander fucked around with this message at 15:56 on Jan 31, 2014

# ? Jan 31, 2014 15:53

Toxteth OGrady: May 28, 2013

Collateral Damage posted:

Reply that they can use Alt-032 to enter a space and close the ticket.

Ha! I would, but I'll be nice seeing as she sent us a mildly amusing email email instead of the usual :supaburn:

# ? Jan 31, 2014 15:57

AlternateAccount: Apr 25, 2005; FYGM

Nemo2342 posted:

Sounds like eTime. Only works with some version of Java 6, and the further from it you get the worse it works. At least my company lets you 1) use swipe cards or 2) call a 1-800 number or 3) log in to eTime and clock in.

Yeeeeep, eTime.

Now, we've been using eTime for a while but it was tied into a card swiper, so it was easy. This new poo poo is just terrible.

This is where I gave up and told the new company they would have to get someone that knew this poo poo involved.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 15:58

myron cope: Apr 21, 2009

Seriously, do people have positive experiences with Java at all?

# ? Jan 31, 2014 16:12

KweezNArt: Jul 30, 2007

myron cope posted:

Seriously, do people have positive experiences with Java at all?

I uninstalled it once. That was nice.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 16:16

AlternateAccount: Apr 25, 2005; FYGM

Ah yes, our product requires you to download and install Java, which has bundled ad/malware. gently caress that.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 16:18

RadicalR: Jan 20, 2008; "Businessmen are the symbol of a free society
---
the symbol of America."

AlternateAccount posted:

Ah yes, our product requires you to download and install Java, which has bundled ad/malware. gently caress that.

I think they stopped bundling stuff now. Baby steps!

# ? Jan 31, 2014 16:23

Lum: Aug 13, 2003

Caged posted:

Oh you poor misguided fool, SmartNet inexplicably doesn't exist for this product. The only way you can get ongoing support is to have one of our VARs come onsite and do it for you. In exchange for sacks full of cash they will ignore your calls and act as though your custom is irritating to them.

Showed my girlfriend the MoneyShovel stuff as she's the networks person in this house. Her response...

Don't forget that the moneyshovel 7945 is only licensed for 12.2.54(WTF)5 ~~revenue~~ release stream, and to get the features you want from 15.3.1(BBQ)1 you have to relicense it.

Or you can just hexedit a 12.2.54(WTF) image released for the 8645 so it will run on the 7945 because the only difference is two bytes and the front panel is silver.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 16:35

blackswordca: Apr 25, 2010; Just 'cause you pour syrup on something doesn't make it pancakes!

So an email came in.

Contracted Web Developer posted:

Hey blackswordca. I setup apache subserver on <windows 7 development workstation>. I need you to redirect all incoming port 80 and 443 traffic to come to it.

Thanks

I don't think this will be happening WebDev..

# ? Jan 31, 2014 16:47

RadicalR: Jan 20, 2008; "Businessmen are the symbol of a free society
---
the symbol of America."

Lum posted:

Showed my girlfriend the MoneyShovel stuff as she's the networks person in this house. Her response...

Don't forget that the moneyshovel 7945 is only licensed for 12.2.54(WTF)5 ~~revenue~~ release stream, and to get the features you want from 15.3.1(BBQ)1 you have to relicense it.

Or you can just hexedit a 12.2.54(WTF) image released for the 8645 so it will run on the 7945 because the only difference is two bytes and the front panel is silver.

I laughed. Your girlfriend is awesome.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 16:54

Zero VGS: Aug 16, 2002; ASK ME ABOUT HOW HUMAN LIVES THAT MADE VIDEO GAME CONTROLLERS ARE WORTH MORE; Lipstick Apathy

myron cope posted:

Seriously, do people have positive experiences with Java at all?

My brother runs a jewelry store and someone pawned him a steel ring that had the Java logo on it and a transponder inside it, given out at some convention.

I put it up on eBay where two I'm-assuming-rich-rear end-java-devs proceeded to bid against each other and I sold the piece of poo poo for like $120. So positive experiences are possible.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 17:01

stevewm: May 10, 2005

myron cope posted:

Seriously, do people have positive experiences with Java at all?

I once deployed the "Uninstall Java" package from PDQDeploy to every computer in the company.

There where tears... of joy.

So yes, I did have a positive experience where Java was involved.

I am so glad we have zero use for Java.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 17:07

MJP: Jun 17, 2007; Are you looking at me Senpai?; Grimey Drawer

A SAN node failure came in (presented with minimal commentary)...

Wednesday, 2:15 AM: SAN node fails. Boss picks it up and hands it off to me when I wake up as he tries frantically to Xenmotion servers off of the affected node.
8:30 AM: I get in and call Lefthand support. They work on it and determine that both PSUs are dead - one went down in 2012 but nobody took any action on it, and the other one failed just now.
1 PM: two PSUs arrive on site.
2 PM: HP tech arrives on site, refuses to swap in PSUs because the SAN node is powered on. The fact that Lefthand support says we should replace the PSUs is dismissed by him out of hand. He power-cycles the node, forces it back into discovery, and the node comes back up.

Thursday, 9:15 PM: same node fails. I pick up the issue, call Lefthand support, they can't even ping it or ILO to it as they could before. I ask them to send the parts back out.
11:15 PM: Get the call from the field tech, I open the ticket with Internap to allow him and his backup techs into the colo facility.
1 AM: get woken up by a call that UPS is having trouble delivering the parts, I give them the Internap ticket number and they deliver.
4 AM: I wake up and realize that it's been three hours and I haven't heard from the techs. I call Lefthand support, they patch me through to the tech manager who patches me through to the tech. It's someone else other than the 11:15 call. She didn't even know that the parts were onsite. She says she'll be onsite by 6, I tell her to call me when she gets there.
7 AM: I get woken up by the tech calling in, asking if I knew where in the colo facility our rack was. I tell her I don't, and that she should check with the colo people.
7:15 AM: she calls to tell me she found someone but they brought her to the wrong place, they're taking her to the correct location. I turn on ID lights for the servers in the rack and that whichever one in that rack has no light is the one that's dead.
After she locates the rack, I proceed to reiterate a few times that the one server with no ID light in the rack full of servers with ID lights lit is the target.
8:00 AM: hearing nothing after she starts work at around 7:30, I call for an update. "Oh, I finished replacing the parts, but I had to move my car, so I haven't plugged it back in yet."
8:30 AM: no word back. A call from the dispatch manager comes in and I tell him why I asked him to call me - John Doe who opted not to swap the PSU in, and now Jane Vehicular Tetris Doe.
9:15 AM: The node comes back up. I call the tech, asking her to confirm what parts are replaced. "Sure, let me put you on speaker while I load them up." She puts me on speaker and doesn't respond to me going "Hello? Hello?" and such for five minutes. I hang up.
9:20 AM: tech calls me back, tells me what's been swapped, and that's that.

Good times!

# ? Jan 31, 2014 17:12

Powerful Two-Hander: Mar 10, 2004; Mods please change my name to "Tooter Skeleton" TIA.

Zero VGS posted:

My brother runs a jewelry store and someone pawned him a steel ring that had the Java logo on it and a transponder inside it, given out at some convention.

I put it up on eBay where two I'm-assuming-rich-rear end-java-devs proceeded to bid against each other and I sold the piece of poo poo for like $120. So positive experiences are possible.

Literally married to java.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 17:16

Pendent: Nov 16, 2011; The bonds of blood transcend all others.
But no blood runs stronger than that of Sanguinius; Grimey Drawer

myron cope posted:

Seriously, do people have positive experiences with Java at all?

We use Kronos and a Java based webapp for remote access. Kronos will only work on 6_31 and the remote access app generally wants 7_45 (but not 7_51). The only things I have to say about Java after the past week will be heavily laced with profanity.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 17:23

BabyFur Denny: Mar 18, 2003

rolleyes posted:

If your RDMS is sane then SQL keywords are reserved and can't be used as field names. Even Oracle manages to enforce this so I'd be surprised if the others didn't.

MySQL can do this:

code:

select
	`select`,
	`from`
FROM
	`where`
where
	`order by` = 'stupid'
order by
	`stupid`

# ? Jan 31, 2014 17:24

Collateral Damage: Jun 13, 2009

MJP posted:

Good times!

This is why I always just have HP send me the parts and swap them myself. No offence to their techs, but if I do it myself it'll be done faster and correctly.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 17:34

GreenNight: Feb 19, 2006; Turning the light on the darkest places, you and I know we got to face this now. We got to face this now.

Collateral Damage posted:

This is why I always just have HP send me the parts and swap them myself. No offence to their techs, but if I do it myself it'll be done faster and correctly.

I'll swap a hard drive but I'll be god damned if I'm swapping a motherboard or a screen. Who has time for that.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 17:36

FlapYoJacks: Feb 12, 2009

Pff, the MoneyShovel series is terrible and can be done with just a Gentoo box and a 23 year old kid with some Linux experience on a core2duo box with 6Nics. :smug:

Edit* In regaurds to time keeping, if any of you are in a position to actually upgrade or move away from the old lovely systems, a friend of mine owns and operates http://www.tsheets.com/ because he hated all of the other time sheet programs out there. It's pretty sweet for sure.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 17:38

AlternateAccount: Apr 25, 2005; FYGM

RadicalR posted:

I think they stopped bundling stuff now. Baby steps!

Naw, it still has the ask.com toolbar bullshit :\

# ? Jan 31, 2014 17:58

ConfusedUs: Feb 24, 2004; Bees?
You want fucking bees?
Here you go!
ROLL INITIATIVE!!

AlternateAccount posted:

Yeeeeep, eTime.

Now, we've been using eTime for a while but it was tied into a card swiper, so it was easy. This new poo poo is just terrible.

This is where I gave up and told the new company they would have to get someone that knew this poo poo involved.

Dumb question: but does the bit level of Java matter for this app?

Like does it require 64bit Java if you're on a 64bit machine?

# ? Jan 31, 2014 18:01

Collateral Damage: Jun 13, 2009

GreenNight posted:

I'll swap a hard drive but I'll be god damned if I'm swapping a motherboard or a screen. Who has time for that.

I don't do client devices. Those they can send a tech for. But anything in the data center I'll handle myself, thanks.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 18:02

EAT THE EGGS RICOLA: May 29, 2008

AlternateAccount posted:

Naw, it still has the ask.com toolbar bullshit :\

The offline installer doesn't.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 18:04

n0tqu1tesane: May 7, 2003; She was rubbing her ass all over my hands. They don't just do that for everyone.; Grimey Drawer

Gunjin posted:

Question about the C-40, on the MXPs you could use the remote control to "take the floor", which worked great for how some of our clients conducted their meetings, but gently caress if I can find a way to do the same thing with the C-40s, is there even a way? In a perfect world I'd just talk to the Cisco rep, we've got a few questions that we haven't been able to get answered, but only some middle manager is allowed to talk to them and he can't be bothered to get off his rear end to do anything.

Doesn't look like it's a supported feature if you're using the built-in multisite. https://supportforums.cisco.com/thread/2233111

# ? Jan 31, 2014 18:24

teethgrinder: Oct 9, 2002

AlternateAccount posted:

Yeeeeep, eTime.

Now, we've been using eTime for a while but it was tied into a card swiper, so it was easy. This new poo poo is just terrible.

This is where I gave up and told the new company they would have to get someone that knew this poo poo involved.

Please submit to thedailywtf.com

http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/Born-on-the-34th-of-Smarch-.aspx

# ? Jan 31, 2014 18:28

Gunjin: Apr 27, 2004; Om nom nom

n0tqu1tesane posted:

Doesn't look like it's a supported feature if you're using the built-in multisite. https://supportforums.cisco.com/thread/2233111

Well I guess that explains why I couldn't figure it out. Not sure why they'd remove that feature, it's pretty useful.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 18:36

n0tqu1tesane: May 7, 2003; She was rubbing her ass all over my hands. They don't just do that for everyone.; Grimey Drawer

The TC software is basically new software from the ground up. At least they kept the serial/telnet command API the same though.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 18:56

Flipperwaldt: Nov 11, 2011; Won't somebody think of the starving hamsters in China?

EAT THE EGGS RICOLA posted:

The offline installer doesn't.

Does using that one also prevent the updates from including one? Because that would be good to know.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 19:39

Agrikk: Oct 17, 2003; Take care with that! We have not fully ascertained its function, and the ticking is accelerating.

BabyFur Denny posted:

MySQL can do this:

code:

select
	`select`,
	`from`
FROM
	`where`
where
	`order by` = 'stupid'
order by
	`stupid`

This code and the MoneyShovel conversation have made me smile and giggle under my breath this morning. Thanks folks and Happy Friday!

# ? Jan 31, 2014 19:43

EAT THE EGGS RICOLA: May 29, 2008

Flipperwaldt posted:

Does using that one also prevent the updates from including one? Because that would be good to know.

no. disable the updates.

REG DELETE HKLM\SOFTWARE\WOW6432Node\Microsoft\Windows\CurrentVersion\Run /v SunJavaUpdateSched /f
REG DELETE "HKLM\SOFTWARE\Wow6432Node\JavaSoft\Java Update" /f

# ? Jan 31, 2014 19:53

Posting Principle: Dec 10, 2011; by Ralp

myron cope posted:

Seriously, do people have positive experiences with Java at all?

On the server, as a developer? Yes, definitely. In the browser, as a CJ... ?

# ? Jan 31, 2014 19:55

baquerd: Jul 2, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

skipdogg posted:

System Engineer then goes, Senior, Lead, Staff, Senior Staff, Principal etc.

It feels like Army ranks or something. We have Software Engineer, Senior, Lead, and Principal. Base/Senior is actual software engineering, and then Lead/Principal is architectural/client meetings all day long.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 20:31

FISHMANPET: Mar 3, 2007; Sweet 'N Sour
Can't
Melt
Steel Beams

ConfusedUs posted:

Dumb question: but does the bit level of Java matter for this app?

Like does it require 64bit Java if you're on a 64bit machine?

That looks like a browser window, so the bitness of Java has to match the bitness of the browser.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 20:34

dorkanoid: Dec 21, 2004

EAT THE EGGS RICOLA posted:

no. disable the updates.

REG DELETE HKLM\SOFTWARE\WOW6432Node\Microsoft\Windows\CurrentVersion\Run /v SunJavaUpdateSched /f
REG DELETE "HKLM\SOFTWARE\Wow6432Node\JavaSoft\Java Update" /f

or use the reg key to disable the ask question:

code:

Windows Registry Editor Version 5.00

[HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\JavaSoft]
"SPONSORS"="DISABLE"

[HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Wow6432Node\JavaSoft]
"SPONSORS"="DISABLE"

# ? Jan 31, 2014 20:37

Nemo2342: Nov 26, 2007; Have A Day; Nap Ghost

AlternateAccount posted:

Yeeeeep, eTime.

Now, we've been using eTime for a while but it was tied into a card swiper, so it was easy. This new poo poo is just terrible.

This is where I gave up and told the new company they would have to get someone that knew this poo poo involved.

My setup guide for the seasonal payroll admin is:

1) Uninstall Java
2) Go to the eTime site
3) Let eTime install whatever Java it wants

That was the only way to get it so that she could do anything more than clock herself in and out with it. I just have to cross my fingers that she won't need some other site that requires a later version of java.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 20:54

GoatShaver: Nov 12, 2010

Lum posted:

It still amazes me that there are IT people who don't immediately format and reinstall any prebuilt computer that comes their way.

Related: this program was sent my way by someone asking if it's any good. I've not used it but supposedly it will backup and restore Windows+Office activations so you don't even have to worry about having to phone microsoft or losing your OEM/SLIC based key. Anyone know if it's any good?

FWIW I use it fairly often and yeah, works pretty great.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 21:01

GoatShaver: Nov 12, 2010

Church groups are some of the most vile groups of people to deal with, when it comes to supporting events and technology. Rude, angry, expect the world, expect to not pay for it, and incredibly condescending.

# ? Jan 31, 2014 21:04

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# ? May 15, 2024 23:11

peak debt: Mar 11, 2001; b& :(; Nap Ghost

myron cope posted:

Seriously, do people have positive experiences with Java at all?

Back in 1998 I programmed in it a little and it was quite nice having a language that managed its memory allocations itself!

# ? Jan 31, 2014 21:20

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

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