Sochi 2014 Megathread 1: Grovergrad - OoOo* - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > Sochi 2014 Megathread 1: Grovergrad - OoOo*

«‹›205 »

doomisland: Oct 5, 2004

stuxracer posted:

Wait. The guy that designed this Spiderman broadway show is in charge of the opening ceremony?

Hahaha

I saw that before they redid the last act. It was really boring but they did love the wire poo poo.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:04

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 1, 2024 09:40

EvilTobaccoExec: Dec 22, 2003; Criminals are a superstitious, cowardly lot, so my disguise must be able to strike terror into their hearts!

stuxracer posted:

Wait. The guy that designed this Spiderman broadway show is in charge of the opening ceremony?

Hahaha

Which guy? I'm know its not Stan Lee or Bono. I can probably rule out the comic book writer RAS because lol, one of them is a lady, and theres that edge fellow but you wouldnt hire Bono's puppet.

Holy poo poo. STEVE DITKO WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:04

QuickbreathFinisher: Sep 28, 2008; by reading this post you have agreed to form a gay socialist micronation.
`

Why are all the Canadian figure skaters crosseyed?

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:04

Von Sloneker: Jul 6, 2009; as if all this was something more
than another footnote on a postcard from nowhere,
another chapter in the handbook for exercises in futility

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:05

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

Question is Pussy Riot actually good or is it mostly gently caress You Dad music?

I mean kudos to them for standing up for what they believe in but they are no Riot Grrl

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:05

crackton: May 9, 2009

t3h z0r posted:

Someone's gonna die.

how hasn't someone already

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:06

Sad Billionaire: Mar 31, 2009; What a twist; Fan of Britches

Alan Smithee posted:

Question is Pussy Riot actually good or is it mostly gently caress You Dad music?

I mean kudos to them for standing up for what they believe in but they are no Riot Grrl

It's real bad

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:06

Kilo147: Apr 14, 2007; You remind me of the boss
What boss?
The boss with the power
What power?
The power of voodoo
Who-doo?
You do.
Do what?
Remind me of the Boss.

crackton posted:

how hasn't someone already

Someone has. Torch bearer had a heart attack.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:07

you irl: Jan 22, 2014

Alan Smithee posted:

Question is Pussy Riot actually good or is it mostly gently caress You Dad music?

I mean kudos to them for standing up for what they believe in but they are no Riot Grrl

X-Ray Spex

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:07

Kilo147: Apr 14, 2007; You remind me of the boss
What boss?
The boss with the power
What power?
The power of voodoo
Who-doo?
You do.
Do what?
Remind me of the Boss.

Requesting a death count in thread title.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:07

Paradox Personified: Mar 15, 2010; SoroScrew

7thBatallion posted:

Requesting a death count in thread title.

Dogs: too many
People: Almost three but technically zero?

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:08

EXTREME INSERTION: Jun 4, 2011; by LadyAmbien

7thBatallion posted:

Someone has. Torch bearer had a heart attack.

Lol

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:08

EXTREME INSERTION: Jun 4, 2011; by LadyAmbien

I care about the dogs mostly

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:08

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

odds on terrorists being sexy lady queda?

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:09

QuickbreathFinisher: Sep 28, 2008; by reading this post you have agreed to form a gay socialist micronation.
`

The Something Awful Forums > Main > GBS 1.4 > Sochi 2014 Megathread- Days since workplace casualty: N/A?

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:09

Lawman 0: Aug 17, 2010

Alan Smithee posted:

Question is Pussy Riot actually good or is it mostly gently caress You Dad music?

I mean kudos to them for standing up for what they believe in but they are no Riot Grrl

its genuinely loving terrible music

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:09

America Inc.: Nov 22, 2013; I plan to live forever, of course, but barring that I'd settle for a couple thousand years. Even 500 would be pretty nice.

Whoever gets hurt in the most ridiculous fashion gets a gold medal.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:09

crackton: May 9, 2009

7thBatallion posted:

Someone has. Torch bearer had a heart attack.

I meant on that slope. I wasn't sure if you were serious about that but ha.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:10

etalian: Mar 20, 2006

UnnaturalSELECTION posted:

Lol

Also the Olympic torch went out multiple times on the journey and was also manufactured in Siberia

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:10

kindermord: Jun 5, 2003; ducks is chickens with swimmy toes

Alan Smithee posted:

Question is Pussy Riot actually good or is it mostly gently caress You Dad music?

it is literally jumping up and down naked on church altars while screaming obscenities and tumblresque catchphrases so it is as gently caress you dad as you can get

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:12

you irl: Jan 22, 2014

Negative Entropy posted:

Whoever gets hurt in the most ridiculous fashion gets a gold medal.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:12

bongwizzard: May 19, 2005; Then one day I meet a man,
He came to me and said,
"Hard work good and hard work fine,
but first take care of head"; Grimey Drawer

you irl posted:

X-Ray Spex

Yeah but they had charm. And a saxophone.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:12

America Inc.: Nov 22, 2013; I plan to live forever, of course, but barring that I'd settle for a couple thousand years. Even 500 would be pretty nice.

you irl posted:

If a dog eats them while they're injured I guess the dog could get the medal instead.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:15

Chard: Aug 24, 2010

We were Olympic contestants
Dogs are eating our intestines
Broke our knees skiing first day
Run away
Run away
Run far a-waaaay

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:16

QuickbreathFinisher: Sep 28, 2008; by reading this post you have agreed to form a gay socialist micronation.
`

HOT. COOL. YOURS. still sounds overwhelmingly like a slogan for menthol smokes to me.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:18

Orthodox Rabbit: Jun 2, 2006; This game is perfect for empty-headed dunces that don't like to think much!! Of course, I'm a genius... I wonder why I'm so good at it?!

All the medals this year are hollowed out flasks full of mystery liquid.

Bronze medals: mystery faucet brown water
Silver medals: mystery shower brown water
Gold medals: maybe gin, maybe vodka, maybe tarp runoff if you lucky!

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:19

zakharov: Nov 30, 2002; Tater Love

Alan Smithee posted:

Question is Pussy Riot actually good or is it mostly gently caress You Dad music?

I mean kudos to them for standing up for what they believe in but they are no Riot Grrl

Judge for yourself

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NrLI-5xYybo

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:19

al-azad: May 28, 2009

SickZip posted:

Their were stalls in my bootcamp barracks. Unfortunately only 3 stalls and 3 urinals for almost 100 in my platoon.

The instructors controlled when we could piss and would give us around a minute to do so, so I got real familiar with being jammed with 4-6 other marines in a stall while we all communally pissed. A delicate balance of not overtly meatgazing and not pissing on each other.

Finishing bootcamp without accidently touching another man's penis is one of my finest accomplishments. Not all of us made it.

I was Navy and we had stalls. And then 2 weeks in they removed the doors from the stalls as a social exercise. You're still showering with several dozen people at a time with all the water coming from a pillar with 6 spigots. And they gave you 5 minutes to shower. For everyone. Then they'd do PT after so you go to bed sweaty anyways.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:19

Cockblocktopus: Apr 18, 2009; Since the beginning of time, man has yearned to destroy the sun.

kindermord posted:

it is literally jumping up and down naked on church altars while screaming obscenities and tumblresque catchphrases so it is as gently caress you dad as you can get

That honestly makes the Putin overreaction as hilarious as it is. It's not like the people of Russia are going to lock arms singing Pussy Riot's greatest hits like the end of Les Mis; his regime threw a hissy fit over the least threatening thing possible.

Their main political competition is a Chess champion. Their other most outspoken critic is Scrooge McDuck. Russia is such a hilariously bleak place.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:20

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

SarutosZero posted:

All the medals this year are hollowed out flasks full of mystery liquid.

Bronze medals: mystery faucet brown water

Silver medals: mystery shower brown water

Gold medals: maybe gin, maybe vodka, maybe tarp runoff if you lucky!

That's not chocolate!

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:20

you irl: Jan 22, 2014

If you are maimed during the Olympics can you enter the Paralympics

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:21

Fat Lowtax: Nov 9, 2008; "I'm willing to pay up to $1200 for a big anime titty"

I can't wait until there's no terrorism but Russia brutally and publically murders a pretty Muslim girl who just wanted to watch the national hockey team

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:21

Internet Kraken: Apr 24, 2010; slightly amused

stuxracer posted:

Wait. The guy that designed this Spiderman broadway show is in charge of the opening ceremony?

Hahaha

I can only imagine what nightmare this guy cooked up without safety precautions to hold him back. Maybe someone will get decapitated by a spinning olympic ring.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:22

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

Anything good happen while i was gone?

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:27

teen witch: Oct 9, 2012

So t.A.T.u is going to play the opening ceremony.

http://www.billboard.com/articles/news/5900927/russian-pop-act-tatu-performing-at-sochi-olympics-opening-ceremony-report

The band thats best known for the lesbian make out rain song, is playing in Sochi. The opening ceremony. In Russia.

teen witch fucked around with this message at 05:30 on Feb 7, 2014

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:27

Big Ol Marsh Pussy: Jan 7, 2007

wow sochi

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:27

Photex: Apr 6, 2009

Internet Kraken posted:

I can only imagine what nightmare this guy cooked up without safety precautions to hold him back. Maybe someone will get decapitated by a spinning olympic ring.

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20784040,00.html article on the guy from spiderman leading the "centerpiece of the ceremony"

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:27

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

teen witch posted:

So t.A.T.u is going to play the opening ceremony.

http://www.billboard.com/articles/news/5900927/russian-pop-act-tatu-performing-at-sochi-olympics-opening-ceremony-report

The band thats best known for the lesbian make out rain song, is playing in Sochi. The opening ceremony. In Russia.

they're not lesbians

they're barsexuals

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:27

Rageaholic: May 31, 2005; Old Town Road to EGOT

Toad on a Hat posted:

Anything good happen while i was gone?

Bob Costas said "pussy"

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:28

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 1, 2024 09:40

Grey Fox V2: Nov 14, 2008; Augmented Balls of Titanium!

Preoptopus posted:

On a lighter side, hot chicks of the games.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=puc63uAlTJI

Obviously all the Russians are moonlighting as porn stars.

You're bringing together the best athletes from across the world to compete for gold medals. Of course they're going to be hot as gently caress and this is why they need thousands of condoms in the athletes village.

# ? Feb 7, 2014 05:31

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > Sochi 2014 Megathread 1: Grovergrad - OoOo*

«‹›205 »