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Lamprey Cannon posted:So, they never explained where that prophecy actually came from in the prequels, did they? I presume some piece of EU material came in to fill that void? Obviously (Wookiepedia delivers). It is as dumb and convoluted as you'd expect. oh and A great example of creativity posted:
 that is, like, deep, maaaaan ~
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Dec 9, 2014 02:23
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I CANNOT EJACULATE WITHOUT SEEING NATIVE AMERICANS BRUTALISED!
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kingcom posted:Its star wars so no? why are you posting itt if you dont like star wars
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Dec 9, 2014 02:25
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Fetus Tree posted:why are you posting itt if you dont like star wars The Something Awful Forums > Main > GBS - its kind of like a hip hop twitter > post the Star Wars EU thing that makes you cringe the most itt
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Dec 9, 2014 02:26
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blowfish posted:Obviously (Wookiepedia delivers). It is as dumb and convoluted as you'd expect. That article posted:The prophecy was one of hundreds of obscure legends maintained by the Jedi Order, though its origins and actual content remain unknown. It was thought to have been created by the earliest Jedi philosophers, after the creation of the Galactic Republic but before the Jedi assumed an active role in it. So, not only is it a prophecy that says next to nothing, but nobody actually knows where it came from? And nobody knows exactly how it's worded?
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Dec 9, 2014 02:48
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kingcom posted:The Something Awful Forums > Main > GBS - its kind of like a hip hop twitter > post the Star Wars EU thing that makes you cringe the most itt If youre reading star wars eu at all i assume you like star wars
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Dec 9, 2014 03:21
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Fetus Tree posted:If youre reading star wars eu at all i assume you like star wars I liked star wars once. ONCE. Ice cream man is still the best thing in the setting though.
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Dec 9, 2014 03:23
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Time of greatest despair? Things seemed relatively fine when the first movie started and anakin was like 5
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Dec 9, 2014 03:35
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Coruscant suffered basically no change even though huge battles were going on in it's orbit. I mean, you'd think the place would start looking a bit shabby after a few orbital bombardments but I guess the droids were only programmed to shoot at clones + lucas was a bad writer
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Dec 9, 2014 03:36
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This is the best character http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Bosbit_Matarcher quote:Bosbit Matarcher was a Human male from the planet Delemede. In 212 BBY, when he was thirty-five years old, Matarcher bought a Delemedian starhopper, believing he had gotten a great deal for the starship. However, when he engaged the hyperdrive to take a quick jump outsystem, the relativistic shield on the starhopper—which was supposed to protect Matarcher from the strange bends in time and space associated with traveling at such hypervelocity—malfunctioned. The journey to leave the Delemede system took a mere two hours for Matarcher, but when he exited hyperspace, he found that to the outside galaxy, 190 years had passed, making it 22 BBY. Matarcher was now 225 standard years old. whoopsie
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Dec 9, 2014 03:48
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Tater Love 
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Well at least he won't have any trouble re acclimating because technology and culture in Star Wars doesn't change at all in 1900 years, much less 190. Hell the ship probably didn't even lose any value.
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Dec 9, 2014 03:52
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Chomp8645 posted:Well at least he won't have any trouble re acclimating because technology and culture in Star Wars doesn't change at all in 1900 years, much less 190. Hell the ship probably didn't even lose any value. I never got that how come every one is so dumb is there no school
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Dec 9, 2014 04:22
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spice is a helluva drug
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Dec 9, 2014 04:26
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TOILETLORD posted:I never got that how come every one is so dumb is there no school I think that people in Star Wars are actually well educated and proficient in a technical sense, but are firmly rooted in tradition and completely lack creativity. Basically it's a galaxy of Koreans.
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Dec 9, 2014 04:26
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Chomp8645 posted:I think that people in Star Wars are actually well educated and proficient in a technical sense, but are firmly rooted in tradition and completely lack creativity. no it makes no sense unless all scientist are just really maintenance dudes. Unless they literally go to a point where it is impossible to make better technology
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Dec 9, 2014 04:29
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TOILETLORD posted:no it makes no sense unless all scientist are just really maintenance dudes. Unless they literally go to a point where it is impossible to make better technology Maybe the technology has reached the limit of the human brain to comprehend, and since the Republic ain't down with genetic engineering or AI development that it's impossible to advance anymore. makes u think...
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Dec 9, 2014 04:33
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If I remember right, their technology was all created eons ago by a long dead race of smart people. Humans and other aliens found this old technology and got it to work, but don't fully understand how it works. Like, they don't know what makes a hyperdrive jump really, just that it does. So they can replicate the stuff and even make improvements and tweaks, but they can't really innovate. But the real answer is they want Star Wars to feel like Star Wars regardless of what era it's in.
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Dec 9, 2014 04:44
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Star Wars kinds works in an alchemical, Spontaneous Generation sense where a world can be wracked with pollution and continuously strip-mined and a thousand years later it's still wracked with pollution and still being strip-mined, and a high-tech prototype is likely just as good as an ancient artifact I actually think what bugs me most about the EU is retroactively assigning jedi character classes from KOTOR to people, and everything to do with lightsaber styles
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Dec 9, 2014 04:48
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Wait, so was Anakin really supposed to be a virgin birth? I remember going to watch the first prequel with my dad (who was super excited, having seen the originals in the theater) and when Anakin's stupid mom announces that he was born without a man or whatever, my dad said "Oh for gently caress's sake!"
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Dec 9, 2014 04:49
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OMG BYZANTIUM posted:Wait, so was Anakin really supposed to be a virgin birth? I remember going to watch the first prequel with my dad (who was super excited, having seen the originals in the theater) and when Anakin's stupid mom announces that he was born without a man or whatever, my dad said "Oh for gently caress's sake!" "Conceived by the force" I think. The Force is the milkman of Star Wars.
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Dec 9, 2014 04:52
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OMG BYZANTIUM posted:Wait, so was Anakin really supposed to be a virgin birth? I remember going to watch the first prequel with my dad (who was super excited, having seen the originals in the theater) and when Anakin's stupid mom announces that he was born without a man or whatever, my dad said "Oh for gently caress's sake!" historically that just meant you didn't know who the father was because you got boned so much, back when they didn't care about the patriarchy so much as the matriarchy since they could only prove a child belonged to a mother that birthed them.
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Dec 9, 2014 05:28
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OMG BYZANTIUM posted:Wait, so was Anakin really supposed to be a virgin birth? I remember going to watch the first prequel with my dad (who was super excited, having seen the originals in the theater) and when Anakin's stupid mom announces that he was born without a man or whatever, my dad said "Oh for gently caress's sake!" Yeah, he's legit Jedi Jesus. There's also a part in the third one where it's kind of implied Palpatine (or his master, Darth Baddude) manipulated the Force to create Anakin.
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Dec 9, 2014 05:34
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burritolingus posted:Yeah, he's legit Jedi Jesus. Plagueius, Sidious's Master.
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Dec 9, 2014 05:35
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redshirt posted:Plagueius, Sidious's Master. Darth names are bad but which is worse: Darth Tyranus or Count Dooku?
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Dec 9, 2014 05:39
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burritolingus posted:Darth names are bad but which is worse: Darth Tyranus or Count Dooku? Dooku. What a dumb name.
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Dec 9, 2014 05:41
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Darth Try anus. Also Sheev Palpatine.
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Dec 9, 2014 05:47
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burritolingus posted:Darth names are bad but which is worse: Darth Tyranus or Count Dooku? savage opress, cad bane, zero the hutt come to mind.
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Dec 9, 2014 05:50
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TOILETLORD posted:savage opress, cad bane, zero the hutt come to mind. Darth Andeddu is the darth known for bringing people back from the dead.
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Dec 9, 2014 05:53
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OMG BYZANTIUM posted:Wait, so was Anakin really supposed to be a virgin birth? I remember going to watch the first prequel with my dad (who was super excited, having seen the originals in the theater) and when Anakin's stupid mom announces that he was born without a man or whatever, my dad said "Oh for gently caress's sake!" I never caught that bit of Phantom Menace. What other horrible poo poo did I miss from that movie?
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Dec 9, 2014 06:13
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Well, Anakin IS Force Jesus. He dies as Vader and spends some time in Hell, but Rises to redeem all of creation with an act of violence.
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Dec 9, 2014 06:22
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No Vader no hope. Know Vader know hope.
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Dec 9, 2014 06:25
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Arcsquad12 posted:Did this mod happen to be called Phoenix Rising? Because goddamn if that isn't the spergiest game mod I have ever seen. Every single mentioned planet in its canonical position on the Galactic Map, every ship to scale, and it took three hours to research a basic Star Destroyer. it was probably something like that, yeah. i found the best mod was by those german steiner guys, at least back then it seemed pretty awesome
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Dec 9, 2014 06:49
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TOILETLORD posted:savage opress, cad bane, zero the hutt come to mind. I saw an episode with Cad Bane, where he pulled off a heist in the Jedi temple. Seemed like a way better character than his name would suggest, Savage Opress though, god drat.
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Dec 9, 2014 06:51
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burritolingus posted:Darth names are bad but which is worse: Darth Tyranus or Count Dooku? Darth Dooku
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Dec 9, 2014 07:00
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Ivor Biggun posted:Darth Dooku I just can't unhear Darth Goku.
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Dec 9, 2014 07:05
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ThePutty posted:it was probably something like that, yeah. i found the best mod was by those german steiner guys, at least back then it seemed pretty awesome Empire at War was a sweet game. I got one mod that let you do all the clone wars stuff and upgrade into imperial tech. Also Wicker Man posted:I just can't unhear Darth Goku.
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Dec 9, 2014 07:26
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Wicker Man posted:I just can't unhear Darth Goku. 
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Dec 9, 2014 07:39
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So they apparently got "Dooku" from "doku," the Japanese word for poison. Should have just stayed with Doku. Also supposedly Dooku means "from the rear end" in Portuguese, so he's called "Dookan" in the Brazilian version. Also a better name.Ivor Biggun posted:Darth Dooku Perfect.
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Dec 9, 2014 07:47
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Like that Goku doesn't even need a handle for a lightsaber.
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Dec 9, 2014 07:50
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All Star Wars names are created by a teen trying to find a new username on the internet. What if I write my name backwards... What if I look up this word in a different language... What about like... Darth... Deathdark420
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Dec 9, 2014 08:14
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darth niggerstomper58
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Dec 9, 2014 08:44
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