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Chomp8645 posted:I feel like you're the only one who gets me toggle. i every breath you take chomp8645, i'll be watching SaltLick posted:king of the hill tribute i blew a bigger load shes mine are you ready for this jack battle??
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Feb 21, 2015 04:58
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toggle posted:
heh...ive only used 1% of my semen
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Feb 21, 2015 05:16
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his jizz level... is 9000!!!
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Feb 21, 2015 05:21
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This thread and the goonrush to ngc's inbox warning her about chomp have pretty much ensured she'll instead take a chance with letting her mom find "a really nice jewish boy about your age" for once
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Feb 21, 2015 05:54
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oy vey
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Feb 21, 2015 06:13
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and shalom Edit boy do I have a pair of matzah bawls for her
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Feb 21, 2015 06:13
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Setzer Gabbiani posted:This thread and the goonrush to ngc's inbox warning her about chomp have pretty much ensured she'll instead take a chance with letting her mom find "a really nice jewish boy about your age" for once Now that's taking it too far man. She hadn't responded so we we're already on a fine course for nothing at all to occur. If you really did that then you've probably done more to scare the poor girl then I ever would have. Goons. They can never leave well enough alone.
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Feb 21, 2015 06:34
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Chomp8645 posted:Now that's taking it too far man. She hadn't responded so we we're already on a fine course for nothing at all to occur. If you really did that then you've probably done more to scare the poor girl then I ever would have. i dont think anything anyone could possibly do could scare a girl more than you
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Feb 21, 2015 07:15
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NotDeadYet posted:i dont think anything anyone could possibly do could scare a girl more than you I disagree.
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Feb 21, 2015 07:20
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 My inbox this morning.
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Feb 21, 2015 09:18
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ah the fabled compliment-apology-racial appeal combo
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Feb 21, 2015 11:28
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I thought the point of being white was not having your race fetishised by weirdos
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Feb 21, 2015 15:55
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"I could make a lonely socially awkward nerd a very happy man." It's got this gal 22 pages of attention on here so far. Good luck to her.
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Feb 21, 2015 16:54
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Stottie Kyek posted:I thought the point of being white was not having your race fetishised by weirdos On my first date with a hispanic girl from OKC she told me that she's only attracted to whites and other hispanics, with white apparently taking slight precedent. Being white owns.
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Feb 21, 2015 19:13
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"Be white" is honestly the best piece of dating advice I have ever received.
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Feb 21, 2015 19:28
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im a quirky girl, kinda random, just looking for a real man who doesnt play games except scrabble, that poo poo is my jam
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Feb 21, 2015 19:44
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Hood Ornament posted:im a quirky girl, kinda random, just looking for a real man who doesnt play games A friend of mine was using OKC and noticed all the mentions of "don't wanna play no games" and just thought that the online dating scene was fervently anti video game until I explained what they really meant.
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Feb 21, 2015 19:51
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gingerlady posted:I'm pretty straight-forward so I'll just get into it: I'm an alpha female. I know who I am and where I'm going, I'm confident, hyper independent, hilarious, well-read, and always honest (sometimes good, sometimes bad). What's an alpha female?
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Feb 21, 2015 23:50
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ThePriceIsRight posted:What's an alpha female? She has a faux penis, like a hyena
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Feb 22, 2015 00:14
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HerStuddMuffin posted:"Be white" is honestly the best piece of dating advice I have ever received. the thing people don't realize about being black is, even if you have an above average penis, people will think it is small, because they assume you have a huge dong i've never seen a black guy naked because all of them have been ashamed of their totally average weiners
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Feb 22, 2015 00:30
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quote:My self-summary quote:profile that was already too drat long quote:You should message me if
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Feb 22, 2015 05:00
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If u got that pokeball tattoo then flaunt it, what are ya, crazy?!
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Feb 22, 2015 07:06
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why do all nutty these profiles sound the same after a while? cool tit tat sweetie
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Feb 22, 2015 07:19
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quote:-At this moment in time I am most interested in connecting with poly men
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Feb 23, 2015 12:34
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The weirdest thing for me personally, living in the South, is all the women with some variation of 'yay Jesus' or 'God is my number one man, and if he isn't yours don't message me' that contact me. I'm an atheist and I don't make a huge deal about it, but it is marked off on my profile, in the details section. Like, if this is a huge deal, your #1 dealbreaker, then why the hell are you messaging me, when that deal is pre-broken? Another, tragic point for me, is coming to terms with the fact that, as a 31 year old, I might have to stop automatically excluding chicks with kids. 
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Feb 23, 2015 13:42
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Dreqqus posted:The weirdest thing for me personally, living in the South, is all the women with some variation of 'yay Jesus' or 'God is my number one man, and if he isn't yours don't message me' that contact me. I'm an atheist and I don't make a huge deal about it, but it is marked off on my profile, in the details section. Like, if this is a huge deal, your #1 dealbreaker, then why the hell are you messaging me, when that deal is pre-broken? I'm pretty sure they get brownie points with Jesus if they convert you.
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Feb 23, 2015 13:52
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ive got a chunk of steak stuck right in the back of my teeth and i cant dislkodge it witrh my tongue of floss help
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Feb 23, 2015 13:54
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Dreqqus posted:as a 31 year old, I might have to stop automatically excluding chicks with kids. The only line I'll never cross.
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Feb 23, 2015 14:19
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what's with the people who stop responding to your like 2nd or 3rd message exchange but keep visiting your profile?
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Feb 23, 2015 15:05
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sorry about htat
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Feb 23, 2015 15:10
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didnt realise you could tell
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Feb 23, 2015 15:10
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They are masturbating to your photos/income stat if you're an uggo.
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Feb 23, 2015 15:11
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Dienes posted:I'm pretty sure they get brownie points with Jesus if they convert you. Christianity, to some, is like a Sears credit card Hey manager (bishop) I signed up (converted) 11 customers (people who do poo poo like vote "undecided" in yes/no polls) this quarter
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Feb 23, 2015 15:11
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Lee Harvey Oswald posted:what's with the people who stop responding to your like 2nd or 3rd message exchange but keep visiting your profile? You're ugly or creepy and they're showing your profile to their friends
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Feb 23, 2015 15:12
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Dreqqus posted:They are masturbating to your photos/income stat if you're an uggo. highly doubt that 
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Feb 23, 2015 15:12
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 My self-summary Welcome to Lady Heather's world of curiosities! On the main stage today is a woman who is unlike any you have ever laid eyes on. She is cut from a cloth all of her own. If you have stumbled here expecting to view the, ever so boring, prissy, pumpkin spice latte drinking, Ugg boot wearing, no carb eating, reality tv watching, top 40 listening, Cosmo reading, kind of girl, you have come to the wrong place. She marches to the beat of a much different drummer. She has come here to kick rear end and chew bubblegum, and she's all out of bubblegum... Quirky, sassy, feisty, silly, and a bit of a smart rear end. She's a free thinker and opinionated. An independent woman who doesn't let anything stand in her way. An elusive female nerd, rarely seen in the wild. She own's $1500 worth of board games and loves to play video games. A regular attendee of the Renaissance Festival. She can often be found perusing her way around local record stores on the hunt for great albums on vinyl. Museums call to her. Her Netflix history is filled with documentaries, Doctor Who, and Star Trek. She attended Convergence 10 years in a row. Former WoW, D&D, and Magic player.. Cheesy, over the top, horror movies, and guys who appreciate them the way she does, are the way to her heart. Nothing makes her quite as happy as a night of ordering a pizza and cuddling on the couch while watching something like "Dead Alive".  But wait there's more! She's so much more than you're average geek. She's teaching herself how to play the guitar. Loves karaoke. She will never turn down going to a bonfire. She loves roller derby and has dreams of becoming a roller girl. Ok, enough silliness for tonight. I will finish trying to sell myself later, when I have more time. [editorial note: she has answered over 2000 questions] For those of you still reading here's a taste of what I'm looking for from this site... I'm not here looking for a knight in shining armor, however, I hope to find my dork in tin foil. :P I've been single for over a year and it has given me a lot of time to grow as a person and discover what I really want out of life. I'm looking for someone who knows how to enjoy life and doesn't take it too seriously. Someone I can geek out and be silly with. Someone who will go on random, goofy, adventures with me but will also be ok cuddled up on the couch watching movies or entire seasons of TV shows. I'm hoping to find a partner and an equal, someone I can connect with and build a meaningful, real, relationship with. When I am with someone it is because I want them, not because I need them, and I am looking for the same in return. I'm also looking for some cool people to expand my social circle. You can never have too many friends. What I’m doing with my life Other than being awesome and kicking life's rear end, I'm a paraprofessional. I'm currently in my 12th year of working with special needs students. I spent 8 years working with the developmentally disabled, 2 years working with kids with emotional and behavioral disorders, and I'm starting my 2nd year working in an autism program. I love my job. I love kids and can't imagine doing anything else. It really is a wonderful thing to know that I am making the little slice of the world I was put on a better place for those around me. In turn they have made that little slice of the world a much better place for me. I have learned so much about life from them. They've taught me how to be a much better person and not take anything for granted. I’m really good at Being a smart-rear end, cooking delicious food, retaining useless (yet interesting or entertaining) facts and information, getting sunburned, building Ikea furniture, being a klutz, and laughing at myself. The first things people usually notice about me I'm smokin' hot!!! Duh! :P I have more curves than a Mazda commercial. :P I have my own sense of style and a pretty big personality, so I tend to stand out from the crowd. Depending on what I'm wearing, my tattoos. I have 5 of them and plan on getting more. My biggest one takes up almost the entire lower half of my left leg. (I still have another 6 hour session left to do on it. Anyone want to keep me company at the end of March?  )I've been told that I remind people of Garcia from Criminal Minds. Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food I love to read and I'll read just about anything. My favorite genres are horror/suspense, Sci Fi, and fantasy. Stephen King is one of my favorite authors. Some of my favorites include The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon, Blaze, and The Talisman. IT and The Stand are next on my list to read. Some other favorites are American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis, The Hunger Games trilogy, Harry Potter series, Stranger in a Strange Land by Robert Heinlein, Let the Right One In by John Ajvide Lindqvist, Heart Shaped Box by Joe Hill. I love movies and especially love watching them with good company. Most of my favorites are either Sci Fi or fantasy, but I'll watch just about anything especially anything quirky or outside of the box. I also love cheesy 80's horror films! They will always have a soft spot in my heart. Here are a few I would rather not live without. Wrath of Khan (I was lucky enough to see a showing of it in the theater a few summers ago. Absolutely amazing!), Wristcutters: A Love Story, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, The Goonies, Silence of the Lambs, Princess Bride, Anything by Hayao Miyazaki, They Live, Labyrinth, Gremlins, Lars and the Real Girl, Clue, The Shining, Saved!, Documentaries (Really like Werner Herzog's stuff.), Dead Alive, The Wall, Mrs. Doubtfire, The Apple, Forbidden Zone, Phantom of the Paradise, Street Trash, Night of the Creeps, Brazil, Suspiria, Blue Velvet, American Psycho, Eraserhead, A Clockwork Orange. TV: Doctor Who, Game of Thrones, Sherlock, The IT Crowd, Orange is the New Black, Freaks and Geeks, Breaking Bad, The Walking Dead, The Big Bang Theory, How I Met Your Mother, American Horror Story, Firefly, Star Trek (TOS and TNG) Music: It would take far too long to list everything. I can't really function without music. I listen to a bit of almost everything. Just to give you an idea, here are a few of my staples. Pink Floyd, Pavlov's Dog, Mumford and Sons, Foo Fighters, Tegan and Sara, Mayer Hawthorne, Genesis (more of the Peter Gabriel era stuff though), Fitz and the Tantrums, Jethro Tull, The Spill Canvas, The Black Keys, Arctic Monkeys, Rise Against, Blink 182, old Green Day Food: I'm not very picky. I'll try just about anything. I have yet to have tried Indian food, but I want to. The six things I could never do without 1. Good conversation/good company 2. Laughing so hard that I snort 3. Spending time with the people I love 4. My kitties 5. The "little things" 6. My guitar 7. Adventure of some kind 8. Cuddling I know, that's more than six. What can I say? I'm a rebel. :P I spend a lot of time thinking about How many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop, or what I would do for a Klondike Bar. :P Honestly, my mind never stops. I am constantly thinking about something. On a typical Friday night I am Usually I'm just relaxing. Chilling with my cats looking for something ridiculous to watch on Netflix. Learning new songs on my guitar. Having some wine and playing records. Hanging out with friends. Stuff like that. The most private thing I’m willing to admit I'm a hopeless, bleeding-heart, romantic. You should message me if If you made it through that wall of text without "Run to the Hills" by Iron Maiden blaring in your head. Or after reading the previous sentence that song got stuck in your head. I don't know how selectively it says I respond. Don't let that deter you. You wouldn't believe the amount of messages I get that are completely inappropriate or are so riddled with such bad spelling and grammar that I need a decoder ring to decipher them. :P If you want to go to Ikea and play hide and seek, before or after getting some delicious Swedish meatballs. If you want go to The Chatterbox and play some board games. Or if you want to get drinks at Psycho Suzi's, Grumpy's, Donny Dirk's, or any other cool place, with an awesome girl. Seriously, I know one. Maybe I could introduce you to her. If you know how to play cribbage and want to get your butt kicked by a girl. If anything in my profile interests you don't be afraid to say "Hi". I don't bite... usually. In all seriousness, DON'T message me if: ~You are looking for a hookup, one night stand, fwb, etc. It's not going to happen. ~You are poly or in any sort of open relationship. Nothing against you, I'm just very monogamous and know that it wouldn't work. I failed the sharing part of kindergarten. ~You are homophobic or believe that being gay is a sin. My best friend is gay and I can't be with someone who can't accept him fully.   I don't know where to begin with this photo...there is too much to describe. But this is me and my best friend. Yes, he is wearing a Star Trek uniform... (Don't worry guys, he's gay. Obviously.)  The obligatory black and white "Why yes, I do play the guitar" photo. :P  There's just too much awesome going on here to put into words. So I won't. It's funnier that way. Taken October 2012. (If you really want to know what's going on you'll just have to message me! Buahahahaha...) :P *** She also has another album titled "Crazy cat lady."
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Feb 23, 2015 18:36
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She's a Duke Nukem fan. Wet it up
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Feb 23, 2015 19:05
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What I’m doing with my life Training I’m really good at Eating and sleeping. Talking about myself. The first things people usually notice about me My incredibly high power level. Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food I will eat anything as long as it helps with my training I spend a lot of time thinking about What I'm going to eat for lunch. The meaning of the life, universe, and everything. You should message me if You should message me if you also happen to have a high power level too. I am always looking for a challenge.
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Feb 23, 2015 19:12
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I know this is the wrong thing to point out in that profile but god drat it drives me up the wall when people misuse the word "peruse."
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Feb 23, 2015 19:15
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Stottie Kyek posted:I thought the point of being white was not having your race fetishised by weirdos lol explain well-off black men and 2nd generation asian women then basically miscegenation is the future, so embrace a body browner than yours MLKQUOTEMACHINE fucked around with this message at 19:27 on Feb 23, 2015 |
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Feb 23, 2015 19:24
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