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  • Locked thread
angel opportunity
Sep 7, 2004

Total Eclipse of the Heart
I feel pretty confident that Benny put very little work into his piece this week. Even though it was anonymous, I was able to predict it was likely his due to how half-assed it was and due to his lovely attitude in general.

Something like this is just lazy crap that you should be able to fix with even one proofread:

quote:

What we ended up doing was putting the gold into sacks and put a pair in a mine cart under ore. Once we dumped the ore, we'd sneak the sacks deep into the forest and hide them under a layer of sod. After a few days, we finally managed to move all the gold out of the mine.

This was fun too:

quote:

“How much have you saved up?” I asked and continued to pick ore from the walls.

quote:

“Don't joke about that,” I stopped picking and told him. “You know what you'd be doing if you joined them, right?”

quote:

“Get back to work,” a foreman told us in a thick accent. Me and Joaquin resumed picking for ore.

Also:

quote:

“You backstabbing gently caress,” I spat at him.

quote:

I knew at that point that I wouldn't die in the middle of a forest at the hands of a greedy gently caress over a mountain of gold.

quote:

“You loving greedy gently caress!” I screamed and smashed his head in the ground.

I was somewhat defending him in this thread before, but I'm pretty sick of him now. I work forty hours per week and still find time to proofread and polish Thunderdome entries five or six times before I submit them while also doing larger writing projects that aren't part of internet contests. Benny has nothing to do all day and can't even take the time to proofread his poo poo. Writing comes naturally to him, he just never said he's any good at it!

We also posted that he was supposed to claim his story, which he didn't do because he lost, I guess. We had to find the person in IRC who helped him proofread it in order to confirm that it was actually his story. I think he was probably trying to pretend it wasn't his.

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crabrock
Aug 2, 2002

I

AM

MAGNIFICENT






I hardly ever lie in real life. I'm a terrible liar and can't keep secrets or lies without accidentally blurting out the truth. Lying isn't a prerequisite for writing well, but learning to tell the truth through a fictional character is. If you can't even be honest with yourself re: your inability to accomplish even the most basic of tasks, how do you ever expect to become "a writer?"

You have some real problems with your interpretation of reality and how you shape your behavior in response to it. I guess that's where the psychotic diagnosis comes in.

You need serious help that the internet can't give you. Your main goal should be fixing your broke rear end brain, as that's what's keeping you from a job. You're unlikable and unhirable in your current state. You can't lie your way out of psychosis dude.

But through it all you should keep writing, even just an hour a day. THIS IS NOT AN EXCUSE TO NOT DO ANYTHING ELSE, because it will never make you money. It takes 10,000 hours to become truly good at something, and you're competing with millions of people. At your rate of 5 hours a week (this is being very generous), it'd take you about 40 years to reach that mark. Even at 8 hours a day it'd take 3 years. You need to be doing something in the meantime (fixing your broken brain).

crabrock fucked around with this message at 17:42 on Mar 4, 2014

cname
Jan 24, 2013

by Lowtax

Benny the Snake posted:

I just got an email from Olive Garden: they want to schedule an interview with me.

Be a busser. Please, if they ask what you'd like to be, say busboy. Here is why you should be a busboy...

1) Everyone in the restaurant industry starts out as either a busser or host. Typically it's busser unless the applicant is a really good candidate (which you're not)

2) Nobody wants to be a busser, so they'll jump at the opportunity to hire a legal citizen as a busboy.

2) You would make far more money as a busboy. Waiting tables is hard. Making good tips is hard. Some people have the looks, hospitality and social skills to make bank off tips. Let those people wait on tables and make tips so you can claim your percentage at the end of the night. You're a clutzy goon. Don't bother.

3) Waiters usually start off with a 2 table section on their first day to prove they can do the job. Bussers start off with half the restaurant on their first day to prove they can do the job. Waiters will get a 5-6 table section on a good day. You'll be bussing the entire restaurant (every day) once you show you're capable. I couldn't handle more than 3 tables and I'm currently a job-haver. I guarantee you'd be fired once they realize you can't even handle 2 tables.

4) It's a hustle/grind that's incredibly easy to master. Your number one goal is to get the poo poo out of the dining area. Empty bread basket? (get it out of there) Empty drinking glass? (get it out of there and tell a waiter they need a refill.) Someone dropped a knife on the ground? (get it out of there and replace it with a new one)

Another busser will train you on the techniques they use. Usually you have a bin hidden away in the back of the dining room. It's sorta the intermediary bin when you don't have time to sort dishes onto the dish racks. When it's busy, you just chuck all your crap in the intermediary bin, then when things slow down, you empty the bin and sort the dishes.

Even the most colossal messes from 10 person tables is just a matter of shoving it all into a bin, bringing it to the back and dealing with it once you have some time.

Benny, I really hope you can get a job as a busser. I think you can do it. If you show some hustle and can be motivated enough to use any downtime to sweep/wipe/clean/etc. they'll love you. You can make a shitton of money but you really need to take as much work off the wait staff as realistically possible. If a waiter can turn their back on a messy table, take a new table's order, turn back around and the table behind them is magically clean and set, they'll definitely give you a good percentage. This can be the job that teaches you what hard work really is.

Avoid being a waiter at all costs. Be a host if you have to. I assure you, there is no chance in hell you will last more than two days as a waiter.

How to get a job as a busboy Tell them "I'm willing to stay alert. I will use any downtime to clean and scrub. If I see something out of place, I'll put it where it's supposed to go. I know that I need to communicate when I'm moving around. I'm familiar with the phrases "behind you" "corner" and "hot food coming through" I just need someone to show me the best practices to managing the slop in this particular restaurant."

quote:

“Get back to work,” a foreman told us in a thick accent.

What the gently caress is this? Benny, you really have the writing skills of a porn actor trying to be taken seriously. It's not just the fact that I feel dyslexic when reading your words. You miss so many concepts.

What accent? A thick accent? What the gently caress is the point of the accent? Where is he from? Am I supposed to feel the character's intimidating presence because of his non-specific accent? Is it an eastern European accent? Southern Asian, American, Hispanic or French-African? When claiming a character has an accent, you encourage the reader to profile the character. How is the reader supposed to do this when there is no profile?! I'm not saying this as some sort of evil racial profiling or stereotyping, but when you say "he has an accent" it naturally makes the reader curious as to which part of the world the character is from.

cname fucked around with this message at 17:02 on Mar 4, 2014

Dex
May 26, 2006

Quintuple x!!!

Would not escrow again.

VERY MISLEADING!

April posted:

Hey guys I left the thread to get some sleep and I see a bunch of new posts. I'm still getting caught up, did anyone confirm Benny's sex offender status?

Nobody knows exactly which sex offense Benny has committed, no.

life is killing me
Oct 28, 2007

How did this go from a post about a sperg lord living with an overbearing mother to a post about a guy whose writing is worse than mine when I was in sixth grade?

How does the former just organically turn into the latter?

Dex
May 26, 2006

Quintuple x!!!

Would not escrow again.

VERY MISLEADING!

life is killing me posted:

How did this go from a post about a sperg lord living with an overbearing mother to a post about a guy whose writing is worse than mine when I was in sixth grade?

How does the former just organically turn into the latter?

Benny is going to be a bestselling author any day now.

crabrock
Aug 2, 2002

I

AM

MAGNIFICENT






life is killing me posted:

How does the former just organically turn into the latter?

B.A. in English from a technical school.

This should be a lesson to everybody in college still: WORK WHILE YOU'RE IN SCHOOL. Even if you don't need the money, even if it's only part time, even if you're "overqualified" for the job. Do SOMETHING so you have employment history when you graduate.

life is killing me
Oct 28, 2007

Dex posted:

Benny is going to be a bestselling author any day now.

If that was true, wouldn't we all have been bestselling authors before we were in high school?

Tyrannosaurus
Apr 12, 2006

life is killing me posted:

If that was true, wouldn't we all have been bestselling authors before we were in high school?

I thought we all were?

Anonymous Zebra
Oct 21, 2005
Blending in like it ain't no thang
So Benny, I'm going to keep repeating the question...Are you a registered sex offender?

EDIT: He already has admitted that lies by omission in this thread. So if continues to ignore this question take that as an answer.

cname
Jan 24, 2013

by Lowtax

Anonymous Zebra posted:

I'm going to keep repeating the question...

Can we get an hourly log of your day, Benny?

Greg Legg
Oct 6, 2004

systran posted:

We also posted that he was supposed to claim his story, which he didn't do because he lost, I guess. We had to find the person in IRC who helped him proofread it in order to confirm that it was actually his story. I think he was probably trying to pretend it wasn't his.

Goddammit Benny

ThatCguy
Jan 19, 2008

crabrock posted:


This should be a lesson to everybody in college still: WORK WHILE YOU'RE IN SCHOOL. Even if you don't need the money, even if it's only part time, even if you're "overqualified" for the job. Do SOMETHING so you have employment history when you graduate.

Seriously. I'm in my mid 30's, I don't *think* I'm old, but am I just totally unaware of some huge generational shift/gap? I've got nieces & nephews that are 19-20 years old, they've never had a job. Never worked in HS, never had a job in college, etc.

I interview Seniors in college, graduates, etc for both internships and full positions, they have *zero* work experience, none. Not "Hey, I'm not putting down my grocery store job on a resume" type stuff, but literally "I have nothing to put in an application" work history. They have no clue what to do at an interview, and even when we bring some of them on, they have no idea how to function in an office environment. I've had to shitcan more than one person for sleeping at their desk. Not a lunch break or anything mind you, but just putting their head down and passing the gently caress out for an hour at 9:30 in the morning. I've had the "call in hungover" excuses, the walk in an hour late with beer still on your breath. It blows my mind. This isn't blue collar/entry level "pack a box or dig a ditch" type poo poo either, it's white collar work. You know, button down shirt, pair of slacks, nice shoes, work in an office type stuff that pays $20+ hour.

I don't get it. When I was 15, I got a job at a grocery chain, hilariously enough, pushing carts like our favorite resident manchild/lump of crap in this thread. Food service, retail, stock jobs, etc. It was gas, beer and pot money in HS. I worked in college, again, retail, IT, other bullshit. When I graduated, I had a resume to hand people, I had work experience, I knew the expectations of being employed. This is the poo poo that most people take for granted, and yet we've got a whole generation of Bennys that have absolutely no clue.

I'm at a loss.

ThatCguy fucked around with this message at 18:30 on Mar 4, 2014

life is killing me
Oct 28, 2007

Tyrannosaurus posted:

I thought we all were?

Oh...right. Yeah. Yeah, we are. Were? Were. My Mass Effect/Vikings crossover fan fiction was hailed by my mother (my publisher/agent) as the best thing she's read, ever. That says a lot, because she reads some high-level poo poo, like Danielle Steele and Fifty Shades of Grey.

ThatBasqueGuy
Feb 14, 2013

someone introduce jojo to lazyb


life is killing me posted:

Oh...right. Yeah. Yeah, we are. Were? Were. My Mass Effect/Vikings crossover fan fiction was hailed by my mother (my publisher/agent) as the best thing she's read, ever. That says a lot, because she reads some high-level poo poo, like Danielle Steele and Fifty Shades of Grey.

That's it! Benny needs to write erotic fiction!

fakee: I mean the market for self publishing that can't get any lower! No costs!

54 40 or fuck
Jan 4, 2012

No Yanda's allowed

Anonymous Zebra posted:

So Benny, I'm going to keep repeating the question...Are you a registered sex offender?

EDIT: He already has admitted that lies by omission in this thread. So if continues to ignore this question take that as an answer.

Wait, why would he be? Did I miss something?

Also not getting people who don't work in ccollege university. Started working when I was 14 and my work experience helped me to land a great job right out of grad school because on top of having an established resume, I can handle balancing tasks from focusing on school between work.

life is killing me
Oct 28, 2007

ThatBasqueGuy posted:

That's it! Benny needs to write erotic fiction!

fakee: I mean the market for self publishing that can't get any lower! No costs!


See OP, I've been posting in this thread for like ten minutes, and your problem is solved :smug:

Can I get some writing tips from you, o great one?

Death Bot
Mar 4, 2007

Binary killing machines, turning 1 into 0 since 0011000100111001 0011011100110110

cname posted:

What the gently caress is this? Benny, you really have the writing skills of a porn actor trying to be taken seriously. It's not just the fact that I feel dyslexic when reading your words. You miss so many concepts.

What accent? A thick accent? What the gently caress is the point of the accent? Where is he from?

I think my favorite part of the story was two ostensibly Mexican guys speaking Spanish to each other, and the only way that influences the story is the one guy saying ese and holmes.

snortpocket posted:

Eight confirmed dead in tragic endless breadstick incident

He wouldn't stop grating the cheese. He wouldn't stop grating the cheese.

Iron Crowned
May 6, 2003

by Hand Knit

ThatCguy posted:

I interview Seniors in college, graduates, etc for both internships and full positions, they have *zero* work experience, none. Not "Hey, I'm not putting down my grocery store job on a resume" type stuff, but literally "I have nothing to put in an application" work history. They have no clue what to do at an interview, and even when we bring some of them on, they have no idea how to function in an office environment. I've had to shitcan more than one person for sleeping at their desk. Not a lunch break or anything mind you, but just putting their head down and passing the gently caress out for an hour at 9:30 in the morning. I've had the "call in hungover" excuses, the walk in an hour late with beer still on your breath. It blows my mind. This isn't blue collar/entry level "pack a box or dig a ditch" type poo poo either, it's white collar work. You know, button down shirt, pair of slacks, nice shoes, work in an office type stuff that pays $20+ hour.

This is why my brother works at Best Buy at the age of 30 with a 4 year CS degree. He had one previous job for maybe 3 months setting up A/V equipment at his college.

crabrock
Aug 2, 2002

I

AM

MAGNIFICENT






I usually had 2 part-time jobs at once, in different fields (academic/research, and behavioral interventions with youth), on top of clubs and volunteering, as well as my hobbies.

I drove across the country with nothing more than the stuff in my car, and got a full time job with full benefits in 2 days, with absolutely 0 leads or preplanning.

This is why it baffles me that it's been over a year and he can't get a job at loving McDonalds, the cliche of "easiest place to get a job at."

new phone who dis
May 24, 2007

by VideoGames
Morbid Hound

crabrock posted:

I usually had 2 part-time jobs at once, in different fields (academic/research, and behavioral interventions with youth), on top of clubs and volunteering, as well as my hobbies.

I drove across the country with nothing more than the stuff in my car, and got a full time job with full benefits in 2 days, with absolutely 0 leads or preplanning.

This is why it baffles me that it's been over a year and he can't get a job at loving McDonalds, the cliche of "easiest place to get a job at."

CA shits out liberal arts majors like it has been in Mexico drinking water from the tap all weekend. The majority of CA grads aren't trained in fields that the state has any need of. If you didn't have a plan to go with your college other than "get a degree" and you have no work experience you are pretty well hosed.

Alliterate Addict
Jul 10, 2012

dreaming of that face again

it's bright and blue and shimmering

grinning wide and comforting me with it's three warm and wild eyes

ThatCguy posted:

I don't get it. When I was 15, I got a job at a grocery chain, hilariously enough, pushing carts like our favorite resident manchild/lump of crap in this thread. Food service, retail, stock jobs, etc. It was gas, beer and pot money in HS. I worked in college, again, retail, IT, other bullshit. When I graduated, I had a resume to hand people, I had work experience, I knew the expectations of being employed. This is the poo poo that most people take for granted, and yet we've got a whole generation of Bennys that have absolutely no clue.

I'm at a loss.

Not to derail the thread with jobchat, but a lot of positions that were previously the realm of high schoolers are being desperately applied to by people much, much older (you know, like Benny :v:), much more frequently than was the case 15-20 years ago. Add to that the fact that a lot of colleges won't even consider you now without extensive extracurricular activities, and the fact that the tide of "more homework is better" has come back in fairly recently, and it's not too surprising that people are skipping on the $8-an-hour, 20-hours-a-week part time jobs when they're in high school.

Robot_Rumpus
Apr 4, 2004

Benny the Snake posted:

Well I guess I'll have to come clean about "The Bird of Fortune". I wasn't happy with it going in to Sunday when it had to be submitted. I had one person took a look at it and messaged four other people to take a look at it. Why wasn't I happy with it? It was a weak story. It was a point A to point B kind of story with two-dimensional characters and a cliched conflict. I wasn't telling a story, I was leading the reader by the nose. I wanted to bow out of the Thunderdome, but I decided to post because I had to see this through. That's why I keep coming back to the Thunderdome. I don't want to be stuck in an echo chamber and pumping out crap nobody reads thinking it's great like Ignatius from A Confederacy of Dunces. I ask that question to myself every so often: what's separating me from Ignatius J. Reilly? In one sense, I'm actually getting my writing out there for other people to see.

People did not dislike it because it was a 'simple A to B' story progression. They didn't like it because it made no sense. You brought a magical bird into it... why? Where did it go? I am assuming it was linked to the gold somehow but perhaps it had nothing to do with the gold or the plot in any way (so why was it in the story)? Your characters sucked and their decisions made little to no sense.

Benny, it wasn't simplistic, it was crap.

Saeku
Sep 22, 2010

Ursine Asylum posted:

Not to derail the thread with jobchat, but a lot of positions that were previously the realm of high schoolers are being desperately applied to by people much, much older (you know, like Benny :v:), much more frequently than was the case 15-20 years ago. Add to that the fact that a lot of colleges won't even consider you now without extensive extracurricular activities, and the fact that the tide of "more homework is better" has come back in fairly recently, and it's not too surprising that people are skipping on the $8-an-hour, 20-hours-a-week part time jobs when they're in high school.

Yeah, pretty much. It's an employer's market and has been for the past several years -- I work retail and I see the kind of applications we get in. We're not hurting for resumes from adults with full availability who will work for poo poo pay and be happy for whatever hours they're given, so why hire teenagers who have school commitments and won't take the job as seriously?

Queen Elizatits
May 3, 2005

Haven't you heard?
MARATHONS ARE HARD

Toriori posted:

Wait, why would he be? Did I miss something?

I don't think anyone actually thinks he is a sex offender but he apparently gets on IRC with goons and obsesses about wanting to get laid excessively so that combined with the fact he's all proud of himself for lying to the thread about something who knows.

Benny really stop lying, from the start of this thread everyone knew you were lying about things you didn't fool anyone. People just stopped calling you on it because it's pointless and boring. In real life when people have to deal with someone who lies blatantly and constantly they just stop interacting with them. Does that happen to you often? You try and make friends and they eventually drift away? Maybe you get invited to large gatherings every so often that's for the entertainment value, people are laughing at you for whatever ridiculous poo poo you may make up.

Robo Boogie Bot
Sep 4, 2011

crabrock posted:


This is why it baffles me that it's been over a year and he can't get a job at loving McDonalds, the cliche of "easiest place to get a job at."

It shouldn't be that hard, you're right. But we are dealing with someone that has been telling prospective employers that he does not have reliable transportation to work. I've always looked at that question on job applications and thought, "who would actually check that box?" Yesterday I finally received an answer to that question, and its Benny.

Based on this, I really think Benny needs a back to basics approach to his job search. He's spent all this time creating 20+ versions of his resume and cover letter while inserting cheeky questions, ("Well what traits does your ideal candidate have?" :smuggo: ) all while he's been failing at basic filter questions on the application.

Benny, from now on you have reliable transport to work. You've never been convicted of any crimes. You've never been terminated from a job. You are willing to take a drug test. Above all, you need to indicate that your schedule is wide open and that you want to start as soon as possible.

If you get an interview, again, emphasize the flexible schedule and eagerness to start. Ask about what an average shift would look like, how long the training period is ect, sick to normal questions. By no means necessary should you be pulling out a question or comment that you got off of a 20 Ways Canidates Have Impressed an HR Manager article on Monster.

cname
Jan 24, 2013

by Lowtax

Ursine Asylum posted:

Not to derail the thread with jobchat, but a lot of positions that were previously the realm of high schoolers are being desperately applied to by people much, much older (you know, like Benny :v:), much more frequently than was the case 15-20 years ago. Add to that the fact that a lot of colleges won't even consider you now without extensive extracurricular activities, and the fact that the tide of "more homework is better" has come back in fairly recently, and it's not too surprising that people are skipping on the $8-an-hour, 20-hours-a-week part time jobs when they're in high school.

"You know, like Benny :v:" Being the key quote here. An awkward, inexperienced kid is 10x more appealing than an awkward, inexperienced manchild.

It's a shame, I feel as though this quote is extremely prevalent, when it comes to corporations, however less relevant when relating to smaller-scale businesses and local shops. (The shame being that corps are dominating smaller-scale, local shops.)

MacDonalds, BK, KFC, GameStop, etc. are all bloated, tacky, corporate-policy, trash receptacles, so of course they'll hire the 40 year old pit-stain, because they figure he needs the job more and won't quit, no matter what.

Cool, local places like general stores, snack shacks, ice cream shops, etc. would maintain a much better image by having a young person behind the counter.

Point is, stop hiring old people as cashiers. It's hella awkward to have someone older than me doing a shittier job and making less money. When a high school kid puts the juice on top of the bread it's like "Ha ha. He'll learn one day." but when an adult does it, it's like "What the gently caress is this loser addicted to? I wonder how much his child support forces him to pay each month. Probably not enough to cover diapers."

Let's restore the whole "hire youngins if you can" trend. The old and useless will have to starve to death, but in the end it'll be well worth it.

Saeku posted:

why hire teenagers who have school commitments and won't take the job as seriously?

Who gives a poo poo? Half the time, the job just needs to get done and the amount of seriousness applied is fairly pointless as long as what needs to get done, gets done. The two applicants are gonna be exactly the same. The kid is gonna be a dumb kid on his first try, but the adult is gonna be a loving grown-rear end adult who has clearly failed in the past.

The younger you are, the more adaptable your brain is. Young people can improve. Old people are set in their ways.

cname fucked around with this message at 20:04 on Mar 4, 2014

Magnus Gallant
Mar 9, 2010

by Lowtax
Grimey Drawer
Benny have you considered buying an ounce of weed and then selling it in smaller portions for more money than you paid for it?

You get to set your own hours, you don't have a boss, you meet new interesting people every day, and while you're doing it you can sit around all day and post on your favorite comedy forum.

Just don't sell it to cops.

Edit: also you don't need a car, people will come to you!

Also don't list it on your resume.

Magnus Gallant fucked around with this message at 20:05 on Mar 4, 2014

cname
Jan 24, 2013

by Lowtax
/\ Hahahaha he lives in Cali! Doubt he'll get any customers.

That Damn Satyr
Nov 4, 2008

A connoisseur of fine junk
Ok, so maybe it's reaching, but I think here's another little lie. I definately proofread Benny's story and gave him feedback on it...

Benny the Snake posted:

I asked four different people and only got back from one. Granted, I reached out the day before but I'm sure if I got more feedback, the story would've been much, much better.

....but aparently at least one other person also gave him feedback, but he said only one did.

systran posted:

We also posted that he was supposed to claim his story, which he didn't do because he lost, I guess. We had to find the person in IRC who helped him proofread it in order to confirm that it was actually his story. I think he was probably trying to pretend it wasn't his.

The way this is worded implies that the person here was the one that gave him feedback and helped him with it... So which is it, Benny? Why would you lie about something so stupidly simple as how many people proofread and gave you feedback on your story?

Death Bot
Mar 4, 2007

Binary killing machines, turning 1 into 0 since 0011000100111001 0011011100110110

Ursine Asylum posted:

Not to derail the thread with jobchat, but a lot of positions that were previously the realm of high schoolers are being desperately applied to by people much, much older (you know, like Benny :v:), much more frequently than was the case 15-20 years ago. Add to that the fact that a lot of colleges won't even consider you now without extensive extracurricular activities, and the fact that the tide of "more homework is better" has come back in fairly recently, and it's not too surprising that people are skipping on the $8-an-hour, 20-hours-a-week part time jobs when they're in high school.

Some more anecdata here, trying to apply to jobs about 2 years ago and it took me half a year and my mom being closer personal friends with a store manager to get me a job at Little Caesar's. Then after nearly half a year of looking and applying for better positions, my mom's husband got me a job at a machine shop because he was close personal friends with the owner of the shop. When I quit that job because it prevented me from going to school because it was a 50+ hour week and nearly an hour away from my house, it took me another 4 months to find an office job because a close high school friend got me in when his college buddy got him in.

At this point being smart, on the ball, and friendly isn't quite enough to get you a job within a week depending on where you live anymore, and I can't imagine how hard it would have been if I didn't have a car. It doesn't help that I'm dealing with the additional fallout from auto companies due to living in the rust belt, but most people I know who could get away with it didn't work for poo poo until at least college because doing well in high school is more important in the long run unless you don't have college aspirations.

Alliterate Addict
Jul 10, 2012

dreaming of that face again

it's bright and blue and shimmering

grinning wide and comforting me with it's three warm and wild eyes

cname posted:

MacDonalds, BK, KFC, GameStop, etc. are all bloated, tacky, corporate-policy, trash receptacles, so of course they'll hire the 40 year old pit-stain, because they figure he needs the job more and won't quit, no matter what.

Cool, local places like general stores, snack shacks, ice cream shops, etc. would maintain a much better image by having a young person behind the counter.

Point is, stop hiring old people as cashiers. It's hella awkward to have someone older than me doing a shittier job and making less money.

Let's restore the whole "hire youngins if you can" trend. The old and useless will have to starve to death, but in the end it'll be well worth it.

The younger you are, the more adaptable your brain is. Young people can improve. Old people are set in their ways.

Yeah you stick it to those single moms working 2 or 3 jobs to make ends meet. :psyduck:

I really hope this post is some sort of meta-ironic attempt at a joke or something.

life is killing me
Oct 28, 2007

Not to be a grammar/spelling Nazi dickcunt since I am positive I do this myself, but I've detected spelling inaccuracies and small grammatical errors in posts made by persons who either told Benny he sucked at writing, or admitted to proofreading his story. Or both.

But then, you proofread your own poo poo, you miss things. Have someone else proofread it, they find things you can't believe you hosed up or misspelled.

At any rate, he still sucks. I don't even have to read his entire story to know this; it's evident in the sentences pulled from it and quote for my reading displeasure in this very thread.

This is goddamn gold. Gold.

That Damn Satyr
Nov 4, 2008

A connoisseur of fine junk

life is killing me posted:

Not to be a grammar/spelling Nazi dickcunt since I am positive I do this myself, but I've detected spelling inaccuracies and small grammatical errors in posts made by persons who either told Benny he sucked at writing, or admitted to proofreading his story. Or both.

But then, you proofread your own poo poo, you miss things. Have someone else proofread it, they find things you can't believe you hosed up or misspelled.

At any rate, he still sucks. I don't even have to read his entire story to know this; it's evident in the sentences pulled from it and quote for my reading displeasure in this very thread.

This is goddamn gold. Gold.

I type half of my posts on a phone while strung out on heavy drugs for chronic pain, so there is that. :v: But still, just about any person can read something and tell you if it generally makes sense or not.

Alliterate Addict
Jul 10, 2012

dreaming of that face again

it's bright and blue and shimmering

grinning wide and comforting me with it's three warm and wild eyes

life is killing me posted:

Not to be a grammar/spelling Nazi dickcunt since I am positive I do this myself, but I've detected spelling inaccuracies and small grammatical errors in posts made by persons who either told Benny he sucked at writing, or admitted to proofreading his story. Or both.

Without a doubt; everyone makes mistakes. That having been said, most people in this thread* aren't claiming to be english majors who want to write the next Great Novel and/or teach English. Ragging on Benny's grammar and writing skills didn't really come up until Benny claiming he wanted to do one or both of those, and it only really took root because instead of saying "Yeah I could improve", Benny's response was "Well it's message board posts, I'm not actually trying to write well here."

So yeah, at this point it's more of a joke than anything, but what in this thread isn't?


*this may have changed with the influx of TD regulars

cname
Jan 24, 2013

by Lowtax

Ursine Asylum posted:

Yeah you stick it to those single moms working 2 or 3 jobs to make ends meet. :psyduck:

I really hope this post is some sort of meta-ironic attempt at a joke or something.

It's not so much about adults doing jobs which kids used to do. It's more the fact that I see tons of adults doing jobs that kids used to do and failing miserably.

If a single mother can't figure out that the general public would prefer salami spread across the Italian sub, as opposed to concentrated in one area then yea. gently caress her. Hire a kid who will fix their defunct behavior instead of repeating it over and over and over and over again.

I'm biased, because in my experience, younger people have been better workers than their elders.

cname fucked around with this message at 20:46 on Mar 4, 2014

BrainParasite
Jan 24, 2003


I don't know how it happened, but some of you in this thread are dumber and more clueless than Benny. Congratulations.

life is killing me
Oct 28, 2007

BrainParasite posted:

I don't know how it happened, but some of you in this thread are dumber and more clueless than Benny. Congratulations.

Cite your sources or your opinion will not be considered :colbert:

life is killing me
Oct 28, 2007

Ursine Asylum posted:

Without a doubt; everyone makes mistakes. That having been said, most people in this thread* aren't claiming to be english majors who want to write the next Great Novel and/or teach English. Ragging on Benny's grammar and writing skills didn't really come up until Benny claiming he wanted to do one or both of those, and it only really took root because instead of saying "Yeah I could improve", Benny's response was "Well it's message board posts, I'm not actually trying to write well here."

So yeah, at this point it's more of a joke than anything, but what in this thread isn't?


*this may have changed with the influx of TD regulars

Well I mean, I just re-read that post and I found an error of my own. I'm going to go hang myself now.

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docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

BrainParasite posted:

I don't know how it happened, but some of you in this thread are dumber and more clueless than Benny. Congratulations.

This thread and Benny have always been made for each other.

  • Locked thread