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Port o shitter in Afghanistan E: not me
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Jul 21, 2014 03:27
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Lazy Reservist posted:Not tech school, but in the Deid, a couple of cops were caught under one of the Cadillac shitters.  oh god why? There were at least a few places on crappy compound that would have been far less dirty and less likely to get caught.
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Jul 21, 2014 03:49
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I just got confirmation from homefacts.com that a guy that was in my shop is indeed a child molester. According to a news article, he was diddling kids in the same time period he was in my shop. Ugh.
Cojawfee fucked around with this message at 03:56 on Jul 21, 2014 |
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Jul 21, 2014 03:53
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SumYungGui posted:What is the nastiest place people have bumped uglies during training that everyone knows of? In training? DFS in a trench, caught on NVG. Deployed, forward lower lobe of an AWACS.
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Jul 21, 2014 12:24
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It probably wasn't super dirty but people would bang in that pavilion on the parade grounds at Sheppard. Dirty would have to go to behind (urban legend says in but I doubt it) the dumpsters behind the old med dorms but that seemed retarded since you could just run across the roof and do it inside. E: Running trails at Manas. That ~sometimes~ padlocked door on a chainlinked fence always left me feeling super secure but at least it gave people the chance to gently caress on IR. Still can't believe that we A. left those worthless inbred fucks permanent structures and B. that we cleaned them out before we left. Not like they didn't live in their own filth anyway. Cenen fucked around with this message at 12:40 on Jul 21, 2014 |
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Jul 21, 2014 12:35
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Cenen posted:E: Running trails at Manas. The proper name for those trails is Handjob Forest. We had a genius on my crew. He slipped one of the Kyrgyz shuttle drivers thirty bucks' worth of Com, closed up the blinds and straight bang bus'ed it out while the driver drove in slow circles until he was done. Probably got bed bugs on his poo poo but it's still about the best way I've heard.
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Jul 21, 2014 14:56
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Porta shitters and dumpsters at Camp Victory. Not sure why since there were plenty better places but I know it happened. Anywhere on a ship. First deployment they busted a couple grinding it out in an F-14 intake in the middle of the night. Most hilarious was sandbox liberty in Dubai where a dude had his girl bent over behind one of the food shacks with about 8 other dudes watching the show.
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Jul 21, 2014 15:01
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At Fort Sam it was a tradition to bang in the bushes outside of the 232 dfac. Or in the music practice rooms in the Hacienda. On deployment, we had the ambulances with beds right in the back. No shitter loving for us.
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Jul 21, 2014 15:04
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PLANES CURE TOWERS posted:At Fort Sam it was a tradition to bang in the bushes outside of the 232 dfac. Or in the music practice rooms in the Hacienda. Medical pogs have the distinct advantage of empty beds in the clinic.
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Jul 21, 2014 15:13
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You'd think but from what I've gathered no one ever bothers to clean up afterword and gets caught pretty quick.
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Jul 21, 2014 15:23
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vulturesrow posted:Anywhere on a ship. First deployment they busted a couple grinding it out in an F-14 intake in the middle of the night. Crew chief gonna get pissed at literal fuckery breaking the gently caress out of his plane.
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Jul 21, 2014 15:41
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Cenen posted:You'd think but from what I've gathered no one ever bothers to clean up afterword and gets caught pretty quick. I know it definitely happens and yes they are usually stupid enough to get caught. EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:Crew chief gonna get pissed at literal fuckery breaking the gently caress out of his plane. Tomcats were always broke anyhow.
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Jul 21, 2014 15:59
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Worst I can remember is inside the TACAN and ILS shelters on the airfield. They weren't really dirty though. Hell, the TACAN shelter was finished inside and air conditioned, along with having a locked door. And you'd have about a 5 minute warning of anyone coming because they would have to get permission from the tower to drive onto the airfield. I guess behind the washers in the laundry room at BMT is pretty gross too.
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Jul 21, 2014 18:31
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I used to find it highly amusing, walking around Camp Fallujah at night to the chow hall for midrats or to the internet center to get a phone call in before whatever and having to walk past the dozens of porta-shitter lines, never failing to find the odd 2 or 3 shitters where sounds of soft slapping and not so well controlled grunting filled the space around it. Tommy knocking porta shitters while people hosed inside was a pretty good time too. Had some people come running out I had never expected to see. Occifers and enlisted of all types.. Nastiest though would have had to of been the porta shitter on the east side of camp that the cleaners missed cleaning out about once a month. So you'd get poo poo stacked 6' above the bowl and could still catch pogs from CEB loving in it if you paid enough attention.
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Jul 21, 2014 18:57
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Concrete bunker in Afghanistan. A spider or something bit me on the rear end  .When I was Goodfellow I was walking to PT and caught two privates getting ready to go at it in some bushes. I threw my water bottle at them and they scattered.
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Jul 21, 2014 19:13
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bunker too, also unused CHUs and a bunch of mosquitos bit her in the rear end, lol.
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Jul 21, 2014 19:15
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That reminds me of an idiot story that involves me! When we were on Bagram my job involved sitting in a truck for hours and hours every night hoping for the possibility of getting to shoot rockets. Our firing point was in the middle of a bunch of bunkers that were dug into some dirt hills. After staring at these night after night we realized one had a rusty old lock on it that we could very easily cut with the bolt cutters in our truck. We busted the lock open and went inside. There was a lot of spiders, dust, and stacked up boxes. We kicked a couple boxes and walked in a little further and suddenly saw the giant stacks of mortar rounds, arty shells, and that all the boxes had little explosions drawn on them. We bolted out of there as fast as we could. The next time we went out there we noticed a GIGANTIC padlock was slapped onto all the bunkers.
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Jul 21, 2014 19:23
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 Were these filled with some ancient Russian ordinance left over from the 80s or something?
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Jul 21, 2014 20:11
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That's what we guessed, but we didn't stick around long enough to investigate further.
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Jul 21, 2014 20:31
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I jerked off a couple times in a portashitter during a winter exercise. The water froze over so all the poop was sitting on top of a sheet of ice. It was almost up to the seat when we left. The company we rented the thing from taped the vents up and put a cheap space heater inside, that failed a couple days in after trying to cope with -50 at night. The second time I did it I got a really bad headache so I might have breathed too many fumes or something. Don't think I'll ever do that again.
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Jul 21, 2014 22:16
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SumYungGui posted:What is the nastiest place people have bumped uglies during training that everyone knows of? Best I got is between two dumpsters in the dumpster stall behind an AAFES gas station. Probably tame in comparison to what someone has seen, but it was pretty trashy between those dumpsters. Had a female running a whorehouse of herself out of a portashitter in Iraq, but it was more the amount of dick she got that was obscene than the location. That, and how much she made.
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Jul 21, 2014 22:28
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PathAsc posted:Had a female running a whorehouse of herself out of a portashitter in Iraq, but it was more the amount of dick she got that was obscene than the location. That, and how much she made. Tell us more! This sounds like a much better story than 
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Jul 21, 2014 23:58
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Dingleberry posted:Tell us more! This sounds like a much better story than Moral of that story: maintain your personal weapon, and don't get caught. If you're about to get caught, eat a bullet.
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Jul 22, 2014 00:14
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PathAsc posted:Had a female running a whorehouse of herself out of a portashitter in Iraq, but it was more the amount of dick she got that was obscene than the location. That, and how much she made. generation fill
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Jul 22, 2014 00:27
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Dingleberry posted:Tell us more! This sounds like a much better story than I thought that had to be a photoshop, but nope--actual title.
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Jul 22, 2014 01:13
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Derek Dominoe posted:I thought that had to be a photoshop, but nope--actual title. pvt lynch saw more combat than veins at the very least
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Jul 22, 2014 01:37
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Kung Fu Fist gently caress posted:pvt lynch saw more combat than veins at the very least 
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Jul 22, 2014 01:40
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Jul 22, 2014 01:48
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Kung Fu Fist gently caress posted:pvt lynch saw more combat than veins at the very least Lmao
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Jul 22, 2014 02:17
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Kung Fu Fist gently caress posted:pvt lynch saw more combat than veins at the very least 
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Jul 22, 2014 02:24
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Kung Fu Fist gently caress posted:pvt lynch saw more combat than veins at the very least boomshakalaka
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Jul 22, 2014 02:31
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Kung Fu Fist gently caress posted:pvt lynch saw more combat than veins at the very least lol I thought I saw some once but it turned out it was just a range.
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Jul 22, 2014 16:43
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Kung Fu Fist gently caress posted:pvt lynch saw more combat than veins at the very least 
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Jul 22, 2014 16:45
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Kung Fu Fist gently caress posted:pvt lynch saw more combat than veins at the very least 
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Jul 22, 2014 20:35
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i dont get it
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Jul 22, 2014 21:43
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Affi posted:i dont get it veins, unlike real marines (see: John Cena, Schneider's corpse) has never killed a man.
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Jul 22, 2014 21:48
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Victor Vermis posted:Schneider's corpse Stay safe Poverty Ghost
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Jul 23, 2014 02:55
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In eve online I scam people although I have recently taken a break. Last week I taught a friend my method and then yesterday I got a message that he had scammed someone out of the largest ship in eve. Turns out some guy had just gotten back from Afghanistan and spent over a thousand dollars of his deployment money buying internet money which he promptly got scammed out of.
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Jul 23, 2014 03:18
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Cenen posted:Stay safe Poverty Ghost
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Jul 23, 2014 03:25
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Reverand maynard posted:In eve online I scam people although I have recently taken a break. Last week I taught a friend my method and then yesterday I got a message that he had scammed someone out of the largest ship in eve. Turns out some guy had just gotten back from Afghanistan and spent over a thousand dollars of his deployment money buying internet money which he promptly got scammed out of. turns out everyone in this story is scamming themselves by playing eve
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Jul 23, 2014 03:30
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