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Being in the military teaches you just how prudish most people are. Once you get used to being surrounded by a forest of dicks just to get clean day after day body image just ceases to be a thing.
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Jan 11, 2015 19:04
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FAT SLAMPIG posted:also sometimes those people all have loaded weapons and they are all overtired
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Jan 11, 2015 19:09
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EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:Being in the military teaches you just how prudish most people are. Once you get used to being surrounded by a forest of dicks just to get clean day after day body image just ceases to be a thing. When the other two guys at your urinal have to pee just as bad as you do, so all three of you are blasting porcelein and your collective piss-mist tickles your wrists like tiny golden snowflakes.. that's brotherhood.
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Jan 11, 2015 19:12
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Willy Pete posted:So really, boot camp is like 10 weeks of high school gym class with automatic weapons. so its just high school today
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Jan 11, 2015 19:17
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Victor Vermis posted:When the other two guys at your urinal have to pee just as bad as you do, so all three of you are blasting porcelein and your collective piss-mist tickles your wrists like tiny golden snowflakes.. that's brotherhood. it's not real brotherhood until you've drank a bottle of your buddy's piss.
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Jan 11, 2015 19:31
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FAT SLAMPIG posted:so its just high school today
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Jan 11, 2015 19:33
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I'd probably do high school again before I'd go back through boot camp/mct
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Jan 11, 2015 22:04
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Internet Wizard posted:I'd probably do high school again before I'd go back through boot camp/mct
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Jan 11, 2015 22:11
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Fucitol posted:is this b/c the af ti would be the one holding the camera, trying to get everyone to get in frame, and saying "cheese"? If it was really that difficult to figure out I can explain  for you.
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Jan 11, 2015 23:06
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Willy Pete posted:So really, boot camp is like 10 weeks of high school gym class with automatic weapons. Not really because you got to go home from high school, boot camp was retard mode 24/7 for the full 9 weeks, or in my case 16 because I was extra dumb and did a job which had combined basic and AIT for 16 straight weeks of fun in Ft. Knox.
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Jan 11, 2015 23:07
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Willy Pete posted:So really, boot camp is like 10 weeks of high school gym class with automatic weapons. i describe boot camp as a really unfun summer camp
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Jan 11, 2015 23:09
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justice4trayvawn posted:i describe boot camp as a really unfun summer camp Except you might learn about bugs or something interesting useful at summer camp, where as you will learn nothing of use at basic. Well, you (army) learn how to shoot a gun, but if you've ever shot a gun before then you didn't learn anything. Some people learn to drive in the army, I suppose, but that is shameful and you should keep it to yourself. They always become terrible drivers.
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Jan 11, 2015 23:28
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Godholio posted:If it was really that difficult to figure out I can explain thx but I think i'll pass
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Jan 12, 2015 00:01
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not caring here posted:Except you might learn about bugs or something interesting useful at summer camp, where as you will learn nothing of use at basic. Seriously, what is with Motor T and being terrible, terrible drivers? I mean I get that if you're in Motor T you are by default a retard, but god drat.
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Jan 12, 2015 00:07
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USMC503 posted:Seriously, what is with Motor T and being terrible, terrible drivers? My late grandfather was a trucker. Back in the olden days, the IDF would commandeer people's vehicles, and trucks were particularly sought after: he would insist on driving his own commandeered truck, 'cause he didn't want those assholes to wreck it. So even my trucker grandad wouldn't trust military drivers farther than he could punt them from the driver's seat.
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Jan 12, 2015 00:18
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I learned how to drive in Iraq.
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Jan 12, 2015 00:24
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CE decided yesterday was a good day to send several people to qualify for 12 hours at an outdoor range, it was -10 to -5 yesterday. A few of those guys now have frostbite on their faces.
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Jan 12, 2015 00:33
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Master Bateman posted:I learned how to drive in Iraq. We had a kid come to us near the end of our deployment in Baghdad. He had never driven before, never had a license. Someone decided to shove him into the driver's seat of the lead humvee on his very first day on patrol. I'm driving right behind him, he slams on his brakes and somehow puts it into reverse and slams into my front bumper. No one thought to ask him if he had ever driven before, or even check for a license or anything.
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Jan 12, 2015 00:35
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one drill weekend our new CO (who was a state trooper) decided a good training exercise would be to get everyone into their vehicles and practice a convoy in the city our Armory was in. He insisted we all let our antennas flop free, which of course hit every loving tree and telephone wire along the way. Best part through was making a dude without a license drive a M997 in it. He sideswipped a car along the way. The CO disappeared for a bit and we never found out what happened with it. Also there was the girl who used the throttle lock in a LMTV as a cruise control and promptly read ended a Lexus on an exit ramp at 40 mph. She was promoted to E-5 a couple months later.
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Jan 12, 2015 00:42
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USMC503 posted:Seriously, what is with Motor T and being terrible, terrible drivers? Transport is pretty loving bad, but having been to the benning licensing centre for a whole month getting qualified to drive buses and poo poo, the license dude easily put the worst drivers as the RTB and 3rd ranger batt. I think it may have something to do with how hooah your job and unit is, telling you that you are special snowflakes blah blah blah. The old dudes there would tell me all kind of hosed up stories about how a ranger batt CO used to get a SSG and send him out with a bunch of joes for a ride around the block, and the CO would sign off on all their licenses to qualify them to drive pretty much anything. You'd get the usual accidents, but then a couple of morons played chicken with a couple of bluebirds but no one chickened out. 2 bluebirds hosed, both drivers dead and a bunch of injuries for everyone else. Then you got them racing around on quad bikes on the road like a bunch of idiots who have never ridden 4 wheelers. I personally saw a loving crazy rollover where a dude rolled it over with some speed, and the quad rolled over him, and either he hung on or it dragged him back up and flung him about 8 feet up in the air ragdoll style. He hit the ground in a bad way, I doubt he's armying anything anymore. I'm not sure what RTB does with their vehicles but we used to share a motor pool so they could borrow our FLAs and humvees if they had to. After a month of not a single vehicle in our motorpool being operable after they hosed them all up, we quit that poo poo immediately. Master Bateman posted:I learned how to drive in Iraq. I'm sorry the army helped you become a bad driver.
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Jan 12, 2015 00:42
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I got my driver badge for the four or five times I drove in Afghanistan.
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Jan 12, 2015 00:52
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Cole posted:I got my driver badge for the four or five times I drove in Afghanistan. everyone in my unit got a drivers badge except for the one guy who drove into the hesco at the gate at FOB Gabe, when his night vision batteries died
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Jan 12, 2015 00:55
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Cole posted:I got my driver badge for the four or five times I drove in Afghanistan. Congrats buddy 
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Jan 12, 2015 00:56
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...
Nostalgia4ColdWar fucked around with this message at 00:32 on Mar 31, 2017 |
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Jan 12, 2015 00:56
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I had to tell a 30 year old who learned to drive in the army what off camber was in regards to a road and why it was a bad thing.
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Jan 12, 2015 01:20
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Victor Vermis posted:When the other two guys at your urinal have to pee just as bad as you do, so all three of you are blasting porcelein and your collective piss-mist tickles your wrists like tiny golden snowflakes.. that's brotherhood.
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Jan 12, 2015 01:48
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Victor Vermis posted:When you really gotta pee but theres a dude dumping at the time but he opens up his legs to let you shoot the gap...that's brotherhood.
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Jan 12, 2015 01:51
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there's literally a thread for this
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Jan 12, 2015 02:13
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It's a relief that policy here mandates you already have a civilian license before I teach you how to drive poorly. At least I can say I trust my students for whom I made licenses to drive competently and defensively. Maybe I'm the idiot.
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Jan 12, 2015 03:48
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Wait, the Army has a driver's badge? So it's like a weapons qual badge except for being able to operate motor vehicle? For some reason this is hilarious to me
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Jan 12, 2015 04:58
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soldiers need constant positive reinforcement which is why they cover themselves in badges and ribbons and patches and medals and poo poo
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Jan 12, 2015 05:09
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Someone post the picture of Petraeus testifying in front of Congress looking like a Banana Republic/DPRK general.
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Jan 12, 2015 05:14
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iyaayas01 posted:Someone post the picture of Petraeus testifying in front of Congress looking like a Banana Republic/DPRK general. You know what they say: dress for the job you want, not the one you have.
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Jan 12, 2015 05:18
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What's the point of pinning all that stuff on if the lapel's gonna hide half of it?
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Jan 12, 2015 05:19
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They make L shaped ribbon racks so the ribbons can be seen around the lapel.
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Jan 12, 2015 05:21
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Kavak posted:What's the point of pinning all that stuff on if the lapel's gonna hide half of it? Lookin like a soviet general, gently caress.
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Jan 12, 2015 05:34
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Thump! posted:Lookin like a soviet general, gently caress. poo poo looks like a game of tetris goin tits up
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Jan 12, 2015 06:20
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Man, he's the highest ranking idiot here. hosed his own damned biographer. Also, now he's getting in big, big trouble for it. Semper hosed. 
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Jan 12, 2015 06:22
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Absurd Alhazred posted:Got caught loving and emailing about loving his own damned biographer.
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Jan 12, 2015 06:25
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That's what I was saying. If a gently caress happens in the woods, and nobody else knows about it, did it really happen? no
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Jan 12, 2015 06:30
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